She's Special Ch. 06

Clint sat in front of Katherine's house not knowing what he was going to do. The house was dark and silent, almost as dark as he was now. He had not realized how much he really depended on Katherine until she left earlier. It was like his light was gone. Did she leave with Sean? Were they OK?

Groaning, Clint dropped his head to the steering wheel. Why didn't she just talk to him? Why did she think he could ever walk away from her and Sean?

Because I never told her, that's why.

Clint cursed a blue streak. This was his fault in some convoluted way. He had not told Katherine she was special to him, that she was the most important part of him and now it was too late.

If he thought the betrayal and lies he went through with his ex-wife was bad, they were nothing compared to the thought of never being able to hold Katherine, make love to her, or tell her how he felt. Why did it take losing her to realize that he loved her more than life itself?

Silently, he called himself every name imaginable and tried to think of where she would have gone. He hoped that once she calmed down and he'd calmed down, he could have come over and figure out where they stood. He didn't mean it earlier when he told her now or never, he was just pissed off and angry. He felt like she didn't trust him to not hurt her.

And she didn't. She had kept it in the back of her head that he would leave at some point.

Clint was about to leave when another car pulled into the driveway behind him. He looked into the review mirror and recognized her uncle's car. Clint cringed. He wouldn't blame Todd one bit if he beat the living hell out of him. Slowly, Clint opened the door to face the man that had become part of his family over the past few months.

What he saw in the car about broke his heart. Sean was sitting there and it was obvious that he'd been crying. Clint started towards the car and stopped dead in his tracks at Todd's words, "Don't you dare go near him right now."

"What's wrong? Where's Katherine?" Clint felt the dread and fear wash through him and he could barely breathe.

"He forgot his bear that you won him and couldn't sleep." Todd ignored his other question, "Why are you here, Clint?"

Bile rose in his throat and he choked it down, "I need to talk to her. I need to know she's alright, Todd." He pleaded, "Please."

Katherine's uncle looked like he wanted to punch him and Clint would have gladly stood there for it, but Todd just walked around to the other side of the car and opened the door for Sean. He unlocked the front door to the house and told Sean, "Go get what you need. I'll be right here." When Sean walked into the house Todd turned and pinned Clint with a glare, "She needed to leave for a few days and when she gets back you will stay the fuck away from my niece."

Clint didn't answer or agree with Todd's edict. Blindly he stared at the front porch swing remembering back just two days ago.

Katherine had been sitting next to him, her head leaning against his shoulder. Clint remembered feeling like he was exactly where he belonged. Sean had been sitting on the porch in front of them playing with his LEGOS. She had started talking to him about wanting to take Sean camping this weekend. They were supposed to leave tomorrow morning. He had been looking forward to taking Sean fishing for the first time and Katherine had cringed at the thought of baiting a hook with a worm. He had smiled down at her and teased her about being such a girl.

Her words taunted him now when she had told him, "But, you like this girl and don't you forget it."

He remembered the way she had melted into him as he kissed her, showing her just how much he liked her.

Clint was brought back from his memories by Sean asking, "Why can't I stay here with you tonight, Clint?"

Looking up at Todd and seeing the man cross his arms over his chest, he told Sean, "Your mommy thought it would be a good idea for you to stay with your aunt and uncle for a couple of days. Did you get what you needed from the house?"

Sean nodded and it looked like he was going to cry, "Mommy was really sad. Do you know why?"

Todd started to say something but Clint cut him off, "Sean, me and your mommy had a little bit of an argument. I was upset and said some things I shouldn't have." His own eyes burned, "I promise it will be OK. Don't worry."

Sean looked up into his eyes with eyes so damn much like Katherine's that Clint's breathing hitched, "Can we call her?"

Clint looked up at Todd, "Do you mind if we use your phone? I doubt she'll answer if..." He didn't have to finish the thought because Todd tossed him the phone. "Sean, don't tell mommy I'm here. She won't be too happy with that right now, but I swear to you that as soon as she gets home I'll talk to her. OK?"

When Sean nodded, Clint sat on the front steps and dialed the all too familiar number. He had to clench his jaw as he waited to hear her voice answer the phone. As soon as he heard her soft hello, he handed the phone to Sean. It took everything in him from grabbing the phone and demanding to know where she was.

Clint listened to Sean talk to his mom for a minute and he listened to Sean tell her he loved her and missed her. Sean was standing right next to him, so he wrapped his arm around the boy and held him close. Once he closed the phone, Sean clutched onto Clint tight. Clint felt a tear roll down his cheek as Sean said, "Love you."

He had to clear his throat, "I love you, too, Little Man." Clint picked Sean up and walked him to the car, "Now you need to pay close attention and be good for your aunt and uncle. I'll see you soon."

Todd spoke up as Clint came around the car, "What in the hell happened?"

Keeping his voice low so Sean wouldn't hear, "I fucked up. When you told me about her leaving the office, I lost it." He ran his hands over his face, "It's my fault. I just need to talk to her, to explain."

The older man looked at him, sizing him up. He stated, "You love her."

Clint didn't answer him, "If you talk to her..."

Todd shook his head, "I won't. She isn't talking to anyone right now other than Sean." He patted Clint's shoulder, "Hits you like a freight train, don't it?"

"I should have told her, shown her more. I didn't mean for this to happen." Clint glanced at Sean, "Damn. I miss him already."

"You became the father that Jake should have been for him."

Clint groaned, "He's scared, Todd. What do I do? I don't know how to fix this without her. Even if she can't forgive me, I can't just walk away. I won't walk away from either of them."

Todd clapped Clint on the back, "Go home. Things have a way of working themselves out."

He looked at the house and asked, "Without her, where is home?"

***

Katherine was curled up in a ball on the bed. After she talked to Sean, she cried for over an hour. Not only was it her fault that her son no longer had his father in his life, but Clint now, too.

She had known this would happen eventually, but was selfish and wanted whatever time she could have with him. Would she do it all over again if she had the choice? Yes. The past couple of months had shown her what life could be if you were with the person you loved. Clint taught her that even though the outcome may hurt, you don't settle for second best.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as she thought about how they fell into a natural routine. She thought about how she and Sean had talked about Clint staying at the house before Clint got there for movie night and how Sean had asked if Clint would be able to play with him more.

Katherine cried, remembering how Clint had looked at her expectantly when she asked him to stay that night. He had looked at Sean asking if it was OK with him and Sean had readily agreed. Clint always did that, he included Sean in any decision that affected them all. That first night Clint had put Sean to bed and sat with him reading until they both had fallen asleep.

She had stood in the doorway watching them. Sean had curled up on Clint's chest and Clint had wrapped his arm around Sean, tucking him in close. It stole her breath seeing them, her two men, sharing a moment like that. She had stood there for a while when she realized Clint's eyes were open and he was staring at her.

The way he looked at her that night, every single time he looked at her, had set her blood to boil. He was the only man that had ever had that kind of effect on her. That night he made love to her. It was slow and all night long. There wasn't one inch of her body that he didn't touch or tease. For the first time since Jake, Katherine had believed she was sexy and desired.

Katherine really thought that they had a chance. Did they bicker every now and then? Sure, but didn't everyone?

The part that hurt the most was that she had been afraid to tell him about buying the building next to her uncle's, well, now it was Clint's. In the back of her mind she thought that eventually they'd move all of the offices into it and leave her old office as a break area for the crew. Sure, it would have been her building technically, but it would have been theirs.

He didn't give her a chance to explain that though. Clint had come in raising twenty different kinds of hell and instead of explaining it, Katherine had aired her insecurities. What she always thought would happen. Now there was no way he'd ever want to be with her.

Somehow she'd have to pull herself together and head home in the morning. She planned to take a day to de-Clint the house without Sean there. The thought of explaining the situation to Sean made her blood run cold. Hopefully, Clint won't take it out on Sean. He genuinely seemed to like spending time with Sean. Suddenly Katherine felt sick to her stomach and ran for the bathroom.

***

Clint went to the office the next morning hoping to bury his self in work. Unfortunately, that wasn't meant to be. After a sleepless night, thinking of nothing but Katherine and how he should have told her how he felt, he comes in to find two of his crew members boxing up Katherine's personal belongings.

Clint asked, "What in the hell are you all doing?"

Like he didn't already know, she refused to even come back to the office and face him. Watching the guys go through her desk and empty everything into boxes was driving him over the edge.

"Mr. Himes told us to box this stuff up for Katie, Boss." Darrel explained.

Clint gave the man credit. He didn't look comfortable with the task. Clint told them, "Leave it. I'll take care of it. Where does it need to go?"

Darrel stuttered, "Uh...uh..."

"Tell me, Darrel."

"But, Mr. Himes..." Clint raised his eyebrow at the guy. Darrel finally told him, "Next door, Boss."

Clint told them, "Thank you. Go finish inventory."

After they walked out of the office, Clint sat down at Katherine's desk and looked at the picture of her and Sean, his woman and son, if only in heart. He groaned and dropped his head on her desk. Why did it turn out this way? Why did he not just ask her instead of going off? What on earth was he going to do without her?

Just hearing Katherine's voice made him feel good. Seeing her face every morning made his day start out right. Feeling her body curled into his at night and her hair spread over his chest soothed his soul. Last night was the worst night he'd ever had. Not knowing how she was, when she'd be back, if Sean was able to sleep. Who read to him last night? Did they make the voices the right way?

Fuck. He had it bad.

Slowly, Clint finished boxing everything up around the office. Without all of Katherine's pictures and things, the place looked empty and barren. It reminded him of how he felt without her.

Clint picked up the picture of them again. Seeing how beautiful she was and how her eyes lit up when she smiled stole his breath. Seeing Sean with those same eyes, so full of happiness, staring up at his mother like she was the only thing he needed in the world had him almost in tears. He couldn't lose them when he just got them. He loved them more than anything in this world.

He walked over to his desk to set the picture on it. Hell, she probably wouldn't notice it was missing for a few more days. He'll just make a copy of it and take it to her later. That's when he saw the notation on the calendar.

Don't forget, we leave this afternoon. I can't wait to sit by the fire with you and Sean.

X O X O

Katherine

Clint picked up the lamp on his desk and threw it across the room. He was mad at himself. He was so filled with fury that he was shaking and his vision blurred. Why didn't he take care of the most important part of him? Why didn't he realize it before it was too late?

There had to be a way to fix this. He'd grovel, beg, and or cry. Anything she needed.

***

Katherine heard the door open to her new office. She was under her desk hooking up the new computer and modem, so she hollered out, "I'm under here. Give me a minute!"

She heard footsteps approach her and glanced towards whoever it was and froze. She knew those boots.

Clint.

Oh God, I'm not ready to see him, yet!

She swallowed, tried to breathe. Sandpaper, her mouth felt like sandpaper.

She was damn near hyperventilating when she heard him ask hoarsely, "Do you need help?"

Yeah, you know that thing you took from me? My heart, can I have it back? She cleared her throat and her voice sounded strange to her own ears, almost like it was gravelly, "I think I got it."

Katherine had finished hooking everything up, but couldn't come out. She was afraid to look into his eyes and see that he didn't want her anymore. Afraid that she was right, that he was done with her.

She heard him sigh, "You can come out, Katherine. I won't bite."

A blush covered her face when a memory of how he did bite filled her mind. He was in between her thighs, smiling broadly up at her, her begging him not to tease her anymore and him laughing, her trying to sit up and Clint biting her inner thigh before he licked her swollen pussy.

Katherine clenched her eyes shut, wishing she could fight how she felt about him. Just the thought of what they had done together made her wet for him and he hadn't even touched her.

Slowly, she slid out from under the desk. Her back was still to him as she asked, "Work OK?"

"Katherine..." she jerked as his hand covered hers. He moved his hand and sighed, "How's Sean?"

"He's good." Katherine bit her lip before she told him, "He wants to know if you'll still take him fishing sometime."

God, she hated this. Her son still loves Clint as much as she does, probably always will. This is what she should have felt like when her and Jake split, but this was a million times worse, not only for her, but Sean as well. It had only been thirty-six hours since everything happened, but she knew it would always feel like this whenever she was near him.

"I'd love to take him, if it's OK with you."

Katherine couldn't keep the shakiness from her voice, "Of course you can. He loves you."

Clint asked barely above a whisper, "Is he the only one who loves me?"

She begged, "Don't, Clint."

She felt him run his fingers through her hair and tears welled in her eyes. He dropped it, "Can I pick Sean up from Mary's and take him this afternoon?"

Katherine was afraid to say anything, if she did she'd break down completely again. Nodding, she clutched the desk in front of her. She heard him walk back towards the door and had to fight the urge to beg him to stop.

He opened the door and paused, "Katherine..." she looked up and saw how tired he looked. He admitted softly, "I miss you."

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she watched him walk away. She whispered to herself, "I miss you, too."

***

It had been four days since he dropped Sean off after taking him fishing. Four days of no sleep. Four days of barely eating. He felt miserable and nothing was helping. Clint felt like one of those crazed stalkers. He watched for her to come to work and walk into her new office. He watched to see who was coming in the office. He was watching her now.

She was up in the bleachers smiling at James. One of the single men with a child on the t-ball team he coached now. Clint stood by the dugout, gripping the chain length fence. He took a small bit of satisfaction at the fact that the smile on her face didn't reach her eyes, like it used to for him.

For the first time since he started coaching, he wished the damn game would hurry up. He couldn't stand watching another man near her. Just the thought of what he was saying to her, was eating away at him. Was she falling for it?

Grudgingly, Clint had to admit that James was a good guy, but not for Katherine. No one would ever be good enough for her, not even him. He groaned and Darrel patted Clint on the back.

"You all still on the outs, huh?"

Clint grunted. There was no reason to voice it, everyone already knew. It was a wonder Darrel even spoke to him after the way he treated his guys at work.

"Just so you know...he's taking her to dinner tomorrow night. They are going to the country club, but you didn't hear it from me." Clint looked up at Darrel wanting to ask why he was telling him, but Darrel shrugged his shoulders, "I've never seen Katie as happy as she was when she was with you. We miss seeing that spark she had."

Clint admitted, "I don't know what to do to get her back."

Darrel laughed, "You show her how you feel and prove it."

He stared at Katherine in the stands and his breath caught as her eyes met his. They held for a moment and he had to clench his jaw, trying to keep himself from crossing the distance and staking his claim right here, right now. James said something to her and he looked up to see where she was staring. The man had the nerve to wave at Clint.

Clint did the only thing he could that wouldn't cause a scene. He ignored the gesture completely and focused on the kids on the field.

Tomorrow night he'd make his point known the only way he knew how.

***

What was she doing here, the Country Club of all places, with someone who was nice enough, but took entirely too much effort to pay attention to? She reminded herself that that was the whole point. She wasn't interested in him in any way. Therefore he wouldn't make her feel the way Clint did.

Oh he was attractive enough. Looked to be in decent shape, clean cut, said all the right things, but she just didn't want to be here. Well, she didn't want to be here with him.

Five days of crying herself to sleep every night was wearing away at her. It took every ounce of strength she could muster just to get out of bed anymore. Katherine knew she would be hurt if or when she and Clint parted ways, but she never imagined feeling this desolate. She knew she had to get her head screwed on straight, but couldn't seem to do so.

And apparently, she was ignoring her date. James was looking at her expectantly and Katherine had to ask, "I'm sorry, I was lost in thought. What did you say?"

He chuckled, "Did you have a long day?"

Katherine nodded, "I guess you could say that. Could you excuse me for a moment?"

She wanted to roll her eyes as he stood up when she left the table, like they were at some formal event not dinner. Katherine shamed herself for her thoughts. He was being polite, the perfect gentleman. She should be happy that he was, but she found herself thinking about a certain man who was more of a brute, who took what he wanted.

Katherine looked at herself in the bathroom mirror saying, "Get over it. Force yourself to move on. James is a perfectly good guy."

She splashed water on her face and took a moment to reapply her lipstick. Katherine took a fortifying breath and left the bathroom. She was mentally giving herself a pep talk when she heard, "You know he'll never make you feel the way I do."