Lady Hideaway Ch. 08

Conner met her eyes again and she simply smiled and sat up. He opened his arms for her and Tessa sank against him as her arms wrapped around his neck while his hands traveled down her back. She felt his erection, hard and warm against her belly through his boxers and pressed her body against it, trapping his organ between their bodies. Conner responded by pulling her closer, kissing her face as he sought her mouth with his again.

Tessa kissed him back, her hands traveling down his sides. She felt him shiver as he deepened the kiss. Her hand moved between their bodies, her fingers working past the elastic band of his underwear and wrapping around his velvety shaft, her thumb sliding over the head of his organ as it twitched in her grip.

Tessa found herself pushing her hips forward, still feeling the pressure deep in her lower belly and the ache in her wet member as Conner cupped her breasts, rolling her erect nipples as he kissed and suckled her neck. Tessa squeezed his organ again, just gently as her other hand moved around him, down the back of his shorts as she urged them down to his thighs.

She started to push Conner back, and he followed her lead, kicking of his boxers as she straddled him, her mouth descending on his chest in soft kisses, just lightly grazing his nipples with her teeth while she continued to fondle his male appendage. She felt him shifting beneath her, bringing her the satisfaction that she was doing something that made him feel good.

Conner's hand made it's way back between her thighs, causing her to gasp as he found her tiny nub, rolling it against his thumb, causing her to wriggle above him. His finger entered her, nearly throwing her over the edge as he thrust it into her. She sat up as she felt her body clench around him in a small climax. It happened fast, she might have seen it coming, she wasn't sure. But for a small climax it felt wonderful, yet left her craving more.

Tessa looked surprised as she looked at Conner again, he looked amused and she blushed. Conner smiled, and then suddenly gripped her hips and pulled her up, placing his organ against her member, stretching her swollen lips as she slid up his shaft.

Conner sat up, wrapping his arms around her, crushing her breasts against his chest as he attacked her mouth with his, thrusting his tongue against hers. He held her bottom and rocked her on his lap, coating his organ with her juices. His shaft brushed against her sensitive nub again, drawing soft sounds from Tessa's throat as she held onto him, her breathing becoming more strained. Tessa kissed his face, down his jaw line and up where her tongue briefly fluttered against his ear. She spotted the box of condoms just behind Conner and reached for them as his hand moved to her breast, pinching her nipples and sending a flurry of sensations through her again.

Tessa didn't remember the actual event of opening the box of condoms, but once she had one little packet in her hand she found herself staring at it as Conner's lips closed around her nipple and she arched her chest up. She could feel every tiny sensation he was sending through her body, and she loved it. But the condom seemed to be a distraction as she held onto it.

The condom made things feel final. Real. Tessa knew she was ready, especially with Conner, but something suddenly felt frightening. She couldn't figure out what it was. She had trained herself to keep the attack out of her mind whenever Conner touched her. That's what she was doing now, so it wasn't that. She trusted Conner. He wouldn't hurt her. She loved him. Maybe that was it. She loved him, and somehow she knew that after this she would never survive if any of her doubts about his sticking around came to pass. She didn't want to lose him.

Conner drug her out of her thoughts as he kissed his way up her neck and his lips landed on her mouth. Tessa closed her eyes and kissed him back. Her fingers fumbled with the condom wrapper. She wondered if Conner knew that she even had it. Probably. While she was off in her own world he had been there with her the entire time, she could feel that much. She decided that from now on she'd try to stay in reality with Conner too, she'd feel guilty otherwise.

Damn condom wrapper.

She couldn't get it open. She needed it open. Her entire body felt warm, her member ached and she needed Conner. She needed to feel his hot organ which was now sliding against her member, inside of her. She wanted to feel him there. She wanted to feel him everywhere. But first she had to get the condom open.

Tessa broke the kiss and looked down at her fumbling hands. It was the first time she realized that she was trembling. But that didn't stop her from trying to tear the wrapper once again. She stopped when Conner's hand suddenly closed over both of hers. She lifted her eyes and looked at him, her face flushed, her eyes glassy. He smiled at her, and it almost immediately put her at ease.

She let him take the condom and her arms slipped over his shoulder as she leaned forward and gently kissed his mouth and a calm came over her as she rested his forehead against his. She looked down just as Conner removed the condom from the wrapper. Tessa moved slightly and watched as his erection sprang up between them. It shined with her juices and the very thought made her blush, it also made her feel rather giddy as she glanced at Conner and saw that he was looking at her. They both smiled before looking down again.

Tessa watched with curious fascination as Conner slid the clear rubber down his shaft. She wanted to touch, Help, something. But at the same time she just wanted to watch. She felt the anticipation rising in her again, and once she met Conner's eyes she could see the same thing there.

"Ready?" he asked. She noticed something different in his voice. It seemed deeper, huskier. She liked it. She felt like she wanted to hear it all the time. The sound sent a flutter through her chest and she bit into her bottom lip as she nodded. "We can take our time." Conner continued.

God he was sweet, Tessa thought. But she figured they had all weekend to take their time. She wanted to feel him. Now. So she responded by lifting his sheathed organ and guiding it to her entrance. Conner's arms wrapped around her, under her bottom as he helped her into position. He wasn't sure that having her straddling him the way that she was seemed like the best idea, she was tight, he knew that much. But something told him that this was the way Tessa needed it to be, and hell if he was about to complain.

Tessa began to move down as he slowly thrust upwards. She gripped his shoulders and closed her eyes as he kissed her again. She loved kissing him, she loved the way it felt. But at the moment, the kiss was not what was on her mind. She felt the head of his erection slide into her entrance, between her folds as they spread for him, the unmistakable feeling of just being slightly stretched as he began to enter her, her body soft and wet, welcoming him as he began to fill her. She slid down slow, wanting to feel all of it, wanting to remember every second. She heard a soft moan as he continued to fill her, but she wasn't sure whom it had come from, it didn't seem to matter, and then he was in. He had entered her. He had filled her. She felt like she was on the brink of her release again, and for a moment she stayed there with Conner.

Their arms were wrapped around each other tightly, her head rested on his shoulder and she could feel his ragged breathing on her neck. The thin layer of perspiration between them stung, and her back felt cold where his arms weren't touching; yet the room seemed twenty degrees warmer. She felt lightheaded. She wasn't sure how long they were there like that. Her breathing sounded loud in her ears compared to Conner's voice when he softly spoke to her.

"Tessa? Are you alright?"

She hugged him tighter and nodded against his neck.

"It feels good." Tessa sighed.

"Yeah." Conner agreed.

"I just want to stay like this for a minute." She whispered, "I never want to forget how this feels."

Conner kissed her head and rubbed her back caringly before he released a small chuckle.

"I can remind you any time." he replied. Tessa laughed and lifted her head to look at him. His features seemed slightly strained and that made her laugh more. "You're killing me here." He said with a sheepish grin, flexing his organ in her body.

Tessa smiled and kissed his nose before resting her forehead against his again. She lifted herself up the length of his shaft and then moved down again, locking onto his eyes as he released a restrained groan. Conner's hands moved to her thighs and he held her as they began to slowly move together. Tessa's legs wrapped around him as he held her up and their hips rocked together. The friction in her member was only adding to her ache, yet reliving it at the same time. Her fingers wandered into Conner's hair, cupping the back of his head as she pulled him to her and his tongue plunged into her mouth, thrusting in the same slow manner which his organ repeatedly penetrated her.

Their bodies moved into a slow build, and then as they began to rock quicker, Conner suddenly braced Tessa and guided her back onto the mattress, holding her legs around him as he continued to thrust into her in longer strokes. His hands moved over her breasts and cupped her bottom as his thrusting tongue stifled her moans and she lifted her hips to meet every stroke.

Tessa felt a familiar contracting in her muscles and she suddenly slid her hands down his body, gripping his ass and tightening her legs around him, urging him deeper. Conner arched his back and groaned as her body clenched around his member, her juices coating him, her cheeks flushed as her head dropped back onto the pillow with one last small cry. Conner looked down at her and with one last thrust he spent himself into the condom and avoided collapsing onto Tessa in fear of crushing her. But as he carefully settled over her, her arms were ready to pull him closer, holding him to her in an effort to keep them both warm while their skin cooled against the air conditioner and sent them both shivering.

After a few minutes had passed Conner carefully withdrew his soft organ and kissed Tessa slowly before leaving to the bathroom to clean up. He returned to find her under the covers, eyes closed and still. He smiled to himself as he climbed under the blanket with her. Without opening her eyes she rolled her body against his and he wrapped her in his arms again, closing his own eyes.

"I love you Tessa."

He felt her lips softly kiss his chest, and not long after he was asleep. ...............

Tessa glanced briefly at the clock on her nightstand. It was hardly five thirty in the morning. Saturday morning. She should still be asleep, but she couldn't sleep. But it wasn't for any of the normal reasons. No nightmares, nothing. She had simple awakened, full of energy. So much energy that she felt like she could get up and do some serious house cleaning, anything to get moving. But she didn't want to. That would mean leaving the bed, the one she was sharing with Conner. She didn't want to go anywhere.

Unfortunately her immobility combined with the rush of energy she had awakened with gave her little to do other than think. She never thought thinking could be so difficult, but her thoughts seemed to be rushing through her mind all at once, flooding her with mixed emotions. At the top of the list was a feeling of contentment. She felt closer to Conner than she had before, than she had to anyone before. All night long she knew that they had been touching in one way or another, and even now as she rested her head on his shoulder, her hand was lightly moving up and down his chest, lifting with every breath he took.

"I love you too Conner." She whispered. And she did. She loved him. What it meant frightened her. It meant that she had to make a choice. She couldn't just love Conner, it wouldn't be enough. She would have to show him.

Tessa trusted Conner, and she had to show him that too. She couldn't just trust him with her body, she would have to trust him with everything. Secrets. Fears. She had to talk to him, but not now. Then again, maybe now would be a good time, she thought. Conner could sleep through anything. Maybe if she could tell him everything while he couldn't hear her it would be easier, just to see how it felt. But she didn't. She would have to talk to Conner soon though, she knew that much.

There were other things that Tessa had to do too. She needed to give him more. Do more, and not just for Conner, for herself too. She needed to trust herself as much as she trusted Conner. She needed to push certain fears aside and she needed to move forward with her life. In her relationship with Conner. She wanted to move forward. Maybe she was ready.

Tessa propped her chin on his shoulder and just watched him sleep for a while through narrowed eyes. She wished that he'd wake up. But she let him sleep; it was early, after all. Conner wasn't a morning person, especially not a five thirty in the morning person. And besides, he looked so peaceful and content that she didn't have the heart to wake him.

Tessa was just about to get up, maybe go downstairs and check on Desy. She hadn't seen him since dinner the night before, and he had been sleeping in the kitchen when she and Conner left for her room. He usually followed her up to bed, but wasn't around. She guessed that he was probably sleeping just outside the bedroom door now, which Conner had locked when he came back from the bathroom. Conner had developed Tessa's habit of locking doors when he was at her house.

Tessa began to push the covers back, but just as she began to sit up Conner turned and wrapped his arm around her, over her breasts and he pulled her back against him. Tessa sighed and didn't fight it. A few more minutes, she told herself, placing her hand over his and closing her eyes again. She felt his warm organ, somewhat hard and resting against her lower back. It wasn't threatening, it was just there, and she liked the feeling of Conner's naked skin against hers. Maybe more than a few minutes, she thought to herself, smiling as she slowly drifted back to sleep.

When Tessa opened her eyes again there were gentle fingers running through her hair, Conner's arm was around her and she was cuddled up to his chest again. She felt him kiss the top of her head and she smiled to herself before she glanced up and found his eyes were on her again. It was really nice to wake up to. She wondered if he watched her sleep, like she watched him.

"Good morning." He said.

"Morning." She yawned as she rolled towards him and stretched, kissing his shoulder, the closest part of him to her lips at the moment.

Conner smiled at her for a moment, and then raised an eyebrow.

"You snore." He accused.

Tessa's eyes widened for a moment as she stared at him, watching as he tried to fight a smile.

"I do not!"

Conner laughed and pulled her closer.

"You do." he argued, "Little squeaky snores. But I love you anyways."

Tessa fell silent for a moment and then looked up at him.

"I do too." she said softly. "Love you...you believe me, don't you?"

Conner was somewhat taken aback by the question. He wasn't sure where it came from. He also didn't know how to respond to it. He turned slightly so he was facing her a little better and stared into her blue eyes for a moment, trying to figure out what she was thinking.

"I believe you." he finally answered, not really finding any underlying questions to respond to. "Why would you ask me that?"

"It's what you said before." Tessa explained, "When I first told you. You said that you didn't expect me to say it. I guess I was wondering why. I thought maybe, I don't give you enough."

"Tessa, no." he frowned, running his fingers through her hair. "That's not it. Just being with you enough. You give me plenty, believe me. You have no idea how great it is to know you're there when I need to talk. I mean, I have friends, but with you, I guess no matter what, I know you always care. You do make me feel loved Tessa." he smiled and then kissed her mouth. "When I said I didn't think you'd say it, it had nothing to do with how I thought you felt about me. It was because I didn't know if you were ready for it. It is a little soon, I mean, sometimes it scares me, how much I care about you, how fast it's happening. I don't think I've ever felt like this before."

Tessa was silent for another minute and Conner waited, giving her time to do whatever thinking she needed to do.

"Me too." she finally said, "About being scared. But maybe not for the same reasons. Maybe you're right. Maybe if you had said it first I wouldn't be able too...but I did mean it. I still do. It's confusing though."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"David." She sighed, pausing for a reaction from Conner, but none came. He was just listening patiently. "I thought I loved David."

"You did."

"I know, but it was a different kind of love. What I feel for you seems, deeper. But it's hard, because when I think about David now I feel..."

"Guilty?"

"Guilty." Tessa nodded. "It was like I was betraying him by loving you. But then, at the same time, I feel like I'm betraying you, because I still love him."

"Tessa, you don't have to feel guilty. I mean, I know that I can't compete with him, and I'll never even try to. He'll always have a place in your heart, one that I can never fill. I don't want that place, Tessa. The place I have with you, in your heart, it's all I'll ever want."

Tessa was silent again. And then she buried her face against his chest and held onto him for a minute while he held her back.

"It's a big place, Conner." She whispered.

Conner let out a breath and closed his eyes again. He doubted that Tessa had close to any idea how much that meant to him. He had wanted more, but at the moment, what she was giving him seemed like enough for now. She loved him.

"Tessa." he said after a few minutes, "There's something I need to tell you."

Tessa moved back again and so did Conner. He wanted to see her face when he said what he needed to. He was nervous and she immediately picked up on it.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing." Conner insisted, "At least, I hope there isn't something wrong. But I do need to tell you something and I'm not exactly sure how you're going to react. If you're angry, I wont blame you."

"Just tell me Conner." She said more forcefully than she meant to.

"It's actually about David." He sighed, "A while back, Misty came to see me. She wanted to talk about her brother." He paused, waiting for Tessa to say something, but she only nodded, so he continued. "He kept this book, filled with stuff about you and...I sort of have it."

Still, nothing from Tessa. He hated when her face went blank like that. She was so hard to read sometimes.

"Maybe I shouldn't have let her give it to me." Conner continued, "But I was curious. You never want to talk about your past Tessa. It's mostly just pictures, some letters too. I didn't read them though. But the pictures, I look at them a lot. You're beautiful in them...say something."

"I know."

"What?"

"I know you have the book." Tessa explained with a small shrug. "Katrina mentioned that Misty gave it to you a few weeks ago. They've been in touch with each other, you know?"

Conner shook his head.

"You're not angry?"

"Well, at first I was." Tessa admitted, "Not at you. I mean, I can't blame you for being curious. You said you didn't read the letters. I appreciate that, by the way. The rest, well I guess it would be the same as seeing my high school yearbook. But I was pretty annoyed with Misty. See, she tried to give me the book just after I found out about David. But I didn't want it. It just hurt too much. I told her to hang onto it. Maybe if I had known that she was going to pass it over to my boyfriend I would have acted a little differently."