How to Get Her to Swallow

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A "more academia than lusty" oral How-To.
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After receiving a request for just what follows, I give you this piece of wisdom. Note: My wisdom, and $1.90 will get you a small coffee at D&D!

So gentlemen, I bet a lot of you are wondering the answer to the following question: "How do I get her to swallow?" At least, that was what the request I received asked of me. Here is my take, for whatever it's worth, on that very subject.

1. Each man's "taste" is different-- or so I've heard *wink*. It also varies based on diet. If you are a man who eats a lot of garlic or onions, drinks a lot of coffee, or consumes items high in sulfuric compounds -- certain antibiotics like Bactrim, Septra, and Pediazole (although I hope none of the readers are taking that one-- it would violate your user agreement), anticonvulsants, diuretics, or foods like kelp, kale, turnips, brussel sprouts (although I don't know why you'd want to eat those)-- your semen will be more bitter. If you really want her to get it in her mouth at all, try to cut these items way down. Of course, if your drugs are long term, medically necessary, this may not be a good choice.

It is possible to eat differently to improve the taste, so I encourage you-- strongly-- to do so. Consuming foods like lemon, celery, pineapple, and other high sugar fruits, in addition to herbs and spices like cinnamon and parsley have, anecdotally, been shown to sweeten the taste of your ejaculate. This is a very nice gesture on your part, so make sure you tell us.

2. Now if she is a "spitter" rather than a "swallower," you are already half way there. Many women mistakenly believe that spitting it out will help them to avoid the taste, which-- trust me men-- is not preferable to cheesecake no matter what some of these stories may insinuate. However! The good news is, that if she swallows, the taste doesn't stay in her mouth as long. The act of spitting actually spreads the flavor along all the various types of flavor receptors on the tongue, and will cause the taste to linger.

Another thing you can try, which you'll love too, is the Altoid trick. Altoids are the best for this, but any highly flavored peppermint will do. As she is blowing you, have her keep one in her mouth. The sensation will blow your mind (pun intended), and it will also overpower any unwanted flavors that she may encounter.

3. Now, if she is a "tell me ahead of time" kind of gal, you are going to have more difficulty. Although I am not entirely certain why a woman would do something so hurtful, I know that this is an issue. And let me also take this opportunity to apologize on their behalf. I can imagine that it would be like a guy telling me he didn't want to go down on me because it was "gross tasting." Yeah. Big X for him. On the other hand, she may have some perfectly valid reasons: STD's (STI's) can be easily transmitted through contact with bodily fluids like semen if you have a cut in your mouth, on your lips, etc, etc. If this is not her concern, assure her that there is nothing harmful about it: approximately 7 calories-- she certainly won't get fat-- and containing, on average, 3 million sperm, it is entirely harmless.

I will suggest the following:

A: Tell her you want her to. Appeal to her nurturing side by explaining that it is hurtful to you that she is "grossed out" by it. Even if it isn't true, I'd believe it, and I'm a bit of a Doubting Thomas.

B: Ask her what her opposition to it is: if it is the taste-- see numbers one and two, and show them to her too! If it is the texture, which at times can be a little off-putting, explain that the "texture" changes. If you haven't had an orgasm in a while, the texture is different than the resulting ejaculate of a second orgasm. You may want to offer to masturbate before hand-- I'm sure, with the promise of her swallowing, this wouldn't be a hardship.

C: If she just thinks it is gross, you may be SOL. Nevertheless, you should talk to her honestly about it. Tell her why you want her to swallow: what it means to you. You may also want to mention that it just plain feels better if she keeps going until you are done cumming. Give her the following analogy: What if I stop whatever I'm doing just as you start to have an orgasm? Imagine the difference for me.

Here is my advice for the ladies: As the Nike commercial says: Just do it. Make sure it's at the very back of your mouth, as far back as you can get it without gagging yourself, when he orgasms. This way, the ejaculate doesn't hit any of your taste buds at all. Really, with the face baths we expect them to take, what's half an ounce of semen?

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