Home Ch. 09

"Yeah. Uh sorry about that. I just...couldn't."

"Oh no sweetie!" Victoria said quickly. "It's fine. I completely understand. I drugged your boyfriend and he almost died. Plus the whole Stiles situation. I didn't really expect you anytime soon. Did you get my letters?"

Peyton didn't like the hopeful way she asked. It ate at her guilt. "Yeah, I got 'em. But to be honest, I didn't read any of them. Except the first one."

A wave of shame wafted over Victoria's face. "I'm very sorry about that one Peyton. It was when I was first locked away and I was angry. God, I was always so angry. But that's what I wanted to talk to you about honey." She bent her head, staying quiet for a moment. Peyton waited patiently.

"I was such an angry woman back then Peyton. I mean, I carried rage with me wherever I went, never really knowing why. I honestly think I was meant to be locked up in here. I did things, disgusting things, just to spite the world. Now I can't do any of that. I mean, it's prison, and I hate it. But I feel like a different woman now. I feel peaceful. I spend a lot of time trying to keep my head down, so I've had a lot of time to think." Victoria got quiet again. Peyton saw Victoria's eyes brim with tears. It stunned her. Victoria placed her palm against the glass, letting the tears spill freely. "Anger is a living thing Peyton. A creature that burrows itself inside you, born from something, anything, and it feeds and festers and consumes you. I refused to let any of my past aggression go and I became this ugly version of myself. And you got the full wrath of it. You're my sister. And I'm sorry. For every wrong I've ever done. I'm so fucking sorry Peyton."

Victoria was crying and Peyton was stunned silent. She swallowed and tried to absorb everything Victoria had said at once. Victoria sniffled and removed her hand from the glass, dejected.

"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know that I'm changing. I'm becoming better. I will be better."

"Victoria, I can't just forgive you." Peyton said honestly.

"I know, I know. You don't have to. I just... I don't know." Victoria looked down, obviously trying to find something to do with her hands.

Peyton frowned at the sympathetic tug in her chest. She had had no intention to feel anything but contempt for her sister. But the tears, the speech, the stutter were as genuine as Peyton had ever seen. It almost pissed her off. She decided to keep her response short and sweet.

"One day at a time. Ok?"

Victoria grasped for it. "Does that mean maybe one day, you could forgive me my sins?"

Peyton wanted to say no. She wanted to scream no. "Yeah," she said curtly.

It was enough for Victoria. She wiped her tears, sniffled and smiled. Peyton couldn't help but smile back.

The awkwardness was about to set in. "Nate and I are getting married next week."

Victoria squealed loud enough to make Peyton wince and pull the receiver away.

"Oh yay. I'm so happy for you! I wish I could come."

Peyton noted that Victoria probably wouldn't have been invited, even if she wasn't incarcerated. But she refrained from saying it.

"You got a dress yet?"

Victoria's eyes looked hungry for information, so Peyton gave it. She described the all-white all lace gown. She gave Victoria a look at the big diamond shining bright on her left ring finger. She described the soft coral bridesmaid's dresses and the lilies she'd ordered. She described the décor for St. Michael's, where she'd say 'I Do' and the effort she was making to lose weight before the big day.

"Why?" Victoria asked, tilting her head.

Peyton looked away. "C'mon Vic. Ten Ton Peyton, remember?"

Victoria looked like she'd burst into tears again. "Fuck. Peyton look at me." Peyton took a second, but shifted her eyes back to her sister. "Did you know I never really knew my daddy?" Peyton frowned and shook her head. "Well I didn't. I only ever knew your dad. He was... nice. I wasn't used to his kind of niceness. I liked it. But he loved you. You were the apple of his eye. I got his niceness. You got his love. And I hated it. I hated you for getting the better deal. So I found something you were insecure about and latched onto it like a leech."

"Vic, it doesn't matter. I'm not exactly a size 4."

"Well neither am I!" Victoria laughed and jiggled hefty her breasts.

Peyton smiled. "It's strange. The things that stick with you for years. It's in my head now Victoria. I can't not see myself as Tonny."

"Does Nate see you as Tonny?"

Peyton shook her head again.

"For that matter, does anyone else?"

Again, a head shake.

"Then! You're beautiful, so be beautiful. Simple as that."

Peyton thought about it for a second. You're beautiful, so be beautiful. She smiled. "Thanks Vic."

Victoria brightened even more at the nickname. The sisters talked some more, the awkwardness lifted, the subtle comfort settling in. Peyton tried her damnedest to not think of the reasons why they had to talk under these circumstances.

"Our time is almost up hun." Peyton said gingerly.

"Yeah it is." Victoria swallowed and looked down. "Thank you for coming. You have no idea what you've done for me." More tears travelled down Victoria's brown face.

"I can come back sometime. Maybe bring some pictures from the wedding if you'd like."

Victoria smiled. "I'd love that. Thank you."

Peyton smiled back before bidding her goodbyes. As she got up to leave, she turned back to Victoria and saw that her hand was pressed against the glass. Peyton could only wave timidly before walking away. She broke into a sprint to her car and quickly got in. She sat for a while, staring at her steering wheel again. She slid her hand against her tummy. She caressed her curves and explored her own hills and peaks. And then she smiled.

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"The wedding is off!" Peyton cried miserably. "It's ruined I tell you. I'm calling it off!"

Jane sighed and plopped down next to her. "Oh honey, stop being such a drama queen! Nate is out there waiting for you. What's the problem now?"

Peyton buried her face in her hands. She wasn't crying, refusing to ruin her make-up or get mascara on her gown. She felt Jane's delicate hand on her bare back. The strapless wedding dress plunged in the back to the middle of her spine. Jane's touch was reassuring.

"As your maid of honor, I demand you to tell me what's making you freak out like this! You're going to be a married woman in half an hour. You've got people out there waiting for you. You've got Nate out there waiting for you."

Peyton mumbled in her hands, shaking her head.

"What?" Jane asked, leaning closer to Peyton, giving over her ear. But Peyton just mumbled again. In a fit of frustration, Jane gave Peyton a tough pinch on the shoulder.

"Ouch!" She squeaked.

"Talk now girly. We don't have time for this!"

"I'm pregnant!" Peyton cried out.

Jane's jaw went slack. Peyton got up and started fanning her face, pacing back and forth. "I'm pregnant Jane. I took 6 tests this morning. All different brands. All positive. I'm knocked up!"

She placed her hands over her belly and stared down at a shell-shocked Jane.

Jane shook her head a few times, then smiled up at Peyton. "That's amazing baby girl! Why are you freaking out? This is amazing news!"

"But Nate-"

"No Peyton. Listen to me." Jane stood and gripped Peyton's shoulders hard. Her eyes claimed Peyton's, refusing to let go. "Do you want to marry that man out there or don't you?"

"Of course I do. I just-"

"Hush. No more excuses. You've been making up reasons to deter this wedding for weeks now. Do you want to marry Nate. Yes or no."

"Yes." Peyton said, completely confident in her answer.

"Then marry him silly goose. Just marry. Let the rest of the pieces fall where they may. Don't over complicate it. Marry the man."

Peyton beamed. "Keep it simple."

"That a girl!" Jane slapped both of Peyton's shoulders and gave a quick laugh. "Now hurry up and fix your face. Pastor Donovan is will be waiting to walk you down the aisle." She kissed Peyton cheek sloppily, making a wet smacking sound.

Peyton did as she was told, wiping her brow and touching up her make up. She sat down on the couch, but stood again, agitated. Her head rang with words. Jane's words. Victoria's words. Nates words. She stood in front the vanity mirror, staring at her reflection. Her skin was warm in the sunlight. Her wedding dress cupped her breasts and molded to her body like a glove. Her curls were pinned in the back of her hair with a sapphire rose hair clip given to her by Jane.

"It's something old and something blue!" She'd chirped. "And the dress is new. And as for something borrowed..." Jane had given Peyton her sapphire pendant necklace. Peyton had gasped and almost denied it.

"Don't worry honey. It's something borrowed. I expect it back."

Peyton touched the necklace now, laughing fondly. Her reflection smiled back at her. It was a new smile. Something Peyton had begun seeing more and more since she'd met Nate. It showed all her white teeth, transformed her face, brightened her eyes, accentuated her hidden dimple.

Happy.

This, was a happy smile.

A rare and beautiful thing.

Peyton turned and marched right to the door. She opened it and saw Pastor Donovan, a fist raised, ready to knock.

"Are you ready dear?" He asked.

Peyton walked to him and wrapped her hands around his neck. "Thank you. For everything. Thank you." She whispered. She pulled back and adjusted his bow tie.

"I'm ready now."

Pastor Donovan stood straighter, his head held high. He jutted out his elbow and Peyton placed her arm in the crook of it.

They walked through the hallway slowly. Her breath caught with every step. Her nerves were shot and she had to physically will herself not to tremble.

"This is happening. This is happening. This is happening. This is happening. This is happening. This is happening. "

The chant was ritual in her head. She heard the band begin to play. Instead of playing "Here Comes the Bride", Peyton had begged Nate to hire a classical band, with violinists and cellists to play a particular version of "Halo" by Beyoncé on strings. Nate had been skeptical at first until she played the YouTube video for him.

"See! The band Aston does it beautifully! I want to walk down the aisle to this!" She'd pleaded. Nate put up no objection.

With every movement she made, she was glad she chose it. Now, as the doors opened and revealed to her the people, the flowers, the smiles... all she saw was Nate. He stood, so close but so far, beaming at her with enough love and devotion to almost halt Peyton in her tracks. The golden sunlight swam through the room, framing Nate with brilliant luminescence.

Peyton wanted to run to him, fling herself in his arms, and be his. But she walked on unsteady feet. No words had been spoken yet. But his eyes... those glorious blue eyes. They were enough to quell any and all fears. She reached the altar and kissed Pastor Donovan on the cheek. He walked to Nate, gave him a firm handshake, and took his place as the best man. Peyton handed her bouquet of soft peach flowers over to Jane, who squeezed her hand lovingly.

The reverend beckoned the guests to be seated. Before he could begin, Peyton held up her hand.

"One second," She whispered. Nate frowned instantly. She crooked her finger and he bent down towards her.

"You ok baby?" He whispered worriedly.

"Yeah. I'm just pregnant."

Nate stood straight, his mouth open. Peyton grabbed his hand and placed it on her lower abdomen. He stared down at her, his face blank.

"Um... everything ok?" The reverend asked nervously.

Nate reacted suddenly, wrapping his arms around Peyton and hoisting her into the air. He spun her around, ignoring Peyton's cries for release.

"My wife is pregnant!" He exclaimed.

The guests clapped and laughed and sighed in relief. Nate put Peyton down and kissed her fiercely. It was hot and demanding and left Peyton delirious.

"Hey, hey, hey not yet!" The reverend chastised.

Peyton and Nate blatantly ignored him.

"We're having a baby?" He said, bursting with joy.

"Yes. We're having a baby." She said, emanating the same enthusiasm.

"I love you. I love you Peyton. I fucking love you. I'm in love with you." He said rapidly. He hugged her to him again, squeezing her body tight.

"I love you too. So much Nate."

Peyton didn't question or overthink. She had Nate and love and a family and a home.

And it was beautiful.

THE END.