Innocent Collector

by Philip Johnson

Chapter One

"Paul, it's Dale."

"Talk fast because you're signal is breaking up."

There was a pause and then Dale said, "That should be better, I was in a bad spot."

"That is better, what's up?"

"Tina asked me to call and see if you were available to join us for dinner Friday night."

"I am available in fact."

"Invite a friend if you'd like, but that's up to you."

"I'll call Renee."

"That would be great, we've not seen her in a long time. How's the writing going?"

"Not bad actually, you and your dad still talking?"

Dale laughed and told him, "Yeah we're still talking. I don't often see him in fact, so working for him isn't the issue I was afraid it would be."

"Glad to hear that."

"We'll just go to Logan's. It's noisy there, but the food is great. Say five so we beat the rush."

"That works. I don't know how Mishawaka can have so damn many places to eat and it's still nearly impossible to avoid long lines on Friday nights."

"Even with the economy in the toilet."

"Even with. Okay, see you two there, and thanks for the call."

With Dale getting into his father's accounting firm, he had been very busy as he slaved to please his dad. That meant that Paul hadn't seen Dale or Tina in recent weeks.

He was still home and in his office when his phone rang again. "Paul, it's Megan."

"This is a nice surprise, how are things in Battle Creek?"

"Fine. I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but Tony has been diagnosed with lung cancer."

"Oh shit, no. I talked to him a week or so ago and he said he wasn't feeling a hundred percent. How bad is it?"

"Pretty bad I'm afraid. It's quite advanced in fact."

"Damn it, I've told him to stop smoking over and over."

"I have too. He asked me to call you and said he'd be in touch later."

"When did you talk to him Meg?"

"This morning. God that was so hard, he was crying when he told me and he didn't want you to hear him like that."

"Damn it, is anybody with him other than Sybil?"

"Yes, his brother and sister are there with him. From what his brother Jimmy said, he's had symptoms for quite awhile, but he wouldn't go to the doctor. I'm not sure that things would be any different had he gone, but we'll never know."

"Should I come up do you think?"

"That's up to you of course, but I'd say give him a few days to accept the diagnosis."

"What is the prognosis?"

"I haven't heard, but it can't be good. I'll keep you posted of course. Listen Paul, when you do come up, don't get a motel room. You'll be a lot more comfortable if you use my guest room."

"Thanks, I appreciate that, but I'll likely be in and out."

"If you come during the week I'll be at work so I won't know the difference."

"I'll see you Saturday morning then, and Meg, thanks again for calling."

"You're welcome."

Paul sat there and stared at the far wall as he thought about Tony. They had been great friends since childhood and Meg had been friends to both of them for several years, long before Carl, her husband, had died in a car accident. Now he wished he'd never moved down to Mishawaka to be closer to his mother, because she was now in a nursing home suffering with dementia. She often times didn't even know who he was. Were he still in Battle Creek he'd have been there for Tony. Of course it wasn't likely that would have changed anything, but he could have been there for him right from the first doctor visit.

Meg called Paul as soon as she got home from her office and told him, "I think you coming tomorrow is a good idea. Paul, it's really bad. Tony is far beyond benefiting from any kind of therapy, so it's just a matter of time."

"How could the cancer progress so rapidly?"

"It's pretty clear that it's had plenty of time to grow. I talked to him and his brother and sister. Tony admitted to me that he's been coughing up blood for weeks. Not a lot, but more lately. As you know, his lifestyle is pretty sedate so as he noticed that he got tired and out of wind more quickly he wrote off as being the result of him not getting any exercise at all. Bottom line Paul is it's good that you'll be here tomorrow."

"Are you sure I won't be interfering with your life?"

"I'm sure. I'm planning on seeing Tony too and in fact I'm sure my weekend will be focused around him."

"Will it be too much for him when both of us show up?"

"I'm sure that won't be a problem. Paul his time could be measured in hours, days or weeks according to Gina, his sister."

"I'll see you by ten then."

Paul's thoughts were still on Tony as he and Renee joined Dale and Tina at Logan's Steak House. He had told Renee about Tony, but he didn't mention his sad news to Dale and Tina as they talked over dinner.

When there was a moment's pause in conversation, Paul told Tina, "You're looking especially bright and fit, has there been a change in your lifestyle?"

She smiled and after glancing at Dale told Paul, "Thank you for noticing. I have made some changes in fact. Nothing major, but I'm trying to lead a healthier life."

Then Renee said, "I agree, you're looking great."

"I've been under a lot of stress and the only way I've been able to cope is by exercising."

Then looking at Dale, Paul said, "You on the other hand, look a little worse for wear."

"Like Tina, I've been under a lot of stress too, but I'm fine. Just not getting out in the sun so I'm getting more pale than you're used to seeing me."

"That must be it. You know, golf is great for stress and sunshine."

Dale laughed and added, "Golf is stress to me and I can get sunshine by walking around the block a couple of times."

Then Tina said, "Paul you're looking less than effervescent this evening."

He looked at Renee and then told them, "I didn't want to say anything and spoil this evening with sadness." Then he told them about his very good friend Tony dying of cancer.

Tina was quick to take his hand in hers and told him, "Oh no, we met him last year. I'm so sorry, what can Dale and I do for you?"

"Nothing that you or anybody else can do I'm afraid. The whole ugly thing has to play itself out. He's a great guy and doesn't deserve the sentence he has been given, but I guess that's said about many people that are dying or have died. I know I'll miss him very much. I hurt for Sybil, his wife, almost more than anything. Those two were...are inseparable."

Renee and Paul had talked about his writing before they had joined Tina and Dale, but to get away from the sad subject of death and dying, she asked, "So how is your new story coming along?"

He smiled at her in appreciation and said, "Slowly, but that's how it always is when I'm getting into a new project. I'm happy with how it's shaping up though."

"Good." That broke the spell of sadness and their evening of dinner and drinks ended on a much happier note. As Paul and Renee left, she told him in a soft tone, "I think Tina is looking pretty thin."

"I think so too, but I wasn't about to bring that up."

Chapter Two

Paul pulled into Meg's driveway right at ten Saturday morning and she met him with open arms. Their embrace lingered in silence until he told her, "You look great Meg."

She smiled and told him, "Thank you, so do you."

"Anything new about Tony?"

"Nothing new. Put your bag in your bedroom and we can talk over coffee."

He met her in the kitchen and she poured his coffee as he sat down. She sat across from him then and he asked her, "How are you holding up?"

"I'm okay. Not great, but okay and I know it's going to be harder for you than for me."

"I'm working hard at coming to terms with the inevitable."

"Paul, I stopped over there last night and saw him for just a few minutes and told him you were coming. I better warn you, he looks awful."

"I have an idea of what to expect. I know it will still hit me hard though."

"How long can you stay?"

"I was just planning for tonight and tomorrow night."

"You're welcome to stay as long as you want or feel the need to, so if you decide to stay longer I can wash your clothes for you."

"Thank you Meg, but I don't want to get in your way."

She smiled then and told him, "My life is very simple and uncluttered so you won't be in my way at all. It's nice to see you again and we need time to get caught up."

"I wish we didn't live so far apart."

"Two hours isn't so far."

He smiled and asked her, "Then why don't you come down to see me?"

"I could ask you the same question you know."

"I know. Okay, once things settle down we both have to promise to do better about getting together."

"I agree."

"Meg, I'm not trying to pry, but how has it been for you since Carl died?"

"I'm okay now. As you know, the first several months I almost lost my mind, but time really is our friend when we're trying to get on with our lives after a disaster of that magnitude."

He reached across the table and taking her hand in his, he asked her, "Are you dating now?"

She showed a crooked smile and said, "No I'm not dating now."

"So I'd say you're still in the healing mode."

"I'm just not interested in dating is all. I'm sure I will one of these days, but I'm not in any hurry either. And what about you? Are you planning to be a bachelor the rest of your life?"

"Can you imagine being married to me? I'd be under foot almost constantly. I spend hours in my office sometimes. Other times I'm restless and pace or even talk to myself as I try to work through an issue with what I'm working on. I can even get pretty anti social sometimes."

"I have to admit, the lucky woman would have some adjusting to do, but so would you. Having her around might drive you nuts when you're trying to be creative."

"Exactly, so I think I'll just keep things the way they are now."

They put their cups in the sink and Meg put her arms around him again as she asked him, "Are you ready to go see Tony?"

"I'm dreading this, but yes, I'm ready."

Meg drove and it took them less than fifteen minutes to get to Tony and Sybil's and Paul held Meg's hand tightly as Blake, Tony's brother, let them in. Paul shook his hand and the three of them talked softly for a minute before leaving the foyer and entered the living room where Tony was sitting in his recliner. Tony smiled and tried to ease the moment saying, "You'll have to forgive me for not getting up." Paul went over to him, knelt down and put his arms around his friend, something the two of them had very rarely ever down before. That triggered tears and they held onto each other and silently cried.

Tony looked gaunt and pale, but his eyes were reasonably bright and his mind was still sharp. "Really fucked up didn't I Paul. You and Meg both warned me."

Paul didn't know what to say to that, but after stumbling a little he said, "Hey, who knows, maybe it all started from some damn virus or something."

"Yeah, who knows. Man, I'm sorry I had Meg call you instead of me, but I just couldn't make that call."

"I understand and don't worry about it. What can I do for you friend?"

"Not a damn thing I'm sorry to say." He pointed to an I.V. hanging next to him and added, "This is keeping me hydrated and the nurse uses it to give me medication to keep the pain under control. I've pretty much given up on eating other than that liquid shit they push on me. As long as I can swallow that is. Paul, this isn't going to last long. I'm full of cancer now."

Paul wiped his eyes again and said, "This really sucks. I mean it really sucks."

"Very true. Not very eloquent for a man that makes his living with words though."

"Fuck eloquence and writing, this is the real thing."

"No shit."

Meg had been standing aside watching them and then went over and knelt down on the other side of Tony. She kissed his cheek and he said, "Hi beautiful."

"Hi Tony."

"Thanks for bringing Paul over and for coming to see me."

"No thanks necessary. I put him in my guest room, so you'll have to put up with seeing both of us for a few days."

"That's great. Listen would you two do me a favor?"

"You know we will."

"Go to Stoney's and have a couple of beers for me and maybe some of their extra spicy buffalo wings."

"I'll do the beer part, but Paul will have to do the wings for you, is that okay?"

"That would be great."

Sybil got home from shopping and joined them and more hugs and tears were shared, but nothing sad or negative was said in front of Tony. The visiting was tiring Tony, so with repeated promises of having beer at Stoney's and after promising to be back, Meg and Paul left. They made it as far as Meg's car before they shared another long embrace and Paul cried as she held him close. "Damn that was difficult Meg."

"We both knew it would be."

"Do you mind going to Stoney's?"

"Of course not."

"Let's go later today and make it dinner then."

"Okay. Are you going back to see him later?"

"I don't know. I'll call and talk to Sybil later and see what she has to say."

The strain of seeing his friend looking so frail and ill really bothered Paul and he found a way to escape. When Meg came into the living room she found him on his back on the couch sleeping.

Paul woke an hour later and sat up and saw Meg in the side chair reading. He rubbed his eyes and smiled weakly as he said, "Sorry about that Meg."

"No need to apologize, feeling better?"

"Much better actually and I think I'm ready to call Sybil." Then he smiled and added, "I hope I didn't snore."

"Not much at all in fact."

After talking to Sybil, he told Meg, "She asked that we wait until tomorrow to go back."

"I'm not surprised, he was looking very tired when we were there, but he was so glad to see you Paul."

"I think he was too. What a mess life can be sometimes."

"If you want to use my office to do some work, that's fine."

"Thanks, but I'm okay. I'll check my email later, but that's all." He looked at his watch then and said, "How about five for Stoney's? That will give us time to have a beer or two for Tony before dinner."

"That's fine. In the meantime I'm going to run to the store. Can I get you anything?"

"Nothing, and don't buy a lot of things because I'm here. I'm taking you out to dinner tomorrow night."

"Paul, you don't have to do that just for staying in the guest room."

"But I want to."

She just smiled then and said, "Okay, then I accept."

Chapter Three

The weekend seemed to be flying by for Paul. He'd been back to see Tony and had managed to control his emotions much better. He and Tony even laughed when they talked about things they had done when they were younger, but again, Paul didn't stay long. Tony tired easily and Paul was still struggling with his emotions.

Meg said she would drive them to dinner, so he sat back and said, "Okay, you pick the place."

She just smiled and took off. When she pulled into Hooter's he said, "What the hell, you must be kidding."

She smiled and said, "If I left it up to you, we would have gone someplace very nice and pricey and that just isn't necessary."

"But Hooter's?"

"You can't tell me you've never been to one."

"Well yeah, but...now? Tonight?"

"They have good food I'm told."

"Oh, so you've never been in one."

"I never have."

"Okay my love, let's dine on the finest Hooter's has to offer us." They sat on tall stools at their tall table and they smiled at each other. "Meg, you amaze me. You're normally soft spoken and gentle and not taken to impulse."

"Where did you ever get that idea?"

"Well you are. I don't mean stuffy or withdrawn of course, but...I don't know how do explain what I mean I guess, but you definitely surprised me this time."

She just smiled at him and when the waitress came to their table she ordered a vodka and tonic and he ordered a Miller draft.

"Okay handsome, I saw you check out our waitress, how do you rate her?"

"I didn't check her out."

"Of course you did and that's exactly what you were supposed to do."

"Well okay I did glance at her. For a place called Hooter's, she comes up a little short."

Meg laughed and said, "I think she has a nice figure. Of course she can't be more than her early twenties and that helps."

"She does have a nice figure, but her boobs aren't very impressive."

"What does it take to be impressive? How about that dark haired one over at the counter?"

"Not bad at all, but not impressive. I mean if you're going to call the place Hooter's then they should have big hooters."

"You're hard to please I see."

"Not at all. I'm not here for take out, so I can be as selective as I want to be."

Meg laughed and said, "Oh, so your personal standards are less demanding."

"By my personal standards our waitress is nicely shaped. A lot like you in fact, but on a smaller scale."

"Thank you very much, or I think I want to thank you. Smaller scale?"

"She's shorter than you and smaller proportioned than you, but over all a shape similar to yours."

"I'll assume there's a compliment in there somewhere." Their drinks were delivered and after placing their orders she nursed hers and glanced around. "I really expected the women to be more showy. You know strutting their stuff and throwing their shoulders back."

"The first time I went to a Hooter's I was a little let down too. Of course their very short shorts help to make up for any other short comings."

"I'm glad to see that you are a healthy guy."

"You expected otherwise?" She just smiled at him and focused on her vodka tonic.

"Their simple dinner and drinks didn't take them long and they went back to Meg's and by ten thirty both of them were in bed and asleep.

It was close to three in the morning when Paul, lying there more awake than asleep heard a distant rumble of thunder. He turned on his side and glanced at the clock on the bedside table and stretched. He was still tired, but he lay there and heard the thunder a couple more times, so he sat up and then pulled the sheet and blanket back and stood up. He went to the bathroom and got a drink of water and then wandered out to the living room and on to the little den. He saw lightening in the west through the sliding door, so he went over and after sliding it back, he stood in the opening and leaned back against the edge of the door frame. The night air was cool and calm, but he knew that once the storm reached them, the wind would kick up and it would rain. The heavy storm clouds blocked any light from the night sky and the house was dark, so when the lightening flashed it seemed especially bright and dramatic. He let himself be pulled into the nighttime drama and marveled at the elaborate designs the lightening was drawing against the blackness. He was prepared to stay there and watch the show until the storm forced him to retreat into the dry safety of the house.

His mind went to Tony, but then wandered to a hundred different places as he allowed his world to become just him and the storm and the night air brushing over him. He was lost in thought when Meg's voice came to him. "Are you okay Paul?"

He was startled, but he recovered and smiled as he said, "I'm okay, just watching the lightening. It's quite a show, did I wake you somehow?"

"No, the storm did that. I was coming out to do the same thing that you're doing. It's beautiful isn't it."

"It really is." Then he straightened up and said, "Damn, I'm sorry, I'll go put my pants on."

Meg smiled and said, "I wondered when you would realize that you're standing there in your briefs." He moved inside and she said, "No, stay where you are, I don't mind. I've seen men in their underwear before."

"Are you sure? I don't mind....I mean I could get dressed."

"Don't bother on my account. I'm in my...well I have my robe on but...let's just watch the show while we can." She moved close to him and the two of them watched the storm as it slowly moved toward them. The lightening was getting ever brighter and the claps of thunder were getting louder. "Aren't you even a little cold Paul?"