Out of Body Experience

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"This fits me even better than I thought it did," she hummed.

I was incredulous that she was still thinking about her fucking outfit. "Can we- can we not obsess over clothes right now?" I grumped.

"For a dream, you sure are whiney," she teased.

"A dream? This isn't a dream, Tara!"

"Whatever it is, you need to re-lax..." It was so bizarre hearing my voice talk with such unconcerned confidence. Even during all of this! I mean, everything was still sort of slow and floaty... but I knew at my core that this was fucked up. That it wasn't right.

"We need to get back to normal," I said defensively. We were facing each other now.

She placed her hands on my shoulders, and I felt a squeezing sensation in my hands. "Mary," she said flatly. Her arms suddenly rose up and her palms were on my cheeks, like she was holding my face still to look straight in my eyes. I could feel the hotness of Tara's face in my own hands...

I just stood there, compliant. "What?"

She gazed at me harshly, but her firm grip started to soften, and her thumbs began to run in little circles. "Your hands are really soft," her expression suddenly lightened. She slid her right hand up and into my hair, and her left down along my neck. Gently exploring.

"Tara, this is... don't you feel weird about this...?" I stammered.

She smiled—to herself! Her eyes weren't even focused on mine; she was just roaming over my body. Her body. "Definitely. I can feel exactly how I should be touched."

IV

The way she said it really unnerved me. It's like she didn't even see me in her body anymore. Like I wasn't even there at all. I didn't know how I could even respond to that. I just blinked dumbly. Feeling her feeling me. Or—me feeling her. Whatever.

I tried to step away, but she effortlessly slid behind me. Her arms wrapped around my stomach. Her chest slowly pressing into my back. So fucking confusing. I was holding myself in place. She pulled her hands tighter against my stomach, running them back and forth along my shirt. Her head moved in, over my shoulder, and inhaled. I was overwhelmed by the sudden sensation of her perfume and skin filling my nostrils.

"What are you—why...?"

"I wonder if Jake knows what he's missing," she mumbled into my neck.

I knew what was going on. It seemed like I should tense my shoulders but—that's not the part I felt, you know? Do you get this at all? I felt paralyzed. I was just being pulled along, like a puppet.

I gasped as I felt skin press against my lips. She was kissing my neck. "Tara!" I croaked.

She just held on tighter. And did it again, sighing into my body. She paused for a moment, "Fuck that feels cool."

And she kissed again, not really taking her mouth away from the skin anymore. She was- she was necking me! I've never done that to anyone before... let alone on a girl! "Tara, stop..."

"Mmm... This is what I like. I wish I could just make other people do this," she purred to herself.

"I- I don't like it."

Her arms still held me in place, but her hands dipped down to the edge of the shirt, then began to slip back up. Underneath it. I could feel her tummy. She was softly walking her fingers around my navel, and she kinda giggled and sighed at the same time. "God this is amazing..."

"N-not for me," I pleaded.

"Settle down," she admonished, annoyed at being interrupted. "Enjoy this."

"It doesn't... It's not the same for me..."

"You can touch me too, if you want."

"I don't... I'm not a- a lesbian."

"You're not anything," she said bitingly.

I didn't know what to say. I was so taken aback. The silence encouraged her to resume her exploration of- uh, our body. She was breathing in against my shoulder, lightly nibbling her teeth along the skin. Her fingers creeping up my abdomen, pulling the shirt up, curiously grazing my bra.

I was standing there. Doing nothing. And yet I was feeling Tara's body up. What could I do? I resolved to finally get out of this submissive position. I brought my arms up, which pushed at hers in the process. She resisted at first, but suddenly cooperated. I realized, a half-second too late, that she was bringing her arms up too, with the rest of the shirt. Before I knew it, she deftly managed to push my hands up in the air and pull the fabric over my face.

It happened so effortlessly. My mind couldn't keep up with what I was seeing, what I was controlling, and what I was feeling. How was Tara able to handle it so much better? And even still. I watched the shirt fall to the floor. I looked down at myself, seeing Tara's breasts resting in a white bra. And her perfect, smooth stomach. I didn't feel any different. My body still had a shirt on. I couldn't tell whether to feel exposed or not.

Her hands traced along the sides of my torso, gliding down along the smooth dip in my waist. I took a step away from her, which was toward the foot of the bed, and turned around. "This is- that's far enough."

I watched Tara make my body look me up and down, intent look in the eyes. Impressed. Satisfied.

"I don't think so. This is like, a once-in-a-lifetime chance."

My mouth hung open. "You can't be... I mean, we don't even know what's- what's going on!" I protested.

She moved forward, right in front of me. I could feel my breath on... me. "This could be good for you," she said low.

"Wha--?"

I couldn't even make the T. She lunged her neck forward, quickly grabbing my head with her hands, and kissed me on the mouth. I could taste her fruity lip gloss. I hadn't kissed anyone in a long time. Especially not like this. Well, not ever like this. I felt my lips as the aggressive sensation. I felt like I was pushing into another mouth. Forceful. Confident. But... kissing feminine lips.

She ended the embrace and took a breath. "Wow," she murmured.

I just gawked at her. My mind went blank.

"I've never been kissed by a girl," she smirked. "What a way to do it."

"I..."

"And now you've kissed a girl," her eyes glinted.

"Not really- I mean- you... you made me--"

"I think I'm going to make you do more," she blurted out.

"More?" I croaked, "No!"

Her hands fell on top of my shoulders, and she tilted her head to the side a little. "Yes," she responded assuredly, "I think so." I felt a pressure against my fingers—pushing. And I fell backward onto the bed.

"Tara!" I yelped, scooting backward away from her. It was a stupid move. It only served to get my entire body onto the sheets, and she crawled up the mattress after me, hovering over me.

I had never seen such a look of determination in my own eyes before. "So this is what I look like on my back," she said, straddling my hips.

Her fingers went to my arms, and traced all the way down to my hands, then slipped over to my stomach and raked upward. She made a little giggle, and bit her lip. And that's what I felt. Sensations in my fingertips. A body pinned beneath me. A pinch on my mouth. When her hands reached my bra, I felt again like I needed to stop this.

I slowly grabbed at her wrists, trying to act calm. But she immediately had my arms in her hands, and was pulling them above my head. Pinning them above me. She leaned over, put her mouth over my ear, and breathed, "Stop struggling and let me enjoy this."

I felt my mouth filled with warm skin. She was kissing my earlobe, and then running the tip of her tongue down along my jaw. My mind turned. Is this how she is with boys? Is this what she likes done to her? Was she just using my body to explore herself? I wondered how far she was willing to go.

Her feminine scent filled my nostrils. Such soft skin against my hands, cheek, lips. I didn't admit it to myself yet, but I knew what she wanted. What she was going to make me do. And there was nothing I could do about it. I was going to become her toy, whether I wanted to or not. The word 'rape' floated in my head for a moment, but I couldn't attach the meaning to an appropriate context. Not with what was happening.

And besides. I have to be honest. I was becoming increasingly curious to experience her movements. I mean, I didn't like it. But I was feeling inexorably drawn to how she treated her body. I could feel everything she did. What it was like to be a confident lover. Wasn't this what I wanted? I wanted to feel freedom, but this was so fucked up.

I blinked and refocused my eyes, realizing I was just sort of staring at the ceiling blankly; feeling whatever Tara was making me feel. I had grown limp on the bed, completely unresisting. Tilting my chin down, I saw her unsnapping the front of my bra. I knew I was about to taste her breasts.

V

The cups were pushed away, each to the side of my chest. She looked down with a little bit of wonder. Her hands moved to my stomach and were slowly guided up, almost ceremoniously, until brushing underneath my breasts. I just laid there. Sensing soft skin gliding under my hands. Then my palms filled with her—

The room was filled with a gasp. She moved her thumbs over my nipples. Little hard protrusions pulled against my fingertips. I felt her biting her lip again, and a tiny surprised yelp escaped my lips. Her eyes widened at the sound, and I think she got mixed-up. Like I was making the sound because of how she was touching my breasts.

She lowered herself down, sliding her legs straight behind herself, resting half of her body on top of mine. Her head lining up with my chest. Leaning over still and... Soft skin against my lips. She was kissing around my areolas. Her fingers curled into my skin, grasping in response to her own caresses. I could feel her slipping the tip of her tongue out from her lips, tracing around my nipple.

I watched her in awe. My jaw was slack, mouth hanging open. And yet I felt my lips closing, my tongue curling, all coming together in a gentle sucking. She made a soft moan into my skin. I could only begin to imagine what it was like for her. And it wasn't like I didn't know she was into this. Being treated this way, I mean. She's told me as much before but... Now she was doing it to herself. I was doing it to her. I could taste it.

My head dropped back to the pillow. I couldn't watch anymore. My mind felt so damn heavy. Seeing my own body, my own face... So engaged in this... whatever the hell it was. I shut my eyes, thinking again that this must be the most vivid dream of my life. A sudden rush of cool air entered my mouth, and I realized that she pulled off of my breast, took a breath in, and was moving over to the other.

And then the sucking again. Gentle, controlled, but firm. I tried to think if I would like that done to me. She kept humming into my skin, like she was surprised how good it felt every few seconds. I guess it made sense though. Like, I was the one lying on my back, but if felt like I was on my side, leaning on another body. I would get used to it, and then forget, and then suddenly remember everything was backwards.

Her hand moved down to my side, quietly tracing down to my waist, then creeping along my pelvis. She giggled again, and specifically tickled underneath my bellybutton. Her mouth was still around my nipple, and I could tell she was gently biting and laughing at the same time.

My jaw moved to say something, but I kept silent. Part of me asking, what was the point? But... Honestly? I think I was, um, actually getting into it. I mean, not getting off or anything like that. But feeling all these new sensations. Of what it is like to be an assertive, care-free lover. The more I let myself relax, the more susceptible I became to experiencing it. Letting myself know what it's like. And I don't know. I don't know if I was expecting what happened next, anticipating it... or if I really was startled.

She began to dig her fingers underneath the waist of my skirt. Pushing downward, across soft skin that made her shudder. Then further still. I swallowed hard, and was probably blushing, as I realized she was shaved. My body would have been trembling—if I was in control of it. My own hands... Tara's hands anyway, reflexively clutched into the sheets. Anticipation.

I felt it on my ring and middle fingers. It was warmer. More pliable. Wet.

She explored the top of my slit, very tentatively. Her head was resting on my chest now, looking down toward the foot of the bed. No more kissing or suckling. Just two fingertips gently probing. And her sighs. I think I may have been holding my breath.

A sensation of pressing harder. And in little circles. It was so bizarre to hear her moan. I was always so quiet when I... indulged myself. But there was my voice. Unashamed sounds of pleasure slipping out. And then—

"Open your legs a little," she panted.

I didn't move. Almost didn't register the request. I felt the back of my hand scraping against the waist of the skirt, pinned between pulling fabric and skin. Her head tilted up and turned. She looked me in the eye. "Mary..."

I just looked back at her. I had nothing to say. Nothing I could say.

"Mary," she repeated, "I need it." Her body pulled up along mine a little, repositioning so our faces were close. She slid her hand out of my skirt, and we both breathed deeply. "I need to feel..."

She leaned closer still. My head was pressed into the pillows. Maybe I could have turned my face away, but our stare was locked. And then after this pause, she closed her eyes languidly, and repeated, "I need to feel me..."

And she kissed me. It wasn't nearly as shocking this time. Tasting a girl on my lips again. Actually, now that she was lying down with me... I was more relaxed. Tranquil, in a way. Like I had surrendered to the situation so much more already.

Her hand ran down along my skirt, and started to pull it up from the bottom. She broke the kiss, only for a moment, to whisper, "Help me..." A tiny breath later, her lips were on mine again.

I knew what she meant. Somehow it was just clear to me. My legs had been lying flat on the mattress; I pulled them up, so my feet were still flat, but my knees were in the air. It gave her much easier access to pull the skirt back. I was letting her have easier access. Fuck. I didn't realize it until right then, but I was kissing her back.

I wasn't me anymore. I had to just let go. Whatever this experience was, I was giving into it. Her self-confidence. Knowing exactly what she wanted. Her bravery. Her touching... It was so fluid. So sensual. How could I not be impressed? And in the fuzziness of it all, I was losing the distinction between who she was and what I thought I needed to be.

I wrapped my arms around her back, and felt the sensation of being pulled. Hugged. She slithered her fingers underneath my panties and began to tease again. The vibrations of her pleased moans hummed between our mouths. I could tell that she... I... was already a lot more wet than before. My fingers felt slippery. She wrapped a leg over one of mine, and pushed her pelvis down on my thigh. I felt the sensation between my own legs, and my heart jumped.

Did she realize I could feel it? Before I knew it, she was grinding herself against me even harder. I squeezed my arms around her tighter, instinctively encouraging her. In retrospect, she was probably humping my leg out of the same base response. She was fingering herself basically... All that stimulation. Of course she would think to thrust her hips.

And now because of her movements... so was I.

VI

Our bodies were sort of rolling together in union. Me pressing myself into her hand, because she was pressing herself into my leg. Every few moments, I knew she got a special jolt of pleasure. I knew it because I could feel it in the way she made my body shudder. A sudden hard plunge against my slit. A brief pause in the effort of my fingers.

It made my breath catch. And it made me moan. We weren't kissing anymore. Our foreheads were pressed against each others, our eyes closed. Heavy panting between us, hot air on our faces. I don't know how long this went on. It couldn't have been too much time but... I mean, how could I know? Everything felt slower in the first place. Like I was high. According to Tara, anyway.

I was just there. Feeling. Experiencing. Sensual arousal. Even beads of sweat... although I couldn't tell you if they were hers or mine. She broke my reverie.

"Sh-shit... I'm fucking- god! I need to come!" she pouted in my voice. For a split second, I wondered if I was the one who actually said it.

I opened my eyes, and saw me staring back. Such a fiery desperation. I had never seen such a mix of determination and need mixed in. Her body was still now, and I couldn't help feeling a twinge of irritation that she wasn't rubbing against my leg anymore. God, what was happening to me? I felt so damn hot down there.

She pulled her body up, resting on her heels. I actually sulked—sulked!— "Where are you going!?"

She scooted backwards on the bed a little bit. Her chest was rising in heavy breaths, and I suddenly realized how good it would feel to have cool air rushing across my chest, my nipples. I wanted to tell her to take off her shirt...

"I... I need to... Fuck, Mary. I'm going to- I have to..."

My mind tripped over itself. Tara stuttering? She could always find the words. But my voice—it sounded like me... But god damn it, I knew what I wanted. I needed her to keep rubbing, keep stimulating, keep making me feel good.

Her eyes dropped down between my legs. She inhaled deeply, and began to lean down. I jerked my head up to watch in... Jesus, I don't know. I just couldn't look away. I had to see it happen. Fabric on my fingertips. She was pulling my panties to the side, moving closer. My nostrils became overwhelmingly filled with the scent of sex. My god, I was smelling her... her...

It only took two tentative licks. I could feel the tip of my tongue very carefully probe against hot wetness. She inhaled sharply, I'm sure from the feeling of a tongue on her pussy. It was me that drew in an even deeper sense of arousal. In my nose—barely any time to think about it—and then my mouth was filled up. She wrapped her lips around me, kissing, lapping her tongue deeply. My head dropped back into the pillow in shock. I was tasting it. All of it. I was so bowled over that I didn't even hear her moaning between my legs.

She clutched her fingers into my hips, and sucked on my clit, making high-pitched squeals into me. I was biting my own lip, but all I could feel was my mouth drenched in wetness. My tongue swirling inside of a girl. And this confused me. Again, I mistook our bodies... I assumed the dripping between my legs was because of her oral ministrations but—fuck. No. It was between my legs. My body's legs. I was turned on, and I wasn't getting any attention anymore.

"Tara..." I whispered.

She ignored me, focusing on what she was doing. Fucking eating herself out.

"Tara," I repeated louder.

Nothing but a dismissive, lusty moan.

I reached down and grabbed her hair, surprising myself by angrily pulling it back. I felt the pain in my own scalp, but I didn't give a shit. She hissed in some air, and croaked out, "Fuck! W-what? I'm- I'm close!"

Selfish bitch.

"Me too," I growled.

She tried to bring her head back down, but I held firm. The ache pulling behind my ears. "Mary—let me..."

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