tagReviews & EssaysReview: Chrissy Does It All

Review: Chrissy Does It All

byvelvetpie©

G-String Divas, Chrissy Does It All.

Starring Chrissy.

Chrissy gives lap dances and advice.

* * * * *

Chrissy is a short blonde with hazel eyes and fake D breasts. She begins the segment with the question: Have you ever wondered what it's like to be with another woman?"

The segment segues into Chrissy and two other women lick icing or whipped cream off of another woman's breasts. The show asks the question: Can a woman who loves women seduce men? We see through a few vignettes of her performing a lap dance and stage dancing that she is a consummate professional.

Chrissy is in her car, heading to the club. She says that it's challenging to blend dancing with sexuality to make the audience believe that you're really hot right at that moment. Arriving at the club, the backstage dressing area is teeming with beautiful women, all in various stages of preparation for their dance numbers. Chrissy says that she likes Divas (the club) and has gotten to know everyone and has built some small relationships. "It's almost like an office."

One of the girls tells the story of a table dance she was doing for an old man. In the middle of the dance, his phone rang and he answered it, telling the person on the other end, "I'm having a table dance right now. Can I call you back?"

Chrissy goes out to do her number and she is very good at what she does. She exudes a come-hither sexuality that captures every man in the audience and she plays to the shy, quiet underdogs. She says that you can't really say that one sex is better than the other, that some people are very sexual, whether you have a penis or not. Some people have penises and they're just gross. While she says this, she's doing a table dance for a middle-aged man who insists upon rubbing his $1 tip on her pussy instead of placing it in her panties.

Chrissy is living with a woman, Adrienne, and they're living a very happy life. Adrienne is a very feminine woman with shoulder-length brown hair and is the editor for a feminist magazine. She says that she was almost afraid to tell her what she did for a living but did so on the second date because she didn't want any secrets. She brings Adrienne to the club and they sit together and watch the girls dance. The ladies meet a girl named Jordan and Chrissy buys Adrienne a lap dance. Jordan does a very sexy lap dance while Chrissy watches.

Chrissy says that she's sometimes self-conscious around women that she finds sexy and she will dance away from them when they come into the club. Adrienne thanks Jordan for the lap dance but states that even though she's very beautiful and very sexy, that it was just an act to her because she's so in love with Chrissy.

Chrissy is on stage again, performing a dance in a slinky, black dress and rhinestones. She says that she has a Master's degree in psychology and was working as a therapist. She says that it's helped her in her dancing. There are different men who come to the club for different reasons, she explains. There are the bachelor party guys, who come in once in a while and then there are the lonely guys, who love the attention.

General Manager and Owner, Bill Love, says that he tells the girls to get guys to go into the private room with them, called the Champagne Court. There, depending on what alcohol you purchase, you can spend time with your favorite stripper. Chrissy says that the club charges $60 for a half hour and the girls charge $100-200 for a half hour. She says that most of the men just want someone to talk to and that they don't usually end up doing lap dances or anything in there. However, with a client they're filming, she ends up doing a lap dance for him.

She talks about her home life, that it's very boring and domestic compared to work. She pulls out a photo album and shows a photo of herself when she was four. Then moves on to show a man named Matt, her ex-husband. She says that she didn't know she was gay back then and she figured that he was the nicest guy that she was ever going to meet and that she would fall in love with him. Obviously, something went south and they are divorced.

Back at work, Chrissy says that she and Adrienne have broken up because Adrienne couldn't stand Chrissy's job and was upset that she let men touch her. She says that drunk men are fun because they'll howl at anything. Back stage, Chrissy says that she's having problems getting lap dances and asks some of the other girls for advice.

She convinces a gentleman to get a lap dance from her and says you wouldn't believe some of the things that men say to her. She tells about a problem she had in the Champagne Court one evening where a customer was extremely touchy-feely and was almost holding her down. Another girl interviewed says that Chrissy was a little drunk and brought a riding crop (whip) back with her and thinks that she just went too far. She ended up having to punch the guy.

Chrissy is shown giving some sort of mechanical therapy to a patient and she says that she wants to become certified in endormology, the only solution for cellulite and hopes to pay off her machine soon. She paid $32,000 for the machine. At the end of the segment, we see her performing once again and at the end of the night, she has difficulties shoving her tips into her tiny purse.

OPINION: One out of four. I must admit, with a title like "G-String Divas", I was expecting a lot more sex. This series is a documentary series. A few of the ladies who work at the Divas International club had their lives taped and this episode was Chrissy. What I learned was that it seems to be a very lonely life for the ladies unless they have a significant other who is comfortable with what they do for a living. I would have liked to have seen a bit more depth; maybe Chrissy wasn't a good choice and other episodes might be more to my liking. If you're curious about the stripper lifestyle, it gives you a rudimentary tip-of-the-iceberg look.

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