Filling the Void Ch. 02

"This works for me." She forced a smile as she wriggled her hips back into her jeans before leaning down to tug on her boots. "Do you think your friend has anymore of the stuff you slipped in my drink?" she asked pointedly. "I like the way they make me feel." She lied, having another purpose for the pills.

"You knew?" he asked with a slight stammer, feeling akin to a deer trapped in the head lights of a semi.

"Yeah..." she nodded "I'm not really blind... Or dumb you know Chasen." She said matter of fact tone.

"I'm sorry." He breathed hesitantly.

"Don't be... Just get me more." She pleaded softly as he led her from the bathroom. "Matt..." she breathed, catching his arm gently and turning him to face her. For a moment, all she could manage was to stare up at him sullenly.

"Yes Darlin." He smiled down patiently, guessing from the wrinkle of the bridge of her nose, that she was struggling to say something.

"I'm not a drug addict." She said firmly. "I don't have a problem." She said, trying to assure away the concerned look from his face. "I just want to escape my life for a little while." She said honestly.

"It's okay." He smiled, brushing her cheek lightly. "I'll take care of you." He vowed softly.

"Thank you." She yawned tiredly, allowing him to draw her against his chest affectionately for a moment.

"What ever is going on in that head of yours Darlin, I promise to make it go away." He promised against the crown of her head, breathing in her lavender scent, committing it to memory.

"I wish you could." She frowned, snuggling against him tiredly. "Please take me home Matt." She pleaded holding him tighter, desperate to keep her tears at bay.

"Yes Ma'am." He smiled, kissing her forehead and giving her a gentle squeeze before settling her away from him. Hesitantly, he handed her his keys. "I'm going to go talk to Brandon for a second. Go out to my truck, it's the big black one, and wait for me there."

"Yes sir." She laughed, taking the ring of keys he offered to her. She couldn't help but notice the small gold wedding band that was looped into the key ring. "Interesting." She thought aloud, as she made her way through the increasing crowd to find the exit.

"I know it's a little out of the way, but I'll be more comfortable at my house." She assured him as he silently drove out of the busy late night city traffic.

"I'll take you any where you want to go Darlin." He said softly, laying her hand on her thigh. "Just as long as I don't have to leave you tonight. What are you doing way over there? Come here girl." He demanded softly, flipping up the arm rest, making room on the seat for her to snuggle up closer to his side.

"You aren't going to be leaving me tonight." She said firmly, as she slid across the seat to nestle hesitantly against his side.

"You know, I've made love to you and still don't know your name." he pointed out as she draped her hand over his stomach lazily. His use of the term 'making love' shocked him painfully, almost as much as the warmth that filled his heart from her nearness.

"I told you Chasen, I am who ever you want me to be." She laughed against his shoulder, allowing her fingertips the luxury of idly exploring the ridges of his toned abdomen through his cotton t shirt.

"Tell me your name." he demanded, turning his head slightly to press a light kiss to her forehead, yet another affectionate gesture that seemed to be so instinctive when she was near.

"I'll tell you my name if you tell me something about you." She negotiated.

"I'm an open book." He nodded his agreement. "I'll tell you anything you want to know."

"Tell me about the wedding band on your key ring." She asked curiously.

"The wedding band?" he sighed, "You jump right to the sensitive subjects don't you." He laughed nervously. "It belonged to my wife." He said some what evasively.

"You're married?" she questioned interestedly.

"I was. Not now." He answered simply.

"Did she leave you?" she asked, finding herself genuinely curious about the man that had ruined her life.

"In a manner of speaking." He sighed, unwittingly drawing her more firmly to his side as he spoke. "She died three years ago." He explained softly, feeling the heavy cloud of darkness engulf his heart as it always did when she was brought up in conversation.

"What happened?" she asked turning soft curious eyes up to study the face she could barely make out in the dim lights of the trucks dash.

"She was pregnant...There were complications... She didn't make it." Matt explained in a hollow voice he barely recognized. It was the first time he'd discussed his wife's death with any one out side of his family, he wasn't sure why he was discussing it in the first place. It would have been so much easier to lie.

"The baby?" she asked, annoyed by the tears that filled her eyes, threatening to spill out at any given moment.

"John Isaac, it was a boy, he lived for eighteen days in an incubator." He said, not hearing the cracking of his voice over the onslaught of memories. "There were so many tubes and monitors hooked to him that you could barely see his tiny little body through all of them most of the time."

"I'm so sorry." She breathed, feeling the pain in his voice as acutely as she felt her own. Despite herself, thick warm tears slipped from her eyes, dripping idly on shirt.

"That was a long time ago." He said, trying to convince himself as much as her. Feeling the sudden dampening of his shirt, moved him far more that intended to acknowledge or accept at that moment. "Now, what's your name?" he asked desperate to change the subject.

"Anne." She said telling only a half truth. She figured that using her middle name wasn't exactly a lie. "Have you thought about getting remarried, or having more kids?" she asked, more to make conversation than from a real interest.

"It's never crossed my mind." He said honestly. "I could see possibly getting remarried, but trying for another child is out of the fucking question." He bit more harshly than he'd intended. "So, what about the jack ass that hurt you? Tell me about him."

"He destroyed my entire world." She said vaguely "And is walking around oblivious to that fact. The only part of me that was good and decent is dead now but nothing seems to have changed in his life."

"That doesn't sound fair." Matt said seriously, sympathizing with the way she felt. "But, for what it's worth, if he lost you then I think he's the one that got the raw end of the deal. Okay Darlin, I haven't seen a house for like ten miles. Are you sure that you aren't dragging me out into the middle of no where to kill me?" he teased, eager to lighten the mood.

"Not tonight." She replied honestly. "I'm not quite done with you yet."

"You got jokes." He laughed amused by the serious tone in her voice.

"It's just a few more miles." She assured him. She couldn't help but wonder if the sudden racing of her heart was due to nervous energy or a side effect of him spiking her drink.

"You can't honestly live out here." Matt sighed as he turned off the country highway onto a dirt path.

"It's a summer cabin." She laughed. "And I do spend a tremendous amount of time here. Especially lately."

"You're too beautiful to be hiding yourself away from the world because of some damn man."

"I'm not hiding." She laughed as he pulled to a halt behind her black pathfinder. "I'm recuperating."

"This isn't the picture I had in mind, when you said summer cabin." He admitted viewing the large cedar cabin through the high beams of his truck.

"Come on..." She laughed, taking the hand he offered as she stepped down out of his truck. "I promise it's not haunted."

"I think I'm going to head back to the city Darlin." He paused, not entirely sure why warning bells started sounding his tequila addled mind.

"If that's what you want." She sighed, turning to face him fully, studying his concerned green eyes in the moonlight. "It was nice meeting you and thank you for letting me be a notch on your bed post."

"It's not like that." He breathed, genuinely hurt that she would even have such thoughts. "This place is just..."

"It's empty, and quiet, and lonely." She provided the words he was searching for. "That's the point Chasen. It fits me."

"I don't want it to fit you Darlin." He said honestly.

"Then come in and change that." She suggested. "And if you're really nice, I'll even make you breakfast in the morning." She smiled sweetly.

"Just breakfast?" He asked, grasping her waist and drawing her body closer to his. "That's all I'm worth?"

"Yep..." She smiled, not shying away as he dropped a sweet affectionate kiss to her slightly parted lips. "Are you coming or going?"

"Keep looking at me like that..." He warned suggestively.

"Come inside with me. It's too cold out here Matt." She breathed, feeling her body beginning to succumb to the cool night air.

"Alright, but if you murder me and hack me to little pieces, I'm going to be so pissed." He laughed, allowing her to lead him into the cabin.

"Damn it..." She groaned, flicking the light switch to no avail. "I think the breaker tripped again."

"Where's the breaker box?" He questioned curiously.

"Same as in every house I suppose. It's in the basement." She laughed. "Wait here... I'll..." She started, but was cut short by his voice.

"No ma'am. Where you go in this creepy old house, I go." He said firmly as she took his hand and led him blindly through the pitch black rooms.

"Be careful here..." She warned softly. "We're about to go a few steps, and the breaker box, is here." She smiled, striking her lighter in front of the panel box, throwing the on switch to every room but the basement.

"You're the woman that doesn't panic." Matt breathed, laying his hand on her hips. "My God, that is so sexy."

"Really?" She sighed turning toward the sound of his voice. She pressed her trembling palms to his chest. "How sexy do you find me?" She asked softly, pressing him backwards, towards the bed she'd set up in the middle of the room.

"More than... I even have the words for." He admitted, slipping his arms around her waist. A grunt of confusion escaped his lungs as he fell backwards onto the bed. His complaint died in his throat, as he felt her body topple down onto his.

"So..." She sighed, propping her elbows up on his chest and dropping her chin into the palms of her hands, staring down into the darkness where she imagined his face would be. "Does that mean you're open to fulfilling a few of my fantasies tonight?" She asked in a sultry voice she barely recognized.

"What ever you want Darlin..." He groaned, grasping her firm round buttocks in the darkness, massaging her gently through the denim.

"Let me be in control." She breathed, realizing her plan was falling into place so much easier than she'd imagined it would.

"What ever you want Darlin." He breathed, easing his hands from her body, entwining his fingers behind his head. "I'm yours." He groaned as he felt her lips innocently brush against his neck.

"You'll do what ever I ask you?" She questioned softly against his ear, as her hand slid beneath his plain grey T-shirt, curiously exploring his skin as she pushed the fabric higher up on his chest.

"Yes Ma'am." He agreed, rising up slightly from the bed to allow her to pull the shirt free of his hard chest. Already he was hard for her. He couldn't help but wonder if his friend hadn't dosed him as well, as a practical joke. As she began kissing and nipping a slow warm path down his chest, he couldn't deny his desire was all about the woman on top of him. "Anything you ask Anne."

"Anne?" She questioned confusedly, catching herself too late.

"Yes Anne..." Matt said confused by the sudden bout of indignation that filled her voice. "That is your name isn't it?"

"Yes." She stammered, quickly running suitable lies through her head. "But I like it better when you call me Darlin."

"I'm sorry." He smiled, running his fingers through her hair affectionately. "Darlin..." He corrected. "I will do anything and everything you ask of me."

"See... that sounds so much better." She praised, breathing a quiet sigh of relief. Curiously, she returned her hands and lips to his hard hair roughened chest. She couldn't remember a time she'd ever been so curious about a man's body before.

The only man she'd ever had physical contact with, had been Avery's father. The thought of that man's touch sickened her so over the years, she'd never bothered exploring other specimens. She couldn't help but question how odd it felt to be so curious about the man beneath her, especially as deep as her hatred ran for him. She attributed her new found warmth to the spiking of her drink as she slipped from the edge of the bed, kneeling between his legs.

"I don't have a lot of experience." She found herself confessing as she slipped his cowboy boots off his long narrow feet and tossed them aside.

"I could feel that when I made love to you." He smiled, deeply moved by her insecurity, and again finding his use of the L word disconcerting.

"I'm sorry." She breathed, as her hand slid up his thighs, over the hard lump straining against his zipper, pausing as her hands reached the waist line of his jeans.

"Please don't be Darlin." He said softly, catching her hands in his. "I like that very much. You have no idea how rare that is in a woman." Easing her hands back down to his thighs, he unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans. Hesitantly, he lifted his hips up to ease his jean down far enough for her to take over.

"I bet." She laughed nervously, pulling the denim fabric from him one leg at a time and tossing them aside. For a moment, she laid her head on the inside of his thigh debating her next move. Determinedly, she reached under the bed.

"Now what?" He asked softly, sensing her hesitation. He bolted up off the bed so quickly, he knocked her backwards as he felt, more than heard, the click of a cold steel shackle clamping shut on his ankle. "What the fuck?" He growled, suddenly feeling like a caged beast.