Living a Lie

'I'm sorry Sue but I'm absolutely bushed. How about we call it a night, get some sleep and tackle this dilemma tomorrow – together as a team?'

They headed upstairs and Karen took Sue into the bedroom they had shared, made sure she had everything she needed and then left, much to Sue's dismay.

'I'm sorry Babe, I can't sleep with you tonight. First off – neither of us would get any sleep because after 3 months I know I'm not going to be able to keep my hands to myself. In addition to that, if we sleep together tonight and you leave me again tomorrow I don't think I would be able to cope with the heartbreak.

I'm just next door and I'll see you in the morning. Please, please don't leave before I get up.'

'I won't Honey, I promise, now kiss me goodnight.'

Karen woke in the morning to a strange sound invading her dreams, finally realised it was the phone and reached over to grab it, only to then remember that she was in the spare room and the phone was in the master bedroom.

She stumbled out of bed and hurried to the phone hoping to get to it before it woke Sue but on entering the bedroom she saw her sitting up in bed staring at the phone as if it had just bitten her.

'What's up Babe, are you ok?'

'That's my parents number, I didn't know if I should answer it or not.'

'What reason did you give them for moving out?'

Sue looked embarrassed before finally saying 'I'm sorry, I know it wasn't true but I just said we weren't getting on very well'

Glancing at the clock and noticing that it was only just after 8am on a Sunday morning, Karen grabbed the phone and hit speaker phone, assuming there must be a good reason for the call.

Sue's mum sounded relieved, and immediately broke into an apology for phoning so early and explained that Sharon had woken up and called her when she realised the car was still gone and was worried Sue had been in an accident.

'No, she's here and she's fine. She came over last night and we had a chat and a few drinks so I persuaded her to stay rather than drive back, hang on – I'll pass the phone over.'

Sue took the phone reluctantly but was relieved to know that it was her mum rather than her dad, she apologised for worrying her and promised to phone Sharon straight away to ease her fears and was just about to hang up when her mum stopped her, saying she wanted to talk to her.

'Sue, I don't know what's going on, and you don't have to tell me if you don't want to but you've been as miserable as sin the last few months. I know you're worried about me and your father, but that's my problem to deal with, not yours. I'm still your mother; I love you and I'll always be here for you no matter what. If you're in some kind of trouble you can talk to me about it in confidence you know, your father doesn't have to know.'

Sue was silent for a few moments as she weighed up her choices, scared at coming clean and yet not wanting to pass up the opportunity to grab the olive branch her mum was offering.

'Mum, I do need to talk to you. You're right, I'd rather talk to you alone and don't worry – I'm not in any trouble. Is dad in later?'

'He'll be out of the house by ten this morning at one of his bloody religious debate groups and I don't expect him back before about 1pm'

'OK, I'll see you about 10.30, bye.'

Sue looked like a startled rabbit as she hung up the phone, realisation of what she was about to do caught up with her and she started to tremble.

Karen slipped under the covers with her and held her in a close embrace, not sure if Sue was up to the task but knowing it had to be her decision. She would never force Sue to come out; she had to do it for her own reasons or else there would be resentment and recriminations later.

'You ok Honey?'

'No, I'm fucking shitting myself!' but as Karen looked at Sue's face she could see the start of a nervous smile play across her lips as she started to believe she could overcome her fear and take the leap.

'Make love to me?' her eye's pleading

Karen kissed Sue deeply but then pulled away, the effort of tearing herself out of the bed almost too much for her heart to bear.

'Yes Honey, I'll make love to you for the rest of our lives, but not now. If you really are going to do this then I don't want your courage to come from sex, it has to be because of something deeper.

I love you Sue, more than I can put into words. I'll help and support you in any way that I can, I'll even go back to living a lie with you if that's what you want – or, painful as it would be I'll let you go if that's what you think is best, but you need to REALLY know what you want from me, what you want from US before anything else.'

Sue stared at Karen with the utmost love in her eyes, tears starting to trickle down her cheeks.

'I love you too Kaz, and I understand what you're saying but I can't go back to living a lie and I won't let you go either. I'm going to tell mum and take it from there – will you come with me?'

An hour later they had returned the car that Sue had borrowed and presented flowers to Sharon by way of an apology for worrying her.

'So, are you two back together again?' The look on Sue's face was a picture, making Sharon double up laughing. 'Oh come on Sue, I've known you since college you can't hide this from me! You've been staying here with us for almost 2 months and you've done nothing but talk about someone called Karen, who I'm assuming is the good looking woman standing next to you with the protective look in her eye!'

'Why didn't you say anything if you knew?' stammered Sue in utter disbelief.

'Wasn't my place girl, I assumed you'd tell me when you were ready. So, are things back to normal now?'

'No, not yet.' and Sue looked lovingly at Karen 'There's someone else I need to tell first, once that's done I'll be free of my demons and we can be a proper couple for the first time.' and with that she slipped her arm around Karen's waist in a very obvious public display of affection and kissed her cheek tenderly.

Sue was adamant that she was going through with her decision, so they loaded her things into the back of Karen's car and headed to Sue's mum's house. Sue was a wreck during the short journey and Karen wasn't much better. She had only met Sue's parents once and it had been very brief, so she had no idea of how this visit was going to turn out.

On arrival, they were surprised when Sue's mum came hurrying out of the front door and jumped into the back of the car.

'Your father has a cold and doesn't want to give it to the Rabbi so he's decided not to go, so I've told him you're taking me to a garden centre, he hates gardening but don't hang around in case he changes his mind and decides he wants to come with us!'

With that Karen hit the accelerator and drove them to the nearest garden centre which happily had a very nice coffee shop. On arrival Sue obviously felt very nervous about the upcoming situation but once they were seated with coffee and cake, her mum made things much easier.

'Ok Sue, you're obviously in a state about something so lets get it out in the open so we can deal with it. There are things I'm not going to be happy about but as long as you haven't murdered someone I'll deal with it. You don't stop being a mother just because your kids grow up and I'll always be here for you.'

'Mum, there's no easy way to say this so here goes' One very deep breath later 'I've fallen very much in love with someone and I intend to spend the rest of my life with them; I'm not sure what you'll think but I know for certain dad is never going to approve. I've been lying to you by omission because I didn't know if it was better to lie and keep the peace or be open and risk hurting you, but I can't live a lie any longer.'

'Oh Sue! Is that all? I've been imagining all sorts of things from serious crime to fatal diseases! So can I guess that as you had a recent falling out with Karen, who is now sat next to you looking worried, that she's the interested party in this conversation?'

'Yes! Oh mum, I love her so much, I didn't know how to tell you! Dad's going to have a heart attack when I tell him!'

'You leave that old hypocrite to me love. He may have suddenly found religion again but he hasn't always been holier than Moses. I don't suppose he's ever told you that his brother Jake was ostracised from the family for being gay? It's one of the reasons he walked away from Judaism in the first place.

For now, you two just get yourselves back on track and let me think about how best to tackle your dad.'

Sue and Karen engulfed her in a huge hug, both crying and thanking her for being so understanding.

'I can't say I'm not a bit sad. No parent wants to see their child embark on a direction where they are putting themselves in the firing line for prejudice and bigotry – there's enough of that in the world without going out looking for it, and I'd have loved to see you married with kids, but you wouldn't have told me about this if it wasn't important to you and if Karen makes you happy then that's all that really matters.'

They left the garden centre having made a couple of random purchases to validate their visit to Sue's dad, dropped her mum off and drove home in near silence, the implications of what had just occurred occupying their minds.

Karen was hoping that Sue would now commit fully to her and was formulating a plan to seal the deal, while Sue was hoping that Karen would put their brief split behind them and that they could now go back to being a couple. She was also worried about what would transpire once her dad was informed, but she trusted her mum to handle it well.

As the pulled up outside Karen's cottage; their cottage, Karen turned to Sue and asked 'Home sweet home?' and looked at her hopefully. Sue took Karen's hand and looked deeply into her eyes as she responded 'Yes please – if you'll have me back?'

The look that passed between them spoke volumes and they jumped out of the car, grabbed Sue's stuff from the boot and headed inside.

Once the front door was firmly closed behind them Sue turned to face Karen, placed her hands on her cheeks and placed her lips gently on hers. The kiss was brief but Karen could see the fire burning in Sue's eyes as she pulled away to stop Karen deepening it.

'I really do love you Karen and I'm so, so sorry that I put you through the last 3 months, but it was a good thing in some ways. It made me focus on what's important to me and it turns out that absolutely nothing is as important to me as you.

Other than waiting for my mum to tell my dad I won't hide any more and I won't lie. I fully intend to tell everyone at work tomorrow and I'll stick a message on facebook for my old friends to find and they can all either accept me or stay out of my way.' and with that she kissed away Karen's tears of love and joy, got down on her knees and pleaded 'now can we make love – pleeeease?'

Karen wasn't about to turn Sue down for a third time, especially after all she'd been through to ensure their happiness as a couple and she wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her tightly into her body, remembering the way they seemed to fit so well together. The kiss started as something gentle and loving but it soon escalated into a duel of passions, their tongues battling for supremacy as the months of pent up frustration came boiling to the surface.

Karen was walking backwards towards the stairs, taking Sue with her as they kissed, their moans audible over the slurping and sucking of their mouths.

As Karen's foot hit the bottom stair Sue kept pushing until her lover was sat on the stairs with Sue kneeling between her legs, her hands tangled in Karen's hair and still they kissed as passionately as first time lovers but with all of the knowledge of their previous 2 years.

Finally Sue broke the kiss and pulled her tee shirt over her head, quickly followed by her bra. Karen followed suit and as she was undoing her bra she could feel Sue's hands deftly undoing the fly of her jeans and lifted her hips to allow them to be pulled off her legs.

In seconds they were both naked and as Sue resumed her position between Karen's thighs and they held each other close the moan of desire that escaped Karen's throat as their skin touched for the first time in too long was closer to an animalist growl, sending shivers of delight down Sue's spine.

Karen's hands were cupping Sue's arse cheeks and as she assaulted Karen's neck and earlobes with her mouth, sucking and nibbling and biting gently, she could feel her fingers kneading the flesh and her desire became too much for her.

Pushing her lover down until she was laying back against the stairs she lowered her head to lick along Karen's chin, down across her throat, gently sucking on the pulse that was rampant in her veins, down to her chest and all around the nipples that stood proud and wanting.

She cupped both breasts in her hands and took the first nipple into her mouth, sucking gently before biting down and flicking her tongue remorselessly over the rigid nub before repeating her actions on the other nipple as one hand trailed down Karen's stomach, making patterns on the smooth skin.

Karen had always had sensitive nipples and was desperately trying to hold back an orgasm. She could feel the wetness leak from her lips and run down the crack in her arse and desperately wanted to get her hands on Sue but she wasn't allowed, being pushed back every time she tried to sit up a little.

'Don't stop yourself coming Honey, it'll only be the first of many.' grinned Sue, knowing exactly what effect she was having on her partner, and as she sucked hard on a nipple again while gently tapping Karen's clit she felt her hips rise and her legs stiffen as Karen released a wail to accompany her orgasm.

Sue had no intentions of stopping. She had been dreaming of this moment for too long, was afraid she had given up the right to touch this gorgeous woman and she was going to make the most of it; was going to show her lover just how sorry she was for putting them through agony, and just as Karen's breathing started to slow she thrust 2 fingers into her dripping pussy and lowered her head to lick and suck at her clit.

Karen was propelled straight back into a cloud of ecstasy and when Sue curled her fingers to rub them across her G spot on every thrust while sucking hard on her clit she screamed Sue's name over and over again as the waves just kept breaking over her, finally leaving her limp and drained.

Sue kissed her back to earth, sharing the taste of her sex as she languidly plied her tongue across Karen's lips and as soon as she was able Karen hauled Sue up her body until she was knelt on the stair level with Karen's head, one knee either side.

The sight was awesome as Karen looked up and was able to see her beautiful sex, her gorgeous tits and on top – the face that she had fallen in love with so long ago.

Grabbing Sue's arse she pulled her hips to her face and speared her pussy with her rigid tongue, fucking it swiftly and licking as far inside as she could reach.

Sue was moaning and panting loudly, her excitement covering Karen's face and when she moved her tongue to her clit and slid one, then 2, then 3 fingers up into her hot wet pussy Sue was thrusting back so hard Karen had trouble keeping hold of her.

'Oh Karen, don't ever, ever stop!' and she toppled forward, her elbows resting on the stair above as her orgasm ripped through her.

Karen wasn't about to waste the position she now found herself in and with Sue now supporting herself on the stairs she took her other hand and coated it in Sue's copious nectar before sliding a long, slim finger into Sue's rosebud, her other hand and mouth still mastering her clit and pussy.

'Holy fucking shit. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Yes, fucking yes!' As Sue's body stiffened and jerked in uncontrollable spasms, the sight alone tipping Karen over the edge as well.

They lay on the stairs for a while, tangled in each other's arms and legs and basking in the after glow as they regained their breath. Karen felt Sue shiver and once she had stood on shaky legs she helped Sue to her feet and tugged her gently up the stairs where they crawled under the warm duvet and snuggled back into each other's arms, quickly falling into a contented slumber safe in their embrace.