Rest In Peace

"Listen, I'm going to go home. I just remembered I'm out of cat food and have to stop at the market before it closes."

As soon as she said that about the cat food, she felt sad being alone with her cat. How typical. She felt like an old maid already. She fit the profile. She lived alone and she already had the cat. If she lived a hundred years ago, she'd be considered an old maid and past her prime.

Suddenly, alone again in her little lonely life, much like darkness settling in around her, she felt a sadness overwhelm her. She didn't want to go home. She wished she had somewhere else to go with someone. She put it out of her mind, got out of her car, walked in the market, and bought her cat food.

Addicted to coffee since Carl died, coffee is what kept her awake. She didn't want to sleep. She hated sleeping ever since Carl died. She dreaded sleeping alone.

There was a Starbucks next door to the market and she bought a cup of coffee to clear her head and to keep her awake from the two drinks she had with her co-workers at the pub. Sad, depressed, and lonely, she walked to her car mindlessly sipping her hot coffee. The coffee tasted good. It was fresh and it was one of the few things that made her feel alive. Then, as she lifted the heavy bag of cat food out of her cart, her bag broke and cat food cans rolled every which way.

Intent on retrieving her cat food cans, kneeling on the ground while trying not to spill her hot coffee, she never saw or heard the car backing up. When she did, it was too late to save herself. Suddenly time slowed. What seemed like minutes were nanoseconds. Frozen from an instant panic, she suddenly relaxed to a calm state knowing that she was about to die from a car tire rolling over her head.

Prepared to accept her inevitable fate, she welcomed death. Maybe she'd be with Carl, after all. She saw her grandmother who had died so long ago, when she was a little girl and there was her best friend, Sally, who died of pneumonia, when they were just kids. There was a bright light and she was traveling down a narrow tunnel at a high rate of speed. She was so happy, so calm, and so serene. Everything was so peaceful. She was glad she was going to die, but then, suddenly, as soon as she thought about the inevitably of death, she wanted to live. Suddenly, her panic returned and she was falling back to Earth.

Who would care of her cat? What about her job? She'd miss her family and friends. She didn't want to die. She wasn't ready to die, yet. She wanted to meet her Mr. Right and have children.

"No!" She screamed.

She didn't even feel the man's hands tug at her ankles and pull her to safety, just in the nick of time. The car tire missed by inches, so close that she bumped her head on the underside of the bumper, as he pulled her to safety. She was lucky to be alive.

"Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Lady, are you okay? Oh, my God! Oh, my God!.

He was shaking, while holding her and hugging her and hopping up and down. Then, they just hugged.

Then, she felt this calm, his calm, come over her and it was then that she felt finally safe. Maybe she was in shock. Maybe, knowing that she was about to die, the dopamine released into her brain put her somewhere she needed to be to protect her from the pain of death.

Then, when she realize what had almost happened, she was screaming and crying. The stranger, this man, who had saved her life comforted and consoled her. Coming from out of nowhere, he was her angel.

"There, there. It's okay. You're safe now. I have you. You're okay. You're with me, now."

When he said that to her, you're with me now, she pulled away from him to look at him. She really hadn't seen who he was until then. He was a nice enough looking man, not as good looking as Carl, but he was her age, maybe a little bit older, and he had kind eyes. Nearly just crushed to death, she couldn't believe she was thinking of him as boyfriend material. With her luck, he's married or involved with someone else. She couldn't believe it when she looked at his finger to see if he was wearing a ring. He wasn't.

"I'm okay," she said pulling more away from him to wipe the tears from her eyes and the dirt from her clothes and to take another look at him.

"I never saw you," said the driver of the vehicle, an elderly woman, coming out to check on her. "I'm so sorry. What were you doing under my car?"

"I dropped my cat food," she said.

"I almost killed you," she said. "You need to be more careful, " she said abruptly getting back in her car and leaving.

"I wasn't paying attention to where I was looking," she said suddenly feeling her conversation was scripted and she had no control over the words that came out of her mouth.

She remembered Carl had said that and now she was saying that.

"Come, let me replace your coffee," he said wiping away the coffee that threatened to stain her coat. "It's the least that I can do."

Again, that was something Carl had said so long ago.

"No, that's okay," she said thinking she'd be late for work, only she didn't have to go to work again, until tomorrow morning. Suddenly, she had an overwhelming feeling of de ja vous.

"I'm John," he said offering her his hand and giving her a smile.

"Sarah," she said shaking his hand and returning his smile.

"Please I insist. Allow me to buy you another coffee. It's the least that I can do. If I don't replace your coffee, I'd feel terrible about denying you your caffeine fix for the evening. Besides, it's best that you sit and calm your nerves before driving home and maybe we can get some ice for that bump on your head."

She remembered that Carl had said that about feeling bad denying her caffeine fix.

"Okay," she said making eye contact and wondering if he was Carl reincarnated.

There was something about him that was so familiar, as if she had met him before and known him in another life. Even the words he chose and how he said them reminded her of Carl.

As soon as he touched her hand, she couldn't speak. All she could do was to look, gaze actually, in his brown eyes. He was definitely her type, tall and thin, as was Carl. Only, instead of having the body of a swimmer, broad shouldered with a narrow waist, he had the body of a runner, thin but sinewy with defined muscles.

After she deposited her cat food in her car, they walked to Starbucks and talked over a cup of coffee. They've been together ever since. Now, married, with two children, a boy and a girl, they live in the country with their dog, Carl, a German Shepherd. No longer does she hear Carl's voice.

Sarah thought it appropriate to name her dog after the man who encouraged her to meet John.