Finding My Way Home Ch. 04

After I relaxed back against the couch I looked down at her. "You are a wonderful cocksucker, but I think you need some deep throat training."

Cindy smiled up at me evilly. "Yes, sir. You may use my mouth whenever you desire."

"That's good, because your mother is terrible at sucking cock."

She grinned. "I will try to be the best you've ever had sir."

I grinned. "Okay, enough. I want my girlfriend Cindy back."

Cindy stood up, naked, dripping from her pussy, and flushed over 90% of her body. "Wow, Jon that was wonderful."

"Quite an interesting way of introducing a fantasy."

"Yes, it was, but I was hoping you'd be up for it." She climbed up onto my lap sideways, curling up like a cat.

"I was."

"You're also the only guy I've ever dated who I trusted with handcuffs."

"Thank you."

She looked up at me. "No, thank you. I've had this idea in my head for years and just wanted to try it once. Like I said, I wouldn't trust most guys in that scenario. I always wanted to see what that felt like. I think I liked the light spanking and being controlled for a little while, but it's not something that I want to do often. I'm too much of a wild woman who likes to control sex. What did you think?"

I grinned and said jokingly. "I liked it, but I think I'm more of a straight sex kind of guy. I'm not really a spanking, demanding sort of guy. I like strong woman who I have to wrangle." I gave her an evil grin. "However, you were a very good little slut for me and I think I like that idea."

"Oh, you like strong women, huh? And you liked me being your little slut?"

"Of course -- to both."

"Well, we'll see." She stood up and I also got up. I picked her up in my arms and carried her up to her bedroom. My left arm was working well enough that there was very little discomfort from picking up this little pixie of a woman. She giggled the entire time. I put her in bed and climbed in with her. She smiled and threw her arms around me.

"Mmm. My big, strong lover."

I kissed her and we both turned to relax and get some sleep.

Just as I was dozing off, I heard her whisper to me. "I love you, Jon Kenton." I knew that she thought I was asleep and that I wasn't supposed to hear that, but I did. I tried to determine how I felt about that, and I have to admit that I actually liked the idea of her falling in love with me. Was I in love with her? When I thought about that, for the first time in a long time I didn't see Lily. But I wasn't sure about Cindy. I really liked her, and having sex with her, and she was really fun, but was that love? Was that going to fulfill me? I drifted off, wondering about all these things.

Chapter 13. Buck... and family. Cindy!!

The second week of January 2010 saw Buck in court and we all showed up to provide our testimony. It was a short trial and only took three days. The night before I had to testify I had the dream again. It was getting better each time, but still occurring.

13 January 2010

When it came time for me to testify his lawyer tried a typical ridiculous tactic. The prosecutor, a guy named James Edelmann who liked to be called 'James', had just had me give my version of what happened and then Buck's lawyer, a sleazy guy named Christopher Reuben who didn't seem very good, questioned me.

He tried to make it look like I just barged in and attacked Buck, but it didn't come off very well. I had already testified and been taken through the attack by the prosecutor, so the defense attorney was just trying to poke holes in my story. He was not able to do so and his case was really nothing. The 911 call recording was pretty damning, too. By the close of business on the 14th Buck had been sentenced to 15 years. Lily was overjoyed, but his brother and father were not. They were angry, but kept away from us. I still remember what Lily said though, and kept my eye on them.

The prosecutor was an assistant in the local county office and afterwards he came to me and told me that his boss wanted to talk to me. I met him just outside the courtroom.

"Hello, Jon, my name is Darrin Walker. I'm the DA. Have you got a few minutes?"

"Sure."

He led me downstairs to the small cafeteria in the courthouse and he got a cup of coffee while I got a Diet Pepsi.

"Jon, I'll get right to the point. My assistant tells me that you have recently left the service and have not looked for work yet. Is that correct?"

"That's correct. I have not done anything about that yet. I've been worried about my mother and going to physical therapy for my shoulder."

"How is your mother?"

"She's doing well. She has just finished a round of chemo and the doctors say that she should be fine for many years."

"That's good. Sorry to hear that she had bladder cancer." I could see that he had checked this because I hadn't said what she was receiving treatment for.

"Jon, we are in need of an investigator. We are a small office and have never had one before, but with the explosion of the suburbs this far out from St. Louis, we have a new position that I am authorized to fill. I saw you in the courtroom and I know of your history. You don't have any criminology background, but I believe we can assist with that. Are you at all interested?"

I thought about it for a second. It would keep me here, which was a double-edged sword. I was not as fond of these small towns as some folks, but my mother needed some attention for a while longer and I needed time for physical therapy. "I'm interested. Can I come by later to talk about this?"

"Sure. It was authorized with the new calendar year, but I don't have any other applicants at the moment. It will be available for a little while, but I do have to fill it, so don't wait too long."

"Okay, thanks. I just need to consider what I plan on doing with my future."

"I understand." He handed me his card that he retrieved easily from his jacket pocket. "Just call me when you make up your mind one way or the other."

"I will. And thanks for considering me."

"No problem." He stood and left and I tried to think about where I was trying to take my life. But I couldn't make up my mind right now. I decided to head home and discuss it with my mother.

And, of course, there was Cindy. My relationship with Cindy had been deepening. I was feeling more attached to her and wondered if maybe this was love.

30 January 2010

One Saturday Cindy and I went to a firing range. We took my 9mm and taught her how to assemble, disassemble, clear, load, and fire the weapon. The folks there were very helpful and by the time I was done, Cindy was much more comfortable around it. I just wanted her to be able to handle it and not be afraid of it. Her father had had weapons when she was young, but she never really learned anything about them. It was for the boys, not the girls to learn about firearms in her family. I made her fire about 50 rounds by reloading the magazines and learning how to do everything herself.

After the range, we were at her place and Rhonda was upstairs getting ready for a date. I had just finished cleaning my weapon and laid it on the counter that they had between the kitchen and the small eating area when I brought up the subject that I had been waiting to discuss with her. I decided I had to tell her what I heard that night when she said she loved me after we enacted one of her fantasies. I had been thinking about this for a while and was getting a little attached to her myself. I decided that I had to discuss it.

"Cindy, I have to tell you something."

"Mm-hmm." She sounded a little uninterested.

I sat up a little. "Cindy, I really need to talk to you."

That got her attention. She immediately sat up and her eyes got big. "Okay." She looked scared. "Is it about us?"

"Yes, it is. I wanted to talk about our relationship and where we're going."

She just stared at me. "Okay. I hope nothing's wrong." I could hear the tension in her voice. I knew then that she was definitely getting attached to me.

I didn't want to upset her so I tried to calm her fears. I reached out and took her hand. "No, nothing like that. I think we need to discuss what you said that Friday night before Christmas after our little fantasy romp. I was almost asleep when I heard you say that you love me."

She stared at me and I could see tears forming in her eyes. I was a little shocked that this strong, independent, everyone-else-be-damned woman was getting so emotional. "Okay."

"Well, is it true?"

She looked down at her hands and I saw a tear leak out of her left eye and start to make its way down her cheek. She finally shook herself, wiped her cheek off, and seemed to steel herself for the conversation. When she spoke, her voice was firm and strong; the independent woman was back. "Yes, Jon. It's hard not to love you. You are a good man, a well-mannered man, and a good, considerate lover. I feel a connection with you I haven't felt before. I've never felt like I wanted to be with just one person before, but I do with you."

I watched her. "I see."

"That's all you have to say?"

"I'm sorry, of course not. Cindy, I'm not sure I can define love or what it means to me, but I really enjoy being with you. I don't care if we are eating, drinking, having sex, watching TV, or just reading. All of those things are better with you."

She smiled and another set of tears brimmed. She reached out and took my hand. "I can't believe I fell in love with you so fast. I didn't even want to go out with you at first because I thought you were still hooked on Lily. But you are so easy to fall for. I can't believe that the other women you dated didn't try to nab you."

"Who said they didn't?"

She smiled and wiped her eyes. "Smartass!"

I reached out and pulled her to my chest in a big hug. "Cindy, I'm not ready to say that this is permanent because it's been such a little amount of time, but I really like you. I want to be with you and see what happens. Is that okay for now?"

She looked up at me and rose up to give me a quick kiss. "That's just fine, lover. At least I can say it out loud now, right? I love you, Jon Kenton."

I smiled. "You are a beautiful woman and I'm surprised that nobody has latched onto you, either." I leaned down and kissed her.

We both heard the sniffle from behind us and stopped kissing to turn and find Rhonda standing there grinning with tears brimming in her eyes as well. "You guys are a good couple."

"You heard that?"

"Yes, and it was beautiful. I've never had a guy be that open and honest about things."

I smiled. "It must come from growing up with my mother and then being in the Army. Or it might have been that sophomore girlfriend I had when I was a senior."

"Smartass." Rhonda stuck her tongue out at me and then turned to go upstairs. "Now if you'll excuse me, you lovebirds have caused me to mess up my makeup, so I have to go back and fix it. If my date shows up, let him in and tell him I'll be right down." She scampered upstairs.

Cindy went back to watching TV and snuggled up against me. "Let's just watch this movie for a while."

I was happy with that and kissed her on top of her head. We watched the movie after Rhonda left and until the credits started rolling. Then Cindy attacked me on the couch.

It was about 11pm and we were lounging there, having gotten dressed in case Rhonda returned when the doorbell rang. Cindy looked at me quizzically. "It's late. Who could that be? Did Rhonda forget her key?" She stood up, but as she approached the door, I got a bad feeling and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. It was a feeling that I hadn't felt since Afghanistan. There was something wrong.

"Cindy, wait!" She turned towards me and frowned as she stopped about four feet from the door. I was moving toward the kitchen pass through where I had set down my weapon when the blast occurred. It was deafening, blowing parts of the door inward and knocking me to the floor. I was dazed for a moment by the noise and being knocked down and then looked toward the door. There was a man standing there peering through a hole that had been punched in the door by what had to be a shotgun and Cindy lay on the ground in a bloody heap. I tried to quickly see if she was alive or seriously hurt, but there was no movement. There was still a bit of debris and smoke lingering in the air and the guy didn't see me because I was slightly out of sight behind the couch. My ears were ringing and everything was slightly muffled.

As the man peering through the door withdrew I blinked a couple of times and suddenly the battle environment appeared to me.

The gray rocks came into focus. I could again hear the yelling of my men as they coordinated medical attention to the wounded and returned fire. I had been hit in the shoulder and my platoon sergeant was helping me up but telling me not to stand straight up. The smell of cordite and blood and sweat was back. The gray dust was being kicked up by the bullets thudding into the ground and zinging off the rocks around us. I got up and I could hear him tell the injured and assisting personnel to stay put and fix the enemy in place. He and I were going around the left flank.

The man on the other side of the door stood up and reached inside through the hole to turn the latch for the lock and I leaped to my feet. I had to stop him so that I could get to the wounded. I reached up and grabbed my gun and one of the clips of hollow points that was in the bag where I was also carrying my cleaning kit. I had it loaded and cocked when he opened the door. I took my position and thought nothing of it as I put two into the center of his chest. I could see his eyes come up and focus on me and see what was happening just as I pulled the trigger. He was pushed back through the doorway by the slugs and I heard someone curse and scream. Then one of the elders came into view carrying what looked like a pump shotgun. He was shooting as he came around the corner and I ducked down behind the rocks. I knew he would keep coming, so I crawled forward and poked my gun around the corner of the large rock I was behind, roughly aiming it at where he should be. It was only 15 feet, so I had a good chance. I pumped three rounds in his direction and heard his surprised scream as one found him. I peeked around the corner to see him struggling to try to get up and hold his side where the round had evidently found him. His gun was on the floor and he was reaching for it. I stood up, walked to him and calmly put two rounds into the center of his chest.

I went to tend to the wounded and as I assisted the wounded woman on the ground, I could hear other people outside the door. I jerked around, holding my weapon at the ready and saw nothing but scared civilians.

I blinked and suddenly I was back in Illinois. I looked down at the wounded woman and could see that it was Cindy. I shook my head some more, trying to clear it completely. What the fuck just happened?

Cindy was breathing, but it was labored and her back and side were peppered with the shot from the shotgun. I was still a little confused at the change in scenery, but my military training took over. I could hear the neighbors all milling around outside and looking in, but I was too concerned about Cindy. I cradled her head and tried to comfort her as we waited for the ambulance. I grabbed the blanket that we had been cuddling under on the couch and wrapped it around her tightly, hoping to stem some of the blood flow and keep her warm. I don't know if she heard me or not as I finally told her I loved her and that I would be there when she woke because she appeared to be in shock. She was breathing and had a pulse, but was definitely not recognizing me.

Finally, I heard the sirens, both police and ambulance, but I stayed there with Cindy, holding her, comforting her. By the time they got there, I had the shakes from the adrenalin wearing off. The police arrived first and were quick to ascertain what had happened. They took all the weapons, including my gun and then the ambulance arrived. The paramedics rushed into the room and they loaded Cindy up. I tried to go with them, but the police wouldn't let me leave. They wanted a statement since it was my gun that killed two men. I was angry and fought it, but to no avail. Cindy was whisked away without me. I turned to the younger of the two detectives who had arrived about 15 minutes after the initial police and ambulance. He looked so young I was surprised that he had enough experience to even be a detective.

"Detective, I need to get to the hospital to see how my girlfriend is doing, so what else do you need from me right now? Can't we do this later?" I was in no mood for administrative bullshit.

He looked at me, and his answer was so condescending, I wanted to smack him. "Well, you just killed two men. I think I need to know more about that now, not later."

I stared at him. "My girlfriend was just taken to the hospital with life-threatening injuries. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see what happened here and I already explained it once. In fact, it doesn't even take much of a detective to verify this, so I'm going to head to the hospital. If you want me, you can meet me there and we'll talk all you want."

I started to walk out and he put his hand on my arm. "I didn't dismiss you."

I stopped and stared at him. I jerked my arm away, completely wrapped up in my desire to get to Cindy. "Unless you are going to arrest me, I'm leaving. I'll see you at the hospital."

I waited for him to say something about arresting me, but he didn't. I saw him look over to an older detective who was also in plain clothes and talking to a couple of neighbors, checking their statements even thought they were mostly being gathered by the uniformed officers. The older detective came up to us. "Mr. Kenton, I'll take you to the hospital. We'll get there faster."

I nodded. "Thank you." I glared at the younger one.

We got into an unmarked police car and he turned on the siren and we headed down the road at high speeds. He spoke to me as he drove. "You're the Jon Kenton who was in the paper last year about a battle in Afghanistan?"

"Yes." Oh, great, I thought. He was going to ask about that -- but he didn't.

"My name is Detective John Wilson. Will you answer some basic questions without a lawyer?"

I thought about that. I would answer until I felt threatened. "Sure."

"How long have you had that 9mm?"

"I bought it late last year."

"You have your FOID, right?"

"Absolutely."

"How did you happen to have the gun with you? You know Illinois doesn't have a carry and conceal law."

"I took Cindy to the range today so that she could learn to shoot it, too. We went back to her place where I showed her how to clean it. Who knew that several hours later some assholes would show up? Just pure dumb luck that we aren't both dead."

He thought about that for a second. "I believe you. And we can verify that you were at the range very easily. I'm sure you'll be cleared. Those two have a record of violent actions and have been arrested for it before. I also know that you put Buck in jail, so it's obvious what their motive was."

This guy had obviously done this many times. "Thanks."

It was just a few minutes later we arrived at the hospital. Cindy was in emergency surgery and the detective stayed with me. He called back and told the other officers that he was with me and then sat with me as we ate terrible junk food from a machine and waited... and waited... and waited. About an hour later a very distressed Rhonda showed up. She was in tears and I held her, trying not to cry, but feeling her sobbing in my arms made it hard for me to hold mine back. I was still trying to tell her that we were hopeful, but the longer Cindy was in surgery, the worse I felt.