Making Choices for Life

I was in the theatre when they came in. I was back in the shadows of the last row so it was really difficult to make me out. I had come to see the recently released Batman movie so I had gone and bought a ticket to see the movie at the new Cineplex.

To say I was shocked to see my girlfriend come in with another guy is a big understatement because I was flat out stunned. She had told me that she was going out with a friend but I had not considered at that point that the friend might be another guy.

I knew him as well from seeing him around on campus, his name was Justin. Justin was an all around nice guy and someone everyone liked including me. He was friendly and would go out of his way to help anyone he considered a friend.

He was laughing and joking about how empty the theatre was and how cool it was to make out in an empty theatre and get your freak on in public and she burst out laughing. Whatever else that would have followed from there was forgotten as more and more people started trickling into the theatre and it got fairly crowded. The lights were dimmed out and the movie started playing.

The movie was pretty ok but truth be told I was constantly overhearing all the flirting going on between the two of them and it made me highly uncomfortable. I could not get up and go and confront them because it would seem as if I was stalking her and I really did not need that drama.

I gave up trying to watch the movie and just stared at the ceiling and tried to figure out the best course of action. My mind wandered back to about two years ago and how my life had progressed since my mom died.

My name is Alex and I am in my first year at college studying to be a psychologist. I had been reluctant at first to come and study because I knew things were tight for my dad and me financially so I had insisted on going and working to save money to help pay my way.

He had laughed and told me that he had received a large settlement recently which would solve all of our problems. He refused to divulge any more information than that and had packed me off to college. His last words to me were to go out and enjoy my college experience.

Two months later into my first year of college I had met Tracy and we had hit it off instantly. The attraction between us was very strong and we had started dating exclusively within a week. She was a fun loving and outgoing person whereas I was shy and often introverted but we complimented each other beautifully. She was studying law and we often had many mock arguments and debates about each others profession of choice.

We had both finally came to the conclusion that a lawyer fucked you financially and a psychologist fucks you mentally. We often laughed whenever we remembered this but we both knew deep within our hearts that we were both going to change the image of both of our professions for the better.

Initially in our relationship we had had to make it clear how we viewed relationships and we had made it clear to each other what we could not accept. She told me straight that if I cheated on her that she would cut my dick off and use it on me as a suppository. The expression on her face told me that she meant every word that she said. I looked her in the eye and told her my beliefs about relationships which were pretty simple.

"I believe that you must treat your partner with respect at all times and I do not believe in cheating as you also do. But I do not believe in beating or harming someone as you just stated." She had looked sheepish and started to apologise but I stopped her before she said anything more.

"I love you as you well know but I will never lay a hand on you even if I caught you in bed with anyone else or the other person because you both made a choice to get into that position. So even though I would be traumatised by your actions I would try to walk away. I cannot and will not punish you for your actions because I know there is a higher power that will mete out justice far better than I."

We had dropped it after that but we had had another discussion afterwards about going out. I had remained firm in my conviction that as long as I was in a relationship I did not condone going out with members of the opposite sex unless my partner was comfortable with the person. She had blown a fuse about this and screamed at me, "Why would I have to get permission to go out of my friends? Are you mad?"

I had responded calmly, "I never said that you could not go out with your friends but I should be known as your boyfriend clearly to any of these guys and I should know who these guys are. Would you be comfortable if I went out with a girl who was attracted to me and whom you did not know?

She had screwed up her face as she pondered it and looked at me hard and shouted "HELL NO!"

"Well there you have your answer then. You can not deal with it and I do not want to have to deal with it either so we are clear on that subject."

Other than those two arguments we had gotten along famously. We struggled sometimes to make time for each other with our messed up time tables and we studied together so that we would see each other.

She had a photographic memory and was really intelligent so she found it easy to have lots of free time and often wanted to go out. I was the type of student who needed to beat the books to keep my grades up so I often had to beg off to study.

She had been understanding and would often just find a friend to go out with instead but it had only struck me now that she had never mentioned the sex of the friend and I had never asked as we had both come to an agreement which apparently only I had been respecting.

Tonight I had called her after deciding to take a night off but her grandmother whom she lived with had told me that she had gone out with a friend. I had thanked her and left home and walked to the bus stop and caught the first one and gotten off at the Cineplex where I now found myself.

The movie credits were coming up when I started to shake myself out of my deep thoughts. When I looked around they were now making there way out of the cinema so I had gotten up and followed about twenty feet behind them. He stopped at his car and turned to her and gave her a light kiss on her lips before they got into the car. As the car reversed the headlights fell on me and she looked up and met my eyes. She paled instantly and slumped into the seat as the car passed me.

I was really pissed off and knew that I needed some time to cool off so I decided to walk home. It was only ten miles so I figured by the time I got home maybe my mood would be a little better. It took me two hours to get home and halfway there the rain started to pour and I got drenched to the bone.

When I got home to my apartment I was not really surprised to see her staked out outside my apartment. She jumped up when she saw me and tried to run and hug me but my outstretched hand and my cold glare stopped her well short. I directed her to go in as I opened the door and slammed it shut behind me.

"I made a mistake but Justin and I am just friends and what you saw was just a friendly kiss, nothing more. I know it was wrong but can't we work around this."

"Was this the first time that you and Jason went out or were you going out well before this?"

Her only response was a slight nod as she kept her head bowed. I waited for a better response as she slowly raised her head and spoke softly. "I went out with him many times over the past year. He has a car and he is a gentleman so he never tries anything. I do flirt with him but it is just flirting that is all, it is just harmless flirting."

"Did you even tell him that I was your boyfriend or did you leave off that part?"

She just shook her head her head and refused to meet my eyes.

"Were you ashamed of me of did you just believe that it was not important that he know you were unavailable? Did you even consider yourself to be unavailable? I was sitting in the corner of the back row when you came in and I watched you and he flirt shamelessly for the entire movie. When he mentioned having sex inside an empty theatre you just laughed and continued to flirt with him. If you had any respect for me you would have shut him down and let him know that you were not interested in him like that."

She stared at me and I could see the veins starting to throb in her temples. "You bastard I did nothing wrong, all I did was flirt a little. I know my limits and there was no way that I would be interested or allow something like that to happen. Do you think I am some sort of slut you asshole."

"No I don't but he did which is why he suggested it and you did nothing to change his mind. All you did was laugh and I will always wonder what would have happened if people had not started to come into the theatre."

"I really do love you but I can not trust you anymore so there is nothing more to say to you so please leave my apartment and have a good life."

She stared at me in shock as my words started to register and then she turned and stormed out of my apartment. She slammed the door so hard that it actually opened back again and I walked over to close it.

We never spoke to each other again after that but I found out from a mutual friend that she and Justin had hooked up a week after we broke up. I was not too surprised to find out that he dumped her when he found out about her previous relationship and the part he had played in it.

I remembered the advice that my dad had given me about women and closed my eyes and said softly to myself "I am trying dad but it is really hard dad, really damned hard." and wiped the tears from my face.