Grace Release: First WoundsbyLittleOne14385©
Cold rain splashed again my face and into my eyes as I ran, blending in with hot tears as they soaked my face. My lungs burned and felt as if they would burst but still I refused to stop running. Every sound behind me morphed into the sound of hurried footsteps following me, and that alone forced me to surge on. I had no idea where I was or where I was going but I could only think that I had to get away, no matter what the cost. My legs eventually slowed to a jog then to a staggering walk as my feet stumbled over one another until I lost the battle and collapsed in a heap as sobs I'd withheld wracked my body. I looked around the deserted streets and saw no help to be found. My phone and purse were gone and I had no idea where I was, how would I get home? Did I want to go home? If they had my purse then....what if they were waiting for me when I got there?!
I began to hyperventilate which only made ribs ache where I'd been kicked. I was sure I'd broken a rib or two. My eyes finally landed on my saving Grace, a nearby pay phone booth. After negotiating with my body for more strength, I forced myself to my feet and stumbled into the small enclosure. Without the rain pouring down over me, I began to shiver under my heavy soaked sweatshirt and jeans. I dug in my pockets and located two quarters, and after praying a silent prayer of thanks for the two coins I slipped them into the coin slot. Knowing that this was my only chance, I tried unsuccessfully to get my hands to stop shaking and pressed the correct numbers on the keypad. When the line began to ring, I tried to force a few deep breaths through my nose but only tasted blood. So I resorted to inhaling through my mouth and holding the air in my lungs as the line picked up. Then the familiar voice came on the lines, "Hello?"
Suddenly emotion threatened to overtake me but I swallowed it down and attempted my usual carefree greeting. "Um, hi..." It didn't come out nearly as confident or care free as I'd hoped and he picked up on it immediately, damn his perceptiveness. "Hey Hun, what's wrong?" I wracked my brain for how best to answer his question and in that moment I lost the composure I'd fought so hard to maintain. Sobs wracked my body again and I could sense his angst rising. "Grace, hun, I need you to talk to me. What's wrong? Where are you, this isn't your number. Please talk to me, you're scaring me." I gripped the phone for dear life and decided to keep it simple for now even though those words alone were a struggle to force out between sobs. "I'm at a payphone. I had to run away, they...oh my God, they...oh God!!" I was losing all sense of reason very quickly.
"Okay hun, take a breath for me. I'll come get you, where are you?" I took a shaky breath like he asked and took a hurried look around, confirming that I still didn't recognize anything around me. "I don't know I don't recognize anything around me." I could feel panic rising in my chest.
"It's going to be okay, we'll figure this out. Can you set the phone down and look at the closest street sign for me? If you see an intersection nearby, tell the name of both streets okay?"
"Okay," I agreed, "Just don't hang up okay??"
"I'm not going anywhere Grace; just go get those names for me okay?"
"Okay, I'm setting the phone down now." Carefully I placed the phone on the metal tray almost afraid that it would hang itself up, and when I was confident that it wouldn't I ran out into the rain again. There was no intersection to be found but I did see a stop sign not far away. I glanced back at the phone booth and hurried toward the sign until I could see the sign indicating the name of the street which sat on top of it. Repeating the name to myself I scrambled back to the booth, fighting with the door and grabbing the phone once again.
"Hello? Hello, Damian, are you still there? Hello?"
"Yea hun, I'm still with you, it's okay I'm here. Now what was the name of the streets?"
"Um, there's not a light that I can see but I see a stop sign, the street name said Anderson Avenue?"
"Okay now we're getting somewhere, what businesses do you see around you?"
I turned in a circle in the booth looking around, "Okay, I see a Barnes & Noble's book store and a Jack in the Box, and a Starbucks."
"Got it, I know where you are. Stay there, don't move, I'll be there in about ten minutes."
"Hey wait! Please don't hang up!" Fresh tears spilled down over my cheeks and more panic ensued. I couldn't bear the thought of being all alone in the darkness of the vacant street again; even for a short while.
I could hear by the winded tone of his voice that he was in a hurry, "Okay hun, I'll stay on with you as long as the pay phone will let us. Do you have any more money to put into it?" I frantically searched my pockets to no avail, having each one come up empty. When I answered the fear began to rise in my voice as the pay phone operator announced only one minute remaining. "Oh God Damian, one minute left..."
"It will be okay hun, I'm on my way. I'll be there...." Without warning his voice was gone and I was alone. The darkness began to creep in around me and every small movement around me was menacing. The phone began to reverberate with the busy line tone and without even hanging it up I turned and walked back into the rain sitting against the outside of the booth. As I sat waiting, a steady stream of tears streaked my cheeks as I attempted to steel myself against the elements.
As I sat with the rain pouring down over me my mind began to rehash the nightmare I'd just endured. Immediately I was assaulted by a tidal wave of memories. The dread, the helplessness, and the pain; through all of it I couldn't escape. I could hear my own voice, sobbing and begging for mercy to no avail. Through my tears I could hear their laughter and my body was again overwhelmed with sensations that filled my throat with bile again. As I was assaulted with a fresh wave of pain I began to cry out.
"Grace! Shit, Grace, what the hell happened?"
His words only echoed in my ears as the concern in them only mounted further. Although I could see his face before mine, my eyes refused to fully recognize him. I had fallen numb and no amount of screaming from the inside of my mind would force a response from my lips. I felt his arms slip beneath my knees and behind my shoulders before lifting me from the sidewalk. Pain flashed throughout my body yet only a single whimper escaped causing him to hug my body tighter again him.
He quickly deposited me into the passenger seat of his car and once he had me safely strapped in he closed me inside and jogged around to the driver side, sliding into his own seat. During the drive, the only thing I could seem to do was stare out the window at the view whizzing past me. In the blur of the images, my mind was continually assaulted by images from the previous hours. Hot tears streamed my cheeks as I relived one moment after another. I was startled back to the present as his hand slipped over mind and his thumb continued to lightly graze edge of my palm.
As we approached the familiar red wooden door of the third house on Third Avenue, my fear outweighed even the familiarity of the house. I had been to this home on a number of occasions, each one on such a brighter occasion that I struggled with the wisdom in my decision to call him tonight. What exactly did I expect to say? What could I say to explain to him what all had just occurred? He silently pulled the car into the driveway then climbed out rushed to my side of the car to help me out. He didn't even question me, but silently slipped his arms under my knees and shoulders, once more pulling me to him.
Once inside, he carried me straight into the bedroom which I had always claimed and set me gently down onto the bed. Assessing me quickly he turned to walk away and panic threatened to overtake me. I grabbed his wrists firmly and finally my subconscious words could be heard, "No!" My words startled him and he turned back to me, placing his hand over mine at his wrist.
"I was just going to step out for a second to call the paramedics to get you some help."
This was something I hadn't even considered, and the words of my attackers came back to haunt me.
"No! Please no, they'll find me and they'll kill me please no..." Tears overwhelmed me again and he very quickly seceded.
"Okay Grace, sweetie, okay. Just breathe for me. I need to get some first aid supplies together. If you won't let me take you for help I need to find out just how badly you're hurt and clean you up a bit. Do you trust me?"
Even while I sat shaking like a leaf; I still nodded without a thought. I trusted him with my life. While I sat waiting, hot tears fell in a steady stream down cheeks, blending with the chilled rain water that still beaded on my skin. I closed my eyes trying to force my mind to focus only the sounds I heard coming from the bathroom but when they opened again the scene around me had changed. I found myself entangled in the sheets of my bed, the fabric clinging to my clammy skin. I lifted my head to find that my tears had soaked my pillow. I sat up, having to convince my mind to realize that by body was no longer in danger but still the fear lingered. I sat up, breathing deeply through my nose and decided it was probably best that I get out of bed for a bit.
It had been nearly three months since Damian had come to pick me up that night and still the nightmares continued every night without fail. I disentangled my body from the sheet which was no easy feat considering the cold sweat I'd awakened in. After climbing down from the high bed frame, I padded quietly into the kitchen as I had every single night only to find him already seated at the table eating a bowl of cereal. I couldn't help but smile a bit when I recognized that he already had set a place for me with my own bowl of cereal waiting. He looked up and smiled warmly, "Bad dreams again?"
I nodded carefully and sat down across from him in comfortable silence. He had quickly learned that conversation didn't come quickly during these late nights. He continued to eat, watching me unobtrusively until I sat back, my bowl empty. Only then did he speak.
"Was it the same dream again?"
I nodded again, "Yes, it's always the same."
"Would you like to talk about it?"
I shook my head this time; knowing that I was still not ready to bring the memories of that night into words. He nodded and his eyes searched mine, and when I finally forced myself to look I found not condemnation or pity there like I feared. I found warmth and understanding. It felt almost as if he were looking down inside of me to the very depths of my soul and I had to look away, ashamed by what I thought he would find. He moved his bowl from in front of him and leaned forward onto his elbows his expression still warm but also very intensely trained on my face.
"Gracie, honey, we have been a part of each other's lives for a very long time, haven't we?"
I could feel that the question was loaded but I played along. "Yes, we have, for quite a number of years now."
"And we know each other in very intimate detail, don't we?"
When I paused to think about our many conversations and experiences over the years and I could feel my cheeks heat, "You're very right, we pretty know all there is about one another I'd say."
He chuckled softly, "Well there is still yet to be learned. In all of our years as friends have we every talked more in depth about what it is that I do?"
This caused me to stop and consider, "Well I know that you're a teacher. You teach history right?"
His eyes danced, "That is true, but my question wasn't in regard to my work. It was more in regard to my extracurricular activities in fact. Did we ever explore those together?"
My mind was swimming as I tried to follow his line of questioning. Where was he leading me here? "We've talked about a number of those, of course you love your gaming and there's always your golf. To be honest I know these are not what you're referring to but I'm having a hard time following you. What is it that you're implying here?"
"Well in addition to those hobbies that you already know, there is a side of me that you've never really known."
A knot began to form in the pit of my stomach and everything on the inside of me told me to run, although I knew that he would never hurt me. "I'm sorry I guess I don't understand. You're not going to murder me maliciously, chop me up in pieces, and hide me inside the walls or bury me in the backyard, are you?" He paused long enough to make me wonder and I swallowed heavily, "...are you?"
He laughed out loud, "No Grace, that's not my thing, but I would like to share that part of myself with you. In fact I think that it would be beneficial for both of us."
To break the heat of his gaze on me, I stood quickly and carried our bowls to the sink rinsing them with more effort than what was really needed. "Okay, so lay it on me, what is this big secret? You know that you have my curiosity peaked."
His eyes were practically sparkling with promise. "Well Gracie, I am a Dominant. "
While I had heard the term before I decide it'd be wise to ask for more information, "What exactly does that mean?"
I could feel the heat of his gaze burning into my back as he answered. "It means that enjoy having control. It pleases me to be in control of all that is around me, and it pleases me even more to have someone who is made happy by giving me that control over them as well."
The bowl slipped from my fingers and clattered loudly into the sink. I quickly retrieved it and made an exuberant effort in washing it thoroughly, afraid to even think about meeting his gaze now. I inhaled deeply and after mustering all of my courage I turned and faced him. "So what do you mean by giving you control exactly?"
He considered thoughtfully for a moment before cancelling, "Well, it means that someone gives me control of what they do and the choices that they make."
My tongue felt as if it was made of lead, I took a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water from the sink. Putting the glass to my lips I gulped the water down greedily. Once I was done my stomach was full and I felt waterlogged. I remembered then where I'd heard that term before. "Wait, do you mean you're one of those people who love leather, whips, and chains? Who love to hurt people?"
He chuckled deeply again, "Yes, Gracie, I do but it's not what the media has made it out to be. It's an exercise in trust."
His answer took me by surprise. "What do you mean trust? I don't understand."
"Well a relationship such as that requires that the one relinquishing control has a certain amount of trust in the one that they are giving that control to. They have to trust them without reservation and know that the Dominant will never push them beyond their limits or do anything to harm them."
The earnest plea behind his words compelled me to look up into his eyes. When I answered, my voice was just above a whisper. "Damian, why are you telling me this, what is it that you want from me?"
"It's because I want you to be that girl Grace, I want to be your Dominant."
Even though in the back of my mind I almost anticipated his answer it still stole the breath from my lungs, leaving my head spinning. He wants to control me? Why? Why now, after all this time? I realized after a few minutes that none of these questions had made it onto my tongue and he still sat waiting for my response. I realized that my knees were made of jelly and I really need to sit down. Carefully, I made my way back to my chair and sat down heavily. "I don't understand Damian, why me, and why now after all this time?"
"Oh Gracie," be grinned like a Cheshire cat, "I've wanted to tell you this for awhile. I want to make you a part of this life with me but it's just never been the right time. Now that you're here and you're struggling over this whole mess, I want to take that struggle from you; to help you get through it so you can heal."
Fresh tears pricked at the back of my eyes and I fought the lump building in my throat. He had always been the one to support me through the struggles in my life and now I was seeing him in a brand new light. He felt like my knight in black leather if you will. His voice brought me out of my inner montage.
"Will you let me show you, Grace?"
His question was pregnant with possibilities and I had to admit I was intrigued. There had always been something comfortable and familiar about him, and to see this brand new side would help me get to know so much more about it, but was I ready? Could I handle it? Would he be disappointed in me if I couldn't? Questions crowded my mind until he cleared his throat and I realized that he was yet again waiting on my answer.
I proceeded with caution, "I want to try."
A warm smile filled his face and stood, pulling me up to stand with him. Before he could go any further I placed my hand on his chest to stop him. "Wait, I do want to try, but I need you to know that I may be able to do it. I may fail or disappoint you and that does scare me." I stared at the floor forcing the tears that threatened again to the back of my mind making my eyes burned from the effort.
He cupped my face in his palms and he pulled my chin up until I met his gaze, "The fact that you are willing to try means that you could never disappoint me. You're new at this so we'll go slowly. If you ever get to a point that you feel that you aren't comfortable with anything at all we will talk about it and if you don't want to continue we won't. I know that this will help both of us in dealing with this."
I could only nod and the second that I did he leaned in and pulled my face to his, kissing me deeply. For so many years I only knew him as my best friend, never getting to know this side of him and this totally surprised me. The care free friend had melted away and given way to this masculine pillar of a man who exuded control. I had to admit, it was a huge turn on.
At first he nibbled gently on my lip, nipping lightly along my jaw to my find my ear lobe. His fingers threaded through my hair pulled my head to the side giving him more access to the soft flesh there. The firm tug pulled on something deep inside of me, willing me to follow him. At that moment the sensations left me more than a willing participant. His mouth nibbled along the side of my neck and down to find it's prize in the tender place at that base of my neck and he sucked heavily eliciting an uncontrolled gasp to escape my lips. He pulled away only long enough to whisper, "Good girl." He found my lips once more then covered my mouth with his. He tasted of the subtle sweetness of Apple Jacks cereal and I tentative teased him by running the tip of my tongue along the top of his. He moaned his approval into my mouth and in response he kissed me so deeply that I literally got dizzy. Then suddenly his mouth was gone and I was left gasping and feeling thoroughly kissed.
When he met my eyes again his were bright with excitement, "Yes, you will definitely do well." He took my hand and led me into his bedroom. His grip on my hand was firm and I found that it was extremely comforting, even through my nerves and not knowing what to expect from him. As soon as we stood in the darkness of his room, he quickly turned on the lamp near his bedside but dimmed to a soft glow.
Starting with my shoulders, he ran his hands down along my arms and into both hands. His eyes sparked with an idea and he changed tactics. Instead, he gripped the hem of my and looked at me, and spoke softly. "Arms up." Without thought I pushed my arms straight in the air, causing him to smile. "Good girl." He then tugged my shirt upward over my torso, breasts, and torso leaving them exposed and continuing upward until it only covered my wrists.