I noticed my hand shaking as I reached for the door and stopped to pull myself together. I couldn't believe I was doing this. I kept thinking if I was so scared how's he feeling. Poor little guy. But then this is what he'd wanted.
He's my college roomie and at 5' 6" he really is just a little guy, but cute as a button. At least I think so. Me? I tower above him like nobody's business, by an entire foot if you can believe it. He's a skinny guy with these graceful moves sort of like a dancer. He may not be a muscle bound jock but I really go for his looks. Like I said, cute as a button. And smart? Let me tell you. He studies constantly and keeps me studying. I'm actually getting high marks this semester because of Billy. That's his name, Billy.
He's been my roomie for about two months now and at first he was afraid of me. Took me two weeks to get him to talk to me and then I had to corner the poor guy like a rabbit. Man, did he shake, I thought he was gonna pee his pants looking at me like he thought he was my next meal. Course I wouldn't have minded eating him up, starting at those juicy lips of his and working my way down from there.
If Billy only knew how I felt about him, but it'd probably scare him even more. I mean how do you tell a poor shivering bundle of nerves that you don't want him on a dinner plate but in your bed every night, that any licking and slurping you do would be to his delectable body in many pleasurable ways. He'd probably go into a coma or something. I didn't even know if he was gay since I couldn't get him to stay in our room long enough to talk.
So one day I cornered him, actually in a corner by a window. I figured if he was desperate enough to try going out a three story window then I'd have to give him up. I wasn't ready to do that yet without at least trying.
"H-h-hey J-jake, I gotta g-go study. S-s-someone's expecting m-me." he squeaked and stuttered at me. I felt like a bully, but I wasn't letting him go yet.
"Billy, ease up, man. I just want to get to know you. We're roomies!"
The suspicion and fear in his eyes was killing me. Reminded me of a neighbor's dog when I was in high school. Kids had always been mean to this dog and it was afraid of it's own shadow. Remembering that dog gave me an idea though.
I hunkered down to make myself as small as possible which gave him the advantage of looking down at me. I could see a little of the fear subside as I became a little less threatening. He tried to step past me and I felt so bad that I almost let him go, but I knew this would probably be my only chance with him.
"Billy, I think you're a really cool guy, I'd really like to be friends." I tried to speak quiet and soothing. I didn't much care what I said, as long as he relaxed and stayed. "I live back east so I don't know no one out here and I could use a friend."
"Anyone... I don't know anyone."
"You either? So maybe we..."
Suddenly he giggled. Yeah, giggled. "I meant that you used a double negative." I must have looked like a typical dumb jock, because suddenly he was outright laughing. "You said 'I don't know no one', you should have said 'I don't know anyone'."
Well, by that time he could have corrected every word out of my mouth because his laughing seemed to push all his fear and suspicion away and he didn't have that 'prey vs. predator' look anymore. Since he was calmer I figured I'd go for broke and be a little more open with him.
"I'm glad you're talking to me now. You seem like a nice guy and I notice that you don't pal around with anyone in particular, so I thought we could hang. I really could use a friend, Billy, and it seems you could use a friend, too."
"People usually overlook me," he muttered quietly, "so I haven't made any friends here yet. I came up from California, so I don't know... no one either." he continued with a grin.
I stood up slowly, and damn if he didn't watch me all the way up. A little fear came back but not near as much as before, "So how about I buy you a burger and we can get to know each other?" Running through my head was 'Please, please say yes'.
He hesitated so long I thought he'd chicken on me again. Then finally, "OK, but only if you let me buy next time."
So over the next couple of months I'd say that he became the best friend I've ever had. I hoped he felt the same, but he hadn't really said it. Up until now I hadn't told him that I was gay and until a week ago I didn't know if he was or not. I mean, how can I say something like 'I'm gay and I like you a lot' when the guy still goes all scared on me if I move too fast. He trusts me, I know that, but he's told me a little about his life in high school. Shit, no one should have to go through that crap whether they're gay, fat, handicapped or anything 'unacceptable' to the general public image. (Sorry, I'm stepping off the soapbox now.)
So a week ago, Billy tells me about an assignment from his 'Human Sexuality' class that's about writing a paper on fantasies.
"So what kind of fantasies do you mean, like sex stuff or what you'll do 10 years from now?" I really was interested in what he had to say because I'd discovered an intelligent and perceptive mind in his little head.
"Both," Billy answered. "Any type of fantasy, even day dreams. They're fantasies of a sort, too."
"You use your fantasies or someone else's."
"Anyone's. But we need to start with one of our own that is hard to share. You know, one of those deep dark fantasy things. I don't think I can share my deepest one, so I'm settling for a lesser one." He turned so red when he said it that I got curious. He's even cute when he blushes. Boy, I got it bad, don't I?
We talked some more and I shared some general fantasies I'd had with him, being careful to edit myself. I wanted to out myself, but didn't want to lose him.
"What're your sexual fantasies?" I asked as casually as possible, "One of mine is to fulfil someone else's fantasy. I know that's a little weird, but it just seems like such a turn on to be able to do that for someone you care about."
"Have you ever tried doing it before, Jake?" I could see his wheels turning, "And if not, then why haven't you yet."
"Billy, it's like this..." I almost said it, but at the last minute I couldn't. "I've never been with anyone yet, I mean being a virgin at 18 isn't that big a deal but it's hard to go fantasy fulfilling if you don't have nobody."
"Anybody. Don't have anybody. But yeah, I know what you mean. You're not the only virgin around here." He said it so matter of factly I was surprised, I thought he'd blush.
"So, Billy, I've told you some of my fantasies, what's one of yours. If you can trust me, tell me the one you won't share in your paper." I figured the worst that could happen was he'd say no, but if I was lucky he'd trust me enough to share. It'd tell me a lot about him if he did.
"Well, uh... it's embarrassing... uh," he blushed as he mumbled in indecision. I stayed quiet and enjoyed his cute blushes. God, I wanted to scoop him up and feast on him.
"My deepest fantasy... I've never told anyone before. This is hard." he said looking me straight in the eyes. Taking a deep breath, he spoke rapidly as if he had to say it before he chickened out. Which was probably the case. "But one of my biggest fantasies is to be blindfolded, with my hands bound above my head and have someone I can't see make slow gentle love to me." He cringed back and closed his eyes. "A guy. I want a guy to do it." he finished in a whisper.
I must have looked like a goldfish the way my mouth kept opening and shutting. I couldn't figure out what to say there were so many things in my head. Grabbing and kissing him was only one of them. I was thrilled and suddenly scared, shy and tingly all at the same time.
"I'm sorry, Jake, maybe I shouldn't have told you. I'm not... don't think... I didn't mean to alarm you. I shouldn't have said anything. Forget it, OK? Friends still?"
The desolate look on his face snapped me out of it immediately. "Billy, it's alright. You just took me by surprise. Man, I didn't think you'd have the guts to tell me, then you went one better." I hesitated because now was the time to tell him about me. "So you're gay then? In fact, I... I... don't see why that will affect anything. And your fantasy sounds pretty cool if it's with the right person." Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I chickened out bigger that Billy ever did. I'd never told anyone but my family before and all of a sudden I couldn't get the words out of my mouth.
The next few days I moped around kicking myself constantly for the big idiot that I am. I did my best to hide it from Billy 'cause I didn't want him to get the idea that it was what he'd said.
Two days ago I figured out what my real problem is. I couldn't tell Billy because it's more than just about me being gay. It's about how I feel about him, I mean he's my best friend. But he's also become the most important person in my life. I'm not saying I'm in love with him, but maybe I'm falling that way. I guess it helps to realize that I'm not running from being gay, just scared of rejection. Shit, what if doesn't feel the same about me? I'd lose my best friend.
Then something happened and that's how I found myself standing outside that door, scared and yet exhilarated about going inside. See, Billy had come back with his fantasy paper and I was sitting at my desk studying when Billy ran in the room.
"Jake, I got a 'A+' and a 'Very insightful' comment from my teacher! And she's tough. It's only her third 'A' of the semester. Can you believe it?" He threw his arms around me from behind and gave me this huge hug and then just as he pulled away he kissed me on the cheek. "I gotta go, another class, but I just needed to tell you because it was your fantasy that I based my paper on. Catch you later." Then with another kiss this time on my neck just below my ear, he was gone.
I found myself breathing heavily and my hand straying down to the intense tenting in my jeans. I wanted him so bad right then that I decided I had to do something about it and I knew just what to do. All I had to do was figure out how and where without getting caught.
After some thought, the 'where' was easy. There were storage rooms in the basement of our dorm for us to use as we needed. Almost no one went down there because it's dark and musty smelling. How to get him there was trickier. Then I remembered one of the few people I trust besides Billy lives only an hour away, my brother Mike. He's older than me by a couple years but we're really close and what's better is that Billy hasn't met him yet. And yeah, I'd told Billy a lie, but for a good reason.
So I called him, told him the plan although he thinks I'm a freak now, but he went along with me. His only thing was that if it worked he wanted details. I told him that if this worked, that'd be a small price to pay.
I asked Mike how it went when he came to tell me that Billy was set.
"Jake, I still think you're a freak. Billy's scared and you promised that you're not gonna hurt him, right?" I nodded vigorously at him. "Well, he's blindfolded down in room 3. I tied his hands to those pipes on the ceiling, and I don't think he can get loose. Actually I think he's too scared to try. I told him I'd be waiting outside til 'he' -meaning you- arrived. I did say that you'd let him go when you were done. Getting him there wasn't any trouble 'cause he didn't really fight back. Uh, Jake? You might want to take him some clean clothes cause I think he peed on himself. You sure this is the guy you want?"
"Mike, he may be a scared little rabbit, but I'm hoping he'll be MY rabbit. I hope this isn't a mistake, but it's his fantasy. Course it's mine, too 'cause I can make it happen. Do you think he'll hate me? Mike, I couldn't stand it if he hated me. Maybe I shouldn't do this, maybe I've made a big mistake. Shit! What do I do?"
I was falling apart in my fear when Mike gathered up my pieces with a bone crunching hug and squeezed them together again with his words. "Jake, if this is his fantasy then go for it, Dude. If you don't try then you'll always wonder about what might have been. If you really care about him, then try. If he's too scared, stop and apologize. But Jake, what if this works? I love you, bro'. I'm here for you whatever happens."
"Thanks, Mike," I whispered as I leaned into him a moment longer before standing on my own again. "I got my man hanging around downstairs. Gotta go make him feel good."
So there I was, hand quaking on the doorknob wondering if I was the biggest idiot ever to have lived. I recalled Mike's words about trying and pushed open the door.
I could see that Billy had heard me come in when he instantly stilled. One glance let me know that clean clothes were a good idea. At least he'd only peed, though.
I slipped off my shoes and my clothes as quietly as possible. I could see him listening to everything trying to figure out what I was up to. I slowly approached him in an effort to be ultra silent. I must have succeeded because he jumped a mile when I reached for the T-shirt he still had on. Looking up at his bound hands connecting him to the pipes above I wanted to curse my brother. He'd forgotten to remove his shirt and I had no way to get it off. Great start, I thought.
I took a look at the ratty old T-shirt and hoping it wasn't a favorite I ripped it down the front. Poor Billy screeched in terror and I think wet himself again.
I stood still watching him breathe hard for a moment before placing the tip of one finger lightly on his stomach, which he promptly sucked in. My finger followed and I let it trail around his waist as I stepped around behind him. Another rip, this time silence from Billy, and I now had access to the skin of his chest and back, his T-shirt hanging in two tattered halves from his arms. Again just one finger tip, I ran a light touch slowly down his spine to the top of his jeans and around the waistband as I walked around to his front. My finger stopped at the snap of his jeans and I watched his face turn red, probably realizing that I could see his loss of bladder control. But I knew Billy and I wasn't turned off by it. I kept the one finger lightly pressed to his stomach while my other hand undid the snap.
"No." Billy whispered, uttering his first word since I'd entered.
I paused a moment, then lazily lowered his zipper watching his face carefully. If he truly was scared I'd stop, but his face was flushed, he was breathing heavily, and his mouth was slightly open. I knew then that he was fighting his own desires.
I finally moved my finger and without touching skin I grasped his jeans, pulling them to his ankles in one movement. Next were his white briefs, which required brushing him with two fingers. As I lowered them from his hips and over his erect penis, he let out a soft whimper that drew my eyes back to his face. I saw embarrassment and anxiety maybe, but still no fear. Once everything was pooled around his ankles, I began pulling the clothes away from his feet. He hesitated a moment before lifting first one, then the other foot for me.
I was certain now that he was into this even if he was nervous about it. I mean, imagine it will ya? Your fantasy coming true? You'd be nervous too, even without a blindfold.
I stood tossing the wet clothes toward the door and took a moment to admire the sight before me. Like I said before, he's got a dancer's body and now I can see that he's got a very sexy looking 6" penis pointing up to the ceiling. I was suddenly carried away with my own desires and before I could stop myself I placed a kiss on the tip of that rock hard dick of his.
His loud gasp brought me back to reality. I didn't want to go too fast here. I went back to my plan of slow painless torture, at least that's how it felt to me.
Deciding that I liked the one finger method I'd used first, I slowly inserted it into his mouth. I waited patiently while watching the battle on his face until he gave in and began to suck on my finger, circling it with his tongue. When it was wet enough I pulled it out and began rubbing his spit on one nipple, still with only one finger. Then adding my thumb, I began to pinch and twist, concentrating only on that one little nub. I took my time working it, then repeated the same slow manipulation to the other one.
His panting drew me to his face once again, his head now tipped back and his breath coming out loud as he quivered not in fear but lust. Damn, this was turning me on more than I expected. Glancing down I could see my dick leaking and a quick look showed Billy's was doing the same.
Upping the stimulation I brushed his stomach muscles with my whole hand. I let my hand wander over his tight stomach up to his smooth chest. I couldn't stop myself as I began to use both hands in exploring every inch of his chest and stomach while listening to his breath come faster and louder. I dropped to my knees to explore his lower stomach, avoiding his dick, before moving on to his legs. I even stroked his feet before crawling behind him to continue the caressing back up his legs.
I could feel him tense up as I reached his butt, but that didn't stop me. Even his butt is cute. It's kinda small and flat and I love it. I broke down again and placed a soft kiss on one cheek, eliciting another whimper out of him. I would have worried if he hadn't pushed that cute ass back towards me, so I rewarded him with another kiss on his other cheek. I rubbed and massaged his cheeks while slowly bringing my thumbs closer to his crack. I used one hand to caress and explore his crack while the other checked out the super soft skin behind his balls. He spread his legs to accommodate me and his breathing became moans.
Now you have to remember that I've got no experience at this, but when my thumb brushed solidly across his puckered little hole and he gasped so loudly, I couldn't stop myself. I stuck my tongue out and began to rim his hole. I'd heard of it, but didn't know if I could do it. Now here I was rimming and loving every taste of my Rabbit's ass. I had to hold his hips with both hands because of his bucking and twisting, his breath coming now it loud gasps.
I had to try it, so I stiffened my tongue and pushed to gain entrance to his tunnel. I succeeded and almost lost control of my dick at the near scream that emerged from Billy.
"Yes... don't stop... god, don't stop." His words encouraged me to thrust deeper, tasting and experiencing him in a way I never thought I would. But this was Billy, my little Rabbit and I couldn't get enough. He began driving his ass back onto my tongue and if I could have, I would have simply crawled in and made us both happy. Physically impossible? That's too bad, it's how I felt.
I didn't want him cumming too soon, so reluctantly I pulled away to the sounds of his disappointment. As I stood up I allowed my entire body to come into contact with his and as my hard rod slid between his ass cheeks I felt him freeze again. Now you gotta remember here that I'm a foot taller than Rabbit, some things just don't fit the way you'd like. So I stopped where I was which is to say, with my knees bent at an awkward angle so I could leave my cock right where it was until I knew how my Rabbit was going to respond. After just a few seconds he squeezed his ass around my cock and let his head fall back to rest on my shoulder, so I knew he was still OK.
Staying in full body contact I slid around to his front, my cock pressed tight against his stomach, his too low for me to feel. Couldn't have that, this was about him not me. So I pulled him into my arms and lifted him up completely off the ground, adjusting so that our cocks were trapped tightly between us. His legs wrapped around my hips leaving my hands free to make love to him. He leaned back away from me a little using the ropes to support his weight while his legs held on. I reached between us and began to slowly jack us both by holding our cocks together. I thought that he was close and I knew that I was but I tried to keep my strokes slow and steady. I wanted this to go on for a lot longer if I could.