Getting Beyond Stale

"I think we are getting stale." That assessment was offered by Julia Franklin, one of the four wives sitting on her patio and enjoying a pitcher of margaritas on a late spring afternoon.

"Is that a personal statement or a broad statement covering all of us?" Tina Atwater asked in response.

"Well. it is mostly personal but I think it might also apply to all of us."

Tina looked over the rim of her glass and responded, "Explain."

"Last night, Jim took you to dinner, probably Italian and then you went to a movie for your Friday date night. Right?"

"Yes, and Greg took you for Mexican food and then to a concert in the park." Julia nodded. "So?"

"How many weeks in a row have you had Italian and a movie on your date night?" Julia continued. "And Brenda and Bob had burgers and bowling and Maggie and Derek went to the ball game and ate ballpark food. And today, the four guys are watching the game and we are sitting on the patio talking about whatever. It sounds like the weekend is already planned in advance as a carbon copy of last week and the week before."

Brenda spoke for the first time. "You make it sound like we lead the most boring and predictable lives in town."

Julia responded, "I don't mean it to sound quite that bad. I mean I was sitting in the concert last night listening to music that wasn't that interesting and almost wishing that was bowling with you guys or at the ball game with Maggie and Derek. Don't get me wrong, I love and enjoy being with my husband but I sometimes feel like we are in a rut."

Brenda responded, "OK, I can relate to that. There are times when I really don't feel like a burger or bowling. I go because Bob enjoys it so much. But yes, a change would be nice once in a while. Maggie, as usual you are being quiet. What do you think?"

"I think I agree with both of you. I like to go to the ballgame but not every Friday. It would be nice to something different. Derek gets the season tickets almost every week so we kind of feel obligated to go. But I would like to go to a concert once in a while or do something different."

Tina spoke up, "The next time you don't want to go, let me know. I'll go with Derek."

Brenda asked, "Would you really go out with Derek? I mean even to a ballgame."

Tina thought for a minute and said, "Yes, I would. He is a great guy and is always a gentleman. So I would go out with him as long as Maggie didn't object."

Brenda looked at Maggie and asked, "Would you object to Tina going to a game with Derek?"

"Honestly, I don't think it would bother me. I know Derek and I know Tina. I trust them together. Of course, it would be better if I was going to a movie with Jim. But that isn't critical."

Julia reentered the discussion, "So if Derek went on a date with Tina, it wouldn't bother you?"

Maggie replied, "No, I don't think so. What would you think about Greg and I going to a concert together if you were going bowling with Bob and Brenda was going with Jim to a movie or something like that?"

Julia thought for a minute, "I see what you are saying. As long as it was just between us and and....."

"Come on and what?"

"Well, I was just thinking that if we did something like that, I would want some closure to the evening like we all get together at the end of the evening for a drink or dessert or something so that we could all see that everything was still cool. I would hate for there to be secrets building between us."

Maggie replied, "I can understand that and it makes a lot of sense." Tina and Brenda agreed. Then Julia went into the house and made another pitcher of margaritas. When she returned, the conversation had drifted to things that they would like to do and some local gossip.

The day ended around 9:00 after they had grilled chicken and steaks and the eight of them had enjoyed a typical Saturday night together.

The four couples were very similar. All were between 28 and 32. All had professional jobs and were making decent salaries. They had all been married between 6 and 8 years and had not yet had any children. The women ranged from the petite Tina at 5'2" to Maggie's elegant 5'8" and all were attractive and personable. The guys were between 5'10" and 6'2" and generally had upbeat outlooks on life. They had met and become close after each of them had bought a house in the suburban cul de sac where they lived. Everyone got along well with everyone else.

On Tuesday morning each man found an envelope personally addressed to him on his car's winshield. Each took the envelope and waited until work to open it. Each woman had a package waiting for her when she arrived at her job. When they opened it, each one too found an envelope personally addressed to her. The first call was made by Tina at 9:30.

She called Brenda and said, "Hey Brenda, did you get an envelope when you got to work this morning?"

"Yes, I just opened the website and looked at it. Have you looked yet?"

"No, I called you first."

"Look at it and meet me for lunch. I'll call Maggie and Julia."

"OK."

Tina opened the website and found a screen titled Neighborhood Excitement with eight blocks with eight names, one of which was hers. The letter instructed her to log in with an unfamiliar user name and password. She did as asked and found a screen with the following message:

"Good morning Tina. I am sure that this is as much of a surprise and mystery to you as it will be to the others. Please don't be overly concerned. This is the first step to see just how serious every one of us was about the discussion we had on Saturday afternoon. Everyone does seem to have fallen in a rut. So in an attempt to do something about that, I am going to propose a plan similar to what was discussed on Saturday. I am sure that you will be hearing from one or more of the girls soon. I suggest that you get together and discuss it with them and then log back in. There will be a new screen at that time that will explain things further. Have a good morning."

There was no further screen to go to. The only option was to log out. She called Brenda again.

"I opened the website. This is strange. Should we be scared?"

"I don't think so. It has to have been done by one of us; we just don't know who. Maggie and Julia will meet us at the diner at 12:30. Can you be there?"

"You bet."

Tina didn't get a lot of work done that morning; her mind kept going over their discussion on Saturday. She was surprised that she felt a little excitement along with a certain apprehension about the concept of going on a date with someone other than her husband. She wondered how the other girls were feeling. Then a phone call came in and she was tied up for over an hour trying to straighten out a client's account.

All four women arrived at the diner at about the same time and quickly ordered a sandwich and salad.

"OK, I've been thinking. This has to have been set up by one of the four of us. No one else knew what we talked about." Julia started.

"Well I mentioned it to Jim Saturday night. We teased each other about dating one of our friends." Tina said.

"And I did the same with Bob." Brenda added.

"Well I didn't say anything to Greg, but I'll bet you dollars to donuts that he and Jim talked about it when they played golf on Sunday so that means that Derek heard about it too. So I guess the perpetrator could be one of the eight of us. I just have a feeling that it is one of the four of us though."

"Well it isn't me." Tina said. "It would take me a week to set up a website and I'd probably have to have Brenda help me."

Brenda nodded and added, "I wish that it had been me. I think that this is incredibly unique and might be fun. But I didn't do it."

Everyone turned to Maggie, the least talkative of the four. "Don't look at me. Derek and I went to his parents after he got back from playing golf. And I was in Denver all day yesterday. So Julia, the finger points at you."

"Don't look at me. I manage our company website but I don't know how to create one. We pay a geek to do the computer work. I just manage the content. So one of us is lying or it is one of the guys."

Brenda spoke up, "Frankly, what does it matter? Someone has taken the things we talked about and is trying to do something with it. This could be fun or it could be a real mess. I think that it might be fun. So the only question is do we want to play and see what comes up or do we want to say no?"

Maggie said, "I agree with Brenda. We all thought it might be a good idea if there were certain boundaries and limits set. If whoever set this up paid attention to those, it might be fun at least for awhile."

Julia and Tina looked at each other and smiled. Then Tina said, "OK, we are in. So what do we do next?"

Brenda said, "I guess we eat our lunch and go back and log in again and see what the next screen says."

The others agreed and ate their lunch. Then each hurried back to their office to see what was next. Each woman returned to her computer and immediately logged in. This time, the previous message included a new last line which read, "If you have decided to not continue, press 'Thank you but no;' if you have decided to continue, press 'continue.'" All four clicked on the 'Continue' button and were greeted with a new screen which read. "Thanks for accepting this challenge without too much problem. There is no intent to ruin anyone's marriage or anything like that. This is an attempt to put a little excitement and perhaps a little mystery into our lives. The basic structure is that each week the four guys will submit an idea or two for a Friday night date. These will be sent to you but the 'who' will be anonymous. You will rank each date in priority order and return it to me. I will pair up the couples and let you know the details. You might not get your first priority date depending on how many girls pick the same date as number one. It is possible that your date will be with your husband. For now, all I am going to say is that this and the following screens are for you to complete personally without discussion with the other girls or your husband. The information will remain private. But before we go forward, I will need all eight of us to agree to what has been said so far. Click on 'Continue' if you want to continue. I will wait until 5:00 and if I do not have all eight agreements by then, I will no longer pursue this as I will assume someone has gotten cold feet. If we all don't agree, then it won't work. Please make your choice as soon as possible."

The four girls clicked on continue but nothing happened. They left the screen open but minimized it and waited to see what would happen. Then they continued with the work of the day but nervously checked almost hourly to see if anything had changed. Finally at 4:30, the screen changed and they each eagerly clicked on the "Next" button.

It read, "We now have consensus. Thank you. The following screens are simple questions or choices to find your personal preferences. Please fill them out honestly. I would hate to set someone up on a date to eat sushi when you hate raw seafood. There are six screens but they shouldn't take too long to complete. I would also ask that you don't discuss the answers with any of the others including your spouse. That will help ensure that there will be a little mystery in the process. Thanks. After I have processed these, I will be posting a personal message to each of you but it will probably be tomorrow. Enjoy and have fun with this."

Each person went through the screens and answered the questions. The toughest one was when they had to rank their preference of prospective dates in order. In each case, their spouse was not on the list, only the other three. When each one finally sent their responses, they were greeted with a message that said to not plan anything for lunch tomorrow as they would be meeting with others to discuss several issues. Everyone closed down their computer for this night and left to go home. But everyone also felt a sense of excitement of the unexpected in the air.

The next morning, all eight eagerly logged in and were greeted by a message that told them to meet others at a particular restaurant and discuss the issues on the next page. They should print the issues out and read them over and come to some conclusion and be prepared to discuss it at lunch. Each one was surprised at the subjects but quickly understood the importance of each one. As a result the morning went quickly and they made their way to their appointed lunch spot to meet up with the others.

Maggie arrived first but was quickly met by Brenda and shortly Jim and Greg appeared.

Maggie started, "Hi guys. I guess that this is our group and our spouses are meeting somewhere else. My message said that I am to take notes and send them back when we are through."

Greg said. "I haven't talked to Julia and only with the other guys the other day. What do you two think? Is this on the level or what?"

Brenda replied, "Nothing so far has made me feel suspicious. It just seems like someone is trying to break us out of our ruts and have a little fun."

Greg continued, "That's what I think too but I can't help shaking the feeling that one of us knows a whole lot about a lot of things right now and if they were turned against us, it might be embarrassing."

Jim nodded. "I don't know if you were asked the same questions that we were, but I sure wouldn't want Tina to know how I ranked the three of you as prospective dates. I would never hear the end of that."

Maggie said, "I appreciate your concern but I think that all of us are in the same boat. We all agreed to go along this far with things and Tina had to rank the guys too. So that is hanging over her head. I think that this might be fun if we don't get caught up in what it could turn into. If it ever goes south, we can always just stop responding."

Jim replied, "I know that you are right but I would still like to know who is behind it."

Brenda replied, "We went around that question the other day. I think that it is one of the girls but no one has fessed up or acted out of place. So we kind of decided to just trust each other and see where it leads."

Greg responded, "That is what I decided also. Like Maggie says, we can just stop responding if things go where we don't want them to. Let's order and then take a look at these questions." They all agreed and placed their orders.

Maggie started with the first issue, "Should the date be open or not? Meaning should we all get together and then each couple leave on their date or should each couple meet separately away from home and not reveal who they were with?"

After a few minutes of discussion, they agreed that meeting away from home would be better and also would allow things to be a little mysterious. Maggie made note of their answer.

"OK, second issue, we all kiss each other good night when we are together. Is a kiss good night acceptable in private with your date?" The discussion was a little more varied on this subject but in the end, they agreed that a kiss good night was acceptable.

"Third issue, it is expected that the evening will begin between 6-7:00 with dinner and will end before midnight with a get together for drinks or coffee at one house at midnight. Does this present any problems?" The discussion here focused on specific events that might end earlier or later than the time frame but in general the proposal was acceptable to everyone.

"Fourth and last issue, is a fifty miles radius from our houses a reasonable limit to go on a date?" They discussed what would be inside the limit and what might be outside the limit. In the end, everyone felt that fifty miles included plenty of opportunities.

"My note also said that there would be additional opportunities to refine or rework these issues as time goes on and we get more comfortable with the whole process. So, is everyone satisfied with what we decided?"

Everyone agreed that they could agree with what they decided. They finished their meals and returned to the office.

Maggie sat down and opened her screen and entered the information and sent the reply. Then she went to work on her next document for work.

Julia had been designated as the responder for her lunch group and she entered her answers. Her group had been pretty easy and didn't seem to have too many concerns about where this might lead. They all thought that it would be fun.

At 4:00 a new message popped up and she read it eagerly. "Well folks, I think everyone likes this idea. Everyone agreed on all of the ground rule issues. Go to the next page and read the ground rules so far. Gentlemen, this is short notice, but reply with two suggestions for possible dates this Friday night along with suggested dress. Ladies, I will send you your choices after I receive the guy's responses. You will have to reply by tomorrow morning. Then before you leave work all of you will know what you are doing Friday night but not who you will be with."

Julia felt a sudden thrill of excitement. This was really going to happen, two days from now. She would be going on a date with one of the three guys. She quickly opened the next screen and read the rules.

Ground Rules for Friday Night Dates

1.Dates will be within a fifty miles radius of the house.

2.Each man will submit three date suggestion in order of preference and suggested dress (two for this week).

3.Each woman will reply with her preference no later than Thursday by the end of work.

4.Friday before noon, each person will be notified of their date and dress preferences and his or her meeting place.

5.In the event that someone is traveling or will not be available, alternate provisions will be discussed. Please advise problems at the earliest possible time.

6.The man would normally pay for a date with his wife; he will be expected to pay for the evening with his date.

7.A kiss good night is acceptable and probably expected.

8.After each date, you will have a report sheet to complete. You should report the things that went well as well as those that didn't. If you found that something didn't work very well, offer a suggestion how that can be avoided in the future. There will be more questions also. Please reply to that by Saturday morning before the information fades in your memory.

9.Unless otherwise indicated, the start time will be 6:00 and all couples will be at the designated meeting place before midnight.

10.Should any problem arise that might cause someone to be late, call the designated hostess with information.

Remember, we are all looking for a fun evening, not an evening of being groped or fondled. If this occurs, the whole thing is probably in jeopardy. Have fun.

Julia sat back and grinned to herself. "This was going to be a hoot," she said to herself. When she got home, she quickly logged in to see if there was any further update. There wasn't. She resigned herself to check first thing in the morning before she left for work. Then she set about preparing dinner for herself and Greg.

At 9:30 she decided to check again and surprisingly, there was an urgent message. "I must not have had my head on straight. It appears that the dress designations are too vague and that Friday is too late to notify people since we will all be at work. Ladies, have your husband log in and update their suggested dress with more details. I will have your choices posted before midnight. Check them and reply before you leave for work in the morning. I will reply as soon as you respond so you can take the appropriate dress with you to work."

Julia logged out and called Greg. "Honey, a small problem cropped up. Log in and fix the problem. I'll go to the living room."

Greg came out fifteen minutes later and said, "I guess she was right. Casual, Day Dress, and Evening Wear were too vague. So how do you think that will change things?"