Joanna's Contribution

A Contribution from Joanna: (as an adjunct to "Matt becomes Mattie").

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Mattie has asked me to consider writing something for you, the reader, especially about my experiences and feelings as regards the education that I have had from my now friend, Duncan.

I am not as emotional as Mattie and tend to write in a more matter of fact style focusing on the events and conclusions rather than the intricate detail that she so, successfully, weaves into her writing. So excuse me for this.

I want to start by giving a brief summary of the relationships involved and some background on me. As I write, Mattie and I have been married for eleven years. I met her (him) when we were postgraduates at a dinner party hosted by one of our mutual friends and was attracted to him because of his humour, education and sensitivity. He was also working in a business that I was interested in, albeit a different discipline. Matt wasn't your average Jock. We had a fairly short relationship before we were engaged and then married.

At the start of this new phase of life, our marriage was solid if not spectacular. Matt was a good breadwinner in his communications field and six years ago we managed to purchase a really nice cottage and buildings in a good lot just outside our village. With an increasing family, I was able to make this a nice nest for us and then worked from home, gradually building up more clientele and income from the company that I was contracted to. This I enjoyed as I had graduated with a first class degree in bio-chemistry from Durham and, at that point when I started up home-work in communications, I felt that I was not using my mind sufficiently.

We have been graced with two wonderful intelligent children whom I deeply love, but then what mother doesn't say that.

Not everything was perfect though and two years ago I would say that I am not sure our marriage would have stayed the test of time. Matt was somewhat distant, over-pressurised at work, not talking about his emotions and wasn't really that good in bed. He was, however, a brilliant father. We were also, I would say, good friends.

Our sex life was fairly miserable and I will admit that I too was partly to blame, especially after the birth of our second one. He would probably say that I was fairly boring too and saw sex as something perfunctory and, how can I phrase, it a reproductive process. Our sex was something that was not really discussed between us and when we did, it was all rather vanilla. We never covered what we liked, disliked and the subject of fetish, I think we both saw the other as seeing it as 'taboo'. Totally irrational for two intelligent people.

I came to realise this when I started to lose weight after my second child and realised I was overweight. I had been a 38c 32 40 and was too heavy. My breasts were too large and carrying too much fat and my bottom was massive. I was wearing size 16 (UK) clothing and I decided to lose weight. Eventually, I have come down to a 36b 28 37 and am now a size 8 to10. I have kept my young looks with my milky skin and for that I am grateful and my hair has no grey in it. I wear it in a short bob.

There were two realisations, firstly I much preferred wearing simple male-like clothes and plain underwear, and secondly, I had realised that my sex life needed a boost. I was seriously considering finding a better lover and or a female friend. I had enjoyed a lovely lesbian relationship in my hall, Castle, at Durham and missed the tenderness of the female body, the emotions involved and the intensity of mutual orgasms. I was largely what one would describe as the top.

That doesn't mean to say I didn't like men but I quickly realised that I am bi with a 'male' leaning in the way I like my sex and probably in mind too. I can easily separate fact and emotion. I wasn't that experienced only having had three boyfriends before Matt came along. I really did enjoy sex back in my late teens and early 20s and enjoyed some 'fetish' aspects but Matt and I never went there to explore such directions. I was happy with him though as life is all about balances.

Then the bombshell hit with Matt coming back from Vancouver and me discovering the panties. I was suspicious that he had been enjoying mine from time to time and I knew he had a weakness for lingerie. He was always looking at shops and furtive glances at magazines, other women, I had noticed pairs missing from time to time or the laundry basket having been turned over. I didn't really mind as, to the best of my knowledge or as a result of his good disguise and cover, he had always been faithful. When I went through his luggage to retrieve laundry, I found not only a pair of mine that I knew was missing, but another black lacy pair that were definitely not mine. And there were a pair of stockings.

I quietly went ballistic but then decided to look at our computer and some good digging in the cookies soon found that he had been looking at various crossdressing, transvestite and lingerie sites, not only for porn but for transformation information. I thought about this and gave him the benefit of the doubt but that this had to be aired with him. As I have indicated, I am more factually driven than emotional and, indeed, Matt was far more womanly in that regard.

The rest, as one says, is history and I will not repeat what Mattie has written except to say that she has had my full love and support. He was very brave in unloading his want to cross-dress and his other interests. And, as you know, I accepted his want to dress and outlined my wants. Firstly, that I wanted to find a girlfriend in addition to loving Mattie, secondly, that I wanted to assume control of Mattie in bed, and thirdly, I raised the subject of his endowment and that in time, and when we were, ready I wanted to experience some larger men in terms of their cock size, and also I would say, their make behaviour in bed. On the male front, I had always fantasised about large hard cocks.

After a couple of really good sessions with Mattie and the fun of exploring his sexuality, it dawned on me that the way forward was a role reversal between us. And how it has worked as my career has really taken off, back in the folds of corporate advertising. I enjoy my work, my clients and my fellow staff. I enjoy the pressure and the travel and I enjoy my time off. Mattie has been brilliant as a mother and wife and we have been lucky how the children and our families have adapted to her transformation. That has been a godsend for both of us.

I have thoroughly enjoyed the way the sex had developed between us, much more variety, better stimulation, proper orgasms and best of all open communications about sex between us.

And then came Louise, right on our doorsteps. We both cherish her not only for the sex she offers and her own individuality in that and what she has introduced me to, but, most importantly, as a person. She has a gorgeous, open and loyal personality and why no-one has swept her before, who knows, but it is to Mattie and my fortune that she is the third axe of our triumvirate. The kids so love her as well. I love her and I know Mattie does as well. For me, it is like having two wives to love and cherish. I am so lucky. I will say that night I discovered Louise, as a birthday present in the suite bondaged up and on the Tower, I was stunned. Mattie and she were very naughty but it was a brilliant move on Mattie's part. I liked her a lot but had no idea that she felt so deeply about me; it did not take long to love her intensely.

So, in conclusion of this first part, I have been so lucky and I love Mattie and Louise so much, a different love to my children. I would never want to lose them or risk losing. Even though I am the domme I will sound them out to their thoughts and will not risk putting our relationships at risk. They know that and they are also equally open with me about how they feel and want to develop.

That brings me onto Duncan, which is the main theme of this writing of mine. I thank Louise for introducing me to him. She and Mattie had discussed my longer-term want for a good man and the she had raised the subject when we went for a latex fetish weekend in Austria. Having gauged what I was looking for, she mentioned that she knew Duncan and that he could be a good candidate in the sense that he enjoyed sex, was known to be fairly perverted, well endowed and had no current lover. Most importantly of all, he was caring and could separate the act of love from pure unadulterated sex, which is what I wanted.

I re-emphasise to you that I can separate the sexual act as being a transactional one from sex in romance. On our first meeting in an Oxford pub, we closely explored that subject. His Middle Eastern wife had died some time ago tragically and since her death, he had explored his dominant side through being a bull in cuckold relationships and a range of fetish clubs and contacts. He talked about some of his experiences and scenario planning that he had been involved in.

He talked about his main interests being heavily dominant to women, extending their experience range, BDSM and associated with this piercings and chaining as well as heavy punishment to pain to pleasure sessions. He enjoyed voyeurism and sex parties. I asked him about what fantasies he had and he came out with two major ones, firstly to have a Middle Eastern or Middle Eastern looking girl as his sex partner and, secondly, to set her up as a high class 'escort' to selected clients (well as a 'lend out' to his friends) from many of the upper echelons of society in the Levant and the Gulf. Louise was aware of all of this and has played a very discreet role in keeping these conversations privy, leaving me to brief Mattie accordingly.

Apparently, he was primarily taken by my eagerness to learn and experiment. He liked that I was obviously intelligent and not emotional in my thinking. Also, that I wasn't a young thing; he commented that he found late 30s to early 40 women really appealing as they often retained their looks but were more willing to experiment, test themselves and, in doing so, seek out really good sex.

Physically, I appealed to him because of my dark hair though my bob was too short for him. He loved my youthful looks, dark brown eyes, my milky skin and full lips and later I learnt that my largish bottom, my breasts with their purplish pink nipples had registered his interest. And that I was completely waxed was a big appeal as well as my very prominent labia and clitoris when excited as well as my brown puckered anal entry. I could qualify as a light skinned Emirati girl.

Visually, Duncan is not what I would call an absolute stunner. He is a gentleman though and very caring at all times. He is very well educated and was an academic working on Middle Eastern politics working in Oxford. He came across as conservative and somewhat crusty. His hair is all their and his physique is in good condition. He is also healthy, clean and trim. He asked that of me as well and he checks up on all participants in his scenario plays.

Duncan is interesting to talk to and that is important for me too. On the sexual side, he does ask me to chat to him about what I liked, what I think of, what I do not like so that he can modify play accordingly.

Mattie has described the dinner with him and our first experiences with him. I must add that I was somewhat shocked when I saw the size of him for the first time, his gorgeous massive cock. He isn't ultra long at just over eight inches but his girth is huge and it really splits me in two. I believe his diameter is some two to two and a half inches. He also has lovely heavy large balls, a nice foreskin and lovely massive purplish helmet glans to his penis. He dwarfed Mattie and was very much what I was looking for.

He is also a magnificent lover and Mattie also enormously enjoyed her cuckolding, as he didn't just focus on me. She has been back some three times for cuckold sex and bondage. She, and Louise, is aware of most things that go on or are planned as he cleverly has involved them in my preparation and post-visit sessions.

However, his focus has been fourfold with me when we are one on one.

Firstly, that I am to be his cum-bucket and slut. When with him, I have to offer myself totally to him and be used and abused as he sees fit, not when I want to. The purpose of this is that he is in sexual control of me and that I am very much his sub. And in doing so, I can learn what it is to be sub and take plays and imagination back to Mattie and Louise.

Secondly, within this first parameter, I will enact out the role of a Middle Eastern woman. I understand that his wife had been very devoted and ceded herself to him. However, he felt that, because of her Coptic background, he could not develop her out to the extent he sought and indeed his previous relationships had fallen short of the fourth parameter. Less so Coptic, but certainly the Arabic culture isolates the woman from childhood and especially puberty through to her presentation to her husband; there was no western style of going out with boys. Traditional society sexually dictated that what was at stake was not mutuality between partners but the adult male's achievement of pleasure through domination. Female sexuality, if unsatisfied or uncontrolled, could result in social chaos (fitna) and social order thus required male control of women's bodies.

A Middle Eastern woman who disregarded the above and ventured outside her husband for another man or woman would be discarded from family and society. However, Duncan's perversion of this is to offer a western woman, masquerading as being Middle Eastern, and a chance to become sexually open to him and, perhaps a creative idea in his mind, to all those partners he selects, and such a fetish oriented woman would be highly cherished by his Arabic friends.

Thirdly, my commitment to him is that, in the above as a sub, I am to be made available in whatever manner and to whom he deems fit at sex parties and of what persuasion in terms of fetish. Nothing, other than blood and children is taboo to him and he encourages me to participate to increase my experiences. However, he will respect my limits as he did when he first proposed pony play early on and I said no and he objected very strongly when someone at a party suggested cutting and tattooing me. These interventions, combined with his familiarisation and training techniques, give me a lot of confidence and trust in him.

Fourthly, that I am now to be his 'escort'. This did not really surface early on, only when he had confidence in me and vica versa. I find that his is a fascinating area that has just begun in earnest and I do find it very exciting as a play as power rests with him as my pimp and my 'clients.' I haven't be traded out on a whim off the phone but rather he has approached people that he knows and offers me to them on a total temporary power exchange in return for hard considerable money. But again he knows them or they have to have very good references from a close friend and have to certify their health.

Mattie has described the pre-requisites I have to meet before arriving at Duncan's house and also including the humiliation of being walked up the street ready for service and invariably leashed. There are just seven major pre-requisites inside his house.

• I was always to be called يُوَنّا Yuwannā (the Arabic for Joanna) in his house or outside with him

• I must accept to wear any clothing or lingerie of his choice. To that end, he had already furnished me with various Abaya's, Hijabs, shawls Arabic style dresses, a wedding gown and Burqas in traditional colours and a variety of fetish materials. He also had a stock of traditional gold jewellery for me to wear as well

• My default was to be hooded and he had acquired a selection of hoods for this purpose.

• All my orifices are at his disposal as he sees fit and even during menstruation.

• I must accept all bondage, chastisement, punishments and insertions of anything into me

• No condoms are to be used in sex with me by Duncan or any man of his choosing so I need to ensure I am fully protected by the pill

• No action of mine can be behind close door, including my toilet.

There is one thing in common with his sex plays and that is I must be stretched in my pussy, anus and mouth to be able to take extra-large or long cocks, toys and fists. To that end, he has been spending considerable time in opening me up so that I can easily receive such impressive 'weapons.' His logic is that once I am fully opened up, for the rest of my life I will always sexually require and seek such priapuses, or be focused on sex with women for my own pleasure.

I am also combining this with various daily exercises and a vaginal strengthening bar bell to strengthen my kegels on my pelvic floor. This will gradually give me more vaginal control, ultimately leading to better 'masturbation' of a cock and in the strength of my orgasms.

As Mattie has described, on his request, I have been pierced under my clitoris and also four heavy silver rings are inserted in my labial lips, two either side at the entrance to my pussy. Duncan has also suggested the surgical removal of my labia minora down to the rings to suggest a circumcision, so common in females of Middle East society. Mattie and Louise do not know that and I am thinking about this sculpturing. It is the whole thing about only to be focusing on the man's cock for rendering my sexual pleasure but the further removal of my clit for a true circumcision would be a stage too far for me. He knows that and hasn't asked me about it.

As my 'part 2 onwards' covers some of my history and experiences with Duncan, there have also been one or two other changes and I shall hold those back as part of the history.

To formalise all of these conditions, he had me sign a contract outlining the conditions and his access to me. This was a well structured document as it allowed Mattie, Louise, my children, family and my work to come first, but once I step out of my house to come to him, I am at his disposition and authority. It is very clear that love does not enter the equation, just the terms respect and total trust, and that any money transactions will be from him to me at the rate of 35 per cent of gross as to sharing the spoils of his pseudo-prostitution of me, and that these pecuniary matters are for the purposes of escorting and that any act of sex between my clients and I is a matter of mutual agreement. Tips stay with me.

Part 2.

After the first night with Duncan, when Mattie was present, my early 'training' was focused on serving him and fairly vanilla to the above. He wasn't easy to accommodate and, especially, I found him enormous in my bottom and in my mouth. I admit to gagging on him and it took some practice to be able to take him deep throat. He did this by teaching me technique, practice and chastisement.

His other plays have been designed so as to test my ability to take bondage and punishment, leading ultimately to my pleasure and my mainly overnight stays were highly orgasmic. He has had me cumming and cumming like I have never done before, and this is even allowing for the fact that I have been highly sexed with Mattie and Louise. Returning home, I always need sleep. Bondage started off a bit like what I have practised with Mattie and Louise but he is a true master of the art, especially in the use of chains and ropes and gradually he has even raised it now to suspension. This is often combined with intense play and punishment of my body and love orifices and on many activities I have struggled to meet his standards, resulting in either cajoling and encouragement or heavier punishment to make me comply. He knows my body so well and what I can notionally take or be pushed to take.