First Punishment

Hubby kissed the top of my head and walked me to the corner of the room, as he began to position me where he wanted, reached in the waistband of my sweats and pulled them down and off of me completely. (I don't ever wear panties, so I was naked from the waste down) he sighed lightly and cleared his throat…

"You're forgiven Baby doll, where going to get through this together. Now stand here and think about what brought us to this moment and remember, I love you too, you're my life."

I realized at that moment he had stuck me nose first in the corner. I swear to you, throughout all this turmoil and mess I've created my first thought was….He just put me in the damn corner. We don't even do this in play, he's really serious about this. Then in that instant I realized, so was I.

Let me tell you about standing in the corner, knowing you have done something terribly wrong and hurtful to the most important person in the world to you and realizing that in a few minutes that same person is going to inflict a true punishment that is going to hurt, a lot. Fear, the thought of jumping out of the window, anger, every emotion you can have that is negative starts to run through your mind and overpower your sole until sooner or later you are basically forced to stand there and endure what seems like a lifetime of nothing but going over and over and over again the terrible thing you had done that put you there in the first place. To say the least, it really isn't a good feeling.

I guess hubby had been watching me because once I truly believed I deserved whatever he was going to give me and resigned myself to the reality of what was about to happen, my body relaxed a bit and I heard him moving around behind me. In this low, stern and almost harsh voice..

"Come here and stand in front of me."

I jumped at first from the sound in the quiet of the room and trembled just a bit as I heard the tone in his voice, my throat is dry again and now there are like 10,000 butterflies running around in my stomach. I felt like I was going to wet myself as I turned around afraid to look at his face and very slowly walk to the couch where he's sitting. In a much quieter yet very stern voice…

"Look at me."

I take a deep breath bracing myself for the sad and disappointed look I know I'm going to see and look him right the eyes. Yep, I was right, the tears started flowing the second I saw those usually smiling and sparkly blue eyes. He looks tired and sad and my heart aches for both of us at that moment. My natural instincts want to take over. I want to hug him and kiss him tenderly and tell him everything is ok and make him feel good again but I know better, I know it won't be good or right until we both get passed this. The tears keep flowing but I stand there quietly, waiting patiently for his next words.

He doesn't say anything just looks into my eyes almost reading my thoughts and gently but with a firm grip takes my left wrist and moves me to his right side. I felt like I was in a dream, we never lost eye contact until he gently glided me over his lap. My stomach flipped about 20 times in that moment and I jumped like 10 feet when I felt his hand on my bare bottom.

Now remember, it's not like we have never done this part before, this is a natural thing for us, this is what we do for play almost every night. So why in the world am I having such a difficult time?

This is real, the feelings, the emotions, the reality of all of this is powerful and very frightening, we are both feeling them and in a way having to experience something new separately yet together. I feel remorse, regret, fear and a ton of guilt, while he's feeling sadness, disappointment, protective and determined to teach the one person he loves more in this world a lesson he should never have to teach. This is not play acting, or fun or even sexual by a long shot, this is real and it's painful and what makes it so hard is its necessary. Neither of us are looking forward to the next step but ready or not….

"SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK"

Six hard and heavy swats slap down on my bare and very cold behind in different places stinging my entire backside in the course of about Six seconds. I jump and squirm and kick my legs as they land one after the other, He grabs my waist tighter and leans forward and begins to really pepper my rear end with fast stingy smacks from his hand.

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

By this time I'm really kicking and trying to get off his lap and screaming…

"no no please that really hurts, it's too much, it's too much. I'm sorry, I really am."

The tears are now flowing even harder burning my eyes as my ass stings and burns like never before. My heart aches and the remorse and guilt rush to the surface of my being.

Quietly yet with that harsh determined voice

"This is supposed to hurt, it's going to get much worse before we're through."

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack

He finally stopped smacking my now very sore bottom and begins to rub it just a little, I feel him reach over and then I feel cold soft wood on my bottom. I know it's that paddle and my whole body tenses. I feel him push me forward so that he can place his leg over mine and grab me even tighter to his body and then…

CRACK CRACK

I jump and scream…

"oooh please don't use the paddle, please sweetheart, I'm begging you, I can't take that please."

CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK

By now I'm a sobbing mess on his lap, still fighting for all it's worth and not succeeding in moving more than an inch either way. I'm beating the floor with my fists trying hard to accept this pain. He stops for a moment and rubs my bottom…

"Am I getting through to you yet Babe?"

I practically scream

"Yes Sir!"

I was totally shocked as was hubby I'm sure but right at that moment, it felt right. I have only ever used that term when we are playing and I'm in character.

He raised his arm and I cried….

"Pleeeease????"

CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK

CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK

CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK

CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK

I heard the paddle hit the floor and felt his hands one rubbing my burning bottom and the other massaging my shoulders as I sob over his lap repeating over and over again how sorry I am.

After about ten minutes or so and my sobs have turned to quiet hiccups hubby slowly releases my waist and removes his leg from over my legs, clears his throat and in a quiet and still sad voice…

"Get up sweetheart, I want to you to go lie over the desk and grab onto the other side."

I get off his lap and in total disbelief look at him and begin to protest when he places a hand over my mouth.

"Shhh, remember Baby doll, until I say you have learned your lesson."

I begin to cry again and hang my head as I walk to the desk and place my very sore and achy body over the top.

As I lay over the top of the desk trembling from the chill in the room, the massive stinging in my rear end and the overwhelming emotions that are filling the air with a sad form of tension. I try to bury my face in my crossed arms. I'm crying softly and wishing beyond hope Hubby will have a change of heart and come over and hold me tightly.

Not yet, I wasn't getting out of this that easily.

I can hear Hubby shift in his seat as he takes in a deep breath.

"Well, was it worth it?" Do you really think that stunt you pulled last night was worth all of this today?

I lay there and listen to his words spoken with a great deal of emotion and just a hint of anger mixed with fear. I was shocked, I hadn't given any thought to the fact that Hubby was really scared of what I had done. I knew he was pissed off, he detests drugs of any kind. I knew he was hurt that I lied to him. I knew he was disappointed with me for the terrible decision I had made, but I never dreamt he was scared and I wasn't sure at what. I turned my head to look in his direction and whispered.

"Why do you have fear in your voice? What's going on honey?

He shot up off the couch like a cannon and came over to my face, knelt down until we were eye level and took another deep breath before practically hissing at me…

"You were out in a strange neighborhood at almost 11:00 at night, ALONE! and sitting in a dark parking lot at a seedy convenient store rolling and smoking a JOINT full of a drug you have no idea where it actually came from or what was in it! And you have the nerve to ask me why I sound frightened?!?!?! You could have been mugged, raped or even KILLED! I had no idea where you were and if I hadn't of called I may never have found you. What if your cell phone was dead? Or better yet, you forgot it at home like you usually do. I can't even begin to describe to you the hundreds of scenarios that could have taken place. All of which could have led to the worst outcome possible. I love you Baby doll, I'll be damned if I'm going to lose you for something that can be prevented.

(I think this would be a good time to let you all know, Hubby is a Paramedic, has been for 27 yrs. and has seen it all. He has had nightmares from some of the tragedies and horrible acts of human kind on the streets at night. For him to react this harshly is not only warranted but extremely justified.)

His face was beginning to flush and I can see his neck twitching and I realized I should have kept my big mouth shut. He pulls himself up and straightens his clothes, wipes his brow and regroups while he gets his composure back to normal. He walks to the table by the couch and picks up the leather strap.

This is one of my favorite toys when used right. It's about 14 inches long and 3 inches wide, made of soft pliable leather on one side and stiff harder leather on the other. By right I mean, after a nice long and rewarding warm up with lots of kisses and rubs in all the right places. Then slowly and ever so lightly one strike at a time continually increasing the speed and swing of the leather until I'm squirming and purring and so hot and wet I can't take anymore. Now, under those circumstances I can take that strap pretty fast and hard after a while and there have been many a night I have slept on my belly due to the welts and bruises it has left.

I looked at the strap in his hand and looked at Hubby, his posture and demeanor both saying one thing; this is serious business and there will be no loving and tingly warm up first. I was truly frightened at the sight of the strap and the realization of this situation; I did the only thing I could think to do at a time like this. CRY! Of course I wasn't just lying there stoically crying, the fear and adrenaline that accompanied that fear had me jump upright off the top of the desk and backing up toward the wall beside it. Hubby, bless his heart…he looked at me and I guess he realized just how scared I was and knew I was already hurting both physically and emotionally so he stood there holding that blasted strap in his hands and stared at me waiting patiently. After about two minutes of me sniffling and crying softly and his heavy breathing I finally couldn't take the silence and taste of that fear any longer.

While crying softly and choking back the sobs.

"Honey, please, don't you think I've learned my lesson?

He stood there for about 10 seconds looking at me, almost like he was considering it or something, not quite sure, but I did see the softness creep back into his face and the love in his eyes, the sadness seemed to be dissipating and then in the blink of an eye he went right back to that almost harsh and determined demeanor and as he spoke the tone even more determined.

"When you're ready to continue, you can place yourself back over the desk. I've already told you twice, this punishment is over when I say it's over. We can stand here all day Baby doll or we can get this over with and put it all behind us. The decision is entirely up to you. I for one would be a lot happier holding you in my arms."

Sighhhhhhhh Damn my ass hurts, ok miss smarty pants, you did this to yourself, finish this, he's not going to kill you, you can take this.

Tears falling from my eyes, I take a few labored breaths and walk very slowly back to the front of the desk and place myself over, leaning forward and grabbing onto the drawers on the other side, I know my ass is red and blotchy, I can feel it and I know it's sticking straight up in the air directly in front of that damn strap.

Once he's sure I'm in place he walks over to my left side and gently runs his fingers down my bottom to my thighs, gently opens my legs until they are about 6 inches apart from one another and then I hear him take a breath as I hold my own.

SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT

Two fast and hard white lines of fire land on the under curve of my ass just where my thighs meet and I scream…..

"OWWWWWWWWW Ooooooh Ouch, Ouch, SHIT that hurrrrrts! Oh God baby please not so hard!

SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT

Two more in the exact same areas. Then before I'm able to register that pain and scream my breath is literally taken away…

SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT

SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT

Six more fast and harsh over both the center of my thighs, I begin to kick and squirm rolling over on each side trying desperately to fan some air to the burning pain that's radiating through my legs…..Tears flooding the surface of the desk.

"NOOOOOOOO, please, please, please honey, I'm sorry I'm sooooo sorry, please stop, pleaseeeease??!!!"

Not a word spoken by Hubby, I hear him move to my right side and again his arm raises and I grab onto the edge of the drawer handles as hard as I can trying to brace myself…..

SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT SWOOOSH…SPLATTTT

Twelve more just as hard and fast as the first ten from the very top of my ass all the way to the bottom of my thighs, I can feel the welts forming as the white burning pain turns to a dull throb and I absolutely loose it and jump off the desk, crying and jumping up and down trying for all it's worth to cool off the burning sting that's radiating from behind.

Hubby drops the strap and calmly walks to me, wraps me up in his arms and holds me close to him while I sob and bawl like a baby, gently rubbing my bottom with his hand…

"Shhh, Shhh, it's almost over Baby doll, you're doing really well and I'm proud of you for allowing me to help you."

He pulls back so he can lift my chin and look me in the eyes, he gently kisses my nose and tucks the stray hairs that always seem to be falling into my eyes behind my ears.

"Shhhh, ok now, lets finish this."

I gasp and pull back from him…

"Fffinish this? (New fresh tears streaming down my eyes as my legs tremble and my body shakes.)

"Yes Baby doll, six with the cane and I think this lesson will be over with and we can put this all behind us and move forward."

Holding my face in his hands and kissing me gently on the lips.

"When you're ready, let me know."

I look deep into his eyes and can see this is killing him as much as it is me. I take a step back and really look at him. He's drawn and breathing hard like he's trying to keep his composure and someone inside him is fighting him tooth and nail. He's like a warrior doing battle. It's not a pleasant sight to see at any time, but when you know that battle is the direct cause of something you did it makes it a thousand times harder to look at. I decide to hurry this up for his sake now more than my own. I hold my head up, straighten my back and wipe the tears from my eyes, walk back to the desk and bend over the front edge, making sure to stick my hips out so that my bottom is at a sufficient height for him and then I wait. The fear now replaced with sheer determination to see this through and get to the other side with him so we can move forward together. I hear him move behind me and know he's holding the cane. I close my eyes tightly and try with all my might not to tense my bottom as the first strike of the cane bites like a shark into my tender and throbbing backside.

SWOOOOSH…..CRACK

The cane landed on the center of my right cheek and I felt the thud then the worst of it follows behind and a line of fire shoots to my very core. I can't help it, I jump up and start screaming grabbing my bottom and quickly letting go because it hurts too much to touch.

"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeooooooow!!! Oh God no no no no no no I can't take this, Oh God no. Please honey, please no more."

Hubby gently moves forward and placing a hand on my back guides me to the desk and helps lean me forward, not saying a word he raises the cane again and…

SWOOOOSH…..CRACK SWOOOOSH…..CRACK

Two more one following the other left cheek then back to my right cheek just under the first line of fire. The pain is almost unbearable and I fall to my chest on the desk, a sobbing mess. I don't plead anymore or even try to fight it, I'm worn out and sore and my heart can't take anymore. I lay there crying…

"Please, just finish this, Please Sweetheart."

I bury my face in my arms and force myself to lay there and not move…

SWOOOOSH…..CRACK

Another line of fire across my left cheek just under the first then before I can react…

SWOOOOSH…..CRACK SWOOOOSH…..CRACK

The last two just under my cheeks first the right then the left and I hear the sound of something crack. I try to catch my breath and turn my head to him standing behind me with tears flowing down his cheeks holding two pieces of the cane in each of his hands. I try to get up to go to him but I'm stiff and my legs are still too shaky.

"Oh God! Honey please come to me, I can't move, I need to feel you, please hold me."

He rushes to my side and very gently helps me off the desk and picks me up, he walks us to the couch and sits down as I curl myself in his lap, hugging him for all it's worth.

"I love you Sweetheart, I'm so sorry I caused all of this. I swear to you, never again. I'll never give you a need to punish me again. Do you forgive me?"

He's rubbing my back and hair, choking back the tears and kisses me on top of my head.

"Baby doll, I forgave you before it even happened. I'm sorry I was so hard on you, you understand why, don't you?"

I pull back and look up into his beautiful blue eyes and attempt to smile at him through all the tears.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."