Fiction Challenges Fact

Sonu's husband Viswam is a writer. He files his short stories in a folder named 'Stories' in their computer and invites Sonu to read and critique the stories. He welcomes the suggestions she offers. One evening while searching for a misplaced file Sonu quite by accident chanced upon a file rather intriguingly named 'Fiction challenges Fact' in his accounts folder. She opened the file and found it was a short story. It was not like him to hide his stories. Challenged by the title she read on.

The story was about a woman who visits the U.S. on an exchange scholarship where interesting things happen to her. He relates the incidents as if he is excerpting from her diary. When she started reading Sonu had a smile on her face. The main character in the story was doing much the same things she had done in her recent visit to the U.S. Suddenly there was change in Sonu's demeanour. Her eyes widened, she was sweating, and her hands trembled. It was clear that Viswam did not want her to read the story, but she could not stop.

* * *

Extracts from the diary of Bindu Rajan

Thursday 23 May 2002

It is exactly a month since I landed in U. S. in a teacher exchange programme. I am taking three days off from my college in Houston to meet my friend and schoolmate Rita in Austin. Rita and her husband Mike were at Austin airport to receive me. I was meeting her for the first time after her marriage. She seems to be happily married. Her husband Mike is tall and handsome. He has adapted to a life style of an American with an Indian wife. He orders her about the way our rural husbands do and Rita, in true darmapatini fashion, does his bidding with cheerful alacrity. They seem a loving, caring couple.

As I was resting in their home after bath and breakfast my mind wandered to my own life with my husband Viswam. During the early days of our marriage we were a loving, caring couple too. Then our common interests held us together, but after ten years the things we do not have in common has raised an invisible wall between us. The core of the problem is he has no friends and does not want any. The result is we do not have a family with whom we are close, and there are no community activities we take part in. I am outgoing and gregarious by nature. He does not object to my friends, encourages me rather to take part in social activities. I do, but sometimes attending function by myself makes me feel as if I am a widow. It can be miserable. Our sex life is also not what it used to be. He expects the same keenness I had during our early days of marriage. He expects me to take the initiative from time to time. He says it stimulates him. I have never been able to do so. I constantly brood on what I feel are his shortcomings, and I do not feel that I must go all out to please him. May be if I focus on the good in him our life might change.

Rita had met Mike when they were in the same school in New York both doing advanced training in sociology. For Rita, who was then not in the first flush of youth, it was love at first sight. Mike was a divorcee after a marriage that barely lasted two years. They were married, and soon after both got jobs in Austin, and they moved to Texas.

Rita and I talked about our school and college days in Madras. We can do that for hours at a stretch. After lunch Rita left for her work and I spent two happy hours playing pool in the basement with Mike who had chosen to work from home to keep me company. My experience with snooker helped me. With Mike teaching me the finer points I was able to give him a good fight. He is a fine player. He said this is the first time he has played a decent game on his table since they installed it a year ago. He said we must have some more games and I agreed. I like the game, which is much less difficult than snooker, and I like playing against Mike whom I am certain I can beat at least once before I leave.

When Rita came home she brought a movie cassette that she said she wanted all three of us to see. The movie, Overreached, was doing very well at the box office. It was about a young bachelor who has come recently to a neighbourhood. The woman next door, a mother of two, falls madly in love with the handsome youth. The various ways in which she tries to attract him and seduce him is the subject of the story.

The woman had just then started her manoeuvres when the phone rang. The call was from a neighbour of an aunt of Rita who lived in a small town about an hour's drive away. The neighbour said that the aunt had chest pain and she had asked her to inform Rita. Rita had of course to go. I declined the offer to accompany her because I did not want to be in the way if the lady had to be hospitalised. It was seven in the evening. There was time for Rita to drive up and come back before night fall at around ten in Austin. Rita left, and Mike switched off the player and said, 'We'll talk.'

He was a student of sociology and I suspected that he, like most Westerners, was into their perennial favourite topic of the Indian caste system. He was into something deeper. He wanted to know how democracy operated, not in the cities, but in the villages. I had a lot to say, and he had firm beliefs too, with the result that at times the argument became heated, but never acrimonious. We got to know each other well with the result that when we got back to the movie shortly after it was natural of us to be seated side by side holding hands.

The director of the movie had handled the scenes with great delicacy. The young man is repairing the fence, and the woman is at the other side hanging clothes out to dry. Incidentally the story is from rural America of about fifty years ago when women washed clothes and string them out to dry. She undoes her blouse buttons when he is not watching and as the breeze blows, her blouse flaps this way and that way, exposing part of one breast, and then part of the other. The young man wants to see and at the same does not know how to do so without the woman noticing. I tighten my grip on Mike's fist. His hand is on my thigh and unknown to me I am pulling it up. I am without sex for three months and I am excited.

The movie now becomes tense. The woman has written to the young man, and the letter has by mistake gone into the bunch of letters meant for her husband. She ventures into his room to retrieve it. I am terrified, and as always I close my eyes or bend down. This time I turned and buried my face on Mike's shoulder. He took his hands from my thigh and put his arm across my back and held me firmly by the shoulder. His face must have come close to mine for I felt his breath on me. I was hot—ready to explode.

The phone rang; Mike took it. It was from Rita. She was taking her aunt to hospital. As her aunt's son has come down from where he was working Rita said she will come home as soon as she saw her aunt comfortable in her hospital bed. Rita said that by eleven she expected to be back. I took this chance to go up. I emptied my bladder and washed myself for I was wet from excitement. I changed my thick skirt for a nightie of very thin material. I was mad with desire for this Mills and Boon hero, and reckless. I wore neither bra nor knickers. With a thudding heart I ran back. I was worried that we may not be able to resume the cosy position we were in.

Soon the action becomes extremely frightening. The woman is climbing up the creaky wooden stairs to enter her husband's study to recover her letter. It was too much for me. I buried my face on the lower part of Mike's chest and he held me in a tight embrace.

"Shall I give to running commentary of what is happening?" he said. I looked up at him and nodded. "Now I will make you more comfortable," he said, and proceeded to do so. He put his arms into my armpits and pulled me up and laid me face down on his chest. "You rest more comfortably till I blow the all clear. She is now in the room. The husband is coming up. All her escape routes are cut off." I pressed my head more firmly on his chest. There was the sound of an explosion and Mike grip on me loosened and I slipped down. He caught me and pulled me up. My nightie came up rather, exposing my rear. Mike now gripped my naked waist and pulled me. I was now lying on him face down, but naked below the waist.

"The setting off of dynamite by the quarrying crew has diverted the husband's attention," said Mike. "Pressure on her has eased but the all clear has not sounded. He is still blocking her exit. Now he has gone up the veranda and she is waiting for an opportunity to slip away behind his back. It's tense. Turn round and have a peep." His face was close to mine, almost touching. I cautiously turned my head and saw her as she slipped out unseen by her husband. I had to pull down my dress but lying face down on him I could not do that.

"Interesting things are about to happen which you will not like to miss," said Mike. I'll help you turn around," He wrapped his one arm around my waist and another round my chest pressing both my bare breasts and turned me round, easily for he was strong and I was lithe. He made space for me between his thighs. His one arm was holding me up by the waist, and the other cupping one breast. I was not concerned about my nakedness. I enjoyed it rather. Exciting things were happening on the screen.

The woman was inside a room in her house and the neighbour was under the window on his side of the fence. She was beckoning to him peeling off her clothes the while. Her blouse comes off displaying a magnificent pair of breasts. I was so hot that I had no shame and no control over my movements. I held the hand of Mike on my breast and slowly took it down and placed in on my clit. As he did not rub I took his finger and rubbed my clit moving my hips in rhythm to that movement. Mike now came to life.

Gently he pulled off my frock that was now lying crumpled around my neck. He turned my naked body around and made me straddle him. We kissed passionately and then as I undid his shirt he gently rubbed my clit most delightfully with fingers as soft as rose petals. I pulled off his shirt and worked on his pants. With help from him I removed his pants and freed his penis. I have never done it in any other than the missionary position though my husband wanted many times to try the woman on top posture. But now eagerly I held his penis and inserted it in. I was so wet that it plopped in. Both of us came quickly. I screamed loudly as I had a massive orgasm and I lay exhausted in the same straddling pose. The clock struck eleven. I hurriedly got up and taking my frock ran up as he turned and watched my naked body disappear up the stairs.

I washed and lay under the comforter. Later I heard the car and soon after Rita came in. I pretended to be asleep. She lifted the comforter covering my face and tenderly kissed her long time friend and seducer of her husband on the forehead. 'Good night,' she said lovingly.

Friday 24 May 2002

I woke up at three in the morning and sat shivering. The enormity of my action of the previous night had percolated into my conscience. I had been unfaithful to my husband, who had been true to me, and kind to me, and who meant everything to me in this world. He had done everything that a husband should do and more, and I had cheated him without so much as a thought. And I had forced my best friend's husband to cheat his wife. I lay sobbing and slept. I woke up late. How to face Mike and Rita?

"Late riser as usual," said Rita as she greeted me. Mike waved a greeting without any trace of animation. I suppose I also behaved quiet naturally as if nothing whatever had happened. The funny thing was that all the passion of last night was gone I know not where.

"How was the movie?"

"It was too tense. I did not see the whole of it."

I went about normally but my heart was heavy. In a brightly lighted room with all the windows open I had indulged in a spectacular seduction of my best friend's husband while at home I never did anything spontaneous in sex play in spite of my husband's pleadings to do so. Even having a dim light I will allow only after an argument that often so annoyed my husband that he turned away in a huff. I do not know what madness made me do all that I did that day.

Saturday 25 May 2002

Time for taking leave was at hand. I do no know how Mike and I erased all thought of our passion of a day before. We were absolutely without any special feeling. I formally kissed both and entered the aircraft.

Friday 30 September 2002

The aircraft was approaching Madras. The announcer was droning that malaria was endemic in Madras and visitors from abroad must take prophylactic tablets. The duty free trolley was making its last round. Soon the plane will land and in an hour's time I will be face to face with my husband whom I have so cruelly wronged. Will the tortures that I have suffered for the past four months end or will it come to a climax? I knew not the answer.

I was leaving the airport lobby pushing the luggage cart. He was not inside but just as I got out I saw him. He had spotted me and on his face was that smile of his that I always found comforting. An urge to hold him and kiss him became almost unbearable. He took the cart and pushed it towards our car.

We loaded the boxes. He hospitably opened the back seat. My heart stopped. Did he know, and was he telling me that we were from now on just friends? I got in, and he got in after me. Now I knew why he wanted me in the back seat—the glasses were shaded. I have never hugged him and kissed him with greater intensity in all the ten years of married life.

Tuesday 31 December 2002

This is the last day of a very eventful year. I am a changed person since my return. I know what he does not like and I never do it. I do not care for friends and group activities for all said and done they are just ways of wasting time and money. Our sex life has also changed beyond recognition. The inhibitions that were plaguing me are now gone. If I can indulge in sex with abandon with a stranger I can do more for my husband; and I do. We should be very happy, and we are for the most part, but my guilt feelings are eating into me. I am never really free of it. My husband I fear suspects something for at times I see him sitting with intense sadness on his face. I have never seen him like that before this cursed exchange visit of mine. Will ever a day come when we will be free again?

Sonu shut down the computer, folded her forearms on the table, and resting her head on them she sobbed. Sonu visited the U.S. the same time the heroine of her husband's story was doing her rounds. She also visited a former classmate married to an American, not in Texas, but in Illinois. Both the friend in the story and her friend for real were married to divorcees, and significantly the dates of the visit were the same. What happened during that visit was significant too. It brought Sonu to a state bordering on collapse.

* * *

Sonu was in Chicago on an exchange programme when she received a call from her classmate and friend Meega in the nearby university town of Champion inviting her for a weekend visit. Meega was married in the proper family arranged way in Madras. With her husband she immigrated to the U.S. and less than a year after she developed a friendship with her college mate Len, and after divorcing her husband she married him. Sonu did not quite approve of her action. After an angry exchange of letters they ceased to correspond. Meega somehow got to know of her presence in Chicago and invited her to spend a weekend with her. Sonu accepted.

On the first night of her visit Sonu listened to Meega's story. No, her husband from Madras was not at fault at all. It was simply a case of Meega finding Len irresistible. Meega prepared sambhar for Sonu, who was tired of burgers and pizzas. They were in the midst of their reminisce of their college days when Meega had a call from her college. Her postgraduate needed her help. In the U.S. students work all 24 hour of the day and it was not unusual for her students to call at all sorts of odd hours. Meega asked Sumi to get the sambhar ready and share it with Len who has acquired a taste for that spicy gravy.

Len and Meega ate bread and sambhar with relish, Len especially. He soaked bread slices in sambhar and ate it with a spoon. Len then invited her to watch him work with his computer. He was in his middle forties, about seven years older than Maega. He was of medium height and slightly over weight. This was his third marriage. He was an expert in creating anti virus software. He has a small room full of monitors, and keyboards, and countless black plastic boxes of various sizes.

Sonu was in a nightdress of light material. It was not an improper dress when Meega was about, but not so comfortable when alone in the company of Len. The neckline was rather daring. She would have liked to change to something more appropriate but did not want to appear a prude. She sat next to him as he described his work. When she asked him about hacking his eyes lit up. He told her a lot about the techniques of hacking and taught her to do a bit of hacking on her own. He was a very good teacher for she was able screw up a programme he set up in another computer for the experiment. Then he taught her how to create graphic titles for movies. He invited her to take the keyboard and design one herself. She accepted the offer eagerly.

She sat one a stool and Len sat behind her on a higher stool. From his vantage point he could look directly down her neck. She could feel his eyes playing on the valley. She surreptitiously looked down and was shocked to see the whole of her breasts tits included. Shocked she was, and also thrilled. The only defence she could offer was that she was sex starved for almost three months. This heat can be particularly aggravating in this distant land where, whatever way you turn your eyes you see cuddling couples.

Len did more than just look. He kneaded her shoulder muscles that made her moan at times with pleasure for he did it with great delicacy. He has had some training in physiotherapy and she had told him earlier that both her shoulders ached. He occasionally fingered the keyboard to correct her and as he was behind her he had almost to embrace her to get to the keys.

Sonu got up. She felt that a little more of this and both may lose their grip altogether.

"We'll sit on the bench outside and enjoy the coolness of this moonlight night," she said and he agreed for it was warm inside. The wooden bench had no backrest. It was under a large tree in the middle of the grounds. He requested her to rest her back on him. He sat straddling the bench and she pushed myself between his thighs and rested on his chest. He tugged the back of her dress.

"You just raise you back and release your dress. I'll massage you back till all the aches disappear." He lifted the dress off her back and kneaded the back muscles till she was clicking and hissing with pleasure. Her sexual desire was now fully aroused and when his hands soon after cupped her breasts she turned round and sought his lips. Now he was fingering her tits as expertly as he did his computer keyboard. She was mad with desire. She saw a couple in silhouettes in the bay window of the neighbour's house watching them, but she cared not. It added to the excitement.

He removed her dress and threw it on the grass. She slid back, folded her knees and spread out her thighs as far as her hips allowed. Len placed his palms on her mound and typed. It was once-in-a-lifetime experience. His fingertips hit the tip of her clit with unvarying precision and with the right force. All fingers worked on the same key and they never missing. As she vibrated he hit faster and faster till her pent up energy poured out in surges. She screamed a muffled scream. She lay back exhausted.