Maxine's New Life Ch. 06

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Maxine's new life.
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Part 6 of the 17 part series

Updated 10/09/2022
Created 10/23/2011
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Lit 6 14-20

14 pick a side

Max Stone, the sign read. It was being held by my best friend, Jennifer. Well, she used to be my best friend. She was about to have a real problem. Jennifer hugged me tight and asked, "How are you? Are you still mad at Marty?"

"Who me? I'm not mad. I'm just going to sue his ass off. You are going to have to pick your side on this one."

"Marty has been my client since I started practicing," Jennifer said.

"I have been your friend since grade school. You still have to choose." I was not about to let her off easy. After all, she had gotten me into it in the first place.

"Tell me what your position is and I'll pass it along. Maybe there won't be any need for a court fight."

"I want the son of a bitch taken out and shot. That's my bottom line position."

"Come on, Max, what damage do you think he did to you?"

"He lied to me and he used me to promote his stupid bike business. Then, when I fought back, he put those pictures of me on the net."

"Now don't get pissed, just listen, then if you still feel the same, I'll deliver your comments. If you two can't come together, I'll recommend good lawyers for you both. I won't represent one of you against the other."

"Okay, that's fair. What is it you have to say in his defense?" I asked.

"For one thing, he told you he was out to demonstrate that the bike was a dependable means of transportation. Okay, he didn't tell you he was setting up a business, but a trial judge is going to split hairs."

"He took pictures of me without my permission and posted them on the net."

"Yes, and some of those are in bad taste, but they haven't been doctored. You were dressed or undressed just like the images show. The pornographic ones you might not have posed for, but you knew you weren't alone with the person whose body parts are also in the pictures."

"Okay, so I'm complicit, but we both know he didn't have a release for those images. You are supposed to have a release, if you use someone's image in advertising, aren't you?"

"Yes and Marty has some culpability for those images used in promoting his business. But, Max, it's going to cost you a ton to sue. Marty can stall this till hell freezes over and your lawyer is going to want to be paid. If the best you can do is ten grand, nobody is going to want to touch your case."

"Well, my big plan was to sue him for reckless endangerment. He sent me out on a bike that he knew was overpowered and poorly balanced. He didn't even bother to warn me. I swerved to avoid a collision with a coyote and the bike threw me off."

"Yes and what are the permanent damages?"

"A couple of scars are about all I can come up with now, but you never know what will show up next year."

"Max, you can do that to Marty and ruin his new business venture. That's what you really want to do. You want to castrate him because he didn't tell you everything. Then again his lawyer is going to ask you about the pictures. Just to be sure you aren't doing the woman scorned thing to him. You aren't are you?"

"Not scorned, Jen, lied to and used."

"Okay, what do you think that is worth?"

"I don't know," I replied.

"I do. See what he really did was make a half dozen commercials using your image. If he had hired a professional model to make those images, it would have cost him about 75K. He sent you out on that bike, and yes, he knew it was dangerous. It will be up for debate how much you knew, but he had another 25K worth of liability there. He did pay you for everything else, except that sex, and you really don't want to sue for that do you?

"Of course not."

"Then ask the dirty old man for 100K and walk away from it. That's my advice."

The conversation took place in her BMW as she drove me to Marty's shop for my minivan. "I'll give it some thought," I replied. We were still five minutes out, so I just shut up for the rest of the ride.

"So, was the trip fun otherwise?" she asked.

"It actually was a blast, even the parts that weren't," I suggested with a small smile.

"Good, so what are your plans now?" Jen asked.

"I'm going to get the van and then go to the office to see what is left of my business."

"Well, speaking of that, Lucas has called me a dozen times in forty days. I think that is pretty damn good."

"Yes, if that's all it took to keep the place going, it is damn good. Of course, if it's because he didn't do shit, then it isn't so good."

"Good point, Max, I don't know which it is." She paused a long moment, then went on. "Ted is going to meet us to open the door so you can get your car. I called ahead and Ted said his dad ordered him to give you the car and write you a check for the balance of the account. That isn't going to include the 100K."

"Of course not, it's just five grand."

"Good, then that won't be a problem. I'll start working on the other, but Marty probably won't decide for a while. His case will be stronger if the trip didn't light a fire in the public. Your case will be stronger if it did. So both of you should wait to see what the reaction of the public is."

"Perfectly logical advice, but I want to hang him by his balls, no matter what it is," I replied.

"Guess what, Max? He wants to do the same to you since you ruined his press conference. You called his bike a death trap."

"Duh, yeah," I replied laughing.

Ted met us at the door to his dad's shop. "Hello, Max," he said, handing me an envelope. Inside was a check for five thousand dollars. "That covers the balance on your contract." He paused a moment, then went on. "Yes, I know there are other issues, but that's between the two of you. I am sorry about those pictures he put up last night. He should not have done that."

"Thanks, Ted, I agree about that. Well, I need to get to my office." I turned my attention to Jen. "Call me and we will do lunch," I suggested.

When I got to the office, Ed gave me a big hug. I barely recognized Lucas. "My God, Lucas, have you grown a foot or what?"

"Nothing like that," he replied.

"The kid has matured, not gotten taller, Max. He jumped right in and did a hell of a job for you," Max whispered to me. I don't think he wanted the kid to know how impressed he was.

"So anything exciting happen since I've been gone?" I asked loud enough for both of them to hear, then I sat at my desk and turned on the computer. While it came to life, I listened to Ed telling me about his latest woes with the bail jumpers. "Before you ask, I do not want to run down your bail jumpers." I said just loud enough to carry across the room.

"What about me?" Lucas asked.

"What about you?" I repeated to him.

"Now that you are back, there isn't enough work for me even part time. I could run down bail jumpers for Ed."

"In spite of his whining, he doesn't have that many," I replied, "Besides which, you don't have any idea how to be a bounty hunter."

"You could teach him," Ed suggested. The look I gave him would have made Superman proud. Ed threw up his hands and said, "Just saying, you could show him the ropes."

"You want me to open a new can of worms, then Luke here goes back to school and I am stuck working my bony ass off," I said.

"You just loved saying that, didn't you?" Ed said, laughing.

"Saying what? Telling you no?" I asked.

"Hell no, the bony ass thing. Ever since you got here last winter you have been bitching about those few extra pounds. The blown out gullet, and the road trip were all it took for you to get skinny." Ed said firmly.

"Hey, I don't mind looking good for a change," I replied.

"You always looked good, besides you have lost too much weight now, if you ask me."

"Don't worry, they are still making donuts down at Krispy Kreme, it won't take long."

"Good, I'm buying the first dozen." Ed was proud of himself for successfully harassing me again. The man treated me as he wished he could treat his own daughter. Her he could not speak to without it turning into WW3. She was ashamed of what he did for a living. The two of them went out of their way to avoid having any real conversations.

"Please, Ms. Stone," Lucas begged.

"Lucas, surely you can see that I don't want to work that hard. You know you are going to be a cop and I will be left with the work and no help. You really need two people to do bail pickups. If you don't, eventually someone is going to get hurt. I haven't always been the lucky one. Sometimes it me on the bloody end of the stick."

"You know I can't promise to never leave you, but there are lots of people who need work. You could always replace me."

"Well, it does fit in with the process serving, in a way."

"I can get you work from Tryon. I know all those boys over there. I know what kind of service they get from the guy over there who runs jumpers."

"What's he like?" I asked.

"He's a court sanctioned thug, that's what," he said firmly.

"I wish you guys had given me a couple of days to settle back in before you dropped this on me."

"So, are you doing to do it?" Ed asked.

"Lucas, do you really want to do this?" I asked. If he came up with some pie in the sky bullshit, my answer was going to be hell no."

"Ma'am, I want to work, and this job has been good for me so far. Mr. Martin says it won't be a huge amount of work, but he thinks that I can do it. So yes, Ma'am, I want to at least try it."

"You do know at least one of the guys you pickup is not going to want to come along peacefully."

"Yes Ma'am, I know."

"You are prepared to bring down an ass whuppin' on some guy whose only crime is like bank fraud?"

"If it's him or me, and I can make it him, yes Ma'am, I'm willing to do that."

"Ed next one you get that you can't talk in, give him to me and we will try."

"Here you go. You shouldn't have any problem with her, I'm sure she really wants to do the right thing."

"You been saving this for me. You just knew you two could talk me into it."

"Not at all, Max. I just hadn't got around to calling the thug yet," Ed swore.

I looked at the name on the file. 'Lori Simpson' was handwritten in Ed's very neat script. He told me when I asked earlier, that he had learned to print in high school drafting class. His printing was as good as any typewriter I had ever seen.

Inside were police reports and court reports. The top item in the file was a bench warrant for Lori. She didn't appear for her DUI trial. "What kind of penny ante bullshit is this Ed, DUI?"

"If you read a little more closely, I'm in for a 100K on Lori the Lush. Third offense, and she put a kid in a wheelchair."

"You do have all the information to find her, if she isn't in the wind." I said flipping pages.

"You know she is gonna be near mama or one of her boyfriends."

"How about the boyfriend, is he dangerous?"

"Let us say you shouldn't turn your back on him."

"Terrific, okay, let me call and up my liability insurance and we will give it a go. But just on Lori the Lush for now."

"Oh, welcome back, Max," I mumbled under my breath.

15 Home again

My first night back in the cabin where I lived, I found myself cleaning 40 days worth of dust and grime from the counters and dishes. Open cabinets did that. I managed that while trying to figure out how best to hunt down bail jumpers. I started with some basic assumptions. Neither Lucas, nor I were every going to intimidate the bad guys with our looks. If we intended to do this and be successful, we would have to outsmart the prey.

I remembered the story of my friend the Air Policeman who had to pick up a deserter. The man was huge and he had done two tours as a combat air controller in Iraq. After that second tour, he decided he had done his part. I tended to agree with him, but the powers that be sent one of my friends after the giant of a man. The kid they sent was young, and slight of build, but he was from West Virginia. He had grown up hard in and around the coal mines. He knew no fear it seemed, but he was also smart.

He waited till the giant went to the bathroom after having several beers in a local beer joint. Then while giant had his hands full, so to speak, my friend walked up and stuck a pistol in the back of his neck. The giant zipped up then put his hands behind his back, where my friend cuffed them. I asked my friend why he had done such a cowardly thing. He said, "Okay it wasn't the John Wayne thing to do, but it kept me from getting my ass whipped, so it was the Norman Brice thing to do."

I decided that I needed to start thinking of the Norman Brice thing to do. If I couldn't be tough enough, then I had to be smart enough. Either that or plan on using my accident insurance often. After my adventure with the bike and the small town doctor, I decided I would give being smarter my best shot.

Since there was going to be a chill in the air that night, according to the TV. Yes, before I left, I had satellite TV installed. Mostly it was for the news and weather, since the shows were mostly crap. As I was saying, since there was going to be a chill, I fired up the oil heater which had come with the cabin. I wasn't sure how safe it was, but I had to try it sometime.

I followed the directions on the back of the stove and sure enough it began to put out heat. Since it sat in one corner of the one room cabin, I figured I needed some kind of blower for the small heater. A quick search of the one standing cabinet revealed a small plastic box fan. Since it had a carry handle and since there was a big ass nail over the heater, I figured that was the spot. Most likely it was the place the previous tenant had used for it.

A half hour after I started the heater, I had to turn it down to its lowest possible setting. While I drank coffee from the Mister Coffee machine, I began asking myself questions, trying to decide how to outsmart the bad guys.

If you came to my door, who would you have to be for me to cooperate? Someone I didn't fear for sure. If I was in the wind, I would really be careful who I trusted. That made trying to find a way to con the bad guys even harder. There was no way I could pretend to be a friend, since obviously the bad guys would know their friends.

If not a friend, then what kind of stranger would seem harmless? Even better, what kind of stranger would I trust and want to help? I was trying to remember who all I had known that fell into that category. At that point, I remembered the UPS delivery of my pistol from California. It would be due a couple of days down the road. If they showed up at the office with it, I would expect Ed to sign for it, or to tell them where to find me, if the driver insisted.

Since I ran a kind of delivery service already, I could use that to my advantage. What I needed to do was to set myself up as a courier service. Something like, "Priority Messenger, when it's that important." Not a bad slogan for the outside of my van. It could also help me deliver my court papers. Not a bad idea, I thought.

I did a quick Internet search and found that it wouldn't cost more than a hundred bucks to have signs made for the minivan. Not a bad investment if I helped me with my real business as well. Not only that, but best of all it was deductible.

I did not want Lucas running around with a gun, so what should I arm him with. Taser, of course, there was no question about it. And gas, since I couldn't get nerve gas, pepper spray would have to do. A bean bag shotgun would probably be okay. He might get me sued with it, but maybe he wouldn't land me in jail.

Then there was the bulletproof vest and radio equipment we would need. I know the thug, as I had come to think of the competition, didn't spend his money on toys, but we were going to be a kinder, gentler, bounty hunting agency. That pretty much gave me a starting plan for the next day. So I could now either put a pot pie in the microwave or go to the Cop Out.

"Holy Shit, look who's here," Blevins said. He hugged me with what I felt was genuine warmth.

"Hey, Blevins, did you miss me?" I asked, "Or is that a gun in your pocket?"

"You bet, it's been way too quiet around here, and it's a gun, but it shoots blanks."

"Well, hell, put a dollar in the Juke Box and I'll dance on the table."

"Would you really?" he asked.

"Yes, but after a couple of minutes you would tell me to get the hell off that table."

"Ah, but would you take your clothes off?"

"I don't know, Blevins, how does this crowd tip?"

"Really awful, not that I know from experience. One of the waitresses told me."

I nodded. "So, Blevins, how did that kid you sent me make out?"

"He must have done fine; he didn't call me for help."

"Do you know much about him?"

"Not really; you planning to keep him around?"

"Yeah, Ed seems to like him. I thought I might give him some work. You know, while he finishes out at the community college."

"That's nice of you, Max, but don't get him into too much. He is just a kid."

"Hell, Blevins, he told me he had a ten inch prick. Don't sound like all that much of a kid to me."

"He told you that, but you haven't seen it have you?"

"No, why, don't tell me you think a man would lie about that."

"Of course men lie about that," he said.

"Damn it, Blevins, I asked you not to tell me that. Now I will have to keep the kid around and try to sneak a peek to be sure."

"Do you have enough work to keep him around?"

"Ed wants me to find a couple of his skips. I figured I would use him for that."

"Max, I told you not to get that kid involved in anything dangerous."

"Come on, it's not like we have Charlie Manson here. Most we have is a wife beater. Even I can kick those guys in the balls."

"You have been warned," Blevins said.

"Max, when the hell did you get home?" one of the regulars asked.

"I got back this morning."

"I seen your pictures on the net, nice," he added.

"I'm so glad,"

"No, Max, I mean I really saw you," he was all grins.

"Well, I hope you saved them cause there won't be any more up there," I turned away to face Blevins. "I'm going to kill Marty when he gets back,"

"Don't say that, Max. Something might happen to him, and then I would come looking for you."

"Blevins, if something happens to him, please come looking for me. I would feel slighted if you didn't."

"Okay, if you insist."

"Where's Jerry," I asked.

"Jerry doesn't come around like he used to."

"Yeah, I guess not," I replied. I was thinking of Sarah and feeling guilty again. I looked around then commented. "There are some new faces, though."

"Yeah, they come and they go," he replied, as if it was a piece of Oriental wisdom.

"Kind of like my love life," I replied.

"Yeah, kinda like that." Blevins had a huge smile. We could be friends because he wasn't one of those guys who had done that. I had exactly two beers and put off two would be lovers before I went home alone. I had forgotten how good it felt to sleep in a familiar bed.

Things usually look different after a night's sleep. The things on my mind at that time were no different. I hate boredom, as I have said before, so the thought of chasing people on the run interested me a lot more after a good night's sleep.

While in the shower, I decided for sure to take the minivan in for a sign declaring that it belonged to an overnight local courier service. The sign maker consultation would be about what kind of sign. Since the decision to do it was made, I began searching for a name.

Believe it or not, hot water mixed with soap rubbed into the hair, is excellent for fostering imaginative thinking. I had called my little process server business 'At Your Service' so that part as a slogan was a natural. I tried out and disregarded several ideas before I settled on.

LIGHTNING EXPRESS At Your Service

I felt like it had a nice ring and didn't really say anything. In my case that's exactly what I wanted.