Parent-Teacher Conference Ch. 06byNymphWriter©
The Forgotten Memories
I saw myself as a small girl, playing with my friend Mandy at the beach. It was like I was watching my life on a television screen or a movie. I suddenly remembered this event. I was five and it was my first trip to the beach. The scene changed and I was in elementary school, playing hopscotch with some other kids, when a girl comes up and knocks me down causing me to skin my knee. I start crying and holding my knee. Then it was the summer I learned to swim and I saw Mandy, by my side and encouraging me to try. Now I start to wonder why we aren't friends any more. I can see how close we were.
The scene morphs again and I was in middle school now. Mandy and I are walking to class when suddenly there are three large girls standing in front of us. Why did they hate us so much? I never understood this. Another change and I'm crying. Why don't I recognize this scene from my life, and why am I crying. I'm sitting on a sofa, in a house that isn't mine. My mom walks up and hands me a glass of juice and a tissue. All around me people are wearing black and crying. A funeral, this is a funeral. But who's funeral? And where's Mandy? Why wouldn't she be here for this... unless... suddenly I see the picture of Mandy with the wreath around it. 'What? How? MANDY?!?'
There was another change, but this is before the funeral, because I see Mandy. We're fighting. I have no idea why but it seems stupid. She drove away in the car and I was yelling at her, calling her mean names. 'Why? Why am I so angry?'
The light turns green; she enters the intersection and WHAM! The truck comes out of nowhere and slams into her car. The truck driver who was too cheap to fix his brakes so he could buy a bottle vodka. He was driving too fast because he wanted to drink that open bottle at home. Instead, he slammed into the driver's side of Mandy's car. I ran to her. Her mangled body was covered in blood. She gasped for air. I put my arms around her the best that I could.
"Mandy! Oh God! Mandy! NO!" I screamed.
"Alexis," she gasped.
"Shhhh!" I said, "Help is coming. Save your strength."
"Alexis," she gasped. "I... I... I'm... s-s-s-sorry."
"No Mandy," I sobbed, trying to be strong. "I'm sorry. Please Mandy, please forgive me. I don't even like Jimmy that much. Oh Mandy!"
"A-lex-sis," she whispered, and then died in my arms.
Suddenly, I remembered this moment. We had just gotten our licenses a few weeks before, and we were fighting about... about... Jimmy... yes... Jimmy Peterson. We both had a crush on him but he liked Mandy more than me, and my stupid, teenage girl feelings were hurt. I stood there, on the curb, watching in horror. I was supposed to be in that car with her. She was giving me a ride home when she told me Jimmy kissed her, and asked her to be his girlfriend. I was furious with her and we started fighting. She pulled over and we continued arguing until I got out of her car, slamming the door and I told her... oh god... I told her that I wished she were dead.
"Fuck-off Alexis!" Mandy screamed at me. "I thought you were my friend!"
"Me?!?" I yelled back. "You knew I liked Jimmy and you took him from me!"
"Alexis! I'm sorry!" yelled Mandy with tears in her eyes. "Please forgive me!"
"We are finished Mandy!" I screamed.
"FINE!" she screamed back and drove off.
'Oh god! It was my fault! Mandy's death... it's my fault.' I began to weep.
Now, it's my graduation day. There are my parents, and Mandy's parents. They all hug me and Mandy's parents don't hate me? No. Wait, oh now I remember I told them what happened and they still forgave me. They forgave me so I'd stop hating myself and live. It was Mandy who wanted to be a teacher, not me, but I promised to be the teacher she couldn't be.
Yet another change, college, my college boyfriend, Rodger, we were in his dorm room, kissing, touching, 'Oh my God,' and I realize, it's the night, that night, the night he took a scared 19 year old girl and made her a woman. He started off slowly kissing and touching. I knew I wasn't his first, but after almost a year of dating, it was time for me to give him what no man before had had, my virginity. I was so scared and he was so gentle. I remembered how he planned the whole night, a nice dinner at our favorite place, a long walk across campus, then his room, candles, soft music, and roses. Yeah, it was pretty cliché, but it was so romantic. He had been so patient with me, never made me feel bad for saying no when I did. I knew tonight was all about me.
His kisses were so soft, gentle, passionate, loving. I was sure we were going to get married after graduation. He unbuttoned my blouse so slowly, kissing my lips, my face, down my neck as my blouse fell to the floor. I was so scared, but he was so gentle, patient, and slow. Soon, my bra was gone and he was suckling my breasts, caressing them, loving them and me. I pulled off his shirt and rubbed his back. Over the year, prior to this moment, we had touched and kissed, but never anything below the belt, and tonight, I would finally see him naked. It was silly how curious I was about how his penis would look. The only ones I had seen before were either in biology books, or the "Playgirl" Mandy had stolen from her mother with Harrison Ford on the cover. Rodger never forced himself on me, never rushed, and this night was planned carefully. His roommate was visiting his folks for the weekend, and no one cared if a guy brought a girl to his room.
My pants came off slowly. He could feel my nervousness, but he didn't stop. He kissed my hips, the outside of my panties, and my thighs. I was so wet and I knew he was the cause. Slowly, he removed my soaked panties and looked at me, lying there naked on his bed. The lust in his eyes told me he liked what he saw, as did the wicked smile that grew on his face. His first kiss to my sex sent electricity through my body and I nearly climaxed right there. I gasped and moaned as he licked me, probed the inside of my sex with his tongue, and sucked my clit. It didn't take long for my first orgasm of the night to strike with a force that I had never experienced before. My body convulsed and shook violently while he worked me.
"Are you ready?" he asked.
"Yes!" I yelled without fear or hesitation.
Rodger sat up and slipped the condom on his penis. It looked so big, the veins budging out, and I was sure he was going to split me in half with that thing. The sound of the foil packet tearing open added to both my excitement and nervousness. 'How is that tiny thing going to fit over his huge erection?' I thought. Somehow, that tiny condom rolled over him with ease, and he crawled up my body and slowly entered me. I felt the latex of the condom and how perfectly it fit around his penis, and he gave me time to adjust to him, before pushing in further. Then, came the tearing of my hymen. Damn that hurt. I cried out in pain.
Rodger kissed me. "I promise it will only hurt for a moment, baby, but I will feel better when you climax with me in you."
"All right," I sobbed, still reacting to the incredible pain I had just felt.
Oh how right he was though. He moved so slowly, so carefully, filling me, giving me time to stretch and adjust. I don't remember how long that first session lasted, but I do remember the magic. When my second orgasm hit, it was bigger and strong than the first and Rodger climaxed with me.
We made love three times that night and I was sore and achy the next day. Rodger and I dated for another six months, but then, like so many college relationships, we realized that we were not in love, and even though the sex was great, it wasn't enough to sustain a lasting relationship. We parted as friends, and the last time I saw him, he was engaged to a woman and moved to New York.
Everything blurs again, I saw... another funeral? I was sitting alone, but I was in a room with people I'd never met. A plane crash. My parents and Mandy's parents were flying back when their plane crashed, leaving no survivors. These were friends of my parents and Mandy's parents. I'm alone. I'm an orphan now. Everyone I have ever loved has died.
Another change and I was teaching my first class. I remembered those kids. We were reading "Dogzilla" that week. It was the class favorite and I was so happy. Then I started reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and the kids were watching me read to them. This is why Mandy wanted to be a teacher, and I was glad I chose to follow her path. Music. I hear Journey's "Faithfully" as someone touched my back. I jumped and I see a pair of light brown eyes, like creamy caramel, looking up at me and lips that mouth, "Sorry."
I took the ear buds from my ears and asked, "Are you Mr. Stone?"
'The day I met Oliver! Oh yes!' He hands me the paper and the stapler I dropped, helps me down from the stepladder. Then we were in the parking lot talking. Then we were in the restaurant, talking, eating, laughing, kissing, and making love. It wasn't just sex, it was so much more. The scene changes again and we were walking together through town. This was the real memory, I was sure of it. Another change, and I was talking to the real Mrs. Stone about her son, and sitting next to my left hand is the note and the rose from Oliver.
Another change and I was at the middle school, and I was sitting at my desk by the window I hear the "PING" and I see the message. Suddenly I know what was going to happen. I wanted to warn myself, but I know it's just a memory so I watch. Just as I hide the print out and fix my shirt, Fleck and Wyman step into my room. After a few moments of verbal banter, I see Wyman grab me, and Fleck sit in my chair. Only, this time, I noticed something I didn't remember. Wyman had something on the tip of his right index finger and when he grabbed me, it pierced my skin. Why didn't I remember that? I remembered my arms hurting after he left. I guess I was struggling too much to have noticed before. Fleck gets in my face when he can't find anything and they leave. Two more e-mails and a change.
I was at my apartment talking with Oliver about what had happened earlier. Then I was back in the restaurant... why? The last time I went back in time with my memories was Mandy's' death. But this scene is wrong. Oliver didn't bend me over the table, I sat... oh wait... this is my nightmare. Oh god! There's Fleck... grabbing me... choking me... he's going to rape me... NO! I woke up and was scared. Back to my classroom and my punching Fleck after he slapped me. Dean Wilson did save my life at that moment, she fades away and I'm standing in my apartment. I looked around to see what was wrong. There was the floor safe and the text message. I made coffee. There was Wyman, and right on cue, Fleck steps out... he hit me... choked me... pinned me to the island... this time it's not a dream... not a nightmare... it's real. He began to unbutton the top button of my jeans. I lift my head. WHAM! I was blind, but I heard voices. Oliver, Fleck. Fleck held me up, making me stand. I'd had it! This bastard could rape a corpse for all I care, but I was done! I felt my head smash his nose, I bit what I thought was his hand, my knees made contact. Only, what I felt... wasn't normal. It was almost like, he had two penises... maybe it was just the fabric of his pants. Escape. I felt must escape. I must breathe. Another kick. I was blind and I followed the hard top of the island. I put my arms out to find the wall. Hands grab my shoulder. Panic. Fight. Escape.
"ALEXIS IT'S ME!"
Oliver! I can't talk! I can't breathe! I was going to die! 'Oh Oliver! I'm sorry I let you down!' I touched his hands. I knew that with him, I was safe. At least I will die in his arms. Then he asked about trust, and I heard the hissing, and his apology. I woke to find myself in a strange white room. Yes, I knew where I was at now. The alarms start to ring, the blue creature. Screaming. The green creature. Screaming. Oliver. OLIVER! Back on the bed, then down the hall. The room. The screen with my picture. Oliver's story. Then, I was back in the restaurant. 'Why am I here?' Yes, Oliver is showing me the magic of his ship. Oliver is sitting next to me, holding my hand. He was going ask me a question when, he looked sick, hurt. 'What is that pouring from his mouth? WYMAN?!? NO!!!' Fleck grabs me and they both tear off my clothes. 'NO!!!' I was pinned to the table. 'NO!!! I wasn't waking up, why? Where's Oliver? Dead? NO!!! Oliver help me! OLIVER!!! HELP ME!!! OLIVER!!!'
Oliver was holding me softly. I'd just vomited all over him and he was still holding me. The way a parent holds a child, the way a man holds his lover. His words were soothing. I am calm. I am safe. I am... in love. Yes, I am in love. I am in love with Oliver. I am in love with a prince. I am in love with Prince Oliver. Why doesn't he have me call him Prince Oliver? Oh wait, he said it was like a prince. He's not like me, and yet he is. I'm confused and haunted by these nightmares and Iman wants to run some tests to find out what else was wrong with me. I'm in the room, the white room that I first woke up in. The metal bands, they frighten me. I panicked. Oliver and Iman asked me to trust them. Oliver says he would return when this was finished. I hope it would finish soon, I missed him. I cannot reveal my feeling to him, not until I know if he feels the same way about me. 'Oh Oliver, pick me, choose me, love me.' Wait a minute, I've hear that before, that show, that show I love watching with the doctors and the title that sounds like a medical book. Wait, I'm being monitored. 'SHIT! Oliver will know. DAMN!! Why did I let that information become known? Everyone observing me will know.'
I heard a woman's voice calling my name. At first I thought it was my mom, but then I know it wasn't, it was Mandy. "Alexis, my old friend."
"Mandy? Am I dead?"
"No Alexis," said Mandy. "I'm here to let you know, you need to stop being angry with yourself."
"But if we hadn't fought-"
"You would have been in that car with me and you never would have met Oliver. It was my time to go, to die, but not yours. Oliver is your destiny, your soul mate. Just follow your heart Alexis. I forgave you in the car. That was what I was trying to tell you. You held me in those final seconds and never left my side. I know the paramedics had to pull you away screaming because you didn't want to leave me. Please know I never left your side either. And I never will."
As Mandy faded away, I heard another woman's voice calling my name. It was a soothing sound, reminding me of my mother. 'Mom, oh how I miss you.' Then, there she is, my mother. "Mom?"
"Alexis," she said, her voice sounded so ethereal. "Alexis my child. Don't be afraid any more. You're safe. You've done so much and you've made me so proud. Your father and I are always here with you, as is Mandy, and her parents. You are never alone, you never have been. Know that we are always here for you, that we love you, and you must trust your instincts."
"Alexis Perry." A familiar female voice from outside was calling me.
I reached for my mom but she was just out of my reach. "Mom! Don't leave me!"
"I never have Alexis, but our time is up," my mom said. "Just remember, I love you."
"Alexis Perry," says Iman.
My eyes popped open and I was back in the white room. "Doc?" I asked fighting tears.
"Rashad, please get... Ol-lee-ver for Alexis Perry," Iman commanded.
Rashad nodded and left the room. Iman turned to me and said, "I know this was traumatic on you, and we now know how they tracked you and why you are having those... those..."
"Nightmares," I said weakly.
"Yes," she continued. "We will need to schedule your surgery right away to remove the implant. And do not worry, I know how keep a secret," she winked, "and Rashad saw nothing as he was monitoring you physical responses to the memories."
Oliver entered the room, breathing hard as if he ran here. Rashad ran in behind him. "How is she?" he asked.
"Alexis Perry will be fine," began Iman. "It seems when she first encountered the one known as Wyman, he put an implant in the arm of Alexis Perry to monitor her. This also seems to be the cause of the... the..."
"Nightmares," I said.
"Yes, the night... mares," said Iman.
"Why did she vomit this morning?" asked Oliver as he walked over and held my hand.
"Trauma," said Iman. "In her... night... mare" I nodded, "she saw you killed by the one called Wyman. Then she sees the one called Fleck grab her and before long, she see herself attacked by these creatures in a brutal manner. It was rather frightening to witness. A lesser woman would have been driven mad by these images."
I shudder as she so coldly describes the nightmare, as if she were describing a piece of furniture. "You can help her can't you?" Oliver asked.
"I hope to," said Iman. "I can say if I had to see such images as she has seen, I would scream, cry, and vomit too. If I could, that is."
For the first time, Iman touches my cheek the way my mother would do when I was a child. Now she knew all my deep dark secrets, and yet, she wasn't sharing them to Oliver, I was starting to understand my mother's message. "Why did I see only some of my memories?" I asked.
"I am not sure Alexis Perry," said, Iman. "What I can tell is I know that there is something in your body I feel is causing your night... mares. Something I hope to remove if you will allow me."
"Yes, please," I said without hesitation.
Suddenly, Oliver started clicking at Iman, and she clicked back. The two of them began clicking back and forth to each other and from what I could tell, Oliver was not happy with her answers. Finally I got frustrated and yelled, "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TWO TALKING WITHOUT INCLUDING ME?!?"
They both stopped and Oliver looked down at me. "Alexis, I'm sorry. I just wanted to know something but the good doctor here won't answer my questions."
"The memories of Alexis Perry are not for me to share. Some were quite personal and it is not my place to repeat them. I saw more than I needed to in the interest of finding out the cause of her illness. I believe I have. If she wishes for you to share them, that is for her to decide, not me."
I was so impressed. "Thanks Doc," I said smiling weakly.
I could see the pain in Oliver's face as he said, "Fine."
"Oliver," I said. "Please know that some of what I saw were... well... rather personal and traumatic. Others were, well..." I could feel myself blushing. "Let's just say, those were one's I'd like to relive again."
Oliver looked at me confused for a moment, then smiled big and asked, "Like what?"
"Alexis Perry needs to have this surgery immediately and the longer we wait the greater the risk to her heath, I fear," commanded Iman.
I had to give her credit; Iman knew how to take control of a situation when necessary.
"Yes," said Oliver, "I understand. Alexis, please know I wouldn't trust anyone else with your health."
Oliver's words helped sooth me, even though the thought of surgery wasn't something I was thrilled with. "Okay Oliver," the whispered, "and red curtained restaurants to answer your question." I looked at Iman and said, "Let's get this over with Doc."
Oliver smiled really big, then squeezed my hand and quietly left the room. Iman turned to me and said, "I will do my best Alexis Perry. I think he has found..." her voice trailed off.
"It is not for me to say Alexis Perry. However, I have never seen him like this before. Now, I have a job to do. Are you ready?"
"As ready as I'll ever be," I lied, I wasn't ready.
"Good Alexis Perry," she said. "Now, please relax."
I laid my head back on the bed and shut my eyes. I felt a pinch in my arm, and then everything went black.
I was standing alone in a dark room. I looked around but no one was here. "Hello?" I called out.