Jessica's Attic

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A guy, a girl, an attic, a decision.
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By Millie Teases, with thanks to Ben

When Ben came home from college after his freshman year he was a little in shock. In high school he'd always been one of the brighter kids -- not top of the class or anything, but a good student. Everybody in college was like him -- bright, intelligent, smart -- and he didn't really stand out all that much.

One area that really got his attention was that he didn't stand out at all with the women. Just like in high school, all the women seemed to want to date either the older guys or the guys that were aggressive jerks. Ben wasn't either -- in fact he was kind of shy, really. And there wasn't anybody like Jessica there to coach him either. In high school she'd always motivated him and reassured him that he was attractive to women -- even if the ones in their school did pretty much ignore him.

He and Jessica had known each other for what seemed like forever. They were friends -- and that's all. They'd both had thoughts about each other, but they never went anywhere with them. The thing both of them worried about, although they never said a word about it to each other, was that after sex, well, sex changed things -- it either improved love or killed it. Neither of them was willing to take the risk. And Jessica, well, Jessica had a boyfriend during high school, and it wasn't him.

Jessica hadn't gone to college. Her folks had put some money away, but the economy had gotten bad, and her dad's business wasn't doing that well, so she'd decided to stay home and work and save up the money to pay for radiology school on her own. It was a tough decision, but she knew it was the right one for her family.

Still, most of her friends left for college and it seemed pretty much like she was alone most of the time. And then the problem, of course, was that it was a really little town and there wasn't much to do. And when the asshole broke up with her, well, then there was even less to do.

About the middle of every June, after the schools closed for the summer, everyone on their block had a big barbecue. They'd drag a bunch of grills into someone's back yard, and the dads would cook, and some years they even barbecued a pig. It was a big deal -- everyone brought stuff, and people all were out in the yards and the kids all ran around and stuff. The best part of it this year, Ben thought to himself as he was getting ready for it, was that he'd get to see Jessica again.

Once he went out and started wandering around a little it didn't take long for him to find her. Jessica was running around with a camera, taking pictures of everybody like she always did. She'd get folks to pose for her, or get the kids to do goofy stuff. She'd even hide sometimes and take kind of candid shots. A couple of times over the years she'd gotten pictures of stuff she shouldn't -- like the year before last when she climbed up a tree and looked over a fence to see Mrs. Smith with her top pulled down and her skirt pulled up and Mr. Abercrombie kneeling in front of her licking her. She was on about the fourth picture before she realized what really was happening. Those pictures go erased pretty fast.

When Ben walked up to her she took a bunch of shots of him. He was a little surprised, but not totally. You couldn't always predict what Jessica was going to do.

"Hey there buddy, how's it going?" she asked him. She looked great -- her hair was brown again -- she'd died it blond for a while -- and straight, hanging just past her shoulders. She was wearing sandals, jeans and a white linen top that left her shoulders bare except for two little straps. It had a keyhole cutout between her breasts and when Ben glanced at it he noticed her bra was pink.

"Stop looking at my boobs, perv," she teased him when she noticed where he was looking.

Ben blushed.

"It's ok," she said quickly. "I'm just teasing."

"Ok," Ben replied.

"So, really, how have you been?" Jessica asked.

"Ok, I guess. I'm glad to see you again."

"It's good to see you, too," she replied. "It's been really boring around here."

"I guess," Ben replied. "I'm kind of glad to be home."

"Was college tough?"

"Yeah," Ben said. "Everybody's really smart and it took me a while to get used to living in the dorm and having to study without Mom yelling at me to buckle down and stuff. I survived. How about you? How's working at Dr. Smith's office?"

"It's ok, I guess. I'm saving some money, anyway. I mean, I just greet the patients and answer the phone and stuff, but I'm learning a little about how doctors work. It could be worse, I guess."

"I guess. So what else have you been doing?"

Jessica got quiet for a minute. "You heard about the asshole, didn't you?"

"Umm, yeah, kind of," Ben replied.

"That son-of-a-bitch was cheating on me almost the whole time we were going out. I caught him with Tiffany right after Thanksgiving. It turned out he'd been having sex with her for almost a year, and with others before that."

"That sucks, I'm really sorry," Ben said quietly.

"I gave him my virginity," Jessica said. "I thought I was going to marry him. That fucker."

"Geez, Jessica, watch your mouth, old Mrs. Harrison almost heard you."

Jessica looked around, blushing. "I'm sorry," she said. "It just makes me so mad."

"I understand," Ben said.

They didn't say much for a while after that, but just walked around the neighborhood sampling the different food folks had made and taking pictures. They both felt it was good to be back together. They wandered around and laughed when they got to the tree where Jessica had learned about one of the neighborhood affairs. Ben was the only person Jessica had ever told about what she had seen. They climbed up the tree, giggling, to see if anything was going on the yard this year. It was empty.

They climbed back down and talked and wandered and took pictures and got comfortable with one another again. They hadn't really talked to each other at all since Ben had left for college the August before. Ben was getting really comfortable being back, and being with Jessica.

"There's that look," Jessica said to him when they'd stopped in her back yard and were sitting on a bench on the patio. They were alone. She took a picture.

"What look?" Ben asked.

"That sweet look you have that would convince just about any woman to go out with you," she replied.

"Well, if I have a look like that it sure didn't work at school."

"Oh please," she said. "I bet lots of girls were after you. Tell me the truth Ben, you dated a bunch, didn't you?"

"Not at all, not really. I went out a few times with groups from the dorm, but that was it."

"Really?' she asked, with a strange look on her face.

"Really. And there was definitely no one like you."

"Yeah, like I've been going out a lot. Asshole broke up with me, everyone went off to college, and I've been here all alone for the last eight months. John Wiley made a pass at me in the doctor's office a couple of months ago, but god, he's pushing 30. I'd never date someone like him."

"And nobody else?"

"Nobody. Most of the guys our age who stayed here are asshole's friends. Most of them I wouldn't touch. The other ones, well, hell, none of them asked and I'm not going after them."

"I guess, but what do you do then? I mean, at college there's all the studying, and there's always a movie or something."

"Ask my cousin Joyce how many times we've been to the movies together. Or how many times I've babysat while she and her husband went out. I've been boring and it's boring. It drives me nuts some times."

"I guess it would."

"So," Jessica said, "If you didn't date, did you take care of things yourself?"

"Geez, Jessica," Ben said, blushing. "What kind of a question is that?"

"A perfectly frank one," she replied. "And one that I'm pretty sure I know the answer to since you told me years ago that you do it."

"Well, so do you," Ben replied. He remembered that conversation. Vividly.

"Of course I do," Jessica said, quietly. "I mean, well, you know. You just get that way and you have to do something about it."

"I guess," Ben said.

"You guess. You know. Sometimes you just have to take care of things. So I do."

"I guess I always figured you'd never have to," Ben said. "I mean, unless you wanted to. But that there'd always be some guy willing to, well, you know..."

"Yeah, like there's anybody here anymore I would do anything with. I told you, the ones that are still here are all asshole's friends. All the guys I liked...the guy I liked" she said very softly, "went away to college or somewhere else. I've pretty much been alone and having to take care of things by myself for months."

Ben heard her, but wasn't quite sure what she meant by 'the guy she liked.' He wondered who that could be.

"Rub my shoulders," Jessica suddenly demanded, turning her back to Ben.

"What?"

"Rub my shoulders -- you know you're good at it and I haven't had my shoulders rubbed in a long time." She pulled her hair around in front of her. "Now, please."

"Ok, I guess," Ben said. He was a little surprised, but not displeased. Rubbing Jessica's shoulders, and sometimes her back, was something he'd done for her when they were in high school. But usually it was through her clothes. There was one time when she was wearing her bikini when her mom and dad were out of town. But not many more than that.

Tentatively, he put his hands on her bare shoulders and began to squeeze and rub them gently. Her skin was soft and warm. He rubbed a little harder.

"Mmmh, that's nice," she said. "I missed your shoulder rubs."

"I kind of missed rubbing your shoulders, too," Ben said.

"Really?" Jessica asked.

"Yeah, really," Ben said, rubbing a little more.

They didn't say anything for a few minutes. Ben kept rubbing Jessica's shoulders, and down her back a bit. He kept thinking that he'd forgotten how smooth and soft Jessica's skin was, and how wonderful it felt to touch her.

"Thank god for the Internet," Jessica said turning around and breaking contact with Ben. Her shoulder straps had slipped down while Ben had been rubbing her, and she pulled them back into place.

"What do you mean?" Ben asked.

"I mean," Jessica replied, "There have been nights when I'm really glad that Dad pays for a good Internet connection and that I've got a computer in my room and it's not all that close to Mom and Dad's room."

"You look at Internet porn?" Ben was a little shocked.

"Not porn, erotica," she said.

Ben blushed.

"Like you never looked at stuff on the Internet," Jessica said to him.

"Umm, yeah," Ben admitted.

"So what do you like best?" she asked.

Ben looked around. He wasn't sure he wanted anyone else to hear this conversation. But, they were alone. Everyone else was out in front of the houses or down the block at the Waverly's where the grills all were.

"You tell me first," he replied.

"Well," she said, "I kinda like the first-time stories, and some of the romantic ones. And the ones where people almost get caught in the act. And I like the pictures of the guys." Jessica had always been pretty frank, so Ben wasn't totally surprised at her answer.

"Now you tell," she prompted.

"Well, he said, I like the first-time stories too, but mostly it just depends on my mood. And I really like when they have pictures of women in their clothes and then out of them. I kinda look for those a bunch."

"You mean, the ones where a woman is standing in front of a chair or on a porch or something, just in her regular clothes, and then in the same place, naked?"

"Yeah, those," he replied. "I guess it's kind of hot seeing a woman like she looks in public, then seeing her naked in the same situation."

"I guess," Jessica said. She was squirming a little.

"What else do you like," he asked her.

"Like I said, mostly stories. That way I can kind of imagine what the people look like and everything. If I look at a video I like ones with kind of a story. And ones where it seems like the people know and like each other. But sometimes," she said, blushing, "all I want to see is people hooked together...you know," she said almost whispering, "the ones where a man is inside a woman and you can see her kind of stretched open for him."

"Jessica, you don't."

"Only when I'm really, really horny," she said. "The rest of the time all I really want is something kind of romantic but with people having sex. And sometimes I just want to see pictures of guys with hard cocks. I think about how they would taste and feel inside me and stuff."

"Oh," Ben squirmed a little. He felt an erection starting and tried to hide it.

"And don't you do the same when you look at stuff?"

"Well, I guess so," Ben replied. "I mean, I think about what it would be like to be with some of the women, to see them dressed and everything, and then to watch them undress. Sometimes I like to guess what they'll look like, like, what their nipples will look like and if they shave or anything."

"Yeah, I kind of do that to if there's a picture of a guy dressed or not. Like how big his cock is and if the tip is going to be mushroom-shaped or kind of a different color or whatever. With the women, well, I guess I've found out that we're all kind of different."

"Yeah, I guess so. I mean some women have small, dark nipples and others have big pales ones, and sometimes you can see a clitoris, or they're just kind of closed up between their legs."

"Well," Jessica said with a smirk, "I guess that's kind of true. Some of the vulva stuff depends on how excited they are."

"Oh," Ben said. He was definitely getting hard. He wondered if the discussion was affecting Jessica any.

"So Ben," Jessica said with a teasing tone in her voice, "Do you shave?"

Ben didn't think he could blush any harder. He had, once, a few months before when he'd heard a girl from his dorm say one night, after they'd all been out and been drinking, that she loved shaved cock. He'd gone back to the dorm and locked himself in one of the shower stalls and shaved off all of his pubic hair. But when he'd asked the girl out, she'd turned him down. He felt kind of stupid, and had let it grow back.

"Once, but it's grown back now," he told her.

"I would have liked to have seen that," she smiled at him. "I just have a little triangle of hair above my clit. I do it for my bathing suit so nothing shows outside the legs. And, just for the record, my nipples are medium-sized and not quite brown."

"TMI Jessica," Ben replied.

"Nonsense," she replied, more confidently than she felt.

Ben's mind was racing. He was trying not to imagine what Jessica looked like nude. He wasn't having much luck.

"Ben," Jessica asked, still very quietly, "do you, you know, do you ever think of me when you're, you know..."

"Jessica, no!" Ben replied.

"Really?" she asked. "I've thought about you. I had this dream once. It was snowing and we had to get off the road and there was only one hotel room left. It was like right out of a movie. We were both kind of shy, but we ended up naked and making love and I remember I had a really big orgasm, and when I woke up I was all wet between my legs, and well, you know, every once in a while it pops into my head when..."

"God, Jessica, really?" Ben asked. He wasn't sure if he should be pleased, puzzled or just disturbed. Jessica was his friend. She'd never said anything about feeling that way about him. He couldn't imagine that she'd dreamed about having sex with him, much less that she masturbated to the memory of that dream.

"Yes Ben, I do. But I guess you've never thought about me that way," she said, sounding a little disappointed.

"Well, I guess I have," he admitted. More times than he ever wanted her to know, he thought to himself. In reality fantasizing about her was the one thing he did the most when he masturbated. He'd imagined her naked in all kinds of positions, doing all kinds of things with him. He was definitely erect now and only hoped that Jessica hadn't noticed.

"Good," she said, relieved. She didn't know how he'd react to the story about the dream. She'd never thought about Ben that way before having that dream. After, well, after and especially now that she wasn't dating anyone she thought about that dream a lot.

"So do you like the stories when people almost get caught?" she asked him, an idea coming into her head.

"I guess," he said. "Some of them are pretty good."

"I like the ones when the father almost catches them," she said. "My dad almost caught me and asshole a couple of times. I came like crazy then." She had. They'd been going at it one night in the family room after she'd thought her parents were in bed. Her dad had come down the stairs and gone into the kitchen for something to eat. Thank god they'd turned out the lights and the couch faced away from the open kitchen door. She's just pulled him down tight against her and, once her dad had gone back upstairs, it only took about three strokes before she was orgasming like she never had before. It had happened twice more and every time the orgasm nearly made her pass out.

"Geez, Jessica, why are you telling me these things?'

"I don't know," she replied. "I'm just in a mood. There's nobody in this town to talk to anymore and all I do is work and then I come home and if I'm alone sometimes I just get online and find a picture of a good looking guy and then read stories and play with myself. I just get so lonely."

"Well, I'm home for the summer," he replied.

"I know," she said, "but all I do is work, and you know there's nothing to do in this town. I mean, we could go to the movies or take walks and stuff, but you'll just go back to college in the fall and I'll be stuck here, trying to earn money for school. It sucks."

"I guess," Ben said, a little sad. He'd never really thought of his town that way. At least, not really. But he also knew that he probably wouldn't be coming back to it after college, other than to visit his folks. And by then Jessica probably would have saved up enough money to at least start radiology school, and he'd only see her at holidays and stuff when he came home to visit his folks. It would never be the same as high school, or even this afternoon and evening.

"Ben," Jessica said with a little look in her eye, "Would you do something for me?"

"What?" he replied. She had a look on her face he'd never seen before.

"Follow me," she said, leading him toward the side door of the house. "Don't let anyone see us."

Ben looked around. They were still alone in the backyard. He could hear folks around the neighborhood, but they were alone.

Quietly they went into the house. It was pretty much like most of the houses in the neighborhood -- they'd come in through the hall that was kind of a laundry room and walked through the kitchen into the front of the house. There was a family room off to the right that you could get to from the front hall and the kitchen, and a living and dining room off to the left. In all the years he'd known Jessica he'd never been upstairs in her house -- her parents were pretty strict about her not having male friends in her room, even when they'd been little kids.

Jessica led him up the stairs that were opposite the front door. At the top of the stairs was a hallway, with doors along it on either side. There were family pictures hanging on the walls. Ben saw that he was in one of them -- it was of Jessica and him and bunch of other kids, all at summer camp. At the end of the hall he could see a bathroom, and about halfway down a door that still had the nameplate on it they'd made in fifth grade art class. He tried to glance into the room as they went past, but the door was closed almost all the way.

Jessica grabbed him by the hand and pulled him down the hall towards the bathroom. Next to the bathroom door, at right angles to it, were two doors. One went into her parent's bedroom. The other one looked like it opened into a closet. Jessica pushed it open and pulled them inside.