tagHumor & SatireSpoof: Anal

Spoof: Anal

byGoldeniangel©

Author's Note: Angel and the Bri-Guy are two of my favorite characters that I share with another writer, drksideofthemoon and we write many humor stories about them. I've decided to play with them some more this year, and I hope you enjoy although it's a little different from their previous adventures... and yes, Tonya Teaser will be joining them eventually. There are other stories about Angel, Bri-Guy and Tonya on both mine and drksideofthemoon's bios if you want to check them out.

---------------------------------------

Angel was sitting on the beach, enjoying her long vacation, her luscious tits were barely encased by the triangles of her bikini top and her g-string bottom left little to the imagination.

*poof*

The Bri-Guy appeared beside her and she shrieked, spilling her drink with the fruit on a toothpick all over herself. Bri-Guy grinned appreciatively at her now wet top and glistening stomach, reaching over he picked the cherry out of her belly button. Angel smacked his hand and he dropped it in the sand, staring sadly down as his chance to get her cherry disappeared.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, furious, glaring at him very hard.

Bri-Guy sighed, "It's 2006, our vacation is over. There's a new Survivorphile contest you know, so the Big Woman is recruiting us again."

"Well I won't do it," Angel said decisively as she wiped the spilled fruit drink from her body.

"Oh come on, please," he begged, "I haven't seen you in months and I'm so horny that I've grown a fourth horn!"

Angel eyed him, "Where?" She didn't see any new horn. To her surprise, the Bri-guy blushed.

"I'll show you later..." he muttered, "But you won't get to see it unless you agree to be part of the story."

Her curiosity was aroused, she had to admit... and it would be good to see everyone again.

"Alright," she sighed, "But not today, let me finish my vacation and I'll meet you tomorrow at my place."

The Bri-Guy shrugged, leered at her boobs which were threatening to burst out of her top one last time and then

*poof*

Angel sighed and leaned back... her last day of vacation. Might as well make the most of the sun's rays. She pulled off her bikini top for a topless tan, and most of the male population on the beach was forced to immediately run into the freezing water to hide their bulges.

**********************************

"So what are we doing?" Angel asked the next day, lounging on her couch with the Bri-Guy.

"Well, she wants us to do a bunch of the categories from the site. Our way." he said, he was actually very happy with the assignment - especially today's!

Angel looked at him suspiciously, "And what exactly do you mean by that?"

"Like today," he said, rubbing his hands together with glee, "Today is 'Anal'".

Angel groaned.

"We've got to do it just like the other stories," the Bri-guy was already whipping off his clothes, his dick rock hard. Angel frowned at it.

"What did you do to that?" she demanded, "It's... it's BIGGER."

The Bri-Guy nodded, "It's special, just for this story! I've noticed that all the anal guys have big cocks, wide like a coke can and long long long!"

Angel stared in trepidation at the thing that was supposed to go in her tender tush, "I don't think so."

"What?!" he said, "But that's what all the stories say!"

"No," she said firmly, "You shrink that thing down or it's not going anywhere."

Deflated, in more ways that one, the Bri-Guy complied - although as soon as her back was turned he boosted it up again. Just a little bit.

Looking over her shoulder Angel said, "You better have brought the lube, I don't have any."

"Better!" said the Bri-Guy, very cheerful now that his dick was more like a sausage (although he was rather sad about losing the coke can cock), "I have butter!"

"Butter?" Angel practically choked as he showed her the rectangular stick.

"Yep," he said proudly, "It's supposed to be great!"

Gritting her teeth, Angel presented her luscious ass to him, looking down at the ground and grumbling under her breath, "I hope we have to do gay male."

"What?" the Bri-guy asked.

Speaking louder Angel replied, "I hope this is some good tail."

"Oh it is," the Bri-Guy grinned, lining the rectangle of butter up to her ass, then he pushed and Angel shrieked.

"IT'S COLD!" she said accusingly.

"Oh..." the Bri-Guy said, and as she glared at him he rubbed it between his hands to warm it up a bit, covering his hands in a thick spread.

Angel moaned and shook her head. Finally he got himself situated enough and started pressing the stick between her ass cheeks, managing to get quite a bit of the butter in her ass crack and not very much in her ass. The little bit that did push in, did feel very good Angel had to admit. It was slippery and warm and as it melted was a rather interesting sensation.

"Alright," the Bri-Guy said, wiping his hands on his legs. Then he put his hands on her hips and lined up his dick with her crinkled hole and began to push.

Groaning, Angel tried to relax, but then shrieked as he shoved his entire dick with one buttery thrust.

"OW!"

"What?!" The Bri-Guy asked, that hadn't hurt him at all! In fact, it felt wonderfully good!

Angel glared at him over her shoulder, "You can't just shove in, you didn't give me any time at all to adjust!"

"But that's how they do it in the stories!" he protested.

"Maybe you should read less stories and just get more experience." She muttered and then squealed as the Bri-Guy gave her a hard thrust in her tight tush.

"We're IN a story," he reminded her, "And I WOULD have had more experience if SOMEONE hadn't decided to go on a vacation!"

And he punctuated his words with short sharp thrusts that had Angel squealing.

"Now start talking like we're in a story," he said, "Ohhh... Angel, your ass is so tight and hot!"

"Oh baby oh baby," she replied in a completely deadpan voice, "Fuck my tight ass."

The Bri-Guy paused, "Well that wasn't very inspiring."

Angel rolled her eyes, "Give it to me stud, fuck my hershey-highway, oh yeah it feels so naughty to have you in my backdoor, spread that starfish, bang my poop chute, stuff me like a turkey baster."

Shrugging his shoulders, the Bri-Guy decided that he might as well enjoy himself. Reaching around her body, he grabbed onto her hanging tits with buttery hands... and they immediately slipped off. He tried again with the same effect. Angel started giggling at him as he tried for a third time to hold onto her tits, but they were so buttery now from his first few efforts that he couldn't get a proper grip at all.

"Fine, go ahead and giggle," he snarled, and began butt-fucking her with even more force. And then he reached around and began sliding his slippery hand over her slippery pussy... and that DID feel good.

The Bri-Guy was triumphant as the reluctant Angel finally came to life and banged her bodacious ass back against him while he rubbed her clit.

*edit*

She shrieked as she came, her ass tightening down on him and he exploded inside her, proud of himself for having brought her to an mutual amazing orgasm while he fucked her ass.

*edit*

Sorry bout that, Bri-Guy got a hold of the keyboard for a minute.

What ACTUALLY happened was that he creamed her ass way before she was ready to cum and the angry Angel then chased him around her apartment with a new stick of butter. Eventually he managed to get her to calm down and perform some very energetic lip service (during which time Angel find out intimately just where his new horn was - or at least, what part of his body had become a new horn).

(That would be his tongue, in case you didn't get the "Lip Service" thing.)

(Not to say that you wouldn't, but you know, just in case.)

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