Kendra's Knees Buckle

CHAPTER 1

Riding on the 8:17 into London, Jo Hart watched the broad shouldered blond guy approach down the aisle and resumed painting her finger nails, timing the brush strokes with the sway of the carriage.

The guy stopped, picked up her handbag that lay beside her on the outside seat and tossed it on to the floor beside her feet and sat down.

"Hey what are you doing? That's my handbag."

"Young lady I paid for a ticket to ride this train seated. Did you buy a full fare ticket to ride your handbag on that seat?"

"Of course not."

"Then stop your bitching."

Jo was furious but suspecting it was a confrontation she was unlikely to win, she attempted to shrink away from him and continued with her nails.

Now the asshole was watching what she was doing.

"Stop watching?"

He made no reply and kept on watching.

She was livid.

The guard came through and Jo called, "This rude man is staring at me doing my nails."

"Sir please be polite to this young lady."

"She'd not lady. Move her to another seat will you."

"How dare you," Jo flared.

"Which of you was seated first?" asked the guard diplomatically.

Jo said with a superior air, "I was."

The guy lied and said was seated first and when she arrived the pushy girl had demanded the window seat.

"You two sort it out will you?" said the guard and walked off, checking his watch.

Jo gave the insufferable guy a withering look and he winked at her.

He winked. She couldn't believe it.

She put away her nail varnish and they both sat staring straight ahead for the remainder of the journey to her stop at Bethnal Green Station.

The guy followed her out of the carriage but so did probably thirty other people.

Jo hurried off, not looking back. She turned sharp left on exiting the station and was \confronted by an unshaven guy with strong body odor. He grabbed her handbag.

She hung on to the dislodged shoulder strap with all her strength.

The guy grunted, "Let go or I'll punch out your lights."

"Go to hell."

Someone brushed past Jo and smacked the asshole with an almighty punch over the heart and the hoodlum drooped like a stone and lay groaning.

Her white knight grabbed Jo by the arm and waved down a taxi and said, "Come on unless you wish to be talking to cops for the next hour giving your lying statement."

"You?" she yelled.

The guy opened the back door of the taxi, pushed her in hard and followed her in and kissed her.

"That's assault," she yelled.

"My daughter is having her monthly," the guy said, using the tone guys use to guys when putting down women. "Tell the driver where you wish to go darling."

Jo gave the name of her destination without thinking and then swore.

"Yeah my missus swears too but usually only when she's on heat," said the driver.

Jo snorted through her nose to indicate repulsion.

Her savior handed five pounds to the driver and pulled Jo out of the taxi.

"Well I suppose I should say thank you?"

He blue-eyed her and smiled and said he supposed so.

"That was wonderful what you did for me. Thank you. Would you like coffee?"

"Please."

She said she worked nearby. They crossed the street to Lucy's joint she called a café. Well perhaps it could pass for a café.

"Two coffees Jo?" asked the jaded woman behind the bar and Jo grunted and paid. She walked to a window table ahead of the guy who obviously had been staring at the backs of her legs because he said great legs.

"Thank you Lucy. When seated she said, I'm Jo Hart and you are?"

"It's of no consequence to you but I would like to see if you really can smile. You have been so bitchy this morning."

Jo gave up on the idea of trying to kick ass and smiled.

"That's better and you'll feel better."

Surprisingly, she did feel better.

"Would you accept a reward for dealing with that would-be thief and thereby saving the loss of my cash, my business cards, my keys and especially my Little Black Book that is so import to me?"

"No."

"Oh I wonder why I'm not surprised. Then will you meet me for lunch?"

"No for dinner and I'd like you to cook for me."

"When," she asked nervously.

"Whenever you feel like unbending. You are so uptight."

She flared. "Well you'd be uptight if your boyfriend had just dumped you."

"Excuse me but I don't have boyfriends of the intimate kind."

She couldn't help it. She giggled.

And that made her feel even better.

"I live in Fenton and share a flat with another female. I couldn't bring you into our home without knowing who you are and knowing something about you."

"I live in Aston Meadows."

"Oh one station closer to the city and that's a swanky place."

"But there are no meadows because of bloody urban sprawl. Still it's better than where I used to live abroad."

"Where?"

"Here and there."

"Oh in the business capitals of the world?"

"Actually I was with the Army."

"Oh."

He frowned and she shut her mouth thinking perhaps that surprised oh was taken as an insult.

"I'm nineteen."

"I'm forty."

"Oh same age as my... um... my flatmate."

He looked bemused and asked had she forgotten her flatmate's name and she said no of course not.

She said pointedly, "You know my name."

"I'm Mac McLaughlin."

Jo thought it was like extracting water from stone but slowly she was getting somewhere.

"What is your role in the Army?"

"I'm ex-Army. I was instructed to shoot naughty people before they shot us. It's called peacekeeping."

She lowered her head and grinned as the coffee came, quite a bit slopped on the saucers.

"Thanks Meg."

"We don't usually deliver to tables but mom told me to do it because you were with a gentleman."

"He's no... um he used to shoot people."

"Holy shit."

Jo said kindly, "Thanks Meg."

Mac looked at Jo closely.

"You are both defensively and aggressively developed for such a young person."

She flared and asked what the hell did that mean and was told precisely what he'd said.

"Are you attempting to come on to me?"

He said no, that he'd be too big for her.

"That's so fucking vulgar," she snorted and was told he'd meant in body weight and she began giggling and apologized for being so rude to him after having misinterpreted what he'd been trying to say.

"That's fine and your mistake is understandable. I should have said when making the comment I would be too heavy for you. Do you fuck indiscriminately?"

Jo dumped two sugars into her coffee and stirred and then said defiantly, "Yes."

"See what I mean about being defensive? You ought to have said yes in a normal tone."

"I responded like that because you were prying."

He was blue-eyeing her again, his eyes crinkling in the corners to show the birth of a smile.

"Is that so? I bet the egg from my pet rooster to your ten pounds that you are beside yourself wanting to know what I do for a job in civilian life and am I married with kids and how much money I have?"

"Roosters don't lay eggs."

"Yeah well there's no way you'd give me a tenner in losing that bet."

"I had wondered if you were married."

"There's no way I'd marry you, a 21-year old."

"I'm almost twenty."

He appeared ready to duck under thrown coffee and asked, "Are you a prostitute?"

Jo sniffed and said no, an entertainer.

"Please explain the difference."

"I work for an agency across the street. Bored businessmen phone in for a girl to go to their office to pull them out of their Blues and that usually means wifey is not giving it to them. So I go in, he locks the office door and I offer to jerk him off, or to sing or dance or to blow him off. The jerk costs him fifty pounds, a sing and dance twenty-five and the blow job is seventy-five."

"Ah but why is the sing and dance the cheapest when technically both arts require greater skill than the jerk and blow?"

"Because I can't sing and dance very well but I do the partial strip okay."

He grinned.

"The blowjob costs more because most guys have a smelly crotch."

Mac rolled his eyes and Jo say sorry but it was the truth.

"Do you have a good telephone technique and can you write legibly?"

"Does that mean write good enough so people can read what I write?"

"Yes."

She replied yes.

"Our business is picking up. We need an office assistant because we are losing business by relying on an answer phone when we have our mobile phones switched off when with clients or whatever."

"I could be interested. Blowjobs or jerk-offs would cost you guys."

"What if I were to say my partner is a woman?"

"They still liked to be blown or jerked off."

Mac looked quite astonished and made Jo smile when he said he didn't know that.

"Mrs Francis is an ex-cop who worked for years in the fraud squad and her husband is our forensic scientist. She and I have half share in Sapphire Private Investigations."

"I bet she named the business."

"Correct. I bought into the company when she advertised for a partner. We only work for Government agencies, companies and other business enterprises hit by asset striping, cyber fraud, espionage and sabotage. She'd lifted business volume after being inducted into a Rotary Club and made wonderful contacts."

Jo asked what did Rotary Clubs do and nodded hesitantly when Mac smiled and said rotate.

She fiddled with her coffee cup and asked why should she work for him.

"My guess is because you don't have advanced educational qualifications you haven't be able to find a proper job and you lie to your mom you work in an office."

"How the hell do you know that? Has my mom been talking to you and has my agent dubbed me in to you?"

Mac pulled the cup and saucer away from her before she wore the glaze off the cup.

"Now is it likely I know both your mom and your agent?"

"Not at all likely but I had nothing else to go on. It's impossible for you to be that smart."

He sighed and said, "The dumber you think you are the dumber you get."

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?"

"I prefer you to answer my question, would you like a real job?"

"I might."

He grinned and continued patiently. "Mr Francis could probably subsidize your wages if you jerked him off each lunchtime."

Jo smiled and said actually he was quite funny.

Mac said seriously, "On that occasion I wasn't being funny. My partners Mrs Francis had a boyfriend who leaves her practically legless."

"You?"

"Jesus Jo, give me a break. Mrs Francis is sixty-six."

"Are women still interested in sex at that age?"

Mac smiled and said he had the impression Mrs Francis thought she was and Jo said he really did have a great sense of humor, even when serious.

That evening Mac went by cab to the address Jo had given him. She answered the doorbell dressed in very little and with her hair combed and looked quite pretty. So when he handed her the two bottles of wine and she stood with her hands full Mac kiss her and squeezed a tit.

"Are you interesting in getting it from me?" she asked in surprise.

"No, you just enchanted me by looking rather sweet and girlish tonight, that's all."

She nodded and said she would come and work for Sapphire but he wasn't to say anything about that to her mom.

"I'm unlikely to meet your mom.," he said and she just sniffed.

Mac handed Jo his handkerchief and she sniffed, giggled and said she didn't have a cold. She just sniffed when nervous.

He decided not to ask what was making her nervous, thinking that most likely would intensify her nervousness.

They entered the living room just as a woman around Mac's age came from the kitchen. She was rather beautiful and had stunning knockers and that was something Mac never over-looked, being focused by his fetish.

"Mac McLaughlin this is my flktxmtmat."

That last word was indecipherable.

The woman smiled and said, "Hi, I'm Kendra Hart, Jo's mother.

Mac's jaw dropped and Jo darted off to the kitchen.

"Hi Mac. If you don't mind me saying so, don't you think you are rather old for Jo?"

"It's not like that. We have sat together on the train and I stopped a guy from attempting to snatch her handbag outside the railway station this morning when we arrived in the city. I think she invited me to dinner to thank me."

"Omigod a bag-snatcher. I'm so glad you intervened. What did you do?"

"I stopped him."

"But those guys are evil, determined and very quick."

"I was trained to immobilize scum but please don't dwell on that. These things happen. You have wonderful breasts."

"What?"

"You have a wonderful breadth of er understanding about the little problems that worry us in the big city environment that can, er, only get better with increased policing."

"Oh for a moment.... well yes, you are so right."

Kendra called, "Jo please come out and be with our guest."

Joe arrived with an opened bottle of wine and three glasses, looking ready to be pilloried but in fact nothing was said.

The threesome drank, had dinner and drank more wine and then had dessert and liqueurs.

They sat of a sofa together and Kendra said, "Coffee Jo."

Jo giggled drunkenly and said what's coffee?

They giggled and even Mac in his melancholic mood thought that was funny.

He opened his arms and the two females giggled and fell against him and he thought that was very okay until Jo unzipped him.

Jesus.

Mac jumped to his feet, smiled and said he must go.

"This, this is so s-sudden," Kendra said huskily, drawing a hand across a breast softly.

Mac thought she was ripe for shafting but not in front of her daughter.

"I must go," he smiled warmly. "It was a lovely evening, great fare and company and I so very much enjoyed meeting you."

"Me," Kendra said looked quite bewildered. And then sounding a little softer said, "But no one is interested in me, a divorced woman."

Mac had news for her but decided now wasn't the time to deliver it.

"Bye," Jo said, kissing him. "I'm glad you have seen where I live. I'll see you on the 8:17 in the morning."

"Bye," Kendra said, standing and swaying a little. "It was lovely having you visit."

"I loved it," Mac said, staring at them and hoping she'd notice.

"Take care," Kendra said and stepped behind her daughter.

Mac was very happy.

Kendra's face had turned fire engine red.

She knew!

Jo greeted him warmly on the train next morning.

"That was a great night. This morning mom couldn't stop talking about you."

"What about her suspecting I have been doing more with you than riding beside you to work."

"No she mentioned she'd accepted your assurance you hadn't touched me. God mothers can be so embarrassing when they go overboard with parental concern. Actually she said you were sexy and had eyed her up."

"Eyed her up? What the hell does that mean?"

Jo giggled and said, "You tell me. I bet she'd be a really good poke."

"Jo," Mac said aghast. "You can't talk about your mom like that."

She said that she'd just had done so and they laughed.

"Well buddy," Jo sniffed. "It's over to you. She's all hot, waiting for it."

Mac quenched the urged to retort that Jo didn't know what she was talking about but he didn't believe she was way off beam.

He sniffed.

Mac called his partner about having found a possible office assistant. He turned to Jo and, placing his hand over the phone microphone, said Mrs Francis could see her this morning.

"Fine. I have only a guy booked in for a jerk at 9:30. I could be with her by 10:30.

The interview was arranged. Jo wrote something on the back of a receipt and handed it to Mac. "Here's my mom's school office number. Phone her."

He looked at her. "I can't."

"Just say you are calling to thank her for last night's hospitality."

"Oh yeah."

"And if she's wanting you between her legs she'll suggest something."

"Like what?"

"Christ Mac, I have no idea. It's mom who's out to have sex with you, not me."

Mac cringed and sniffed.

They parted outside the station, kissing, and a little over an hour later while on the phone Mac saw Jo enter the office. He waved but she didn't see him and one of the investigators questioned Jo at the counter and took her to Pam Francis.

Jo got the job and was introduced to the three other ex-police women and Mrs Francis' husband Jack who was collecting empty teacups.

Jo then came over to Jack and said thanks, that Mrs Francis had said she'd been told Jo didn't have a work record because she'd only just dropped out of university and her bag had been snatched and her academic records and CV were in the bag.

Mac grinned and Jo smiled, "God you are a liar."

Mac scratched his neck said it was more important that she got the job.

Jo said Mrs Francis had sighed and said it really did not require post high school education to answer telephone calls and if Jo ever lied again about having her bag snatched she'd be dismissed for lack of integrity.

"How the hell did she know it was a lie my documents were in my bag that was snatched?"

"Mrs Francis served forty years as a frontline policewoman. She can sniff a liar at forty passes and probably knows your bra size, when your panties were last washed and that you specialize in sucking cock."

"Omigod then why did she hire me?"

"Because I told her if she didn't I'd tell Jack the identity of her boyfriend."

"Who's Jack?"

"This guy who's bringing in fresh tea, her husband."

"But you said her husband was a forensic scientist?"

"He is and we're a flexible team around here. My chief job is breaking and entering to gather evidence and squeezing confessions out of lying suspects. I also empty trash cans and I clean the office windows but thank god Jack cleans the urinal."

"I-I cannot believe this. The name Sapphire screams out that it's a sophisticated private investigation business with the tight team of highly trained professionals."

"Have you been reading our Yellow Page ad?"

"No."

"Well our ads say something like that. But can't you understand we have to cut costs while building the business and so someone has to clean the toilets, the windows and take their turn one night a week sweeping and dusting the office? We all have chipped in part of our salaries so that Pam could not only employ you but pay you."

"God I had no idea that's how business operates."

"Jo this is England," Mac said proudly.

He then said it was approaching lunchtime. "Sweetie go on to the streets around here and watch what young women coming out of offices are wearing. They will be wearing a range of clothes and you should dress roughly like them. I suggest that wearing that little black skirt short enough to expose your stocking tops when you are walking and a T-shirt with the words 'I Suck' emblazoned on the front would have confirmed to Mrs Francis that you are indeed dedicated to cock-sucking and I know she will have expected me to have a quite word with you and I'm doing that right now."

"Omigod, thank you for your advice Mac. I hadn't really given a thought as to how I should fit in with the office scene in Whitechapel."

"It won't take much adjustment and being young it will be acceptable for you to show plenty of covered leg but of course not the bottom of your arse."

"Right. Well I'll see you tomorrow. A kiss please."

Mac kissed her and squeezed a tit to give the watching ex-cops the urgent to arrest him.

"Bye Jo."

"Bye Wendy," Jo said in surprise.

"Bye Jo."

"Bye Margaret."

"Bye Jo."

"See you in the morning Lydia."

"Yes dear. I suggest you dress with a less tartish look now you'll be working here. This place is not a brothel."

"All taken care of Lydia. Mac is already anxious to get me out of these clothes."

She smiled and winked at Mac and left, aware the three ex-cops were now narrowly eyeing Mac, their mouths tightening.

Jo arrived home and walked into the bathroom with a gin and tonic with a slice of floating lemon for her mom who was in the bath. Jo eyed the beautiful breasts and her mouth watered and she wished her mom would not push her away whenever she moved to suck them.