He Promised Not to Break Me

"Turn around now," he prompted.

"Vanya stop, not that, really I can't--"

"Listen, I tried to do this last night but it was dark and you were out. I know it hurts, but I have to check there's no muscle damage or need for stitches. I... I don't want any real harm to come to you. It's difficult to hold back when I'm... inside of you."

"But Vanya it hurts!"

"Would it be different if I told you to do it, if I ordered you to stay still and let me in?"

I turned around and tried to think about the earnestness in his voice. He'd said it was all right, that he wouldn't fuck me. As his finger went in I doubled over in pain. He took his time probing my ass. I don't think it was as innocent or as detached from our earlier roles as he tried to convince himself and me. He'd linger to massage a spot in my rectum and go on despite my convulsions and pleas. He spread my hole with his fingers again and again, insisting it was to check if it would shrink back again as it should. A time or two I thought I heard a satisfied grunt as I cried out in pain. Neither was I as unmoved by his treatment as I'd like to think. I kept moaning and my head filled up from the endless well of my shameful nasty dreams.

After he finished my thorough anal examination he turned me around again, hands on my hips. There came blood with his fingers from both my holes but not enough for it to be serious. He started to rinse my pussy again, his face leaning very close. I felt his breath on me. The water stream lowered and lowered as his face touched my mound and he nuzzled it sighing, rubbing his face on me. He put the shower head on the floor and used his free hands to part my lips. I was hurting but the more excited I got the less I took notice of the aching and burning. "Oh jesus," I moaned when his tongue rested itself on my clit. I was afraid of the pain I'd be in with orgasmic convulsions but it was more important right then to have him touch me.

He ran his tongue up and down my slit. He parted my lips with his hands and licked teasing circles around my clit without actually touching it. I pleaded for him not to tease me.

"What do you want baby?"

"Please don't stop. Let me cum."

He let out an aroused growl and sucked my clit between his lips squeezing gently. I moaned in pleasure as he rolled his tongue over my clit sideways in a rhythmic motion. He alternated between fast and slow, gentle and fierce, pressing harder and flicking lightly. I leaned my buttocks on the sink and focused all my thoughts on what his mouth was doing.

He hummed while pressing his face against me. The vibrations lifted me so close to an orgasm I stood rigid, holding my breath, waiting for the final surge to send a raging whirlwind of sparks through me. Keeping pressure on my clit with his finger he said quickly, "I should put another pill in you. Want me to do it now?"

I moaned something resembling, "Yeah." I was too aroused to think. He fumbled the pill from a little cup on the sink, put his finger on my pussy and his lips back on my clit. I felt his finger start sliding in, hurting me. His touch had made me wet again. His tongue returned on me and he hummed against my mound. The pain radiated from his inwards pushing finger and I shouted out a howl of fulfilment as I came. My juices bathed his hand. In the throws of my climax I felt a finger on my anus. Vanya carefully deposited a painkiller in there too. It hurt badly, but it had been the pain, pain he'd given me, that made me cum. His finger slowly slid out of me. I shuddered and he stood up just in time to support me as I sagged against his chest, exhausted.

He walked me to the bed. Sitting down I braced myself for the pain. I thought, that during our time in the bathroom, I'd have had time to adjust to it, but it was as fresh as ever. I wailed until I was on my back, my weight off my pussy and ass. I lay there recovering from my orgasm wondering what Vanya was doing.

"Close your eyes," I heard him say, voice suddenly stern. He didn't sound like he had a surprise for me - a surprise I'd like that is. Apparently he'd decided that if I was ready to come, I'd be ready to be used again.

"Vanya I really hurt," my voice sounded panicked, scared. "Please. I haven't even started to heal yet. You promised you wouldn't, please don't hurt me."

"I said close your eyes душенька. I won't ask nicely again." I closed my eyes and heard him walking to me.

He blindfolded me. A hand slid on my thigh "Spread 'em." I started crying and begging him. I curled myself as much in to a ball as I could with my bruised insides. Vanya wasn't happy. He gagged me and dragged me to the center of the bed, rolled me on my back and yanked my thighs apart. "I take you when ever I feel like it," he growled menacingly in Russian. "Understand?" He let my legs fall on either side of him and spread them further by uncaringly pulling them wider. He had a plastic syringe which he used to fill first my cunt and them my rectum with the anesthetic gel. Going in, the unyielding plastic tool scratched the membranes that were raw to begin with. I cringed but only a little whine got through my gag.

He sat between my legs looking at my exposed crotch and getting more and more aroused. He started fucking my ass with a finger, rougher than earlier in the bathroom. "You're ass is slippery baby, you're making me so hard I'll soon have to take you again - hurt or not. I think I'd choose your butt. There is something so deprived in pumping you up the rectum, enjoying your sobs and screams." He smacked my pussy hard to punish me for trying to get away from his finger. He pushed in and out, adding another finger and relishing my jerks of pain. "But, if I was to fuck your cunt, I could fill your arse up with a pretty plug and make you feel all nice and full." I felt cool heavy silicone resting against my thigh. What the hell, did he go shopping for that too?

This time Vanya had gagged me with duct tape instead of a rag. I could make no sound but a stifled nasal whine. Nonetheless I tried to scream for him to stop.

"Relax душенька. It won't hurt too bad. I want the gel to stay in, don't I. I wouldn't want you to be in pain." He tried to fake a loving tone, but couldn't hide the sadistic lust beneath. I was afraid to be gagged like this. Unlike a rag, I couldn't breathe through duct tape. What if I start to cry and snivel? If my nose fills up with snot will I suffocate?

I felt something on my anus pressing to enter. To make sure I'd keep still, Vanya put weight on his palm resting between my naval and my mound. He pinned my hips down pressing on my gut, exactly where the pain was. He pushed the plug through my sphincter giving me no chance to adjust. It hurt, but it hadn't been excruciating. His hand held me still and the invading plug continued to burrow deeper. It stretched the cuts he'd just opened up again in the bathroom. I thrashed and tried to escape. I wasn't tied down, but with him it didn't matter. I would never escape from beneath his large frame.

The plug had bulges on it from smaller to bigger and my hole got stretched in increasingly excruciating pain for four more times. When Vanya got to the third and fourth ball he stopped to pull them back out and repeated my painful stretch, relishing in my pain. The last was the worst: the big bump meant to keep the plug in me, no matter how I'd spasm or push. I couldn't scream, but I could cry and I did. This kind of pain would have been maddening at any time, but after my anus tortured bloody not twelve hours past, the agony was unthinkable. Vanya please, you promised you wouldn't break me. He pushed in slowly, making me feel it. My little hole struggled to give way. I had no way of knowing how much more was yet to come, how much wider he'd force me.

Vanya stopped, the widest part of the last ball spreading my opening obscenely. "You want me to take it out baby?" I nodded my head and kept nodding in desperation. I couldn't plead with my eyes or my voice, but he could see I wanted it out. He saw I was in pain. "Ok, we'll see what your ass wants." While I was nodding, Vanya had pushed the plug in just a few millimetres further. Being past the ball's equator my muscles started contracting. As my tight ring struggled to shrink back, it travelled down the plugs surface, eagerly sucking it in.

I cried and sobbed uncontrollably as it dawned on me how my own body had betrayed me. I had never felt more humiliated. Not this. I'm filthy, I'm filthy, I'm bad. He manipulated my helpless body to make it seem my tortured butt was begging him for more abuse. My body complies with him despite my will. He really does own me.

"Oh, your greedy ass is loving it. Can you feel it filling you, my lovely little slut?" The pain stopped getting worse. The plug sat snug in my rectum, where my own tortured body had sucked it in.

Vanya let me close my legs. The plug felt strange inside me. The mattress heaved as he got up from the bed. His weight returned and moved on top of me, straddling my chest and arms. He stroked my nose, my only source of air.

"Take a deep breath."

I knew what he would do and sucked hungrily until he clamped my nose shut. I panicked instantaneously. If he's a killer this is it. But he can't be. He wanted to take care of me. He washed me, he held me. Could he suffocate me? I tried to wrench my head free but he was too strong. I need to breathe. I tried to throw him off me but he was too heavy. Will he kill me? Did he say душенька? I couldn't remember. I need air. I can't remember. I got to breathe.

He let go and I sucked in air and snot through my nostrils. He let me breathe for a minute and put a finger on my nose again. I fill my lungs, and the minute I stop sucking air he squeezes my nose shut. He didn't say it. I was sure. Why won't he talk to me? My lungs burned. I need to see his face. I don't want to die like this. I tried to breathe through the duct tape though I knew I couldn't. Will he really kill me? If I could just see his face I'd know. I need to breathe. I thrashed desperately but he was too heavy to shift or to get my hands free. I need air. Please let me breathe.

Thankfully he let go of my nose before I blacked out. He repeated this about seven times. I'm not sure. He allowed me three or four breaths of air between chokes. It was like I'd lived my whole life in the dark, waiting for a little hole to open, through which air would come. All other thoughts were gone. I was sure he'd continue until once he wouldn't let go anymore, and I would have to suffer the burning pain in my chest until I'd die in panic.

I realized I had breathed free for some time. He tore off the duct tape and I gasped enjoying the safety of two airways. He stroked my face. He still hadn't said anything and I didn't like it. He'd made me afraid many times but his silence was worse, unnerving. It reminded me of psychopathic killers in movies.

He put one of his fingers in my mouth. I knew the meaning of that and sucked on it gently. He sighed. Perhaps he'd be gentle if I was. He took hold of my head by the hair and shifted his weight. His cock touched my lips. I kissed its head and teased him, flicking with my tongue. I was eager to please. I didn't want to die. I needed to make him say something. I sucked him deeper into my mouth where I could massage him better with my tongue. As more of him slid inside my mouth he groaned "боже мой," bozhe moy, oh god.

My hands were pinned by his thighs but were free from elbows down. I lay my hands on the backs of his thighs and nudged gently to imply he could control the rhythm himself. He groaned and pushed his way inside, seeking the depth where I'd start gagging. He started murmuring, but with words so blurred and incoherent I couldn't make them out. His Russian made me safer. That flow of resonating buzz could not carry cruelty. I knew he wasn't going to kill me.

He fucked my mouth slowly, keeping regular breaks letting me swallow some phlegm and breathe. When I was uncomfortable I'd touch his thigh lightly and he'd let me cough or lubricate him slicker with saliva. When we'd established a routine, he started moving faster and plunging deeper. He reached behind my head and removed my blindfold. The light stung my eyes for a while, but I was relieved to see his face again. He wanted to look into my eyes when he would push into my throat the first time. Just as he had wanted when he first thrust himself in my pussy or penetrated my ass. He fed me his whole length, not stopping when I began to gag. He buried his shaft deep, it tickled my larynx choking me. I kept his gaze defiantly. My pussy twitched in pleasure and my muscles tightened around the plug filling my throbbing butt. Vanya kept his hold on my head moaning, groaning and mumbling.

Wetness welled in my cunt when he started fucking my face for real. I was helpless: hands pinned down, head propped for easy access, mouth vulnerable and a cock down my throat blocking all screams and pleas, my face covered in drool. He had a rhythm of five or six fast shallower thrusts and a single slow one down my throat. He pushed until his balls were resting against my chin and he could get no deeper. I masturbated, massaging my clit faster and faster, while I licked his cock sliding past my tongue. Every time he paused to rest his length in my throat, enjoying my gags, my pussy tingled. I was wretched and I was horny and I loved his unyielding weight on me. He forced himself again down my throat and stayed there for a longer moment, not letting me breathe, murmuring to me what a good girl and how dirty a slut I was for him. His smut talk instantly washed me over the edge and I came, unexpectedly and violently. My throat spasmed and he kept groaning dirty things to me, as my third hole milked him as frantically as the others had. I felt like I was throwing up his cock. My legs thrashed uncontrollably. Rigid, cramping and convulsing, I rode an extended orgasm. He pulled out and I gasped for air, my slit still throbbing with arousal. I lay there dazed and content after my orgasm as he kept on using me. His pace got faster and faster until half of his frenzied thrusts bumped into my lips and cheeks.

He started moving down my body, shaking. "I'm gonna, I'm gonna c... I'm sorry baby. The plug, gotta feel," he panted. "I need to cum inside you." At least I think it's what he said for he had resorted to Russian. He'd lost his Finnish fucking my throat. He shut my mouth with his hand, rested his weight on his other hand by my head and eased his way in my aching burning cunt. He made a few slow strokes in and out to lubricate himself. I was dripping my own wetness and the gel he'd put in me.

He was too worked up to go easy on me and began pounding wildly inside me with desperate shoves. He bellowed the whole time, his back rigid, his stabs becoming more and more savage. He'll make me bleed again. He was so close to coming, it took only fifteen seconds of cruel abuse of my cunt for him to explode inside me in uncontrollable shakes. It was an eternity for me though, every thrust agony, every bump against my hips torment. I had the plug up my ass which made my pussy even tighter, even less able to accommodate an invader. It was a good thing he had cupped his hand over my mouth because I howled in pain.

He collapsed on top of me, breathing heavily. Reaching down between my legs he whispered exhausted, "Be still now, I'll do this as gently as I can."

There wasn't a way to do it gently. My sphincter had retracted closer to its normal state. He would force it open without any easing, and pull the plug out the biggest ball first. How would he be able to make it anything but excruciating? I started crying before he even touched the handle of the plug. He put his lips on my ear. "извините душенька моя." Izvinite dushenka moya, I'm sorry baby.

The mass of pain that was once my pelvic region throbbed in agony. It hurt just to lay down and have my weight pressing it into the mattress. I could feel my heart beats in there as new blood gushed to the veins. By this time I was convinced that his anesthetic gel was placebo. He put the side of his hand between my teeth and started to pull on the plug. He was feeling guilty and didn't want me to suffer the pain alone.

I tried to pant, relax my ass, to brace myself, to adjust my butt to a better angle, but nothing changed the fact that the thing would tear my anus yet again. He kept a steady pull on it. At first the plug dragged the skin and tissue around my anus outward with it. Slowly my sphincter started to stretch, showing a growing little circle of plug around its base. Vanya kept pulling and I bit down and tried not to scream too much so the neighbours wouldn't hear.

The pain was so shocking my tears had stopped. I hated Vanya. I was furious. I was already hurting like hell before he took me to the bathroom to use my battered body again. He knew how raw and torn I was and he'd put me through more. He had no right. I remembered the buried alive panic when he held my nose shut while my mouth was taped. I stopped holding back and used his hand as a gag. I bit down on it as he pulled my insides out through my tiny opening, which would probably be a gaping hole by the time he'd get the plug out.

The anger helped me bear the pain. I seethed and hated and bit down on his hand and groaned.

"It's almost out, just a little left," he assured me but I couldn't stop the scream anymore. The widest part was coming through. I knew after it the pain would abate, but it did not make these seconds any easier. The seconds were long. Vanya didn't dare to pull harder and kept the same, steady, agonizingly slow pace. The last times he'd abused me, I had mercifully passed out, but now I wasn't exhausted enough to receive the same pardon. Finally I felt the pain lessen. The plug came out, the smaller balls eliciting less intense twangs of pain. When it was gone my butt felt really strange. The raw aching feeling was familiar but the sense of void I'd never had in my butt before.

Vanya rose up and sat on the side of the bed looking at the floor. He was obviously anxious. I lay still and tried to get myself together.

"I'll..." Vanya muttered, and stood up taking a few hesitant steps. "I..." he started but couldn't finish.

I rose, fury overruling the crippling pain, and lunged at him. There was a disgusting slick feeling between my buttocks and thighs. I managed to surprise him with a hard slap in the face. I beat him in the chest and everywhere else in my reach and kicked him.

"God damn it Vanya, never fucking ever duct tape my mouth! I thought you were going to kill me when you pinched my nose you lying bastard! You said you wouldn't --" At some point during my outburst I had started crying. I shouted and sobbed and pounded my fists on his chest. Me hitting him was like a ladybug hitting a sparrow, and when he'd had enough he simply put his arms around me and hugged me to his chest until I gave up trying to get a hand free to hit him. His hand was purple from where I'd bit him.

"Listen for a moment." Vanya's voice was distressed. "I knew you wanted me at the club. I felt it, an energy, like a hum you tried to hide." His shoulders slumped a little. "Then I had to leave. My friends, remember?" He emphasized the word friends in a mocking tone. "When I ran into you, I, I didn't plan... this. I just wanted to see you again. See if you... if you'd still hum for me." He'd lifted his hands on my face. He stroked my cheeks looking me in the eyes. "In the park I felt it, strong, but you were holding back. I knew you wanted me to touch you, take you even but you didn't want to say it. A pretty little thing like you, just aching for it, and so scared that what you want is wrong." He took my hands in to his, holding them between us. "I had to make sure. I asked if you wanted me, but things got really intense. I know now I went too far but when I learned you liked to be hurt, liked to be dominated, I got excited and didn't know where to stop."