I Can't Stay Away

To those who asked, all my stories are pure fiction and are in no way or form true. On another note all comments, rates, and votes are greatly appreciated. If there's something I need to improve don't hesitate to let me know. I only ask that you do it in a respectful, constructive way without being rude. Please and thank you. Enjoy the story.

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Dear Diary,

Yes, I knew he was bad. I knew he broke the law. I knew it all along. I was so used to following the rules. So used to doing what everyone else told me to do. I should have said no. I should have ignored him.

I didn't. I was finally getting attention. All throughout my teen life I was basically ignored by guys. He didn't ignore me. Nor did he allow me to ignore him, believe me I tried to. I didn't want to be involved with someone like him.

He was what they call a bad boy. The hot guy who barely attended school and did things that were certainly against the law. He wasn't in a gang but he knew people who were. He was bad, but he was so charming. And sexy. How could I deny someone who looked like an angel when they would smile?

There was something about him. I don't know but it got and kept me interested. When we got together it was the beginning of senior year of highschool, three months ago to be exact. We turned 18 only a week apart from one another.

I don't know if he knows that I know but he does drugs sometimes. I want to tell him to stop. I'm afraid that he'll get upset with me or just deny that he does drugs in the first place. I don't want to lose him. I mean I finally have a boyfriend. A hot, tall, and funny one.

Going out with him has brought me really good things but also a lot of bad. My relationship with my parents is up in smokes lately. Sometimes I stay out until the wee hours of the morning to their dismay. One time we were at a party and he slipped something in my drink.

I don't know what it was but I sure wasn't myself for a good while. I was so upset at him for that. But then he started calling me a wimp and threatened to break up with me. I couldn't let that happen, I finally belong.

It used to be me, myself, and I but now I have a "clique." I belong to. I was willing to do whatever I needed in order to remain in that clique. Because being alone with no friends sure did suck.

Even though this group is temporary and fake, I'll settle for now. I am so not complaining considering my friends list was zero before now.

I mean dating a bad boy is so awesome though. I get to be rebellious. I get to drink and party like normal teens. I'm also respected amongst my peers in school. Girls don't dare bully me knowing who my boyfriend is.

I love it. I love not having to worry if someone's going to purposely trip you and make you fall down the stairs or gang up on you with their friends.

Dating someone so feared, envied, and admired might've been the best decision I ever made.

My parents don't approve of my boyfriend. Their disapproval only made me want him more. It's like them saying no to our relationship only pushed me into his arms. This will sound bad but I loved seeing their hurt and disappointed faces.

I was so used to that proud look they always for when they looked at me that it was oddly refreshing to see something new. Sorry mom and dad, but that innocent little girl is gone. She's a 18 year old woman now.

I wonder how they'll react when I tell them I'm not going to Stanford even though I got accepted.

My boyfriend says I should stay here with him and enjoy life. He says I'm too young to be all work and no play. My man is so smart. He gives the best advice!

People think I'm crazy for being with him. No, I'm just crazy in love. Our relationship gives me an adrenaline rush. The dangerous nature of it was very exciting despite being scary sometimes.

One day we'd have a quiet night to ourselves. Another day he's getting in to trouble. He always made it out though. Every time he gets in a sticky situation he manages to get out of it. Almost automatically most days. He's so good at being bad.

Adults in my life tell me I'm changing at rapid speed, even though I told a good portion of them that I wouldn't change. I wear makeup, I dress more revealing, and I even changed the way I talk.

Was my boyfriend responsible for this? Or was it all me? I don't know but maybe it's for the better. Old me was so boring, she never got any attention. New me did and still does.

My family tells me to stay away. My teachers even tell me to quit associating with him. I know they say he's bad for me. I know he breaks the law. But he's a bad boy. My bad boy. Bad boy captured my heart. Bad boy made me no longer afraid. He's everything. And I can't stay away.