Having Fun with Dycke and Payne Ch. 07

Bob and Fiona were not enemies: they were male and female, polar opposites, left brain, right brain. Each needed the other and each wanted the other, but the fight for who had primacy, had so far threatened even the possibility of an intimate relationship.

Bob now had to show his feminine side, but he did not know if he had one. It had taken everything he had to survive while he was in Russia, between the chemical treatments, the days in cold water, the days without rest, and the weeks without food. Softness was something left for other people. That was why he could not understand what this woman was doing to his brain. This had not happened to him since he had been debriefed at 'the Farm' and mustered out of the service.

Bob stopped. He sat up and moved to the top of the bed. He removed the headset, the silk mask, and the mouthpiece. He uncuffed Fiona and said, "We have to talk."

Fiona looked at him, stunned, too surprised by his abrupt end to their games to hold onto thoughts of getting even, for the moment. She asked him "Are you all right, Bob?"

"No, and that is what I want to you talk to you about."

Fiona said, "Can we talk in the shower? I am a little messy right now."

Bob replied, "If I go with you into the shower, I may forget what I want to talk about. So you go shower and I will meet you here."

Fiona was in and out of the shower before Bob had even finished putting his toys away. She was sitting on the bed naked, waiting for him, when he returned from the kitchen.

He looked at her and said, "Did you use water?"

"Do I look like a cat to you?"

Bob looked at her and said, "You can use your tongue on me, anytime."

Fiona said, "Okay, Bob. What is the problem and how do we fix it?"

"Fiona, you messed me up. Since I was put out to pasture, I have been free as a bird. While I was a guest of the Russians, my net worth increased five hundred fold. When I was released and got back home, I had two years back salary plus interest waiting for me; plus sick leave, vacation time, personal days and all the other things that go with our type of employment. My government gave me a six figure mustering out bonus for giving the other side verifiable codes that they used to infiltrate our mainframe. Of course, they didn't know they were getting misleading information and we were piggy-backing their transmissions back to their computers and taking whatever we could from them. The government is going to be paying me for the rest of my life so I could sit on my duff and do nothing, if I so desire. I did not have a care in the world, until I met you."

Bob took a deep breath and continued, "I have no clue why, but from the moment I met you at school, you monopolize my every waking moment and I dream about you every night. What I did to you tonight, is what I do to every girl I bring home. I make love; no, I have sex with a warm body. I relieve a physical need. I almost made it tonight with you, but I was not having a good time. With the others, I could apply much more pressure, bring much more pain to bear, use my whips, clamps, braces and benches. I could not do that with you. The very simple answer to all my internal and external fighting is, I think thatI am in love with you,and for the life of me, I do not know when it happened or why. I would love for you to stay here with me and help me figure out my feelings for you, but I have a feeling you are going to get dressed now and run away from the crazy person who has lied to you about making you dinner and tied you up and took delicious photos of his artwork and then confessed that even though the loony bin says he is okay to play with other people, he only wants to play with you."

Fiona looked at Bob, dumbstruck! Just a short time ago, she had listed all the reasons she did not want to get involved with him. She decided to enumerate them.

She said, "Bob, I am a very direct person, so here are the problems I see with my getting involved with you:

First, you are too old. I like younger men.

Second, you are short. I like tall men.

Third, you are thin. I like muscular men.

Fourth, you are aggressive. I like to be in charge.

Fifth, you keep trying to put me in my place. You do not have the right to determine what my "place" is. No tiny American ex-spy, is going to tell me when to jump and how high, no matter how rich or how right he is, especially, if it is aHE."

Bob laughed and then he asked, "So, are you leaving or not?"

Fiona laughed, "No, Bob, I am not. I have three days off, and something in my head is going on, also. I believe it has to do with a more hostile intent than love, but if you want to talk, we can talk. I also owe you some gratuitous sex, because you beat me, technically, two add of three times."

"Fiona, I release you from your obligation to have sex with me tonight and offer you the opportunity for a rematch on the third bout, at a time that is mutually agreeable."

"I accept that Bob. However, there is no sense in screwing up my entire weekend. So why don't we have sex as mutually consenting adults and just have fun?"

Bob laughed and said, "I can live with that."

Fiona said, "You may not be able to say that on Monday, Bob!"

It was very late Thursday evening when Bob hopped into bed with Fiona. When he left for school on Monday morning, he had a distinct limp to the right, a swollen jaw, three bruised ribs, numerous love bites on his neck, and a smile and that would have lit up the city of Charleston. Who says love does not hurt?

33. "In love, lust, or both."

Fiona checked in with security on her way back to the Schneider household and received the day's code words. When she opened the front door, Marti was there to greet her and said, "By the looks of you, I guess you lost?"

Fiona said, "Good morning, Marti. Anything earth shattering, that I need to know about, immediately?"

Marti answered, "Not only that, you got laid and you are in love."

Fiona retorted, "I am not! I just met the guy and he is a great fuck. Do not go around mistaking lust for love."

Marti laughed and said, "Fiona, I knew you before Geoffrey popped your cherry. So do not tell me that I do not know the difference between you getting laid and you being in love."

"Marti, I cannot be in love, I have only met this guy twice."

"So, why did you wind up spending the weekend with him?"

"Two out of three falls and I lost."

Marti said, "Girl, let me make some coffee and tell me all about it. Maybe my hormones will stir up, again."

"You may want to add something stronger to the coffee, Marti. I am about to tell you things about this guy, that are going to get your knickers into a bunch."

Dycke walked into the kitchen and said, "Welcome back, Fiona. Did you leave Coach Short in one piece?"

Fiona said, "How did you know about that?"

Dycke laughed and said, "I am the boss and the boss knows everything!"

Fiona said, "Oh shit!" She lowered her head into her hands, because damage control was now impossible. She felt someone hit her on the back of her head, lightly. She looked up and saw Dycke running out of the kitchen.

Dycke's stopped, turned, and said, "Young woman, you will not use that word in my presence."

Fiona and Marti laughed and waited for the coffee to brew, so that they could continue with their conversation. By the time the conversation really got going, every warm body in the Schneider household was involved. At ten o'clock, Chad called in to work and said he might not be in at all today because he was having too much fun.

Two uniformed police officers brought a handcuffed Bob Short to the Schneider residence at eleven thirty. They asked Bacillica if this was the person who had held her employee, against her will, for three days, in the nude, blindfolded and in handcuffs.

Bacillica called Fiona to the door to identify the perpetrator. When she saw Bob standing there, she started laughing. She said to him, "How does it feel, stud?"

The two police officers broke into laughter and Bob finally realized that he was the butt end of a well-played joke.

Bob said, "I will get you for this, Fiona!"

"Fiona had nothing to do this coach."

Bob asked "Who said that?"

"I did," said Dycke.

"I wonder if I call Duke and told them that I lied about your paperwork, if they would believe me?"

"Not a chance, coach. I received the acceptance paperwork Saturday."

"Will someone please get me out of these handcuffs?"

"Come on, coach, from what I have learned this morning, you were a big time spy. You should be able to take them off, by yourself," Dycke said.

"Fiona, didn't you say that this young man needed training in self-defense? I am an expert in three forms of martial arts and I have a receipt stating I have to donate my time to train him. I can begin immediately, if you would like."

"Thank you, coach, but I think I will decline that offer and free you from your obligations. I prefer to be trained by someone who does not want to kill me." Dycke said.

Fiona said, "Bob, I think it is a wonderful idea. He knows that we are seeing each other and has been teasing me about it most of this morning. This will give us the chance to be together more often and I can protect my charge, while you beat him to within an inch of his life. Then, in lesson number two, you can really get tough on him.

Dycke said, "Oh, sugar!" He, immediately, got slapped on the back of his head, by his father, mother, Fiona and Marti.

Dycke yelled, "What did I do wrong? What did I say wrong?"

His father responded, "We all knew what you were thinking!"

Dycke said, "If I am in trouble, while thinking around you guys, I am really in trouble when I am near Payne!"

The entire group burst into laughter and adjourned to the den. They explained to Bob how much his life had changed, since this morning. His wedding was planned and his honeymoon destination picked. He was allowed twenty civilian guests and one hundred on his sealed list. If he had any friends on the other side, he would like to come over, arrangements could be made for their transportation. He and Fiona were supposed to have the requisite 2 or 3 children. However, after consulting with Fiona about his performance this past weekend, and considering his advanced age, it was decided that four children would be best, for his cardiovascular health.

Bob looked at Fiona and said, "They are not kidding, are they?"

Fiona looked at him and said, "Do you remember what you said to me Friday night; that it made no sense to you, at all? Your mind could not focus on anything but me. Asleep or awake, there I was causing confusion, destroying your normal flow of activity. Well, Bob. I have never been so angry at anyone, for so long, for no reason, at all, as I have been, at you.Every time I think of you, I get angry. Every time Dycke speaks about you, I get angry. The only time I am not angry at you, is when I am with you, and when I am with you, I am happy. Away from you, I hear your name I am angry! With you, I am happy! Someone is telling me something. And this morning, Marti, who is known me, since I was fourteen, had to remind me what I was like, when I was going through puberty. If you want me, even though I know your'Short'comings, I know where we can get a deal on my ring.

Bob looked at her and said, "I am going to have to think about this. I am going to have to call my shrink and get his approval. I will talk to you later." He stood up, kissed her on the forehead and walked towards the front door.

Dycke got up and walked with his coach. As they got out of sight of the others, the coach said, "Fiona said she knew where I could get a deal on a ring. I suspect that had to be through you, am I correct?"

"Correct coach. How fast would you like it?"

"I wanted to ring last Thursday, Dycke, but I did not know how to ask her or to even bring up the subject."

"I can get you one for this evening, coach, but it will take some trickery. We have to find out what type of stone she likes, what type setting she likes, and what her ring size is. After that, it is easy."

"How much is this going to cost me, Dycke?"

"How badly are you going to beat me up, while you are training me, coach?"

"I am going to hurt you bad enough, that when you are attacked, you can beat the shit out of anyone."

"Coach, I am going to get you a great deal! Meet me at Napoli's restaurant in one hour. I'll have the plane ready, we are going to Atlanta."

In the next few minutes, Dycke had his computer wizard alert the flight crew for immediate departure to Atlanta, email Desiree that she had sprained her ankle and needed someone to relieve her before Steve got out of class. Dycke told Marti he wanted her to take him to Mr. Temple's office. Everything went off like clockwork, leaving Fiona with little time to mull over what had happened with Bob. As soon as Fiona was on her way to relieve Desiree, Dycke asked Marti about Fiona's tastes in rings.

Marti said, "Her ring size is seven, white gold or platinum and anything but square."

Dycke's said, "Marti get dressed. We are going to Atlanta, to buy our girl a ring."

"He has not made up his mind yet, Dycke!"

"He wanted the ring, before everyone started pressuring her into asking him. He wants her more than air, couldn't you see that? Bob feels about Fiona the same way I feel about Payne. I feel sorry for him, Marti, I really do."

"You should count your blessings that Payne is not standing behind you right now," Marti said.

"If Payne was anywhere within fifty yards of me, I would not have said a word."

Gary got the call from Amsterdam he was waiting for, and gave Dycke the information he needed for his trip to Atlanta. Dycke and Marti were out the door moments later. They picked up Bob at the restaurant and continued on to the airport where the aircraft was ready for departure.

They landed just north of Atlanta at a small airport with very little air traffic and a very easy drive to their destination. Once there, Marti took Bob by the arm and said, "Don't worry, big guy, I have got you covered."

All five foot three inches of Bob Short could not help but laugh as he looked up at the six foot one inch tree that was Marti. When Marti patted him on his head, like a little child, he said to her, "If you do not stop that I am going to bite you on your kneecap." They were both laughing as Dycke led them into the bowels of the diamond store. Dycke spoke with the owner and with the gemologist and told them both what he expected and what they would get from him in exchange without going through the normal bidding process in the Netherlands. Both men seemed genuinely excited by the prospect of getting diamonds directly from the source.

The gemologist laid out three trays of diamonds before Bob. None was less than five carats, nor more than ten. Bob was looking at a little more than thirty-one million dollars in those sixty-four stones and his eyes were blinded by their brilliance. He was handed a pair of gloves, so he could pick up and look at each one, individually. His eyes move left and right over each tray. However, his eye kept coming back to one particular gem. Bob picked it up, looked at it, turned it over and over in his hands and then placed it on a piece of black felt and asked the owner how much it was.

The owner took the stone to the electronic scale to weigh it and it came out to 6.05 carats. He then asked what type of setting Bob would like the stone placed in.

Bob looked at Marti, who simply, stood there, and then at Dycke, begging for help with his eyes. Dycke turned to the gemologist and asked for his opinion.

The gentleman took out abook that showed the type of stone that Bob had picked in many different settings; both alone and surrounded by other smaller stones. He made suggestions to Bob, and made his personal preference known, but left the final decision up to Bob.

Bob's eye was again drawn to one particular setting and pointed to it. The owner asked what size was the ring finger and Bob said, "Seven."

The gemologist said, "I will be back in one hour," as he took all the diamonds back to the safe and one diamond and the book to the work area.

The owner said, "Would anyone like some refreshments?" No one responded.

Bob asked again, "How much was this going to cost?"

The owner reiterated that the cost was still unknown, but it would be finalized, shortly.

A little over an hour later, Bob was handed a sealed, clear acrylic box, with a black ring box inside of it.

The owner said, "Now for the part, I love the most. Mister Short, if you would follow me, please."

For the next five minutes, Bob Short was given a lecture on diamonds. While doing so, he was signing papers without reading them, as most men do, when they are totally confused and out of their depth. He could have been signing his own death warrant, and would not have known it. At the end of it all, the owner asked, "How would you like to pay, sir, cash, check, or charge?"

Bob asked again, "How much do I owe you?"

The owner replied, "The first payment is for the GIA certification on the ring and the first year's insurance. It is a one-time charge of four thousand six hundred and seventy-five dollars. The jewels are laser engraved. If anyone tries to sell them, they can be traced directly back to you."

Bob took out a check from his wallet and made it out for the amount, signed it and gave it to the owner.

The man said "Thank you. The second check you will pay to Mr. Schneider, directly, because it is his diamond you have purchased."

Bob whipped his head around and looked at Dycke, who, meekly, raised his hand and waved. Dycke gave Bob a handwritten bill of sale that stated, "One wedding present for two dear friends in exchange for one hundred dollars and martial arts training for a lifetime, as long as I do not get hurt badly."

Bob looked at Dycke and did not know what to say except "Thank you."

Dycke said "Now we have to figure out a romantic way for you to give the ring to Fiona."

The three rode in the car, in silence, on the way to the aircraft. As they entered it, the engines roared to life and they were in the air in moments. Dycke called his mother to see if she had any ideas for Bob to sneak up on Fiona, and give her the ring. Basilica said, "I would tell Bob not to make it easy on her. She said that he did not win that third match fairly. If she wants the ring, she has to fight that third match for it, and she has to win it. Either that or Bob has the right to return it to the store. However, this will not be a private match; everyone will be there rooting for their favorite person."

Dycke's said, "Mom, I love you, but you are evil!"

Bacillica said, "Ask Bob what he thinks?"

Bob answered, saying, "You are evil, and I like it."

Bacillica said, "Can I set it up at your gym for Friday night?"

"Ten o'clock, Friday night should be perfect for everyone involved."

"Dycke, I am going to hang up now and start making phone calls, I will see you when you get home."

Dycke said, "Okay, mom, I want to make a few phone calls, also."

The thing about having the computer surveillance specialist on the security team, Gary, in the Schneider house playing with his computers, was that he heard all, saw all, and reacted to everything before one told him to. So when Bacillica went to tell him the happenings for Friday evening, Gary had already sent out the e-mails to everyone involved, forbidding them to say anything to Fiona about thenuptial matchup. All Bacillica had to do was call the Temples.

As the aircraft rolled out on landing at Charleston, Bob started laughing hysterically. Dycke and Marti looked at him, with curiosity, but Bob could not stop laughing. Dycke, finally, asked Bob. "What was so funny?"