"Like It?" "I've Seen Bigger."

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Web Chats should be wittier.
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leBonhomme
leBonhomme
688 Followers

Omegle, Chatroulette, Franceroulette, a Russian chat site, and no doubt others, have uncovered -literally - many persons' willingness to expose themselves and have cyber sex. Sometimes the chats are interesting; most of the time, they follow a fairly boring standard pattern.
The following is an attempt to suggest that chats could be wittier. When lines begin with a hyphen, the same partner is adding another line, sometimes in response to something seen after the previous line.

Hi
Hi
Like it?
I've seen bigger ones
Wanna chat?
If you put it a way and keep your hands on the keyboard
OK
at least you're real
gi me a hi 5
tx w 10 fngrs: thanks
Wow, a six-letter word
haha. In real life I write for fun.
What, where?
er, uh, erotica
could of thought that
and you?
That can't be 'real life'.
Porn acting
Not with that; and wouldn't be here if you did.
- And I don't think those guys can read or write.
OK, but it looks like you could.
Read and write, yes. Not the other.
Meant it as a compliment
Wishful thinking
So what do you do?
Student, English major, junior
Ha, why you want ten finger chatting
And to keep your hands off it
But ur - you're here.
True ;)
Like the way you wink
- nice eyes
Probably tell them all that
- if it's all you can see
maybe, if it's all I can see
- pretty lips, too
Flattery, and I can see where you're looking now.
below the screen
Want me to sit up straight?
Please
Since you're so polite
Nice, thanks. Nice boo blouse.
Hm! You could have corrected that first.
didn't want to, trying to be a little subtle
That must be a first here.
for me, I'll admit.
I shouldn't ask, but do girls really like to
- see guys like that when they click on?
You don't, apparently, but you're still here.
Other girls, women, men?
Some look and hit the disconnect
But some don't?
You didn't.
Because it wasn't the only thing on screen
- face, shaved …
my good luck.
Um-hmm
nice smile no flattery
yours too, not like some
like how?
smirking, lecherous
want me to try?
No, well, not yet
that wasn't a smirk, was it?
Probably more a wry smile
For what you wrote?
Maybe
That was.
Just a little one
like this
Oooh! That looked a little more like lecherous.
Maybe D
looked like you typed that with one hand.
Just checking if it's still there.
Hmm! Bet it is.
It is. But not like before
that's better, starting on level ground
- not just being an object for some horny …
You're right - both hands again. Sorry
Have you watched chats elsewhere?
Have you?
Hm! Guess I asked for that. A couple.
More than a couple, watching the girls
of course, me too
the girls?
Just to see what they do. I'm not bi
- I don't think.
They just do what I like to do.
Oooh! Nice tongue!
Close your mouth, or I'll think something.
Snap! D maybe /
Funny!
Watching chats without the text, I wish guys
- would read aloud what they both are texting.
Oh, good suggestion. Yeah, that would be
- much more interesting.
Who can we tell?
Hmm? You've watched more than a couple.
Um-hmm
That was a smirk
Um-hmm. How's it doing?
;) needs encouragement
me too ;) with ten fingers
like asking or telling?
Enticing ?
This is going to be new, but I like it, you too.
That was a start. Eyes, lips, …
I'd love to see more hm? just a button or two
You like buttons?
Haha! Not like that, and definitely not still in the button hole.
;) I didn't think so.
That's better. Actually, buttons always seem to be in the way.
Sometimes I think so too. :)
Oooh! Three out of the way.
- Mmmm doesn't look you're wearing a bra.
Hm-umm!
You could have just shook head with that smirk.
Had to type to keep from unbuttoning the next one.
Who's being enticing?
Do you have hair on your chest?
Some girls don't like that.
So you do?
But just enough to rub your fingers in.
That would be nice, manly.
There!
I like that, wish I could. Want another button?
Slowly, I was planning to have to talk you out of your bra.
Sweet! This is more fun than I hoped.
For me too.
- Oh gosh! You could have done that more slowly.
I didn't want to.
You don't need to wear a bra. Lovely! Luscious!
I like them too. Afraid they would be small like my older sister's
They aren't! But you could model bras.
I'd rather go without. D
Don't do that! Unless you want to see it again.
- Perfect nipples, especially like that.
But it feels so good. I wouldn't mind now.
That's good. I wish I could do that, with my mouth.
I wish you could, with that tongue of yours.
- Oooh! Like that! And sucking!
Slurp slurp!
You do write erotica!
- And with your tongue doing that.
Somewhere else!
Mmmm! Where?!
Do I need to tell you?
NO want to see?
It does!
Hm-hmm! The first one with eyes
- wait
Pant pant ….
- pant Pretty panties
hm-hmm! panties two or more diminutive pants?
witty I think it was just one bigger pant
- Oh gosh, lovely ass! pant PANT
- kneeling, your not going to let it see
;) not yet. It has to be above the table.
Tease! Wait.
Oooh! I take it back, It's the biggest one I've seen
- ;) ... today, this week look!
!!! What a lovely pussy!! It doesn't want to just look.
I don't either. Want to help each other?
if u dnt mnd 5 f txt
luv it
ooo so pink
n wet
slurp yum
ur cck too
mmmm
mmmm
- whats the hurry, got to go somewhere?
Go? come, here D
me too, but not so fast.
You never will if we keep typing
I know, n I probably need more help than u
anyway I can
talk to me
sexy
even dirty
- but not smutty
- and no unnice words describing women
- just parts of them D
thats whats wrong with chatting, have to talk too much
haha, and that with our hands.
We're going to have to start over, look
Aww, looks disappointed.
- And when it gets good, I need both hands.
- Oh! It's like some of those in the videos
Never seen a live one?
Not yet ,) yours doesn't count as live
- looks like more fun to play with
Mmmm! Yes. at least i think so
Yeah, so show me.
- Are we just going to chat all night?
Not if you need both hands to play.
- Idea! If I ask yes/no questions, you can thumb-up
- for yes, or hide it for no
Hmm! I'll always have thumb free.
Yeah, like that
start
do you like to play with your pussy
- two thumbs!
ur not doing anything
too busy thinking of questions
- and it will enjoy the answers
doesnt look like it yet
stop typing and play
- up do you just rub it
- down but still could cum just rubbing?
- down up whats that mean? type
sometimes. Before I did more, I thought that was
- good enough
but then you learned
- up like to rub your nipples
- up up I see, perfect boobs, now that I may say so
- like me to suck them as much as I want to
- up slurp can you
- down save that for guys or girls?
- up just one, no two?
girls
I like that :) and that was all they did
- down, but reluctant to admit it
- up I like that too. Why not? Good?
- up you too
- up with a grin. Most be good, knowing
- how it feels
- oooh, lots of ups! Better than I could?
- down, but wavering. being polite?
- up I agree, no reason I could do it better
- up feeling good?
- up but not as good as having it licked
- down so when did you start doing more
- age? 15 16 17 first second or third?
- frown shouldn't have asked
- up sorry but then you were 18
- up grin another grin
- up must have been fun then
- up down but not as good as ...
- up he wasn't good
- wiped aside not him
- up not yet with a friend
- up so? Oh a girlfriend. oh right
- the two mentioned above
- up of course boys are such a problem
- up and down just sometimes
- up That's what a good girlfriend is for
- up better than by yourself
- up a girlfriend who knew more?
- up :) I like that two fingers two?
- up oooh All three of you together
- down Hmmm two fingers in your pussy
- 1 and then 2 ?
- up grin wish I could
- up and in hers theirs
- up up and you found it g-spot
- up 3 times oh that's good congrats
- up lucky If this were twenty questions, I'd be doing great
- up better than the first cock
- up sorry bout that same here, mine
- cock after the girls
- up disappointing, knowing already that it
- could be better
- up with a scowl
- up hope it was then, since then
- up down up down sometimes
- up I don't think you're trying as hard as you can
- down waiting to see my little cock again
not little, yes. Ask what I'd like to do with it.
Just hold and rub it, learn that it's more fun
- than with the other kind
- down but like i'm going to have to do
- up scowl
- would you rather suck it or fuck it? first, second?
- up up, both?
- up D D looks like you'd have to start just sucking
- up are you good, like it all the way?
- Double up! DD we could do that too
- UP! big up but then we might not fuck
- down but if it still could girls always can
- up up show me where
- Oooh! in there!
- funny how the sight of pussy makes him
- want to come to attention
- up if only I could get my tongue or cock in there
- up up either?
- up both? One after the other, of course
- up mmmmm can you make it move
- MMMM oooh No need to raise a thumb
- again, and again! Oooh, that would feel good.
- up, that wasn't a question, ur agreeing
- up. Good thing U n P are where they are.
Fuck me!
- As good as I can, with your help g-spot
- up
like this wishing it was your cock
mmmm 2 fngrs
mmmm

[two minutes later]

Shit! Sorry I wish that had all been in my pussy!
Not more than I do! All over
Um-hmm! Or in my mouth
And then your pussy drooling in mine
Almost as good. Pity I can't taste it, all over your chest, sticking in the hair
Um-hmm! Cause we spent so long chatting
Um-hmm. Thank you.
Thank yourself; it was your idea.
But you might not have gone along with it.
But I learned something.
What?
How wildly - aggressively? - girls - you at least
- arouse their pussies.
Maybe shouldn't have shown you.
Why? Doesn't your friend?
What friend? Else I wouldn't be here.
Or me. Where is “here”?
Could be anywhere: College Road
Of course, English major.
Um-hmm.
Oh! Does it go off University Place?
Oh! Yes it does.
And Dickinson is the next street?
Shit! Sorry again. How did you guess?
I'm a grad student.
Here! At ... in ... two word state name
I think we're talking about the same place.
- university town
We must be. Is this embarrassing?
A little, for me too, but it doesn't have to be.
What if we see each other on the street?
- Maybe I shouldn't have seen your face.
But I wouldn't mind seeing yours again.
But thinking about everything else you saw.
Oh, it would be embarrassing, not seeing you,
- how this all started.
Hm-hmm! With you like that.
Yes. If you can't see it, I'm blushing.
You can? You weren't then.
Why I am now.
I should be, too.
But you're not.
Maybe if I hold my breath.
Don't bother. … Unless you're waiting for me
- to suggest a date.
- You are, at least, I want to think that you are.
I am! Haha Still holding it.
Hmm! Did I tell you that you have lovely breasts,
- especially when your nipples are like that?
Oh shit! Sorry again. Forgot that we're naked.
Me too, until they popped out. I'll try to forget them.
Have to wear a bra.
If you want to, or a jacket or something.
Don't get the wrong idea; I never go to bed on a first date.
Maybe we could call it the second one.
Shit! They're still sticking out.
Yes. Tomorrow? Today, it's past midnight, at the corner
- of College and University? Dinner, seven o'clock?
OK. I guess I broke my rule about first dates.
We can still treat it as a first date.
Hmm! Try to, after seeing all those white blobs on your chest!
- Tomorrow.
Today.
Today, sleep tight.
You too.

leBonhomme
leBonhomme
688 Followers
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AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

how weird

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