Jason and Zoe

Copyright 2014 by PostScriptor, All Rights Reserved

Jason cautiously walked up to the unadorned dark gray building where he had been instructed to meet his contact. He'd only received word of the possible rendezvous that very afternoon, and he had to hurry just to arrive on time.

Jason was in his late twenties, still a young man, strong and able, and skilled at his trade. He was considered by women to be a fine looking man, his head covered with unruly curly black locks of hair and dark eyes that seemed to pierce right into the heart when he looked at you. He was well muscled, with a classic figure — narrow hips and thin waist leading upward to broad shoulders.

His work kept him outdoors most days, resulting in a deeply tanned, wind blown skin. The only thing that marred his face were eyes that had seen too much and endured too much tragedy over the past two years.

He was anxious. What he faced ahead this evening was uncertain, but he had no choice but to forge onward.

As he turned a corner of the structure and approached the front door, he saw his man. Jason knew him by sight, but had only recently learned his name — Virgil, he remembered. Sort of an old-fashioned name. Not many 'Virgils' around these parts. Virgil saw him at the same moment.

"Jason," he said by way of a greeting.

"Virgil," he replied. They stood looking at each other for a time. "Do you think she will show up?" he asked.

Virgil looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Yeah, I think so. You know it took us quite a while to find her — I don't think she wanted to be found. But I suspect that she is reconciled to the fact that she is going to have to speak to you at some point."

Jason just nodded.

"Wait in there," Virgil said, tilting his head towards the door. As Jason started forward, Virgil looked at the package in Jason's hands.

"That our payment?" he inquired politely, but firmly.

His question took Jason by surprise for a brief second — he had forgotten that he was carrying the fee for setting up this meeting.

"Oh. Sure. Here," he said, handing the package to Virgil.

"Down the stairs to the lower room," Virgil informed him. Jason just nodded his head to show he'd heard.

At that point Virgil opened the door and stood back to let Jason enter the room alone.

"Good luck — I hope you find the answers that you are searching for," he murmured.

The room that he entered had several open windows, and Jason saw empty chairs and tables around the edges of the floor, and a raised dais at the front. The walls in the room were as bland as the outside of the building, no paint nor decoration, just a dingy gray plaster finish.

Not surprisingly, Jason found himself there alone at this time of the day.

The stairs were off on the right side of the room, towards the back. Jason walked across and down the worn treads of the staircase.

The lower room was completely closed and that afternoon only the light coming through the open staircase from the floor above illuminated it. Beyond fifteen or twenty feet into the deep room it was so dark that his eyes couldn't see any detail. He knew that his vision would adjust to the darkness in a couple of minutes.

Jason saw a long bench seat where the little bit of light in the room ended and the darkness began. He had a hand full of flowers that he placed on the bench next to him — hoping that they might be regarded as a peace offering of sorts.

He sat looking down at the floor reflecting on the past two years and his mind drifted. He heard the footsteps before he looked up. When he lifted his eyes, there she was, moving from the shadows towards the light — his wife.

"Zoe?" he asked as the figure approached closer.

"Jason," she replied. "Jason, you look so good, I can't even tell you. You're clearly doing well without me," came the whispered words, a statement rather than a question.

Jason ignored her remark and looked at her. She seemed thin, gray and wan. There was no joy in her face. She was a shadow of the woman who had left him. She stood there, about ten feet away, not coming any closer, keeping her wronged husband at a distance.

She finally broke the silence.

"I see you brought lilies with you. For me?"

"Of course — who else?" Jason replied with just the slightest hint of a smile.

"Thank you. You were always thoughtful and finding ways to please me. Your kindness, though, is a rebuke to me now."

"I didn't mean it to be. I just wanted you to remember better days between us," he replied gently.

Zoe nodded in affirmation, followed by a sigh.

"You wanted to speak to me?" she asked, and then in a flat voice stated, "I'm here now, so ask your questions."

Jason nodded in reply, but it took an act of will to make his voice say the words.

"Why, Zoe? Why? How could you leave me, our marriage, and our three children for that..." he almost choked, and couldn't actually say his name, "that strutting peacock, that mongrel dog, that miserable excuse of a man. I want an answer, not lies. I want the truth!"

The voice that replied was firmer and louder now. "Jason, I don't think that I could ever lie to you, and what would be the point of lying now. What is done is done, and there is no going back or remaking the past."

Zoe paused standing in silence her face looking at the floor. Finally she continued,

"Greed, I think more than anything. Greed, and envy, pride and vanity — they all played their parts. I wanted things that you couldn't give me. I wanted excitement. I was tired of living hand-to-mouth. I was tired of your poor friends, and their low-class wives, and the burden of being a wife and mother all the time.

"I wanted to keep my smooth hands and young looking skin. I wanted my beauty to last forever. I didn't want to look like my mother after a lifetime of work — a wrinkled old crone by the time she was forty."

She paused and then spoke again.

"I think that I was always like that, even as a child; I was selfish and self-obsessed as Narcissus.

"I thought that I was entitled to be showered with riches; I would be one of the beautiful and glamorous people. I would rise above my earlier station to an elevated status. I would be the envy of every woman I met.

"And when he tempted me with his promises, I fell into his trap and abandoned all of you — you, my children, my parents and sisters — without a second thought or a backwards glance. He was my path to freedom. At least what I foolishly believed was freedom."

Jason looked into her face, his eyes asking the question.

"Jason, you needn't even ask, I already know the question. No, it didn't work out that way for me. Far from it. I think you already knew the answer."

She in turn couldn't stop herself from asking a question as well.

"It didn't take you long to replace me, did it?" she whispered, her desperation and regret mixed with anger dripping from her every word.

"What did you expect? I had three young children all under the age of five; I had to do something. I couldn't keep palming them off on your mother or my mother. I had to work. I had to support the family.

"Elena was a godsend!" he declared.

"My sister, Elena. I'm sure she was there to comfort you and offer her care and sympathy. Probably the day after I left," Zoe's words revealing an angry bitterness that Jason couldn't understand. After all, it was Zoe, not him, who had left and thrown away their life together.

"She had always wanted you, Jason! She hungered for you since before she began to bleed, and she waited patiently like a vulture on a branch, watching for a moment of vulnerability and swooping in to feast on the carrion. Ah, but I forget — you're a man, unobservant and indifferent to the emotional undercurrents that surround you!"

Jason kept his face still and didn't respond as he might have: in truth he had known of Elena's desire for him from the very beginning. But it hadn't mattered until the day when he returned to their home to find his mother-in-law sitting in his kitchen, watching their children and waiting for him.

She looked frightened, as if she expected that Jason might do her harm. He stood there in silence unable to comprehend her fear.

"Jason, it isn't our fault — please don't blame us!" she pled, tears running down her cheeks.

"What are you talking about?" he demanded, his intensity making him seem angry. He could see her flinch at his words, trying to shrink into herself to escape from his sight.

"Zoe came and fetched me to watch the children until you arrived home. Then she left with some man from the city. He was dressed in expensive clothes, and she told me that he is rich.

"She told me to tell you not to trouble yourself by coming after her. She was leaving you to be with a man who could care for her in the manner that she wanted!"

Jason took in her words and was frozen in place as his world crumbled around him. He sat in a chair and stared into space — for how long, he didn't know, but when he regained his senses, his mother-in-law had fled back to her house.

He looked up to see his children waiting watching him. Jason realized that he couldn't sit in a stupor enveloped in self-pity; the children needed to be fed and cared for. He somehow dragged himself upright and began his new life, one without Zoe...

Reflecting on the two sisters, Zoe and Elena, Jason could hardly fathom a more unlikely pair.

Zoe was Aphrodite, with large firm breasts that jutted out from her torso like the prow of a ship, a small waist and full hips. She wore her blond hair long and loose, and her full lips held a promise of ecstasy that had caused men to fight over her from an early age. She was like the classic Helen — as the poet said, "Is this the face that launched a thousand ships? ...Sweet Helen make me immortal with a kiss!" If Zoe was vain it was not without cause.

Elena was a stark contrast. If Zoe was Aphrodite, then Elena was Artemis, the huntress. She kept her dark hair short so that it wouldn't interfere with her daily activities. Her breasts were small and firm, akin to half-apples. She was tall and her shoulders wide for a woman, her hips narrow. She was lean and lithe, and graceful as a panther when she moved. Jason disagreed with Zoe: Elena was not a vulture; she was a raptor.

But the two sister's emotional makeup was diametrically opposed to their outward appearances.

Zoe who looked like the goddess of love was actually emotionally detached from the people around her and self-absorbed (Jason had to smile at the irony — Zoe had finally faced that truth about herself!) While Jason tried in every way possible to please Zoe, Jason's happiness was of little matter to her. Zoe could really only love Zoe, and Jason had long despaired at the asymmetry in their feelings toward each other.

Elena, on the other hand, was filled with passion and desire; she wore her emotions on her shirtsleeve and didn't care who knew it. Elena couldn't keep her hands off Jason when they were together. In the privacy of their room at night nothing prepared Elena more for making love than simply touching and kissing Jason. When Jason reached out for her, his touch was electric. She told him as soon as she moved in with him and the children,

"Jason, I am yours. You own my body and my soul. You are my center of the universe!"

And she meant it.

After Zoe abandoned her husband and family, Elena moved in to fill the vacuum and Jason's home life had in fact greatly improved. Elena loved him without condition, and she was a much better mother to his and Zoe's children than Zoe ever was. After two years, the children all called Elena 'Mother' and could hardly even remember Zoe.

Alas for Jason, at some level he still loved Zoe. That was why he needed to speak with her, his hope to close the open wounds in his heart and justify his subsequent actions to himself.

"Jason?" the voice called to his ears.

Jason returned to the present with a start.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was just remembering."

Zoe smiled a little half-smile, "I understand. That's all I do anymore — remember and regret."

Jason needed to start the conversation again. Zoe might leave at any time, and there was still more to know.

"You said that you left because of your greed — and I believe you as far as that goes," he explained, seeing an irritated look quickly cross her face. She might acknowledge her own flaws, but she wasn't happy whenheagreed with her about them. Oh the Vanity!

"But you haven't mentioned the reason that he most certainly wanted you: lust. I assume that you reciprocated his feelings."

Her look of irritation was replaced by one of pain. She sighed,

"Oh Jason, you men are all driven by your lust and your egos. Yes, of course he wanted me for my face and body, and yes I satisfied his lusts. ButIwas never driven by lust.

"I'm sorry, but let me be clear: I enjoyed the love act with you more than with him — your sword is much larger and made of harder metal — but in truth I never looked atanyman and found myself lusting for him physically. I might have lusted for his fortune or his possessions, but..." She laughed at her own frank assessment.

"Jason, it's different for a woman. We aren't driven by the same desires as men."

Jason would have liked to contradict her and let her know that Elenadidlust after him, but he thought it more diplomatic to keep that to himself.

"So how did your time with him end? What caused it to end so tragically?"

Zoe started to quietly weep and after a time regained control.

"I'm so ashamed Jason. It's too hard to tell you," she moaned.

"Please, Zoe. I need to know, to be sure. To live with my own actions."

She slowly nodded as she considered his plea.

"Yes, I suppose. But please promise me that you will keep what I tell you to yourself. Allow me to retain some vestiges of my dignity and reputation," she explained.

Jason thought to himself, "A little late to worry about your reputation!" But what he said aloud was, "Agreed!"

"When he first brought me to his villa, I was treated like a princess — fine new clothes, parties at his friend's homes, attending the theater together. It was splendid. Of course, in exchange I 'performed' for him in the bed chamber."

She snuck a quick look at Jason, and seeing that his face remained impassive to her sordid confession she went on.

"I'm sorry Jason, but to keep him happy I did all of the things that I refused you; things that I claimed were too depraved, perverse and immoral. I guess my scruples flew out the window like a bird when they were competing with my avarice.

"Once I gave in and allowed him to use my body as he wished, I found that what he wanted wasn't that distasteful, and I became accustomed to it rather quickly. But once he had gotten his way with me and something became part of our 'normal' play, then he would demand something new, something more extreme and usually more debasing to me. He even started bringing another man or woman home with him to join us."

After that revelation she looked at Jason and saw the shock and horror on his face. She couldn't go on.

"Do I need to go into all of the details?"

He shook his head and she felt a great relief. He had heard about the practices that her lover engaged in from the whores around town, so the specifics weren't important.

"As time went on, though, I was growing wary. We would have 'good times' together, but the relationship between us didn't seem to be going forward. Any talk of my becoming his wife had stopped, and if I tried to bring up making our arrangement more permanent, he would change the subject. I began to understand that I was nothing more to him than a play toy — a diversion to amused him and occupy his time until someone new and different came along. I began to fear that I would be tossed on the trash heap with nothing to show for my sacrifice. The ultimate irony — my greed leaving me worse off than I had been when I was poor!"

Tears came to her eyes, and she wiped them from her cheeks.

"That final night I was already close to despair. I had made a terrible mistake, and I couldn't see anyway to escape."

"You could have come home to us, Zoe!" Jason interjected.

"My pride wouldn't allow me to — it would be tantamount to admitting that l had been stupid and corrupt."

Zoe paused again after that, and Jason thought he might have to prod her again, when she began speaking on her own.

"The very night that I was going to give him an ultimatum, he told me to dress in my finest because he was going to have some friends over, and he wanted me to act as hostess. I had done that before, so I was not surprised.

"He had a new gossamer gown sent to me that was a little more revealing and daring than any I had worn, but not so much that I was concerned."

Jason rolled his eyes at her description. He had seen the sorts of clothing that the 'beautiful women' wore, and as far as he was concerned they were similar in purpose to what whores in back alleys wore, only made of better materials and cut to fit by a tailor.

"The evening was going well. There were about a half-dozen of his closest 'pals' there, and they were doing their usual eating and drinking — more of an emphasis on drinking than eating — and boasting of their exploits. I had more than my usual share of drinks as well, in part because I was anxious to confront my lover and clarify my status.

"It had gotten late and everyone was too drunk for their own good. The lights were low and the servants had gone to bed in the outbuildings. He stood up in the center of the room and asked everyone to stand gather round, which we did. It was clear he and his friends had planned this night in advance.

"He pushed me into the middle of the group and with a smirk on his face began telling his friends about the perverted things that we had done together. Even as insensible as I was, I blushed and I couldn't look anyone in the face. I just stood there with my arms at my side, looking at the floor, trembling.

"He told his friends to whisper what they were going to do to me into my ears, and they all came in close enough to put their mouths to my ears. Each of them took turns telling me what I was going to do for them. I was so frightened. And then they all started touching me. At first their hands were outside my gown, and then they started going under it. I tried to stop them, but they held on to my arms. I couldn't move as they were all gathered so close around me, and then I felt the tugging and pulling as my clothes were being ripped off right there in the room.

"Soon I was completely naked, trembling and trying to cover myself with my hands, when my 'lover' (if you could still call him that) declared that 'we need to teach the fisherman's whore a lesson she won't forget!"

"And then he let them have their way with me. One, two, three of them at a time. All of them, many times. They did horrible things to me, things that no human should do to another human. For the rest of the night they abused me, until they were all sated and finally fell exhausted into a drunken stupor.

"When they were finally finished with me, I crawled to my room, bruised, beaten, and covered with filth. They were brutes and had acted according to their natures.

"I think you know the end of the story."

Jason nodded in agreement, "Yes, I'm afraid I do. Why didn't you just come home? Even then, I would not have rejected you. "

Zoe shrugged her shoulders, knowing there was no answer, no way to express the depth of her despair that night.

Zoe finally spoke again.

"Jason, do you still love me?"

There was a telling hesitation as he considered before he answered.

"Yes, Zoe, I do, and I always will. I loved you beyond price, more than pearls or rubies, with all of my heart."