Finding Happiness Ch. 02

Donna spoke; her words were directed at the FBI agents, but crafted to reassure Junie. "My husband, Bob Campbell, has gone to town to pick up a few things. I expect him home soon. I am Junie's lawyer and I have advised her to answer all your questions at this time."

Agent Durant stood quietly for a minute and then spoke again. "Ms. Thomas, come sit down." It was not a request. His tone was sharp and impatient.

Junie's eyes flashed up at him. He was looking at her directly, the corner of his mouth turned down in irritation. Junie dropped her eyes, edged around the counter and moved toward the table. Agent Gold moved to pull a chair out for her and Junie shrank back away from him.

"Ms. Thomas! I said sit!" All patience gone, the older agent's voice cracked like a whip. Junie found herself almost falling into the chair in her hurry to obey. She caught a pained expression on the face of the younger agent.

Donna stood to one side watching the agents with a curious expression on her face. After the men sat down across the table from Junie, she moved into the kitchen. "Would either of you gentlemen like a cup of coffee? Junie was just mentioning how she wanted a cup of coffee."

Junie looked up at Donna her eyes confused. Coffee? Why was Donna talking about coffee? She mumbled nervously, "Um, yeah, coffee sounds good."

Agent Gold smiled and eagerly accepted, but Durant just sat staring at Junie, his eyes calculating. Junie felt a shudder of nervousness. It felt like he was stripping the flesh from her bones with the intensity of his regard. As Donna filled the coffee pot with water and fresh grounds, Agent Gold got out a laptop computer and a small recording device and placed them on the table.

Agent Durant's voice was penetrating. "Ms. Thomas, we are here because we need to find out as much as possible about the suspect Sam Card; how he thinks, what he says, what he does. Other than the woman in Oregon, you and your former online Master are the only ones we have to learn these things from."

Junie looked at him puzzled, "Why? I thought that they had all the evidence they needed to convict him in the Oregon case. Why do you need to ask me questions?"

For the first time Agent Gold spoke up. "Ms. Thomas, we have compelling evidence that Sam Card has killed other women. We have two unsolved murders and at least ten other women who are missing. The only thing they have in common is..." The young detective stumbled, paused his face turning red.

Agent Durant slammed his fist on the table. "Shut up, you idiot. If you can't talk about bondage without turning red and stammering like an idiot, just shut up!"

Junie jumped and flinched at the loud noise. Donna spoke, her voice firm. "You are guests in my house. I invited you in and I can invite you out."

The older agent turned to Donna, and for a moment Junie thought he was going to yell at her too. He seemed to swell up and then, took a deep breath. "I am sorry. This whole case has been a series of frustrations. This Samuel Card has covered his tracks very well." He looked at Junie. "Ms. Thomas, you may have something that could help us. There is little question that you have been involved in what people sometimes refer to as B, D, S, M." He said the letters one at time, pausing between each one. "All the women that we think that this Samuel Card has killed were online submissives. We have only two survivors, you and the victim in Oregon. The Oregon woman is cooperating, but we need your story too so we can find patterns in this guy's modus operandi. All serial killers have a pattern."

"But if you have him in custody, what is the point?"

"If we can determine his pattern, we will hopefully be able to identify which of the women that have disappeared are his works. At least it will help us solve some of these cases."

"Okay."

"So are you?"

"Am I what?"

The agent closed his eyes in frustration. He spoke slowly, enunciating like he was talking to a child. "Submissive."

Junie turned to Donna, her eyes alarmed. Donna shrugged, "Answer the man's question, Junie."

"Yes, sir, I guess I am."

"At least we have that out of the way. You gave the name of a James Conrad as the man you were engaging in these bondage behaviors with. Is that correct?" His voice was still patronizing.

Junie was beginning to feel increasingly angry at the way this man was talking. Her voice took on a sarcastic edge. "Yes, I engaged in bondage behaviors with that man." Her face was red, and her eyes were furious.

Donna interrupted, "Agent Durant, how familiar are you with the lifestyle?"

The FBI agent frowned at being interrupted. "I know what I need to know."

Donna flushed and she blinked a few times. Deliberately mocking his contemptuous tone and his southern accent, she taunted, "Then perhaps you would be aware that your manner is insulting and embarrassing to someone who is a member of this so called B, D, S, M lifestyle."

At this moment Bob came in the back door. He stopped and took in the scene. He could tell that Donna was furious and struggling to control her temper. Just as clearly, Junie looked miserable, sitting at the table her head lowered between her hunched shoulders. He did not know who these two men were, but the huge black car parked by the garage had feds written all over it, feds or the mafia.

Donna looked up clearly relieved that he was back. "Bob, good, the FBI is here to interview Junie."

"That would explain the characteristic large black car in the driveway." Bob held out his hand, a broad smile on his face, but his eyes were guarded.

Donna spoke up again, "This is Agent Durant and Agent Gold."

Bob nodded and sat down next to Junie; he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her to lean against him. "It seems like this interview has Junie a little upset. I am not sure what has been going on around here, but I will not tolerate disrespect in my house." His tone was final.

Agent Durant exploded, "What the hell is the matter with all you people? Every time I try to interview one of you I get stonewalled."

Bob nodded. "Well, you should understand that 'us people' are very used to being treated like we are freaks. We are either judged as being somehow sinning against some religion, being some kind of domestic violence criminals, sexual deviants or rapists, and somehow worst of all suffering the dirty minded curiosity of small minded voyeurs that get titillated and then turn up their noses. We naturally avoid the limelight. Treat us with respect and you will find we are pretty much normal people, normal people with feelings and pride."

Agent Durant frowned. "It was not my intention to treat any of you with disrespect."

"That is a good start. What is it you need to know from Junie?"

"We need to know how she met this James Conrad, exactly what kinds of things were said to Ms. Thomas, and what kinds of acts they engaged in."

Junie made a distressed squeak.

Bob raised a suspicious brow, "Why?"

"There is some compelling evidence that Samuel Card was in frequent communication with the males that were participating in these online..." Agent Durant seemed to hesitate, for the first time trying to find more appropriate words.

"...Relationship! It was an online relationship. It is sometimes referred to as an LDR or long distance relationship because the two parties involved cannot be together because of distance or other more complicated social barriers." Junie's tone was defensive, but she had found her voice and it seemed her nervous embarrassment was gone for the moment.

Bob gave her an encouraging squeeze. "Good girl, all they need is for you to tell them how it really is."

Junie nodded. "I met James Conrad in a chat room. Do you know what a chat room is?" She had to make a conscience effort not to speak down, like he had been.

Agent Gold spoke up. "Yes, ma'am, it's an online website where people can have real time text conversations."

Junie nodded, "It was a chat room dedicated to people who were interested in talking about bondage. I met him there, his chat name was Spurrs. I did not learn his last name until about a week ago; he just had me call him Sir James. We talked for a while and then we..." Junie took a deep breath. "...we cybered." She raised her eyes up from the table and stared challengingly at the FBI men, "Do you know what that is or do you need me to explain that?"

Agent Gold's eyes never left the laptop that he was furiously typing on. Agent Durant waved his hand dismissively. "Don't care about that kind of stuff. Just want to know details. Was there a time when he seemed to be acting on the orders of someone else? Were there things that seemed out of character or that he was pressured about? Were there words or phrases that seemed repetitive? Those are the things I am looking for."

Junie looked at him askance, "I can't remember every single thing he said to me, every time we talked for the last year."

"Was there a time when he seemed to change?"

Junie paused, leaning against Bob, relaxing and her brow creasing. "It was about three months ago..." Her voice was soft. "Around the time he stopped trying to get me to do things in public. He started getting a lot... um... harsher. He seemed to want to hear me in pain more than... um... well, in pain more. And he started to talk about me playing with other people."

"Play?"

Bob spoke up this time. "Play is slang for engaging in bondage play, with or without sex." Bob's voice took on a bemused tone. "I have always thought it was an odd choice of words. It seems so superficial for something that has such potential for depth of expression and experience."

Agent Durant looked up at him clearly irritated at the digression. "Yes, yes." He looked at Junie. "Go on, you mentioned other people."

"Yes, he talked about finding guys to set me up with, but I wouldn't do that. He would have me pretend that he was someone else. He kept talking like he was someone else, someone he had sent to um... punish me... or um... rape me. But, it was a fantasy thing... role playing."

Detective Durant nodded. "Go on. Did these other persons he spoke about have a name or some identifying characteristics?"

"No, no names. That was the point. I wasn't supposed to know who they were. They were strangers. But they always carried a knife and threatened if I 'did not please them' they would... stab me... um..." Junie's voice faltered and dropped to a whisper. "...in my private parts. He said he would 'fuck my bloody cunt with it'. Those were the words he used every time. He had never talked like that before."

Agent Gold's head jerked up from the laptop. "Bingo."

Junie's voice was soft and full of horror. "The knife he left in my car, it was stabbed through a picture of me, a nude picture. The knife was stabbed right between my legs, through my..." Junie stopped and swallowed.

Agent Gold's voice was both excited and clinical. "It is central to all Samuel Card's murders, the obsession with knives and the ritual mutilation of his victim's genitals."

Junie's hands were shaking so hard that her coffee slopped onto the table as she lifted it to sip. She gagged as she swallowed. "I feel sick. He was going to do that to me. I was so lucky."

Donna spoke up, "Luck, fate, part of what the pattern wills. They all mean the same thing. You were meant to live, perhaps to help end this evil man's actions."

"Is there anything else you need from Junie?" Bob seemed to have had enough of having these men in his house.

Agent Gold looked up. "We will need a formal signed statement about the knife in her car. It will be presented in evidence in the case against him in Oregon. It had his fingerprints on it and there was her DNA on it as well."

Junie's mouth went dry. "He stabbed her?"

Agent Gold looked up from the laptop. His eyes flicked to Agent Durant and then at Bob. "Yes, ma'am."

"Is she all right?"

Agent Durant interrupted, "As a rape victim, her identity has been kept confidential. She was seriously injured. It was a miracle that she survived at all. It will be a long time before she is fully recovered physically. She will carry scars both physical and emotional for the rest of her life."

Junie felt a tear run down her cheek. "Could you tell her I am sorry? Could you tell her... um... thank you for being brave enough to testify against him. Tell her if there is anything I could do to help her..." Her voice trailed off.

As Agent Gold went back to the big black sedan, saying he had a mobile printer set up in the trunk, Agent Durant went back out to the front deck. Junie withdrew into a little flurry of cleaning, almost obsessively wiping the counter and then rearranging some things in the cupboards. Donna watched her with an understanding look on her face, letting her soothe herself with old habits.

Bob followed Agent Durant out to the deck. Both men stood looking at each other for a while. Bob broke the tension, "How long have you been after this guy, this Samuel Card?"

"The first victim we became aware of was a body dumped in a lake in Louisiana seven years ago. There were some pretty unusual knife wounds on the corpse. I knew right then that we were looking at a serial killer. No one else wanted to believe it. They were very sure that the killer was the man she had been having online conversations with. He had been having her role play some scenes that were almost identical to her murder. But he had a rock solid alibi; there was no way he could have done it. Then they tried to find someone else she may have told about the role play stuff, like it was something she was asking for. It took a second victim in New Hampshire two years later, for them to start to take my serial killer theory seriously."

What makes you think that there are more?"

"It's all on their computers. The same stories being played out, over and over again, only with different men all the time. We finally got a break when one of the men admitted he had been getting the ideas from a third man. We tracked the email conversations to a guy, but he was long gone. We only got a rough description of him, age and race, but all the names he used were false. He has always been a step ahead of us. It seems he changes his name, his online pseudonyms, his ISP address, the town he lives in, everything, after each victim. Another trouble is he has gotten better at hiding the bodies. We were hoping that we could get a line on that, but so far nothing."

"Have you learned much from the Conrad guy in Texas?"

"I want to question him personally. This is my case. I was there when they found the first victim. I am headed to Texas next. Agent Gold is from the Seattle office. If Ms. Thomas thinks of anything else she should contact him."

"This James Conrad, he threatened Junie with embarrassment and also with having Samuel Card come and punish her. I am pretty sure that he had no idea what kind of a monster he had gotten tangled up with."

"Yes, that is how it was for all the men. They were all pretty horrified."

"Well you should know that when this Sir James guy threatened Junie, she told Donna and me. We did a little investigating on our own. Junie had his mailing address and we hired a private investigator and found out his name and that he is a Baptist minister. We made it very clear to him that we were not going to let him hurt Junie. We told him we would expose him to his wife and church if he persisted in harassing her. He was very motivated to comply with our suggestions. He even offered to buy Junie a new car to replace her damaged one."

Agent Durant looked sharply at Bob. "I am sure he was really happy about that."

Bob's laugh was humorless. "He was not happy."

The FBI agent turned to look out over the lake. He cleared his throat. "I am just trying to get my head around this. Do you mind if I ask you some questions?"

"I don't have a problem with questions."

"Why do they do it?"

"Why do who do what?"

"Why do these women let men like you mistreat them?"

"You are way over the line with that one. It shows how little you understand about what really is going on. I never have mistreated a woman in my life. I worship women. I count myself lucky to be a part of their existence."

Agent Durant looked at Bob, clearly trying to listen, but at the same time stubbornly holding onto what he knew. "Aren't you their Master?"

Bob began to laugh. The sounds of his amusement rang out across the lake and echoed back of the far hills and came back to them. "Master... I am starting to hate that word. I do not own these women any more than they own me. We have a wonderful symbiotic relationship. They need me. I need them."

"That's the thing that has me the most confused. The way the women seem to be drawn to these guys."

"Now you are getting to the heart of the matter. It is exactly that. Women are drawn to men. Men are drawn to women. It is the nature of our genders. The male and the female are like the poles of magnet. It is the very essence of the male and female to be drawn to one another. Dominants and submissives are polar opposites as well and we are even more powerfully drawn to one another."

"But why the whipping, the humiliation, the violence? It seems the very antithesis of love and trust."

Bob sat down and put his feet up. "It is interesting that you speak of trust. If a submissive gives herself into the hands of a Dominant, it is the absolute epitome of trust. It is a submissive's nature to find fulfillment in the gifts she gives; the service, the respect, the love she shares. Without an outlet for this drive to serve, to submit, a submissive is frustrated. Instinctively she will be drawn to anyone whom she can serve, even to abusive men who will mistreat them."

Agent Durant nodded, "Okay, I get that, but it still does not explain the whips and stuff."

"There are two separate reasons for the infliction of pain. One is simple and biological. Pain and pleasure are closely linked in the human brain, for some more than others. A little or a lot of pain, depending upon the individual, can enhance sexual pleasure immeasurably."

"Yes, I understand. That's the 'M', masochism."

"Well masochism as well as the psychological enjoyment of the idea of pain, humiliation and helplessness. The other reason is the trust. The giving of oneself over to another completely, pushing and testing that limit, surrendering to the will of another. Pain is only a small part of it. It is the rituals of surrendering to the pain, to the will of the Dominant. It is a dance that defies description. All I can say is that the emotional intensity of the bond generated by such rituals is boundless. It is bondage beyond ropes and chains. It is a binding of the very spirits of the Dominant and his submissive."

"Are you a sadist?"

"Do I get sexual enjoyment solely from inflicting pain? Not really. I enjoy looking at women who are aroused. I make sure that what I do arouses the women I am with. That arouses me. I very much thrive on the power and control. When a woman surrenders to me, trusts me. It speaks to me. I am the Dominant around here. Donna calls me the boss dog. This is my territory. Those girls are members of my pack."

Agent Durant shook his head. "It is beyond me."

Bob stood and stretched. "It is that lack of understanding that we face every day. All we ask is that you don't pathologize what you do not understand. It is our life. It is how we need it to be. All we ask is acceptance."

"But it is getting women killed."

"Don't blame the victims. I agree that their need to be subjugated may have made them more vulnerable. But there have been serial killers in the past who killed children because they were vulnerable, or prostitutes, or the elderly. It is the nature of a predator to select the target that fits his pathology. I would be curious to learn about this Samuel Card's past that he chose submissive women as his targets."