Revenge of the Nerd Ch. 09byrpsuch©
I was lying in my bed. I couldn't move. I tried to lift up my head but I didn't seem to have the energy. "What happened?"
"You passed out."
"I can't move."
He laughed. "That won't last long. You expended so much energy your body just doesn't want to move at the moment."
"What did you do? I felt like I was exploding. I, I can't even really describe it. Whew. If that's what sex is supposed to be like, you just took my virginity."
He laughed again. "It may have sapped your strength, but it hasn't dulled your sense of humor."
"What was that? I never felt anything like it."
"You had an orgasm."
"No shit. But it never felt like that. What did you do?"
"Well, time for a little class now that there's less urgency. You remember about the nerve paths to the brain?"
"Yeah. Jen told me about it. I felt it this time."
"You have nerves all over your body. But you only have one set of nerves. They have to perform multiple functions. When I caress your face like this, how does it feel?"
"Very nice, thank you."
"The nerves carry that sensation of touch and the feelings of pleasure. You have other nerves that transmit even stronger signals of pleasure."
"I noticed," I said.
"If I stuck you with a pin, what would you feel?"
"Nerves carry pain signals too. What if you lit a match and forgot to blow it out?"
"I'd get burned."
"And the nerves would tell your brain it was really hot and you should do something about it, like drop the match or blow it out. Nerves transmit signals of heat and cold too."
"Well, it turns out, that in certain situations the brain has trouble differentiating between the signals. At the moment of orgasm, while the brain is being overwhelmed by pleasure, that's the only message it recognizes.
"So, if, when you started to come, I were to squeeze your clit very hard, the brain would misinterpret it as even more intensely pleasurable. But afterward you'd be bruised and it would hurt.
"I could put a lit match down there at that moment and your brain wouldn't say, 'Ouch,' but 'Wow.' Of course that would cause some damage that would last a while and you wouldn't be too happy with me. But,"
"The ice cube! No residual damage." Damn! Who thought this stuff up?
"The ice cube. It's like an amplifier. The brain just hears more pleasure. It's only for a very brief time. Then it just gets recognized as cold and gets painful.
"It's just like after an orgasm. Continued stimulation can start to feel painful. You've only got that brief moment to work with, but if you get it right, it can really kick it up a notch."
"Thanks, Emeril. And believe me, if you were a woman and felt the effect of those ice cubes, you wouldn't use that limp-ass ‘kick it up a notch.' It was mind blowing. Where did you learn all this stuff? Did you go to the Cordon Screw?"
"I read it in a book," he said.
"You read it in a book?"
"I read it in a book."
"Where can I buy the book?"
"You're a funny girl. That's one of the things I like about you."
My strength was starting to return, but I felt no urgency to get up.
"And you're a strange guy."
"Do you like me anyway?"
"What do you think?"
"I don't know. You've acted kind of strangely yourself. That's why I'm asking."
"Of course I do."
Men. They always have their doubts. Not all men really. Most of the men I date have no doubts at all. They should, but they don't.
"We have to do this again. But not too often; I don't think I could take it." I sighed. "God, I'm so embarrassed. I didn't do a thing for you. I, I'm never that selfish. You just had me so, involved, it completely slipped my mind. I'm so sorry."
"Don't worry about it. I had a good time."
"I can do much better. You have to give me another chance."
"Hey, I was so turned on at your reactions I was about to burst a blood vessel. You did notice I was aroused, didn't you?"
But I hadn't really taken any notice of how big it was; just what it was doing to me. That came as a real surprise. It wasn't huge, but that's all I was really aware of. That and the fact that it wasn't relevant.
"Well, I still want another crack at it."
"It may not be obvious, but I don't just slut around with anyone. There needs to be some sort of emotional connection for me. I don't have to be in love, but I have to be in like. You're going to need to romance me."
"So you like me?" I asked.
"Yes, I do."
Hey, no girl ever tires of hearing this and as long as he doesn't say, "Because you have big tits," there is almost no bad answer. Actually, there are a lot of girls who will settle for that.
"I love your sense of humor. I like your intelligence. And on the rare occasion, you can actually be warm and sweet."
"That's not a very nice thing to say."
I exaggerated it, but was surprised to find I was a little hurt.
"It's true, isn't it?"
"I suppose. But I don't like to think of myself that way."
"There's a solution: don't act that way."
Boy did he have a set.
"Your after play needs some work."
"This is relationship building, not after play."
"How did you switch to so serious all of a sudden?" I asked.
"I'm interested in whether we have any future together. I don't mean in the sense of a committed relationship. God knows I'm not ready for that with anyone. But I'd like to know if I was just your one nerd experiment and that's all this is to you."
I avoided his eyes. I wasn't sure what this was myself. How did he know me so well?
"You're not a …" yes he was, and it would be insulting to deny it. He really just laid it out there. Here's my vulnerability. Are you going to crush me?
"Thanksgiving break is coming up. Were you planning on taking me home to meet your parents and your friends?" he asked.
"I hadn't really thought about it."
"And now that you have?"
"I, um, well, it's not, I really …"
He laughed. "Can't do it, huh? It would hurt your status to bring home a nerd, and a not especially good-looking one at that."
"You don't look bad."
"Thanks for the underwhelming vote of confidence." There was no rancor in his voice.
"I understand. At this point in your life you're too immature for me. When you grow up, you could consider looking me up again."
"That's not fair."
"That's what I thought. I know it doesn't sound nice, but I learned the lesson from an older woman. She was right. I was not sufficiently mature for her."
"Did you learn that in a book too?"
"No. From studying people and their behavior and myself and my behavior. She did me a favor, although I thought she was pretty harsh at the time."
I hoped some of the guys I had cut off at the knees were that understanding.
"You're just too involved in yourself at this point in your life to have a solid relationship with somebody else. No offense intended," he said.
I'm supposed to say, "None taken." But it did hurt, especially because I realized it was probably true.
"I don't know what to say." I couldn't look him in the eyes.
"That's okay. I find when I don't know what to say, it usually works out best if I don't say anything."
I took his advice.
"Are you going home for Thanksgiving?" he asked.
"Could I get a ride back to Lower Merion with you?"
"You live in Lower Merion?" My voice reflected my astonishment.
"Oh my God. Did you go to Lower Merion High School?"
"Me too. That's amazing. We might even have met back then. What a coincidence."
"We did," he said.
This was a hell of a conversation to have naked. I looked carefully at him and it hit me. He had grown quite a bit, filled out some, and looked quite different, yet sufficiently the same.
"Willie?" This time there was no derision in my voice. It was quiet and sad.
"But where did Jeff come from? Have you been trying to humiliate me?"
"I switched to my middle name when I got to college. I got tired of all the 'little Willie' jokes. My whole family agreed, even though it was difficult for them to change to Jeff. They always called me Bill."
"I'm really sorry. I was probably worse then than I am now. I didn't mean to hurt you; I just didn't think about other people. I don't know, maybe I did. I was pretty self-centered."
"I know. After all I did for you I was pretty angry. I fantasized about some kind of revenge."
"I guess you got it after all," I said.
"I hope not. It was a childish fantasy. What would revenge get me? Besides, without you I might never have thought to learn about people."
I was pretty sure he didn't realize he still had a lot to learn about people. He had started getting dressed and I did the same, though I felt enough connection that it would have been nice to just lie there with him for a while.
"I'd still be too immature to be of any good to anyone. I owe you," he said.
I had some idea of how he must have felt back then except he wasn't trying to put me down when he said it. If it felt this bad being told nicely, well, I didn't want to think about it.
"Well, if you owe me, will you wait for me to grow up?"
Why had I said that? I didn't know that I wanted him. Maybe I did. They say to trust your initial reactions. He took me off the hook.
"We'll see where we are when that happens. I'd still like that ride."
"I still want the name of that book."