Out of Africa

"Or wanted, by the sounds of things," I threw in.

"That's not fair," Eve stood up for him. "You don't know him. And anyway, I started to get myself out into the world again, and hey presto, I met you."

"Then I forgive him," I grinned at her.

"You should thank him perhaps," she joked with me.

Well, I never did thank him, but the two of us got married, with Sam as the cutest little bridesmaid you could imagine, just two Mars bars keeping her in check all day long, which wasn't bad for such a bundle of energy.

No, I never did thank him, and as it all turned out, then I'm damn glad I didn't!

---------------

Family life suited all three of us, Sam coming to live with us, though Eve's Mum continued to care for her during the day whilst Eve was at work, so it worked out well for everyone. Less than a year into our marriage, and Eve made her announcement that promised to change our lives. It did, but not quite in the way that I expected.

She was pregnant!

Wonderful!

It was just what we wanted, and Sam was as over the moon about it as much as we both were.

"I want a little brother," she informed us.

"It might be a little girl," Eve warned her.

"I s'pose that will be OK," she relented happily. "As long as she doesn't pinch my Mars bars!"

We were going to have to do something about that sometime.

------------------

A few happy months later, Eve asked me to sit down and talk to her after we'd put young Sam to bed.

"I've been thinking," she started off with.

"That's novel," I grinned at her, ducking as the expected cushion flew across the room towards me.

"Seriously Dave," she went on. "With another little one on the way, maybe we ought to be thinking about you and Sam."

"What about us," I replied, cautiously. "We get on really well. There's no problem there."

"I was more thinking about the legal situation," she explained, but I guess I looked a bit blank.

"Adoption Dave," She said at last. "Don't you think it would be a good idea if you officially adopted Sam."

Oh didn't I just!

I guess the way I picked Eve up and smothered her in kisses, served as an answer.

"Let's get it done straight away," I suggested. "No point in hanging around."

But of course there was a problem, one that proved to be a bigger problem than I would ever have imagined.

"We have to get Joshua's permission though," she damped down my enthusiasm with.

"Why?" I demanded. "What's it got to do with him? He hasn't seen her for years."

"He's still officially her father Dave," Eve hit me with. "I now wish I hadn't but when Sam was born, I still had hopes that we may end up together, so I put him down on the birth certificate as her father."

"So what? There's been no contact for years."

"He still pays maintenance Dave," she reminded me, as I honestly had forgotten about that. "It may only be a few pounds a month, but it still goes in our bank account regularly."

Damn!

"We'll have to write to him then," I carried on after thinking it through for a few moments. "He'll probably be glad to be rid of the responsibility."

"Maybe," Eve frowned. "But we don't actually have to write to him."

"Why not?"

"Joshua got in touch with me earlier today Dave," my wife then informed me. "He's back in England again on another of his Crusades. They're raising money for the church back over in Africa, and this time he's heading it."

Now that came like a bolt out of the blue, didn't it? I felt my insides churning at what this new situation might mean to us, and wondered whether Eve had known he was coming, and if so why she hadn't told me.

"I suppose he wants to see Sam, does he?" I asked nervously.

"Yes," Eve answered, clearing her throat, and looking over at me nervously. "He wanted to see me as well."

"What?" I spat out.

"Now don't get upset Dave," Eve calmed me down. "He didn't know about you, or that I'd got married. I should have let him know maybe, so it wasn't his fault."

"I suppose not," I conceded in good grace. "We don't want to upset him or anything, so perhaps we should take young Sam to see him and discuss our plans."

"That's sort of what I suggested."

"Fine then Eve. Set it up."

"Not quite that straightforward honey," she whispered.

"Why? What's the problem?"

"It's complicated Dave," Eve carried on quietly. "It's just that you don't know him. You don't understand quite how self-righteous he can be, almost pompous. He's been bought up in a society where equality is a concept rather than a right, and now that he's moved up in the Church hierarchy, he's got an awful lot of money and power, and seems to think he can have anything he wants."

"And you learnt all this from a phone call?" I queried.

"No honey, not exactly."

"Then how then," I demanded, drawing conclusions. "You've damn well seen him haven't you?"

"Yes," Eve admitted meekly.

"Behind my back!"

"It wasn't like that Dave," she protested. "He rang me out of the blue this morning and asked me to meet him for lunch. It caught me by surprise, and didn't see any reason why not."

"You could have rang me to let me know," I protested, feeling challenged, and strangely uncomfortable.

"I did. Or I tried to, but your office said you were stuck in some important meeting and it didn't seem important enough to disturb you."

"Well that's true enough Eve," I had to admit. "I guess I'm over reacting."

My wife simply shrugged her shoulders and smiled at me. Apparently I was forgiven. But it didn't end there.

"So what did he say about me adopting Sam?" I asked hopefully.

"He wasn't keen Dave to be honest," she replied. "He's very proud. Far too proud really, and he feels that you will be taking something away from him. He's Kikuyu so it's a sort of tribal thing, and that's still very strong back in East Africa."

"But he didn't actually refuse then?" I probed.

"No," she replied, her voice dropping back to a whisper.

I stood there watching her silently, waiting for her to expand. There was a 'but' in there somewhere, a catch, and I didn't like the sound of it.

"It's not that he won't agree Dave," she carried on at last, still in little more than a whisper. "It's just that if you're taking something away from him, then he feels that you ought to give something back."

"Something back!" I exploded. "What the hell have I got that he would want. From what you've just said he's rich."

"He doesn't want money Dave."

"Then what does he want?" I hurled back at her. "The house? My car? I tell you what; he can have my old tennis racquet, damn him. Would that make him happy?"

"No honey," Eve answered, looking up at me with tears in her eyes. "He wants me."

----------------

----------------

I don't remember a lot about the murder trial, at least not a lot of the detail.

There were expert witnesses and character witnesses, people from the church and people from the hospital. It didn't last long. It doesn't when the plaintiff pleads guilty. No need for a jury to decide and no need for long drawn out arguments. No need for a lot of things and thankfully only limited interest from the press.

It was more a matter of the good and worthy Judge deciding on an appropriate sentence, taking, of course, all the mitigating circumstances into consideration.

A lesser plea than first degree murder had been offered and accepted, and a two year sentence awarded. Not much for taking a man's life.

The most difficult bit was taking leave of Eve at the end of the trial as the warders split us up, even as we were saying our goodbyes. The split with young Sam was even worse, and heartbreaking for us all as she cried her eyes out.

I vowed there and then, that when this nightmare was over, Eve and I would start all over again, everything that had happened being water under the bridge.

But as the pair of us stood there outside that prison eighteen months later, could I do it? Could she?

------------------

------------------

When my wife made her announcement about her ex lover's demands, I couldn't take it in at first. I imagined that she meant that he wanted her to run off back to Kenya with her, but that wasn't it at all. He was due to be in the UK for about another ten days, and he wanted female company. He didn't just want any female company; he wanted Eve. He wanted her to stay with him every day and every night till he left.

He wanted her to be his woman, his girl, his slut, his fuck-buddy, and he expected us to agree. He wasn't fussed whether Sam went to see him or not, and had offered to sign the adoption papers and never see her again.

So much for his fatherly interest.

I was stunned speechless, the pressure in my chest rising to breaking point as my anger reached boiling point.

"I hope you told him to get lost," I growled when I recovered the power of speech.

"I told him I'd talk to you Dave," Eve answered, cowering before me. "He's a difficult man to just say no to. There's something about him. Some kind of power. When I'm here with you then I hate him, but when I'm with him then I just sort of lose it. I lose the ability to think straight."

"Then give me his phone number and I'll ring him," I yelled at her. "I'll tell him where he can stick his damn permission."

"Hang on Dave," Eve cautioned me. "He warned me what he would do if we didn't agree."

"What he could do," I scoffed. "This is England, not bloody Kenya. What can he do except make the adoption more difficult."

"He told me he'd start to demand visitation rights for Sam," Eve went on, the tears pouring down her cheeks by then. "He's her father and been paying maintenance all these years Dave. I'm terrified the courts would grant his wishes."

"Maybe they wouldn't though," I tried to reason.

"Worse than that Dave, she went on, fighting to hold the tears back. "He said he'd insist on taking her back to Kenya to visit his family."

"I'm not sure the courts would agree to that Eve," I tried to placate her, having no real idea of the reality of the situation.

"But if they did Dave," she wailed. "He could take her and never bring her back, and then what would we do? You hear of terrible things like this happening. I might never see my daughter again Dave."

I took her in my arms and cuddled her up tightly, trying to make it all better, but having no real idea how to.

I should just kill the bastard, I muttered silently to myself. I didn't mean it of course, and simply wouldn't have it in me to go through with it.

That, at least, is what I thought at the time!

-------------------

-------------------

I well remember that first visit, just one week after the court case and the sentencing. Sitting there staring at Eve, staring at my wife as she sat there the other side of that grim table that separated us. Not knowing what to say, though there was so much to say. Way too much I suppose and no easy way to express it. Not at least when there were prison warders stood there listening to every word spoken.

We'd agreed that Sam would be left at home and not exposed to the horrors of prison at her tender age. Maybe later when we could explain the truth, or some version of it, and she'd be old enough to perhaps understand it.

Meanwhile, it was some bodged up excuse that one of us had to go away for a while. She wasn't happy but on a day to day basis, managed to live with it, and Eve's parents again proved to be a blessing. Not sure whether we did the right thing or not, but how do you deal with a situation so way beyond my capability to comprehend, never mind a three year old?

--------------------

--------------------

Given a choice between the risk of losing her daughter or her husband, I accept must have been an impossible decision. We tried to discuss it, but whenever we tried Eve ended up bursting into tears. Discussion became impossible and of course time was of the essence, with the supercilious bastard putting pressure on her.

Two days after the catastrophic news, I met with a solicitor. I didn't know him well, but he'd handled my divorce a few years previously and he'd seemed to know his business. He was wary of being too specific when he realised that Sam and I had no legal connection, but changed his attitude when I explained what Joshua was demanding.

"That sounds like blackmail to me Mr Lyon," he growled, glaring at me over the top of his glasses. "I don't know about back in Africa, but that's a serious offence here."

"So we've got him then," I cried out in relief. "We can get him arrested."

"Not that straightforward I'm afraid," He bought me back to earth with. "I'll have to consult with one of my colleagues, and perhaps speak to a judge I know. You say your wife is pregnant, so that could maybe help."

"Great! Fine! Can we ring them now," I encouraged him, but was told in no uncertain terms that I'd have to be patient; that I should go home to my wife and tell her to hang on and be brave, and to call him the next day for more news.

It was with a much lighter heart that I drove home that afternoon, eager to tell Eve what I had found out.

"Eve, Eve," I called out, entering my house, surprised to find Eve's mother there.

"Hi Mum," I greeted her happily. "What are you doing here? It's not one of your days."

"No problem Dave. Eve had to go out somewhere urgently, and asked me to pop over and look after Sam."

"Did she say where she was going?" I asked apprehensively.

"Something about an old friend from Kenya," Mum told me in all innocence. "She didn't say who."

"Joshua," I grunted, my worst fears probably confirmed.

"Joshua!" Mum cried out in surprise. "He's not back here again, is he?"

"Yes that Joshua," I confirmed. "He's over here on some money raising trip."

"This is bad Dave," she whispered unhappily. "Has she told you much about him?"

"Not much. Only that he's Sam's father of course, and a preacher or something."

"We only met him the once and we didn't take to him at all," she went on. "He came over here a couple of years ago and I've never met anyone so arrogant. We couldn't see how she could have put up with him Dave, but he seemed to have some sort of hold over her. We warned her, but she wouldn't listen. He used her. He wasn't interested in little Sam and hardly came to see her."

"So what sort of hold did he have over Eve?"

"I hardly like to say."

""I need to know Mum,' I insisted. "I really need to know."

"We thought it was sexual in some way," Mum mumbled, so quietly, that I only just caught it. "He used her Dave. We tried to get her to see sense, but she was besotted with him. He got her pregnant and abandoned her, then when he turned up out of the blue she went running to him."

"And it's happening again," I growled.

" Oh I hope not Dave," Mum sobbed. "Not now she's got you. She loves you Dave. I know it for a fact."

----------------------

It took some time but I eventually persuaded Mum to go back home, and I sat there miserable as sin, waiting for my wife to come home, not knowing what to expect. It was early evening when I heard her car pull up outside, and a good twenty minutes before I heard the door behind me open. Turning around, I took one look at her and knew that I was too late. She looked perfectly normal with not a hair out of place, dressed quite simply in jeans and a tee shirt. She was quite beautiful, but the look in her eyes left me in no doubt.

"Well?" I croaked, trying to keep my emotions in check.

"I'm sorry Dave," Eve replied quietly. "I just couldn't risk losing Sam, could I?"

"So you let him fuck you then" I stated, keeping my temper in check.

"I had to," she whispered.

"Like you did the last time he came over," I accused her.

"How the hell do you......" she shot back a look of surprise on her face. Shutting up suddenly as it dawned on her that I must have spoken to her mother.

"So why didn't you tell me that little fact Eve?"

"It's not the same Dave," she defended herself. "I didn't even know you then."

"And you don't think it's relevant to our present situation?"

"Doesn't matter now, does it?" She said as she started to cry. "What's done is done."

"So that's it is it," I growled at her. "You've done it. It's finished."

"No Dave," she whimpered unhappily. "I've come back for my things. He wants me back at his hotel as soon as possible."

"To sleep with him?"

"Yes," my wife admitted in a whisper.

"To fuck you?"

"Yes," she repeated even more quietly.

"No!"

"I've got to Dave," she pleaded with me, tears streaming down her cheeks. "He's threatened to take Sam. He says he'll take her back to Kenya with him when he leaves."

I argued with her, pleaded even, and told her I'd been to see a solicitor. But she wouldn't have any of it, screaming at me that I didn't understand and that I didn't care. At some stage I seemed to forget that my wife had been with another man, so desperate to prevent her from going back to the bastard.

But all to no avail!

Within the hour, she'd packed her bag, said goodnight to young Sam, and was ready to leave to go back to him. Eve came up to me to take me in her arms to give a farewell kiss, but I turned my cheek and simply stood there stiffly.

"It's going to be like that, is it?" she demanded, breaking away from me.

"Worse!" I spat back at her.

"Fuck you Dave," she spat back. "Why can't you understand?"

"All I understand is that you can't wait to get back to that African devil and into bed with him." I shouted at her.

That silenced her.

The look that she gave me I couldn't fathom, and to this day I'm not sure that I ever want to. Was it a look of frustration, of being misunderstood or simply of confusion? Or was it the realisation that what I'd accused her of was the truth?

Without another word, Eve turned on her heels and walked slowly out of the house, leaving me stood there trying to hold the tears back, as I pondered whether I'd still be there when she came back.

I didn't have long to ponder!

"Daddy," I heard a plaintiff little voice behind me. "Where has mummy gone?"

Oh shit!

Oh shit and damn it.

----------------

I slept that night on the couch with young Sam cuddled up in my arms, surprised that eventually I fell into a deep sleep, maybe dreaming, but only to wake up to my nightmare.

Why hadn't I stopped her? Physically restrained her? Maybe I'd recognised that it was already too late.

Why didn't I take young Sam over to Eve's Mum and dump her there and disappear off into the blue yonder?

But how could I do that to Sam?

How could I do that to the growing child in Eve's womb?

Damn it! I had to admit it. How could I do that to the woman I still loved beyond reason?

--------------------

The next two days were a blur as I tried, unsuccessfully to keep the truth from Eve's mum and dad, and fought to make Sam understand why her mother wasn't there. Sure, Eve rang both days, several times in fact, but I couldn't bring myself to speak to her, passing the phone over to Sam without a word, despite her pleas for me to talk to her.

Then the third day it all fell apart in the worst way imaginable.

"Mr Lyon?" I heard as I picked the phone up, and the official tone of the voice sending shivers through me.

"Your wife is Mrs Eve Lyon?" that awful voice went on when I confirmed his first question.

"Yes," I croaked, knowing that something terrible must have happened.

"I'm sorry sir," the voice went on. "But I'm afraid your wife has been admitted to hospital."

"What's wrong with her?"

"I'm not at liberty to say sir," my tormentor carried on. "It's not life threatening, but I suggest you make arrangements to visit her."

Details were exchanged, though I was in a daze. I rang Eve's mum to look after Sam, but in the end we, all four of us, bundled ourselves into my car and made our way unhappily to the hospital the other side of town.