I'm Not Jimbo Bond

"What if he's blown his cover? What if that's what got him killed?" demanded Jim, none too keen to risk his life.

Trish grimaced at this. "We don't know he's dead yet. And I don't think his cover is blown. Your...liaison with Anastasia suggests his cover is still good."

"But I don't know anything about disarming a bomb!"

Trish shook her head. "It won't be necessary. The plan we've put in place means that all you need to do is to convince the organisations leader to give herself up."

"What? Are you crazy?" Jim didn't fancy either his bomb disarming skills or his terrorist negotiation skills.

"It was Jimbo's original plan," replied Trish. "And your run in with Anastasia Drako tells me you've got what it takes to do the job."

***

About ten minutes later Jim somehow found himself alone in the dingy room with Agent Trish Stratus. He wasn't quite sure how she'd managed it, but somehow she'd talked him into agreeing to their hair-brained scheme to save the world.

In less than two hours, Jim would be deep in the lair of Ingrid von Raven, the leader of the terror organisation that was planning on activating a nuke, and it would be up to him to convince her to give herself up.

According to Trish, Ingrid had an incredible weakness for men and for sex. Apparently all Jim had to do to save the day was to seduce the evil criminal mastermind and she would agree to whatever he suggested.

Jim had been rather reluctant to go along with this plan until Trish had shown him a photograph of the terrorist. If Anastasia and Trish could be described as beautiful, sexy women with killer bodies and great racks, Ingrid von Raven was a goddess. She had the face of an angel, with perfect, finely crafted features and fiery red hair. Her full and pouty red lips looked as though they were made to slide up and down a hard cock. The villainess's body was that of a penthouse centrefold, every curve the ideal male wet dream. Long legs, a tight round ass and boobs that didn't quit.

When Trish had also suggested that she spend the next hour before the mission taking him through a crash course in Secret Agent Seduction 101, the deal was sealed.

"Okay," announced Trish, beginning the instruction. "Let's start with pickup lines. If you're going to seduce Ingrid you need to be able to get her attention. If you can get her wet with a few clever words then the job is half done. Give me your best pick up line."

"Ah..." Jim wracked his brain, trying to think of something witty to say. Truthfully he'd never exactly been a pickup artist.

"Come on," urged Trish. "Give it to me."

Jim did the first thing that came into his mind. "How you doin'?" he asked her, turning up one corner of his mouth and doing his best Joey Tribbiani impersonation. It might have worked if he was a young handsome Italian, but coming from a beer bellied old construction worker the effect was closer to creepy than charming.

Trish shook her head in dismay. "That was awful!"

Jim shrugged uncomfortably.

"Look," said Trish. "You must have heard a few good lines in your time. How about something like; Girl, your legs must tired, because you've been running through my mind all day."

Jim couldn't help but smile at the line.

"You try now," the beautiful secret agent instructed.

Jim hurriedly tried to think of a line he'd heard. Eventually he blurted out the first line that came into his head. "You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear."

Trish frowned in confusion. "Where did that come from?"

Jim blushed a little, realising what he'd just said. "I'm sure I heard that on my some list of pickup lines," he explained lamely.

Trish came back with another line. "Can I borrow a quarter? I promised my mom I'd call her when I met the girl of my dreams."

"I dunno," Jim said after a long pause. "I'll just use one of those I guess."

Trish shook her head in frustration. "Well if all else fails and you can't come up with a good line to get Ingrid into bed then you should revert to Plan B."

"Plan B? What's Plan B?"

"Whip out your cock," she told him.

"What?"

"Well, just try and use a good line," suggested Trish. "Look, forget all that, let's move on to something else. Are you a good kisser?"

"I've never had any complaints," replied Jim. Admittedly he'd never had any complements either.

"Come here and show me then," directed Trish, gesturing for him to approach her.

"Ah, okay," Jim was suddenly a little nervous. He stepped up in front of the beautiful blonde, not quite sure how to proceed.

"Kiss me," she instructed.

Jim moved in, one arm slipped around Trish's slim waist, the other reached around her shoulder to pull her in close for a kiss. He gave a low moan of approval as her soft lips pressed against his and he pulled her curvaceous body against his podgy body. Trish gave a murmur as Jim pushed his tongue hungrily into her mouth and passionately kissed her. He could feel his groin press against her firm thigh as his tongue keenly chased hers.

Trish wrinkled up her face as they broke off their kiss. "You need to do something about that breath," she told him, waving her hand in front of her nose as if to ward off a bad smell.

"Sorry," apologized Jim, remembering he hadn't cleaned his teeth that morning after waking up in Anastasia's hotel room.

"Enough kissing, let's move on. Why don't you grab my boobs, lets see how your foreplay rates."

Jim's eyes went wide. Her face seemed very passive for someone just asking him to grope her.

"Are you sure?" asked Jim uncertainly.

"Give them a squeeze, we don't have a lot of time for niceties here."

"Okay," Jim agreed with a nod. He somewhat cautiously reached up with both hands and pressed them against Trish's chest, letting the firm orbs of her surprisingly large breasts fill his hands. Her tits felt incredible. They were at least as big as Anastasia's wonderful melons had been, more than filling his palms. They were firm and delightfully round and he could feel the thin lace texture of her bra through the material of her pink blouse.

"You can squeeze them, they won't brake," Trish told him, encouraging him to be a bit bolder.

"Oh, wow!" breathed Jim as she gave him permission to grope her. The excited construction worker gave Trish's big tits a firm squeeze through her clothing, letting his fingers sink into the soft flesh of her boobs. "You've got great tits," he complemented her as he squeezed and fondled the magnificent melons, wishing he could feel what they were like beneath her clothing.

"That's good, complements will get you everywhere with Ingrid," Trish told him, wincing slightly as he roughly mauled at her hooters. "Why don't you open up my blouse and get the puppies out?"

"Really?" asked Jim in surprise, stopping his groping, although his hands remained glued to her bosom.

"Yes, yes, take them out."

Jim grinned eagerly as he unbuttoned the front of Trish's blouse, untucking it from her short skirt. After he pushed the blouse off her shoulders, the busty agent reached behind and unclasped the hook of her white-lace bra.

"Holy shit!" gasped Jim in awe as Trish's perfect tits were exposed. They were astonishing. Large and round, and topped by small dark nipples that jutted out slightly in the cool air of the dingy room. Trish's big jugs were amazingly firm, with almost no sag, despite their impressive size. They had felt fantastic through her clothing, but Jim's cock was hard as a rock inside his pants at the thought of touching her bare breasts.

"You can play with them," allowed Trish.

"Ho, momma!" groaned Jim with obvious relish at the prospect. He immediately reached up and clapped his eager hands down on Trish's uncovered knockers. "Oh, these are great!" he gasped as he started to squeeze Trish's extraordinary assets, his fingers sinking deep into the hefty globes of flesh.

Jim was grinning from ear to ear as his groping hands explored the busty secret agent's tits. He squeezed, groped and mauled at the immense spheres, running his hands all over the vast expanse of flesh. Jim scraped his thumbs across the hard buds of Trish's nipples, then gave them a pinch. He then took hold of her breasts in both hands and shook them, watching the ample flesh jiggle across her chest.

"I could spend all day playing with these puppies," he murmured as he continued to vigorously feel up the gorgeous blonde.

"Use your mouth as well," instructed Trish.

Jim didn't stop his boob fondling, but leant down and swiped his tongue across Trish's left nipple enjoying the texture of the hard nub against his tongue. "Nice," he murmured appreciatively as he sucked her nipple into his mouth, still squeezing a big breast in each hand as he began his feast.

Jim gave a happy moan as he rubbed his face in Trish's considerable cleavage and then traced his tongue around Trish's other nipple, slurping hungrily on the tip of her right breast.

"That's not bad work," admitted Trish after she had let the middle aged construction worker gorge himself on her boobs for about ten minutes.

As Jim casually played with her boobs she reached down and unzipped the back of her skirt and let it drop away. Her skimpy lace g-string quickly followed so that she was now completely naked.

"You're fucking hot!" moaned Jim as he gazed in awe at Trish's naked body. Her ass was nicely rounded, almost as sweet as Anastasia's and her pussy was neatly trimmed, a small landing strip of pubic hair above the moist lips of her vagina. She apparently wasn't a natural blonde, but Jim could care less.

Trish pried Jim's groping hands off her chest and sat down on the bed, spreading her long legs. "Lick my pussy," she ordered.

"Okay," agreed Jim as he climbed up on the bed, lying on his side between Trish's perfect tanned thighs. He ran two fingers along the length of her inner thigh, from her knee down to the juncture of her thighs, admiring the incredible smoothness of her soft skin. Jim lightly ran his fingers over the outer lips of Trish's vagina, it was the prettiest pussy he'd laid eyes on.

As Jim slipped one finger inside Trish's moist cunt she lifted her head up off the bed. "Use your tongue."

Jim obeyed, leaning down and swiping his tongue up along the slit of Trish's pussy causing her to gasp. Her twat tasted nicer than the few Jim had sampled in the past, certainly cleaner. The middle aged construction worker used the tip of his tongue to gently toy with Trish's clit causing her to moan in apparent pleasure.

Using his fingers to spread apart the lips of sex, Jim probed inside Trish's cunt with his tongue, the tip of his nose rubbing her clit as he worked her pussy with his tongue.

The busty secret agent had him eat her out for about ten minutes before she finally pulled his head out from between her thighs. She was breathing heavily. "Not bad, not bad at all."

Jim wiped his mouth with the back of one hand, grinning up at the leggy beauty, delighted that he had been able to please her.

"Let's see what you're packing," said Agent Slut, sitting up. As she unbuckled the front of his pants, Jim pulled off his flannel shirt, revealing his big beer belly and hairy chest.

Trish moved to her knees as she pulled off Jim's pants and underwear so that they were both now naked.

"You've got a nice looking cock," she told him as she reached out and grabbed it in her soft hand, running her fingers along the hard shaft. Her other hand snaked out beneath and cupped his testicles in her palm.

After stroking him for a moment she leant forward over his lap and slipped her hot mouth down over his erection. Jim leant back on the bed and gave a satisfied groan as his cock was engulfed in the wetness of her sucking mouth.

Trish bobbed her head over Jim's knob several times, taking him quite deep in her throat. She then drew back and swiped her tongue around the end of his shaft. "Make sure you don't cum too quick," she warned him as she gave the underside of his rigid pole a long slow lick. "If you blow your load in Ingrid's mouth you'll ruin the chance to fuck her."

Trish swiped her tongue over Jim's scrotum, teasing each of his testicles in her mouth as he hand gave a few pumps on his cock.

"She's a criminal mastermind so she might even try a few dirty tricks," the lovely secret agent warned him. Trish's tongue moved down beneath Jim's balls, licking across the sensitive skin between his ballsack and his ass. Her tongue then probed mischievously into his asshole.

"Oh fuck!" groaned Jim as the beautiful, stacked blonde tongued his ass.

Trish then moved back to Jim's cock, once again sucking it into her warm mouth and bobbing her head rapidly over his cock. She was really putting him through his paces. After a couple of minutes of forceful slurping she started to deep throat him.

"Jesus!" moaned Jim as he felt her nose press into his pubic hair, her chin tight against his balls and his entire cock jammed into her mouth. Trish moaned and shook her head slightly, her throat vibrating around the tip of his penis.

Trish drew back off his cock, breathing heavily. "Good stamina," she complimented him. "Let's see your cockmanship now." She got up off her knees and knelt on the bed. It seemed that like Anastasia, she wanted to be fucked doggy style.

Jim wasn't intending to disappoint her. He knelt on the bed behind her, grabbing her lovely firm ass in both hands and giving it a squeeze. He lined his cock up with the dripping wet entrance to her pussy.

"Hmm," Jim started down at Trish's spectacular ass and immediately was reminded of how good his cock had felt in Anastasia ass. After a moment's consideration, Jim aimed a little higher and shoved his hard cock up the gorgeous secret agents ass.

"Ouch! Oh fuck!" cried out Trish in surprise as Jim thrust into her. He had a tight grip on her hips and his cock was well lubricated from the thorough blowjob she'd just given him.

"Fuck that's tight!" Jim groaned as he thrust into her deeper.

"Ow! What the fuck are you doing?" gasped Trish as Jim drew back slightly and then thrust again, this time burying himself deeper into her bottom.

"Fucking you up the ass baby," said Jim.

"Well get it out! Now!" she snapped with a gasp.

"Oh," said Jim, realising that perhaps he should have waited for an invitation before invading her anus. Perhaps only the bad girls liked anal.

"Ow!" complained Trish as Jim's thick erection slid out of her. "Now watch where you're aiming that thing and put it in my pussy."

Jim shrugged as he slid his cock into Trish's pussy. He slid smoothly in, all the way to the base, his cock enveloped in the clutching heat of her cunt.

"Now fuck me like you're going to save the world," said Trish.

Jim didn't have to be told twice. He gripped Trish's slim waist and started to fuck her in earnest, driving his rigid erection rapidly in and out of her pussy, their flesh slapping together as he humped against her doggy style.

Trish was breathing erratically as Jim vigorously pumped against her, she was obviously enjoying the feel of his hard cock thrusting into her. Jim reached out and grabbed a handful of Trish's blonde hair, pulling her head upwards and causing a delightful arch in her back that caused her ass to press back against his thrusting loins.

Jim slammed harder into her, he could feel her wet pussy clutching every inch of his raging erection. "Fuck that's good!" he groaned.

It didn't take much longer. Jim gave a few more thrusts of his hips, ramming his dick into the lovely blonde. He gave a sudden loud cry as his balls boiled over, his hot cum spurting from the tip of his cock and filling the secret agent with his jism.

"Fuck!" he gasped as he came. Jim held tightly onto Trish's shapely hips as his rod continued to spurt, shooting deep inside her pussy.

"Oh Jimbo!" cried out Trish in pleasure. Jim didn't even notice she'd got his name wrong.

"Ahhh...that's so good!" he groaned when he finally slipped out of the beautiful blonde.

Trish rolled over, breathing heavily herself. She'd actually cum as well when he'd squirted inside her.

"I think you've definitely got what it takes to act as Jimbo Bond," she told him, before leaning over to take his spent cock back into her sexy mouth and suck him clean.

***

Several hours later, almost shaking with nervousness Jim took a long swallow of Irish stout. Trish and given him a few last pointers and then they'd dropped him back at O'Flaherty's Irish Tavern.

"I thought I might find you here," said a familiar voice.

Jim turned with a confident smile and saw Anastasia Drako standing behind him. She looked as good as he remembered. Today she was wearing a pair of black, skin-tight trousers and a low-cut black tank top that was showing plenty of her usual cleavage.

"I've got someone that would like to meet you Mr Bond," the leggy brunette told him.

Jim nodded. "Of course. I've been expecting you."

The busty criminal once again led him back to her Lamborghini, only this time she drove and their was no blowjob to be had. Jim considered trying his luck with the buxom brunette but decided he might need all his strength for Ingrid.

They stopped on the outskirts of town outside an Italian restaurant and Anastasia instructed him to head inside. The brunette herself did not go with him, but instead got back into her sports car and drove away.

Jim went inside the restaurant. "Here goes nothing," he muttered under his breath, trying to suppress his nerves.

Inside the restaurant was almost deserted, there was only one customer and she was seated at the bar, sipping from a long cocktail glass.

Ingrid von Raven looked even better in person than she had looked in the photograph that Jim had been shown. The curvaceous redhead was dressed in an emerald green cocktail dress that was tight fitting and low cut, perfectly emphasising her formidable bust and long, sleek legs.

"Good evening Mr Bond," the woman warmly greeted him. She had a faint eastern European accent. "My name is Ingrid von Raven."

"The names Bond, Jimbo Bond," Jim replied as he approached the beautiful redhead. The tight dress clung to every curve of Ingrid's incredible body and Jim couldn't help but let his eyes wander over her lush, hourglass figure, admiring her firm looking, peachy ass, slim waist and the mouth-watering thrust of her ample bosom.

"Anastasia said that I would find you interesting, but I am not sure if I agree," her initial warmth now seemed more like distain.

Jim frowned, his initial confidence ebbing slightly. For some reason he'd been expecting to just walk in and have her fall to her knees in front of him. It was definitely time for one of those killer pickup lines that Agent Slut had taught him.

Jim summoned his wits. "Is your dad a terrorist? Because you're the bomb."

Ingrid von Raven glared at Jim, her expression seemed more anger than lust. Perhaps the terrorist pickup line was not the wisest choice. Things were heading south very quickly. Time for Plan B.

Ingrid opened her mouth to reply when Jim quickly reached down and unzipped his fly, yanking open the front of his pants and whipping out his cock.

It was not quite the proud and triumphant unveiling that Jim had been hoping for however. In fact his cock was actually limp and kind of floppy.

Jim winced expected to be kicked out at best, or more likely kicked in the balls.

Instead the corner of Ingrid's sexy pout turned up into a smirk. "Well, well, well," she murmured, her gaze locked onto Jim's flaccid manhood. "What do we have here?"

Jim froze in surprise, was Plan B working?

The beautiful red haired terrorist stepped down off her barstool and approached Jim, her gaze not straying from his crotch. When she was right in front of him she reached out with one perfectly manicured hand and ran the tip of her index finger down along the topside of his soft penis.