Hot Oil and Fish

One of the most beautiful women in the world and she wanted to go out with me!

She didn't know me from Adams house cat, but I certainly knew her. So did the rest of America. She was one of the highest of the high fashion models; her picture had graced almost every major publication in the free world.

Her call came in just when I thought the summer doldrums couldn't get any worse. The mid-afternoon temperatures here on the Florida Keys in early July were well into the 90s and it was very humid. Winter tourists had long since gone home and it was still a little early for the families with children that invade us every summer.

I picked her up at her motel and couldn't believe my eyes, she was even more beautiful in person than any magazine could ever depict. Her entire ensemble was straight out of a fashion page. She was wearing a white blouse accented with red piping and a red logo on the pocket, white shorts with a red stripe, white athletic shoes with the same red logo and a white and red sun visor that allowed her naturally wavy blond hair to be shown at its best. She still looked cool as a cucumber.

"Hi, I'm Ed"

"Hi Ed, I'm so glad you were free and could take me out."

"I'm very happy to do it. How did you come to call me?"

"Three or four people told me you were the best bonefish guide in the Florida Keys, and I want to catch a bonefish with my fly rod."

It was only eight o'clock in the morning so I suggested that we have breakfast before we hit the water. "Low tide will be about noon and the best fishing will be an hour on both sides that."

"I wouldn't mind leaving a little early and spending some time on the water. I need to work on my tan, so let's get going as soon as we can after breakfast."

We were well underway by ten o'clock, headed for what I knew to be one of the hottest bonefish flats in this part of Florida Bay. As we motored along, I watched bug eyed as she shed her fashionable clothing and stripped down to the skimpiest of string bikinis.

When we finally stopped she asked me to apply sunscreen to that portion of her back she couldn't reach. I was so blinded by her beauty and the erotic feeling of my lubricated hands slipping and sliding over her body that I almost didn't see the bonefish tailing. With reluctance, I stopped what I was doing and pointed out the feeding fish to her. I'm sure I had tears in my eyes and let out an audible sob when she picked up the fishing rod. I know I had a pain in my gut.

Her ability with the fly rod was almost magical. With a few deft strokes she dropped the artificial crab within four or five feet of the bonefish's nose. Any closer would have spooked the fish and any further away he wouldn't have seen it. A slight twitch of the rod transmitted movement to the artificial lure and the bonefish had it!

Her reaction was that of a pro, she set the hook and then held the rod high while the fish took almost 50 yards of line on the first run. Even in the heat, I couldn't help but admire her poise and grace as she stood on the forward deck of the boat fighting the fish. Her entire body was glistening with the sheen of perspiration but there was not a full drop of sweat evident anywhere. From the rear, the thongs were almost invisible and she appeared nude. Any sport magazine would have paid a handsome sum for that picture. I can't tell you what it was doing to me.

The fish ran in a wide arc, the thin line slicing the water like a razor. I was poling furiously, trying to keep the bow of the boat aimed at the silver streak and for a few moments I forgot the blond Aphrodite standing, almost nude, on the front deck of my boat.

It took about 35 minutes for her to bring this six-pound fish to the net and when we released it I couldn't believe her reaction. She was bouncing around like a schoolgirl, laughing and giggling. I tried to look at her but all my eyes could see were the tiny triangles of cloth that were losing the battle to restrain her breasts.

I didn't see it coming when she put her arms around me and gave me a big hug and kiss. "Will you finish putting the oil on my back? Also how about on my tummy just below my bosom? I can't see under there. Then when you finish I'm ready for another fish."

It must have been the heat but when my hands touched her tummy I thought they were melting. About three strokes and she saw another damn fish. The scenario was almost the same except the fish was a little smaller. This time I was ready for the hug and kiss but it didn't come. Just as I reminded her that I hadn't finished her tummy yet she saw the last fish of the day.

A little after noon she landed this seven and a half pound monster. The hug that followed was delicious but the kiss on the forehead was disappointing.

The little skiff skipped across the flats and she sat close beside me on the little helm seat on the way back to the Marina. Her hand was massaging my shoulder muscles and her voice was liquid syrup as she told me how much fun she had this morning and how she wished that she could do something for me. (And I thought I was hot before.)

She paid me, added a generous tip and then turned my knees turned to jelly when she said "come by my motel later this afternoon and I will really show you how much I enjoyed today."

I'm going too -- if my wife will let me!

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