Punky's Diary, 2/24/07

February 24, 2007

So here I am again and I just gotta say; weird shit just goes on happening to me.

Weird, but...nice.

See okay, I was at the Club again, doing the nude-band thing (I've actually learned like eight different chords on the guitar now, so I feel pretty cool about that), and we were playing and then doing our little show-stopper at the end, and everything was pretty normal actually.

Except as I'm standing on the bar sticking my leg and foot out and peeing down my thigh so it sorta runs down my leg and off my toe and into the patron's glass—something I saw in that movie From Noon Till Three and got practice doing with Allis—I look and here's this extreme cutie looking up at me with her eyes all huge and warm and this big grin on her face and well, it captivates me for a moment, ya know?

So she finally moves up in line and holds her little shot-glass under my toe and I'm filling it for her and she moves on, but as she does she gives me this real suggestive wink, and then goes to get her drink made by the bartendress.

So that part finishes and we march back over to the stage and finish the song and I happen to look over and that same darkish-haired cutie-pie is looking straight at me, holding up her glass and then drinking from it. She finishes the whole thing and then leans back against the wall, arms crossed, and watches me.

In spite of everything else (the least of which is that I'm stark naked playing rock music in front of 300 people or something), I get nervous! I mean, I've been playing this gig for a month or something, and having this tall woman checking me out has got me all frazzled!

So we end the show and go backstage and I'm getting dressed and I turn and there she is! One of the security guys is with her and then he turns and leaves and she just stands there outside the doorway, peeping in at me. I knew she was tall, but now I see she's like 5'10 or something—two inches taller than me! The other girls are all laughing and talking about the crowd and the music and everything, but it's like one of those moments out of a movie where time stops and there's like this zooming effect where this girl's face gets closer and the background moves backward.

Really trippy.

I've only got panties on so far, so I get my tee-shirt on and then my jeans and I sit and start putting my socks and shoes on. I'd already rinsed my pee-wet leg and foot off in the sink, but as I'm trying to get my socks right-side-out, here's this girl's big eyes looking right there—at the foot I'd used to serve her drink to her.

"Hiya baby-girl, wanna come in?" Ava asks her and she nods and steps into the room, says "Hi" to everyone, and then comes up and stands right in front of me.

"...I can still taste your flavor," she says. "And I love it..."

So that's one way to open a conversation I must say. The only thing I could think of to say was "Thanks" but it seemed enough for her.

An uncomfortable silence followed, and then conversation resumed with everyone else; when the girl had said what she said, the room had gone totally silent. That's when Allis popped her head in the door, and I could see Shay was right behind her trying to look in too.

"Punky!" she yelled, waving. "I'm going home with Shay tonight, okay?" I nod and wave back and when Shay is finally able to get far enough through the doorway to see me, I blow her a kiss and wave. Then they were both gone, but I at least had an idea who I might be spending the night with myself.

"Well, have a seat," I told my new fan, and she sat right beside me. I was still attempting to put my sock on so I could leave this backstage riot, but the girl was suddenly down on her knees in front of me and for just a second I was scared that she'd do something weird like lick my toes in front of everybody. Instead she took the sock out of my hands and started pushing it up my foot.

I just stared.

But then I was socked and shoed (like a horse?), and I got up, wished everyone else good-night and left the building with this tall, nameless wonder at my side.

"Charlie," she said her name was when I finally asked, and she was so beautiful, so feminine and so fuckable I found myself just staring again. I blinked, and she grinned.

"People stare, I know," she whispered. It seemed like a 'thing' with her, which is okay I guess.

"Well, you're just so..."

"Tall...I know." she answered.

"No," I said, and now we were walking to where the cars were. "You're like incredibly, stunningly, amazingly gorgeous, is why."

"Oh. Thanks. Really, I mean it."

Then we were at my car and it was time to pop the question or simply go home by myself. I decided to let her do the talking and see what happened.

"Well," she finally said when I stopped at my car. "I'm...I'd...I wouldn't...mind—I mean, I'd love to spend the night, if you don't mind or you don't have anything else you're doing, or...someone 'else' you're doing...."

"Okay now, that was funny," I said about that last part. She smiled at me and then got worried looking.

"...but, if you don't mind," she said soft, like she didn't want anyone else to hear—not that the sidewalk was exactly crowded at 3 in the morning. "I'm...wondering if it would be okay if we slept together."

"Well, yah," I said.

I must've frowned—I'm sure I did.

"No, I mean, really sleep, you know?"

My insides dropped a little. I mean if you could've seen Charlie, she was like this tall, hot babe! I'd already started imagining what it would be like to slowly slither up one of those amazing legs of hers, and now, well....

"Oh yah," I lied. "That's no problem. I mean, as you might well imagine, I'm a little beat now anyhow. No pressure or anything. Just ah...cuddle up and stuff?"

Charlie nodded and when I smiled back, her face just exploded in a grin. Then we got into my car and I headed home for the night.

Uh, morning.

So about half an hour later, I'm in bed watching this gorgeous creature getting ready to come join me. She mentioned something about her period and that explained a lot, and so there I was like usual, in just panties, watching Charlie taking her clothes off.

I realized I really was tired; I just lay there looking at her, looking at how totally creamy those long, shapely legs of hers were as she peeled off her charcoal stockings, how cute her ankles were and the fact that her feet were so pretty I would normally have been sucking on them by that time. I yawned silently and went on watching as the dress came off, then the slip, and then she looked up from giving me this incredible private show and smiled at me.

"I...hope you don't think I'm weird or anything," she whispered, "But I'm really looking forward to just snuggling up...." Then she took off her bra and I nearly got a full night's rest in one split second because those jugs of hers were just outstanding!

I talking world-class bosoms okay?

Then this gorgeous creature is climbing into bed with me wearing nothing but these pretty briefs and I'm just glad I'm not a guy because there would've been three of us there—me, Charlie and my boner!

So then she's getting comfy and I click the lamp off and the bed's moving and I'm turning and she's sorta scooting closer and closer and then we make contact—her warm shoulder against mine—and its...really awkward. I mean we haven't even kissed or done anything sexual or even affectionate, and here I was, getting closer and closer to this woman.

I finally get an arm more or less around her and draw a little closer, and she's snuggling and turning and all I can think about is that I wanna bite her.

Everywhere.

Then she turns her back to me and snuggles her warm backside against my side (my right side), and my clit just goes boing! Her skin's so soft and delicate and her body heat's warming more than just my skin. Plus she had this light, girly scent to her that was just driving me nuts.

Finally though I drift off and aside from everything else, it's just really nice being in bed with a warm, (mostly) naked woman.

Then, blammo, it's morning and I open my eyes and try to remember the dream I had about some tall, long-legged angel whispering that she wanted to spend the night with me, and I turn and look and there's a bare shoulder right next to me, sticking out from the covers. I raise my head and look and there's a bare leg that's gotten outside the blankets, and a hand and the head and...

She's just so damned beautiful, even sleeping.

Then I have to answer the call of nature and so I lift the covers on my side and try to gently roll out of bed so as to not wake Charlie, and the moment I move she turns over and looks at me with these huge, dark, sleepy eyes, and her hair's all mussed up and she looks so totally freshly fucked that I'm jealous of the one who fucked her.

Which was nobody, okay?

"Hi!" she yawns and I tell her good morning and how did you sleep and all that other shit. I'm just staring because with the way she'd turned, one of her boobs was now showing quite clearly beneath the edge of the blanket. I just can't look away, and then she notices and follows my eyes and looks back at me blushing.

Blushing. I mean wtf?

But instead of covering herself up or tucking the blanket back down between her boobs, she suddenly stretches, and it's one of the stretches where everything's reaching and tensing and lifting and I can see the firm line of her butt and the shape of her thighs and waist and hips and the only thing I can do is stare some more.

"I slept so well," she says, and I think I must've nodded or something stupid like that. I'd slept well too, but it was because of dreaming of a cutie in bed with me, without any clothes on, skin to skin, warming me up like a microwave—from the inside out.

"So did I," I lied again. I mean I did, but I woke up hornier than shit and now that I knew for certain that it hadn't all been a dream and that the girl in those dreams was still right here—virtually naked—it really didn't help things. I rolled out of bed and started for the bathroom but before I could reach for the doorknob, Charlie was right there with her eyes all hopeful and stuff.

"Uh, I gotta, you know," I said, and then it hit me. This girl wasn't trying to be first for the toilet; she wanted to be the toilet in a manner of speaking. I didn't have any shot glasses or anything, but then Charlie opened the door for us and stepped inside. She looked so damned cute in her cute little g-stringish briefs I thought I'd just stand there and absorb some of that cuteness.

Maybe an hour would do.

But then she found the cup I use to hold my toothbrush and she rinsed it and then, just like that, knelt right beside the toilet! She looked like this tall, willowy caucasian geisha girl or something, waiting for my command. I took the cup and started to slip my panties off, stopped, and then realized she'd already had hours of seeing me totally bare, and so peeled, put one foot up on the toilet seat and held the cup down beneath me.

It was a little hard trying to 'go' with someone watching that close. I'd gotten used to it when the people were ten feet away or when I was standing on the bar, but this was different.

This was more one-on-one.

I was finally able to go though, and I handed the full cup to Charlie, and then watched in total awe as she gulped the entire cup down in one breath. I mean every last drop. And this was my morning pee, which is pretty dark yellow and strong smelling.

Then just like the perfect guest, she rinsed the cup out thoroughly, dried it with some toilet paper, burped, excused herself in a very ladylike manner, and then put my toothbrush back in it and set it carefully back where she'd found it. She looked up at me and if I was anyone else I would've just fallen head over heels for her right then and there.

Actually, I sorta did but what the fuck right?

So then, not knowing if ice cold orange juice goes better with fresh, warm piss, or whether coffee would've been more appropriate, I offered them both to Charlie. She nodded happily and then we left the bathroom and headed for the kitchen; me not bothering to put anything on, and her still in her cute little briefs.

As the coffeemaker gurgled and hissed away, we sipped orange juice and Charlie told me a little about herself. She told me how she'd always been weird and that she'd been really depressed, but that she at one point said 'fuck it' and this was how she is and whatever anybody thought, fuck them too.

Sorta like me in a way.

Except she really was so exceptionally beautiful—like exquisite beautiful.

Then I told her I was basically a dork and worked in an office; the music band she already knew about. But we're sitting there around my tiny little kitchen table and we're not wearing bathrobes or anything and her tits and her cute shoulders are just out in the open and I'm, you know—looking. And as I am, I notice she's looking and it's like we're comfortable with it at that point. No hiding or anything, just two topless chicks hanging out together drinking orange juice and waiting for the coffee to get finished. Of course she was one up on me because she'd already gulped down a whole glass of my pee, but hey.

And I'm thinking about the last time I gave head to a lady-on-the-rag, and realized it hadn't been that bad, and if this angel-faced cutie didn't say she was headed home pretty soon, I was going to go for it. I mean, I was so damned horny it was pathetic, you know?

"Oh and I've got some extra Tampax if you want 'em," I tell her.

"No, I'm fine," she says, and she's so cute I want to spread margarine all over her, stick pieces of toast on her and have my breakfast that way.

"Well, when you're done," I tell her, "and you want, you can come visit me any time—any time at all. I mean maybe you don't want to ruin whatever 'image' or 'fantasy' you have about me by actually having sex, but...let's just say that if you want, I want too...."

It was on my mind so I just came out and said it to her. But you should'a seen her face! She looked like I'd just asked her to be Queen of Mars or something. Like all honored and shit and embarrassed and happy and flustered.

"But...only if you want," I added, but she was still looking all weird and happy and then her eyes got glossy and a tear ran down her cheek. "You okay?"

She nodded that she was, but started to say something, stopped, started again, and then blinked another tear out of her eyes as she fanned her face with both hands.

"No, I'm okay," she said. "I'm just really...I mean, to actually make love with you? Just snuggling I thought was more than I could ever dream, but now you're saying, saying that...to actually...I mean...."

"Fuck," I laughed. "I would like nothing more than to fuck you Charlie! Just get naked and fuck you with my fingers and my tongue and my face and my lips; just rub my cunt against yours; spray you with pee if you want; lick those long delicious legs of yours; rim your bung-hole—everything. I would just totally do it if you wanted, is what I'm saying."

I wanted to be really clear about that.

She looked almost like she was going to faint or something. I heard the coffeemaker gurgling its last gurgles, and went up to fetch a couple of cups. Charlie just sat there, sniffling, waving a hand in her face, and when I turned and looked back from the cupboard, the sunlight was spilling in from the other room lighting her up and making her look even more like an angel.

Fuck she was gorgeous!

So I poured coffee and took it over. I got the creamer and sugar and spoons and brought those over, and then I sat opposite her again and watched her until she looked up from her thoughts.

"You're just too kind 'n stuff," she finally said. She didn't look up at me but just raised her head enough to pour the creamer and put the sugar in her cup. Then she was stirring and taking too long to stir and so I put creamer and sugar in my cup and spaced out doing the same thing.

"I...I just really wish I could," she said after another three or four minutes. She looked up now and I just wanted to kiss that ridiculously gorgeous face of hers. I mean, the girls on L Word have got nothing on her is what I'm getting at.

"Oh, you're like married to some butchy guy who ignores you and just slams his meat inside you every Friday night and you're tired of being fucking invisible and you want some affection but you can't have an actual affair because you still love the guy and don't want to cheat on him." I said in one breath. "Still, you fantasize and you picked me to fantasize about—but don't ask me why 'cause I'm not much to look at, bottom line."

"Oh no," she said, horrified and somewhat amazed at my perfectly (apparently) wrong assessment. "I'm not married. And as far as picking you, well, the first time I saw you, I wanted to be like you."

"A what—a retard?" I said, and she nearly spit up the coffee she'd just sipped. She shook her head while coughing.

"A what then—lesbian?"

Charlie shook her head.

"That would be easy—especially being with someone like you—so full of life and happy and adjusted and sweet."

"Me, sweet?"

"Yah, totally."

"Then if not that, then...a musician?"

Again she shook her head.

"You could've been a pole-dancer or ballet dancer or playing in the symphony; doesn't matter, you know? No, none of those things. Just you. Yourself. If I could look or be like anyone, I knew it was you...."

Then, just for an instant I thought Okay, she's an alien chick who's now going to morph into me and take over my life while I'm transported off-world to some scary sex-slave factory on Alpha Centauri or something. I hoped there'd be at least a few female clients.

"...so...why can't you" I asked. "Why do you wish you could, and can't?"

"Hmm?"

"Fuck," I said. "Why do you wish you could fuck, but can't?"

"'Cuz," Charlie whispered. "'Cause...I don't have what it takes."

"What, to fuck me?" I asked her. She nodded. "Girl, why not let me decide that?"

"Because it's not just a matter of you deciding or me deciding or anyone deciding," she answered.

And I'm going 'wow, okay man, whatever. You sure are fuckable though.'

She sipped her coffee, then set her cup down.

"It's a matter of an exclamation point instead of a period." she said.

"Huh?"

"I don't have a 'period." she said. I still didn't get it. Was she through? Could I rip those skimpy little briefs off her and eat her out now? Over coffee. We could get donuts later and I could smear them all over her—

"I have...this," she said, and she stood, peeled down her undies and stepped out of them. My eyes went right there! and you know where!

Her bush was trimmed into a beautiful, tiny little arrow-head pointing downward. Not thick hair either, but really pretty and faint. Wispy is a good word. Wispy pubes. My nipples hardened and my clit rose just thinking of what I might be having soon.

But then the girl, as naked as I was now, slid her right foot to the side a little bit, and as her incredible thighs opened, down dropped the biggest clit I ever saw in my life.

Except...yah, it had a fleshy sac right behind it and it was a...

I looked up into her eyes and she was near tears again except this time it was obviously not because of some wonderful feeling she was having! I looked down again, down that lean and trim body of hers, down that creamy tummy and the cute pussy-mustache, and now, even though I knew I was seeing things, I recognized her little 'clit' as what it truly was.

A dick.

A cock.

A schlong.

A penis.

You get the idea.

My mind whirled. Thoughts swarmed all over the place, but the main thing I realized I was thinking, was how goddamned pretty the thing was. I mean it was uncircumcised, was completely limp and was maybe just an inch long with the bag tightly bunched up behind it.