My Secret Love Ch. 06

Warning: This does contain material involving same sex relations, if you are offended by this in any way then don't read it. This is only for fun, and not meant for anything else.

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I heard the alarm at 5am that morning, moaned slightly to myself from the interruption of my sleep. A slight hangover from the alcohol the previous night ripped through my head. I rolled over placing the pillow over my head as I heard Lauri ruffling around the room getting her things ready for her day back at work.

I again moaned and moved the pillow back under my head. It was way too early in the morning for this, especially after the events of the night before with Lauri and I, and the alcohol that had been consumed. I wasn't use to drinking much to begin with, and being in recovery from my injuries didn't help much and I guess it didn't take much for the alcohol to have it's affects on my body. I peeled open my eyes and looked at Lauri as she got dressed and ready.

"How are you feeling this morning Lauri?" I said with a croak in my voice. I cleared my throat a little.

"Actually not too bad Samantha. The question is.." She said as she looked over at me while dressing, "..how are you feeling Samantha?"

"I have a little hang over, and besides the fact that it's 5am in the morning, I guess I'm fine." I said smiling.

"Are you going to be okay today while I'm at work Samantha?"

"Yeah, I should be fine. Don't worry about me. Give me a couple more hours of sleep and I'll be okay."

"Well I'll come home at noon to get lunch for the both of us, and if you need help with anything, just call over to the clinic and I'll come right back if there is a problem."

"I'm sure things will be fine Lauri. I'm moving around alot better now, and before long I'll be out of your hands."

Lauri just gave me a look with that remark. "Samantha, listen, about last night...I wanted to.."

"Lauri, please, what was said was said. There's no need to explain anything more on it. And right now I'm a bit too tired and hung over to really think too clearly anyway. So anyway how bout we just focus on me recovering and I'll be out of your hands before long and you can focus on reconciliating with your husband."

"Samantha..." Lauri paused and was about to say something and decided against it. Lauri finished getting ready and turned to leave the room, than turned back looking over at Samantha.

"Samantha, I'm going down for some coffee, do you want me to bring you up any before I leave for work? I'll leave some muffins down stairs on the counter for you as well."

"No, that's alright. Thanks though. I just want to sleep a little right now. You have a good day at work and I'll see you at lunch then." I rolled over turning my back to Lauri after I said that.

Lauri looked back at me before going down the stairs. "Okay, Samantha, you have a good day as well and I'll see you later."

"Bye" I said muffled as I pressed my face into the pillow holding in my tears. I didn't know how to be so polite and civil especially after the previous night. I still was a little hurt and angered over all that had happened. And a little sad over realizing that Lauri and I would never be.

After last night just made me realize that Lauri belonged with her husband. I know she cared for me but she was too confused and I just couldn't be on this roller coaster of hers anymore. I would be there for her as a friend, but I knew I had to be careful with my own feelings for her and not cross that line again. I don't deny that I love her, cause I do, but things are just too complicated and too emotionally risky on both our parts to let this continue on beyond friendship. It just can never be, I thought to myself.

I laid there in my thoughts that morning going back and forth with things in my mind as I drifted off and on again as sleep over took me. Thoughts of my recovery I hoped would be quick so I could be out of there as soon as I could. I just didn't know how much longer I could maintain this false front of just being friends with her before my feelings would betray me again.

I barely remember hearing Lauri leave the house as I drifted to and from sleep. I looked at the clock, it was almost noon. "shit" I said to myself as I scrambled out of bed and got dressed and ready before Lauri got back. I made my way quickly to the bathroom and washed myself up as good as I could in the sink since I still wasn't able to have a shower yet because of my cast. Soon after, I heard someone come in the front door.

"Samantha, you up?" Lauri yelled up the stairs.

I came around the corner and walked slowly down the stairs with one of my crutches. I had been getting pretty good at walking now with just one of them. It wouldn't be long now before I could go in for my check up.

"Hi, Lauri. Yep, I'm up. But just barely. I overslept a bit. I guess with some of the alcohol consumed last night affected me more than I had realized." I said coming down the stairs. "Actually I'm surprised your feeling okay since you drank more than me last night."

Lauri smiled at me as she helped me over to the couch. "Well I had a little of a headache this morning but other than being a little tired myself, I feel pretty good."

"So Lauri, how did clinic go today? I bet it feels a bit weird getting back into the work scene again having the past week or so off."

"It went real well so far this morning Samantha, though I do have to head back there in an hour. So how have you been doing? Will you be okay here again this afternoon by yourself?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine Lauri. I hope you know how much I do appreciate you helping me these past few weeks, not only at the hospital but the last few days here and all. I don't know how I could have ever done any of it by myself."

"Well, I'm more than happy to have helped Samantha. Besides, it has given me a chance to get to know you better and to have found a wonderful friend in you."

"Friend?", I thought to myself. "It seems that you are forgetting a few minor things Lauri that has happened." I shook those thoughts from my mind. "Yes, Lauri, you are a good friend." I turned smiling at her as I squeezed her hand for emphasis.

Lauri cleared her throat and pulled her hand away a little nervous. "So Samantha, what do you feel like for lunch?"

"Well since you have to get back to work soon, don't worry about anything really, okay?"

Lauri walked over to the phone and started to dial a number. "What type of pizza do you like?" She said as she looked over at Samantha.

"Any kind Lauri, whatever you like will be fine with me."

So Lauri ordered a pizza, and came back to the couch as we chatted on general things of the day while we waited for the pizza to arrive. We definitely avoided any subject on the previous nights events. But I was glad for that. I guess she wants to be friends, I thought to myself, and maybe it's best that way anyway.

The pizza had arrived and we ate quickly as Lauri had to get back to work. After eating Lauri cleared the table of our pizza mess, and came back to the couch.

"Well I better get back to the clinic, are you sure you'll be okay here for the rest of the afternoon?"

"Lauri, it's only for a few more hours and believe me I think I can manage." I said smiling. "Besides I'm feeling so much better lately that I'll be out of your hands in no time at all."

"Well okay Samantha, but call me if there is any problems. I took out a roast for dinner tonight to thaw out for us, that is, if that's alright with you?"

"Lauri, that's fine. I wish you didn't feel the need to cook and do so much for me. One of these days I'll have to cook for you."

"It's really not a bother Samantha. In fact I have really liked having you around to do things for. I think I'll miss you when you leave. I'm getting use to having you around, you know."

I smiled at her. "That's really nice to say Lauri. I think I'll miss being here as well, but I suppose we have our life's to get back to here eventually and you to yours and your family as well."

I paused and cleared my throat. It was getting a bit too stuffy and too close for comfort there that I had to end that conversation quickly before I ended opening up too much of my feelings again. I moved away slightly but Lauri moved a little closer and leaned in closer to me and held my hand.

"Samantha," Lauri paused a little and reached her hand up and caressed my face. She looked so lovingly into my eyes that it pierced my heart and my soul. "I hope you know how much I care about you and have grown to love about you." Lauri leaned closer and kissed me slightly on my lips.

I grew very nervous and red flags immediately went up in me. This is not going to happen to me again, I had thought. I can't get hurt again. I pulled away abruptly from her gentle kiss.

"Umm...Lauri," I gathered my bearings for a second there from what had just happened. "so umm..well I suppose you better get to work before your late." I said smiling, acting as nothing had just happened though my actions were very jittery and nervous.

Lauri seemed a little hurt by my pulling away but slowly got up to leave. "Your right, I better get moving here, I don't want to be late as you said." Lauri seemed a little lost for words and felt a little awkward. "Well, I'll umm see you in a few hours then."

Lauri grabbed her purse and headed out the door. I sat there and said goodbye, as she finally left I took a deep inhale like I had been holding my breath the entire time in fear of what she would say or do, but she didn't say anything and left. Well that went smoothly, didn't it Samantha. I shook my head in unbelief. What the hell is she thinking? After all the shit that has gone on with her and I with this, I mean, what is she thinking?

Just then the phone rang. I didn't know whether to answer it or not, so I let Lauri's machine answer.

"Hi, this is Dr. Sou calling for a Samantha Pearson, if you can have her call me back.."

I got up quickly and hurried over to the phone as quickly as I could before he hung up. I answered the phone out of breath.

"Hi, Dr. Sou. This is Samantha speaking."

"Hi, Samantha. How are you doing?"

"I'm doing really well Dr. Sou. In fact, I was thinking about calling you this week to ask when I could set up an appointment."

"Well, whenever you feel up to it, come in, and we'll check your cast out and see how that has healed up enough to have it removed or not. What about your ribs, and the stiches, how are you feeling with that?"

"Actually, my ribs feel really good. A little tightness still, but other than that I hardly notice any discomfort. My stiches look great, and almost dissolved, and my bruises are hardly evident anymore, I'm glad to say."

"Well that is great news Samantha. Well if you feel up to it how bout we schedule you an appointment the beginning of next week sometime."

"Okay, that sounds good to me. Do you have an opening on monday?"

"Yes, early that morning around 10am. Is that good for you?"

"That's great Dr. Sou. Okay. I'll see you then. Goodbye."

"Goodbye Samatha." Dr. Sou said as I hung the receiver up.

I smiled to myself. Finally I can get this damn cast off and have a real bath. Oh..my car. I'll need some transportation. I walked back over to the phone. My brother John had my car sitting at the auto shop all this time and I had totally forgot to call them when I first got out of the hospital to ask about the car. I picked the receiver up after searching the phone book for the number.

"Hi, this is Samantha Pearson calling. A John Pearson had you guys fix up my car about a month ago I would say, actually longer than that, but anyway I was calling about my car and when it will be ready to have picked up."

"Um...let's see here. Okay, I see your name in our book here. Yep, John Pearson had your car towed here couple of months ago. Its been repaired and sitting on our lot now the past few weeks ready to go. So whenever your ready for it, just stop on by and we have the keys for you."

"Would monday afternoon be okay."

"Yeah, that will be fine."

"What about charges?"

"They've all been taken care of by John. So there's no extra costs."

"Okay, thank you. I'll come by on monday. "

I hung up the phone. Wow, John sure takes care of me, I'll have to make sure to thank him next time I call him. Well the car is taken care of, my doctor's appointment taken care of, now only if the rest of my life(personal life) would go as smoothly.

I wasn't sure if I would tell Lauri just yet about my doctor's visit. So I'll just wait on that. The rest of the afternoon went smoothly. I basically relaxed in front of the tv but soon got bored. Well maybe I can get started on some supper for Lauri and me, I thought to myself.

I went to the refridgerator and found some corn, carrots, and beans and pulled them out of the freezer and fridge. I found the potatoes and peeled a couple of them. While doing that I had the roast broiling a little first in the oven sauteed with some onions before baking it. I spent the rest of the afteroon preparing dinner. I found some flour and started on my homemade gravy. It was almost 430pm so Lauri would be home soon, so I put in the vegetables and basted them with the roast. I poured a little of the roast's juices into my gravy to give it that extra flavor.

Earlier I had found a cake mix and made a cake and icing. I dipped my finger into the icing...hmmm...that is going to be good. Well it all was done, just needed another hour and it would be done. I rushed into the bathroom and cleaned myself up a little and changed clothes before Lauri would get home. I went back to the couch and relaxed for a few minutes before I had heard Lauri coming in the front door.

The smell of the roast filled the whole house for as soon as Lauri walked in she made a comment at house great it smelled.

"Mmmm...Samantha, what have you done? That smells wonderful. You shouldn't have. Your not hundred percent yet, and you should have let me cook for you. But I must say the roast smells great."

Lauri walked in and put her things down and walked over and sat down next to me. "So is there anything left I can do to help with dinner, or have you done it all already?" Lauri said smiling.

"Nope, its all done, about an hour and it will be ready. So you just go get changed and relax before dinner."

"Samantha you shouldn't have. Here I am the one who is suppose to be taking care of you."

"Well I wanted to. You've been taking care of me and have been there for me the past few weeks so I wanted to do something for you. Besides I was bored with the tv and wanted to keep busy, and it helped to keep me busy with that."

"Well thank you Samantha for doing this. It's actually nice to come home to a cooked meal. I'm so use to being the one to cook all the time."

I smiled at Lauri and grabbed her hand. "Well, as long as I am staying here and am able enough, you don't have to be the one to cook all the time. Besides I like to cook when I can. I hope you like my cooking anyway, maybe after you taste it you won't want me to be the cook anymore." I said jokingly.

"I'm sure it will be great Samatha. If it tastes anything like it smells then I'm sure it will be fine."

"Well why don't you go get changed and dinner should be ready then soon."

"Okay, I'll be right back. You relax now Samantha and let me take care of the rest. I'll get the table set and all, okay?"

"Okay, sounds good to me."

"I'll be right back." Lauri said as she went up the stairs to change.

Lauri came down a few moments later in sweats and a t-shirt but looked really nice and casual at the same time. It was nearing 530pm and the dinner was ready. Lauri and I had been talking about how work and clinic had gone that day for her when the oven's buzzer went off.

Lauri got the roast out and placed it on the dinner table along with the rest of the food, and gravy as we both sat down and dished up our plates.

We both began digging in. "Mmmm...this is wonderful Samantha, how come you never told me you were such a great cook? And this gravy is really great. Did you make this yourself?"

"Yep, everything is made from scratch, even my homemade gravy."

"Well your going to have to give me your recipe." Lauri said as she continued to eat.

We both polished off our plates along with seconds.

"Well I am totally satisfied." Lauri said.

"Well we're not done yet."

"What do you mean we're not done yet?"

"Look over there behind the counter there. I cooked us a cake for dessert." "Oh Samantha, you shouldn't have. You know your very bad for my diet here." She said smiling.

Lauri brought the cake over to the table. "I'm not sure if I can fit anything more in this stomach of mine, but that cake looks so good that I'll have to try a small piece of it."

Lauri cut a small piece for the both of us and handed me a slice of cake. We both finished off our slices and decided to retire to the couch to relax after that huge meal. Lauri cleared the table and then joined me on the couch.

"Thank you Samantha for that lovely meal. That was really nice of you to do that. And you can cook for me anytime." She said smiling at me.

"I'm glad you liked it Lauri. I enjoyed cooking dinner for you."

"Well I enjoyed it too, but don't be burning yourself out here, remember your still recovering here."

"Don't worry so much Lauri. My body is healing up very nicely, and see here." I pointed to my stiches and bruises on my abdomen. "See there, the bruises are hardly evident anymore."

"Yeah, I guess they are Samantha." Lauri said softly.

Lauri sat there in her thoughts. Soon Samantha would be healed up and out of there. She didn't know what to feel about that. She thought she should feel glad, that way she could get back to her life with her kids and trying to reconcile with her husband, but on the other hand she felt a twinge of pain and heart palpations thinking of Samantha leaving.

"Lauri...Lauri" I said a few more times.

Lauri had drifted off in her thoughts and hadn't heard me call her the first time. "Hmm...what were you saying Samantha." Lauri turned to face me on the couch. "I'm sorry I guess I was in my thoughts there."

"I was just asking if you wanted to put a movie in. Lauri are you okay?"

"Yeah, everything is fine Samantha. Just been a long day and tired a bit I guess. And with that great dinner of yours has totally relaxed me. Anyway, a movie would be great. Any particular one you want to put in. Not like I have a million to choose from." Lauri said jokingly pointing to the few hundred she had displayed in her entertainment center.

"How bout that one." I pointed to the movie called "Up close and Personal"

"Umm...sure Samantha that one would be fine." Lauri thought to herself, yeah that's what we need a romantic movie. Lauri put the movie into the vcr and leaned back on the couch.

We turned all the lights off, and both relaxed into the couch as the movie started. It was dark outside by now so the only light illuminating the room was the tv screen. Lauri had a big screen tv, that combined with the stereo sound and lights off would have made it to be a wonderful romantic evening if it wasn't for us only being friends that is.

Half way through the movie I felt my eyes fighting to stay open as I found myself so dangerously close to Lauri leaning into her. I snapped myself awake and straightened up again.

"Samantha you can lean into me if you want, if it would be more comfortable for you. Here, rest your head on my shoulder."

I wasn't going to argue with her, with the lights off and the effects of the room had on me made me want to relax into her, so I decided for tonight I would put my guard down, and I moved a little closer and adjusted myself leaning into her shoulder. I rested my head into her chest as I felt her arms casually wrap around me, holding me closer to her. I must admit it felt really comforting and nice to feel her close to me like that.