Longing... Ch. 02

Kodan tried to keep some form of composure as she watched Alexander's pretty grey eyes darken immensely. She could feel her juices starting to flow slowly out of her. This wasn't the shy, unsure Xan that piqued her interest and made her moist with his nervousness... no, no. This man was entirely different. There was something new, something invigorating. She was looking at a man who had a fire in his eyes.

'No, not a fire,' she thought to herself. It was more of a glow; a soft confidence.

But damned if she didn't want to know what fire would look like coming from those beautiful, mesmerizing grey eyes... the thought nearly sent her over the edge.

Nearly.

Kodan stared at her, um... what the hell was he to her? He couldn't be considered a boyfriend. Only boys were boyfriends, in her opinion. What she was looking at was definitely all man.

Her man.

'Damn,' Kodan thought, admonishing herself for putting a label on their relationship. What was she going on about, referring to Alexander as her 'man'? She had only said yes less than two minutes ago. Why was she claiming him like that?

'Because you've known him for two years,' her mind was practically screaming at her. 'And you've spent more time getting to know him than most married couples do, dumbass!'

Kodan knew her mind was speaking the truth.

Kodan hadn't even touched another man in the two years she had known Alexander. Considering the fact that she was the female version of a 'playa', this was a feat for her. No one ever called her a slut; she was very selective in whom she entertained in private. Besides, they all had dubbed her 'one of the guys'. To them, she was just playing the field like they were. But, after Alexander showed up, she felt no attraction to anyone else. She subconsciously remained celibate, hoping and praying that he would give her what she needed.

At first, she thought he wasn't attracted to her.

"Is he gay?" She asked Jacob.

"What? No, he's not gay," Jacob retorted, annoyed at how oblivious his two friends were to each other's attraction. "He's usually not a pussy when it comes to women."

"Then why is he so apprehensive with me?"

"Cos you act like a man."

Kodan punched him in his side. "I do not act like a man!"

"Dude, you just punched me in the fucking ribcage!" Jacob groaned. "Be a girl, sometimes! See, that's why he won't ask you out! He's afraid you'll drop kick his ass!"

Jacob saw the tears forming in his best friend's eyes.

"Am I really that scary?" Her voice cracked, giving way to a Kodan she hadn't let out in years.

Jacob immediately scooped her small frame into his arms. In any other instance, he would've said that she was indeed scary, just to see her go ballistic. He knew, though, that she'd break down even more at this point if he had. Jacob then realized that his best friend, for the first time since he'd known her, truly cared about someone on a romantic level. He'd seen her run through men and women like Jeremy Wariner running 400 metres at the Olympics, and she'd never blinked twice as to whose hearts she stomped on. For the first time, he'd watched her as she made herself completely vulnerable, just to get to know Alexander.

For the first time, he saw the potential of love in Kodan.

He damn sure wasn't gonna tell Kodan what he saw, though. He knew at that moment that he would let Kodan find her love for Alexander in her own time.

For now, he wouldn't just console her.

Alexander could feel every muscle in his body ache for blood flow. His manhood was quickly draining all the blood from his body.

'She said yes,' his conscience repeated over and over again. He was still on Cloud Nine... he couldn't believe that she had wanted him all along!

He heard her call his name, but he couldn't quite register the words that were flowing through those beautiful, full lips of hers. He had plans to taste those lips as often as he could.

"Xan!"

"Huh?" Alexander slightly jumped, realizing that he had been staring at Kodan for the entirety of her one-sided conversation to him.

"I was just saying that we could do something tonight, since it's Friday and all..." Kodan repeated what she had told him earlier.

"Oh, of course," Alexander replied, still slightly dazed. He felt dizzy.

"Are you okay, Xan?" Kodan walked over to him; she put her right hand to his forehead, and her left hand on his upper back. She shivered, realizing that she was so close to him, touching him intimately. She had never shown anyone the slightest affection before.

Alexander froze, feeling Kodan's soft, warm hand against his flesh. His head swam from her scent. It was the Bvlgari Eau de Parfum II, far more feminine than the Bvlgari Man he wore. His practical mind was amused that they both enjoyed the same fragrance maker. His body, however, didn't give a shit. He just wanted to touch her... before he knew it, he had grabbed her hand to smell her wrist.

"Mmm," he groaned softly, enchanted by how intoxicating she smelled.

Kodan wanted to snatch her arm away, but fought against it. She wasn't used to men showing affection in this way; she certainly wasn't used to being aroused from someone sniffing her skin. But to Kodan, he wasn't just someone. She felt her will breaking. She wanted this man to take her completely. She wanted to submit to his will in every possible way. And it scared her to want to be so submissive. She wanted to please him.

Alexander let go of Kodan's hand, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. 'Did I really just sniff her?!" he thought. He dropped his head into his palms, trying to gain some sort of composure. He just knew that once he looked up, she would've already been gone, and he would've lost her before he even got the chance to claim her, all because he had to be a creeper.

But she didn't leave.

"What's wrong?" Kodan kneeled down, so that when her Xan decided to look back up, he'd have to look into her eyes. She knew that when he looked straight into her eyes, he was incapable of telling her a lie.

Alexander felt her in front of him, her hands on his knees. His cock throbbed against his zipper, wanting to feel those soft, toffee-colored hands wrapped around its thick base. He couldn't look into her eyes. He was so ashamed that her body writhing in ecstasy underneath his own was the only thing going through his mind. He couldn't let her know that he wanted to spread her legs wide open and thrust his aching cock deep within her sex right there in the library. How was he ever supposed to prove his undying loyalty to her, if all he could think about was ripping every stitch of clothing off her heavenly body? How could he stare into those doe eyes of hers, knowing that she was the object of his most carnal desires? He wouldn't dare make her uncomfortable by looking at her. In his mind, just because she had agreed to be with him, it didn't mean that she was ready to give herself to him.

"Alexander Caeden Rydderch, if you don't look at me right now, I will punch you in the gut." Kodan sternly warned him, knowing that he knew she was good for her word.

"I can't," Alexander sighed, preparing to feel her small, powerful fist connect to his abdomen. Instead, he felt those soft hands embrace his own.

"How can I help you if you won't tell me what's wrong, Xan?"

Silence.

"Xan, say something, baby."

More silence.

"Xan!"

"All I can think about is having sex with you!" Alexander blurted out, no longer feeling the confidence he had ten minutes ago. He reverted back to his shy, unsure self. "I want a meaningful relationship with you, I do! But, ever since you said yes, my mind has been playing a fast forward of every position I've imagined pounding into you. I don't want our first day as a couple ruined because I couldn't keep my hormones in check."

"Number one, I wouldn't have said yes if I didn't think you wanted a relationship. Number two, I'm most likely hornier than you, so I doubt I'll be offended if you went to town on it right now."

"But, I don't want it to happen that way. You mean so much more to me than a quick fuck in a library, Kodan," Alexander answered back, catching Kodan off guard. "We just started dating ten minutes ago. I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of you, baby. I'm not doing this just because I want to sleep with you; I'm in this to be the best man I can be to you, and make you happy."

"You're an idiot."

"What?" Alexander shot his head up, staring Kodan straight in her face.

"If you think for a second that the two years we've spent together is not considered dating, then the Welsh are dumber than I thought," Kodan smiled, and kissed his nose. "You have sat here with me almost every day, Xan. I cannot remember the last time I spent a Friday or a Saturday away from your cute ass. We've spent the night over at each other's apartments! You've seen me naked, for Christ's sake! On more than one occasion, mind you.

"If you really believe that I have let you into my life, only as a friend, then I'd hate to know what I had to do to get you to think that we were more than friends." Kodan laughed, wondering to herself how that scenario would've played out. She watched his gorgeous eyes light up again, as he took in the simple words she relayed to him. She leaned in, so close to him that their lips dared to brush. "Think you can keep control if I kiss you?"

Alexander didn't reply; he only closed the millimeter gap between him and his woman. Kodan moaned softly into his mouth, amazed at how soft his lips were. Alexander's head swam for the umpteenth time that day; he couldn't fathom how perfect his lips felt against hers.

Kodan guided Alexander's bottom lip into her own mouth, tasting a hint of mint. She slowly dipped her tongue into his mouth, wanting to taste more of him. Their tongues slowly danced, introducing themselves to one another for the first time. Sweet and sensual became deep and passionate, as the two soon-to-be lovers engaged in their first kiss.

Alexander pulled away, gasping for air.

"Jesus..." he whispered breathlessly as he tried to see through foggy eyes. Never in his life had he experienced such intensity! Kodan tried to catch her breath, wondering how she almost had an orgasm from a simple kiss. She desperately wanted to see if she could coast over the edge with another kiss, but she knew that the library was no place to scream her release.

"Fuck the movie; wanna go back to my apartment?"

"Hell yeah." Alexander almost growled, inciting a giggle from Kodan. Her giggle sent chills through his tense body. His member swelled even more. It didn't matter how much self-control he aimed to have; his appendage would betray him every chance it got.

They walked—onlookers would say that they sprinted—to Kodan's Subaru Impreza WRX STI. Alexander admired how she wasn't into "chick" cars. He thought it was incredibly cute that she was an avid rallycar race fan, and that she claimed to be forever Ken Block's biggest fan, 'even if he was driving fucking Fords now,' as she would always tell him.

Minutes later, they arrived at the complex.

Seconds later, both of them were running to the stairs, scaling them two and three at a time. Kodan swiftly jammed the key into her door lock, turned the key to the right, yanked it out, and pushed the door open. She was not prepared for what happened next.

"Hello, piccina."

"Fuck me," Kodan sighed as she stood in the doorway, not knowing how to react.

"Is that any way to greet your father?"