Making A Devil Out Of Me

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cowboy109
cowboy109
313 Followers

"You really need to care for somebody. Psychologically, you are incomplete like a fish out of water, when you don't have someone to take care of. You need to be needed. That's what your girlfriend isn't giving you. You need that emotional closeness of being in somebody's broken space."

Her words touched my inside with her tenderness. Out of some illogical reaction, I started kissing her on the neck. I placed lots of tender full lipped kisses on her neck. It made no sense. She started kissing me back on my neck. My memory took me back to my first girlfriend and how we were fooling around in her room. The same feelings like in that place came back to me. Cat's boobs and belly were pressed against me. Her body raked and pushed against mine.

I long ago had gotten one of my instant reactions. Cat tilted her pelvis in G-strings against my pant covered erection. It was like reality had shattered. All the rules that held my universe sane and safe were thrown out. What was right in front of me was so tasty and seductive. I freed one boob out the bra and placed it in my mouth. Cat was flush with heat from the wet slobber on her sensitive nipple. She pulled the shirt off my body. I let her pull it.

"I have been so ready for you all this time. I am so slick wet."

"Let me put on a condom."

"I'm allergic to latex."

"Do you have any condoms?"

"No. It's okay. I take the pill and am clean. I got a gyno last week."

Our bodies were stark naked. The incinerating feeling of naked skin touching each other had set me on fire to let out any reason. We were past the point of no return. She put her vagina over my penis. My penis felt her wet pussy like the slickest surface in the world.

"Are you sure that it's okay without a condom?"

"Yes." It was too late anyway.

Feeling her wet pussy for the first time was so delicious. All my life, I had only felt rubber or more accurately nothing. It felt so connected to feel her torrent on the inside. And, Cat kept moaning in my ear over and over "I can feel you." Fucking a hot teenage cheerleader waitress, feeling this hot horny body devouring me, all that was worth the possible price of dying, dying from HIV. To experience this precious gift was worth giving up decades of a long life without it. I felt so close to Cat. I felt so surrendered to her. I felt so broken out of my rules and to experience passion, real life.

My groin was soaked in Cat's wet juices. I erupted an orgasm inside of her. The mental visual of shooting my load directly inside of the depth of her belly aroused me even more. There was the moment of orgasm, when I lose all control. I can't hold back the semen. I can't hold back my private thoughts. I can hold up my physical shield. I just surrendered to Cat. Orgasms override my ability to self-control in my body. My body draped over hers.

"Stay inside me," whispered Cat into my ear.

We drifted into a post-coital snooze. My penis slowly turned flaccid in her cave. It became this small, flaccid thing that could barely plug her and threatened to fall out. About the time that Cat got up to wipe her pussy, where my cum oozed out, and she was licking her hand like delicious ice cream, around that time, the horniness left me with broken guilt behind. I was torn with guilt.

"Where is that recording?"

"It's alright. You don't have to be nice. I knew that the moment you stopped thinking with your pistol, you'd turn back into a jerk. There is no copy. It was just a ruse to get you in here. You can leave now, before you smash anything."

And, that I did. I left.

Candice didn't notice my mood at all. She was too busy clipping coupons out of the paper. Out of nowhere, she quipped, "I think you take me for granted. You don't even notice me. I was so upset today, because someone stole a parking spot at the grocery store right in front of me. And, you don't even notice. I was watching Dr. Phil on afternoon TV today. He talked about men needing to work on their listening skills. And, I totally thought about you. And, I made this list of things." I spare you the long talk of me being delegated to say 'you are so right', 'that is great', and 'that must be so hard for you.'

Dear reader, as you can expect by now, the tale only got more afflicted. A few days later, I came home early. I found Cat posing naked on our central kitchen counter, an imported piece from Italy. She reclined on her elbows. One knee was bent. Her toes were pointed. The afternoon light just hit her right through the window. Her boobs were juicy, awesome, and round. It was surreal, the dream of every bachelor.

"Cat, it was a one-time thing. You have to get out before Candice comes home," I spoke with a sad, bored tone.

"Don't you wanna play?" Cat lifted a pair of metal handcuffs out of her purse. She dangled them from one finger, "You have been a bad boy. I have to arrest you," she said with a stern stripper voice.

"No, I don't want to play." I drew out every syllable to send a clear message.

"Okay, I'll play by myself," said Cat sheepishly. She strutted butt naked into the living room. I followed her.

"Where are your clothes?"

Cat stopped in front of the exposed water pipe in the living room. She faced me. I drew a face to indicate that I was waiting for a response. She was silent. She reached her hands behind her back. I heard the ratchet of the cuffs clicking in place. I heard the second ratchet clicking in place. What a brat she was. How would I get her to stop stalling for time? Then, it hit me. She had handcuffed herself to the water pipe. It was a thick five inch water pipe, the pride of my exposed rustic living room.

Cat opened, "the way I see it, you have two options. You can play find-the-key, which is very well hidden in your apartment. Or, you can fuck the living daylight out of me. And, when I am 110% pleased, I'll tell you were the damn key is. Your little girlie girl is coming home in twenty minutes or so. I'll just hang out here, while you make up your mind."

I looked over her body. Every bit of it was taut. Her pussy was clean shaven with a little landing strip. The labia hang out a little bit like a tongue teasingly poised between the lips. Out of her purse, I could see a toy whip hanging out. It was a leather whip that had so many strands that it didn't seriously hurt. It was only for the erotic mind game of making believe of whipping somebody.

I turned over her purse. The rest of her knickknacks spilled out. None of them was a key. I slipped my hand under the couch upholstery. I opened the fridge. I looked under every coffee cup. Out of an insane impulse, I checked the toilet bowl.

Standing in front of Cat: "Give me a tip at least."

Cat didn't speak. She tried to reach my crotch with her mouth. She was bending and pulling on her hand cuffs with the single mindedness of a zombie trying to eat brain. Seeing her frustration from being unable to reach me, a smile of superiority slipped out from me. Changing her plan, she tried to reach me with her foot. She tenaciously balanced hopping on one foot, while the other struggled to reach my crotch. Her calves swelled up from her pointed toes. And, she managed to press the balls of her feet against my crotch.

Wow, that was the first time that my foot fetish received some kind of expression. She caught my face. "Wow, you are into feet. I'll rub you off with my feet. You know you want it." I did with guilt. I wanted to get a glimpse just for a little touch. I opened my pants. I couldn't believe. She had no judgment or hesitation about rubbing her feet on my flaccid penis. She tried to grab my penis with her curled toes. She tried to perch my penis between her big toes and the next like a cigarette.

"Come on, kiss them."

"Just once, you gotta go right after that."

I kissed her feet. She told me to lick them. It was like Christmas. It was surreal. I hadn't imagined that a regular person would let me enjoy this. Everyone that I knew always frowned about any kind of fetishes. She shoved her little foot into my face. I was amazed that my lips stretched all the way around it. It was such a turn on.

"Come here. Put your butt against the pipe. I can fuck you and you can lick my feet at the same time."

In a cow girl variation, she bumped up and down my shaft using the water pipe to pull herself up. Her legs were stretched over my torso. I worshipped her feet. I took in the scent and every little curve and cranny. Worked up and out of control, I moved to fuck her. There was no way of undoing this situation. There was only pushing on and rushing through before Candice would come home. We stood up and I fucked Cat standing. Our mouths devoured each other. We were lost in passion.

Keys clicked in the door. The door scratched over the floor. Candice started yelling in a high pitched tone. She hit her purse on me. I was as busted as could be. But, Cat's pussy felt too good. I was bewitched. I kept fucking on. I rationalized that I was caught already. Another thrust wouldn't make it worth – just one. Yet, it would feel so good. Cat exploded like a randy dog. The situation charged her up even more.

When I turned on the stereo with the remote, I must have crossed a line. It's a little hard to backwards rationalize what happened. However, I turned on the stereo to blast the one heavy metal CD that I loved so dearly. Yet, Candice never let me listen to it in her presence. The drumming and singer blasting, "I come alive in a place where I once died" drowned out Candice quips behind my naked shoulders. That's why I only noticed that she left, when Cat yelled into my eye.

"You did it, boss. She's gone. I'll let you fuck me in my ass, as a treat."

Without a second thought, I pushed my bare penis into her dark pooper hole.

-------------

This story is a re-write of 'Making A Devil Out of Me' by en_extase. When I read his story, I didn't like it. It was too plain, straightforward for my test. The main actor was a retarded pushover. However, the theme of his story stayed with me. One of my writing teachers said, all we can expect of a story is to get a lasting image from it. So, his story worked. It didn't give me peace, until I wrote my own version. There we are.

cowboy109
cowboy109
313 Followers
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11 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

This isn't bad. I preferred the original, but this provided wanking material as well. I do have to say that "dark pooper hole" made me laugh and pretty much ruined the hole thing.

rj228212rj228212almost 11 years ago
Your writing teacher should give you a refund.

First: Get an editor. Or at least learn how to proofread. I mean jesus, dude.

Second: en_exstace is eons better than this. They understands that the largest erogenous zone is the brain. Your version has no subtlety, no build-up, no tact.

Third: Even if you feel the need to re-do someone's story, for the love of all that is classy and right, do NOT explain it after the fact by calling them out. Unless you're asking for a comparison, which based on your level of writing of eroticism, you should not. Ever.

qwikguyqwikguyabout 12 years ago
Rewrite not the equal of the en-extase original

I read your version and what I take from it is the tension and hidden seduction is completely missing. That area of your writing needed more development. The original gave me the tension and suspense and her ultimate success in seducing her interested, but reluctant customer.

One other area...you credited the original author as you should have, but please don't put down the work. You should have just said you wanted to add your own spin to the original.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Not bad

I would have to disagree, I thought your character seemed like an even bigger push-over, and for this story to work, he has to be on some level.

All things considered I would have to say I found the original to be a better story. Though there are elements of that story that didn't quite work for me, I really enjoyed it.

I definitely understand the urge to attempt a rewrite of a story like that, I always found that a story never quite fit my personal fantasy, and that's what drove me to begin writing my own as well.

I think your criticism of the character in the original story was unnecessarily harsh.

I personally don't like the whole foot thing, but it didn't take me out of the story too much. I definitely preferred the ending involving him being caught in the act by his girlfriend, that was an element I had hoped to see in the original.

I think your story would have been better had you taken a more original approach to it overall, only taking a few elements from the story, and working them into something new. The events were far too similar, and in my opinion, were not done as well as the original story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago

come on who lets their girlfriend dictate sex to them? and its planned every sunday? who would do that?

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