The First Time Again

I was sitting in Stumpy's place sipping on a lite beer at the bar when this old fellow came in and sat down on the stool next to me and ordered a beer. He was fairly decent looking and dressed neatly. Actually, he looked to be about my age, but anybody my age is an old fellow.

"Hi, I'm Danny," he said after he took a sip, "it looks like the pickings are pretty poor for finding a sweet young thing around here tonight." He had already looked around at the only other customers, three men in dirty work clothes and greasy cowboy hats and one middle aged woman who looked like she'd been around the block a few times.

"Hello Danny, I'm Jon and it's not a great loss for me," I muttered, kinda thinking out loud, "it's been a few years since I got it up enough to do anything to a sweet young thing or any other woman. Years of high blood pressure medicine pretty well converts the old plumbing from an iron pipe to a rubber tube."

"Hey man, I'm sorry, it must be tough not being able to get it off any more?"

"Well, it can still get off, but only with a helping hand. It just won't get hard enough to push into anything."

"Well Jon, I learned many years ago, there is more than one way to skin a cat. There are other very pleasurable ways to get around a problem like that one." He said as he turned toward me and lay his hand on my leg with his fingers lightly brushing on the inside of my thigh, "If a man is willing to try something different, sex can still be as good as it was when you were twenty one."

"You know, I just might try something different if it would feel like it did when I was twenty one. I can tell you for sure that when you get my age having a helping hand isn't much more pleasurable then taking your first pee every morning."

"Jon, if you really feel that way, why don't you follow me over to my place? We can have a beer and maybe figure out a way to solve your problem."

Danny is in his kitchen now getting us a couple of cold beers and I am sitting here in his big old leather arm chair with those weird thoughts running around in my head, just like they did in the summer of 1947.

All these years later and here I am again, sitting in a strange room, wondering about a man I've just met. When he comes back in, will he call me over in front of him, turn the lamp off, open my zipper and take my dick and play with it for a few minutes, until it gets firm and them take it in his mouth like Paul did back then. If he does it will be the first time any man has touched it since Paul sucked my cherry from my dick.

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It was the summer of 1947. Joe was telling about his newest sexual adventure. "Hey man, I met this guy named Paul, the other night and he invited me over to his place. He took me into this dark bedroom and sat down on something with me standing in front of him. Then he pulled my dick out and played with it until it got so hard I couldn't stand it. Then he sucked it in his mouth and started sucking and scrubbing around the head with his hot tongue. Man, when he seizes your dick with his hot mouth, you are going to cum. Man, you never felt anything that good, It even feels a lot better then doing it to a girl. Besides, you don't have to take him to a movie are spend money on hamburgers."

Listening to Joe's adventure in what was considered a forbidden area back then was very exciting for someone who's dick had never felt anything but my hand. My dick grew hard just listening to the story of Joe being fondled and a hot mouth worrying his dick until it erupted.

Joe made having your dick sucked sound like the most exciting pleasure any teen age boy would ever experience. Listening to Joe, he convinced you that Paul was just a nice guy who enjoyed giving other guys pleasure. Joe had convinced himself a long time before that having your dick sucked did make you queer. Queers were only the guys who sucked someone's dick. It seemed logical

It seemed to make some kind of sense as we sat around talking. The longer Joe talked about how awesome it was to have your dick sucked, the more attractive the idea sounded. Letting Paul do me too became an intense desire. "It's a shame your friend Paul isn't around right now." I said, "I've got a hard on that he could work on right now." I bragged.

"Well", Joe ask, "Would you like to go over to Paul's with me some time?"

"Just let me know when, I'm ready." I replied.

"That's good, I was going over to see Paul for awhile tonight anyhow, do you want to go with me?"

My dick was still hard enough to rule my mind and I wanted more then anything to loose my virginity. "Damn right," I answered, "I'm ready."

My dick wasn't very hard by the time we got in the car. It's influence on my thinking was shrinking also and fear of the unknown begin slowly raising it's ugly head. We were almost there when it finally dawned. I was would be in a room with a real live queer in a few minutes. Maybe tonight wasn't the best time to visit, but hard as I tried, I couldn't figure out a way to back out now.

I was still talking during the short drive, but it was like whistling when you walking past a grave yard at night. I wasn't near as eager to arrive as I had been at Joe's house.

After Joe parked the car we walked up the stairs to Paul's apartment on the second floor where Joe knocked on the door. The young man who opened the apartment door looked to be in his mid twenties, very personable and would have fit into almost any group. "Hi Joe, y'all come on in." Paul said, opening the door back.

"Hi Paul, this is Jon," Joe said as we all found seats in the small living room, "he's a good friend of mine and I thought he would enjoy meeting you." We sat around and made small talk for a few minutes, until suddenly Paul stood up and said, "I'll be back in just a minute, I think I heard a car out front."

Joe stood up a couple of minutes later and said. "I'll be back," and started toward the door where Paul had vanished." "Where are you going," I started, "Paul said he was just going to check on a car and he would be right back?"

"Yeah, I know, but he just motioned for me. He wants to tell me something." Joe said as he left the room.

Is he's gonna do Joe now, I wondered? Naw, probably not. It was quite as I sat there and stared at the gloomy archway into other parts of the apartment where Joe had disappeared. Could Paul be sucking on Joe's dick already, I wondered? That was the moment all kind of weird thoughts began materializing in my head and grow into a big pile of assorted fears. I suddenly realized how little I really knew about what might be happening to me in a few minutes. I mean the actual physical processes, like how did he start, then what was next, you know a step by step description of what this guy actually does to you and what you are supposed to do while he is doing it to you.

Am I really going to have it happen to me tonight, I thought. Can I really let a strange guy do things and suck on my dick until he makes me cum, I wondered sitting there alone.

Actually, just think about it, some guy you've never seen before is sucking your dick into his mouth and doing who knows what to it. It's going to be your first time for any kind of sexual encounter with another person, it's frightening. You would be sticking your only dick into a hole lined with the sharp teeth. How much damage could he do if you made him mad or what if he was just evil? What do they really do to you? Most guys call it a blow job, surely he wouldn't literally blow air into you like a balloon? Do you have to get in a bed with him? Would he try to hug and kisses you? Would he take all your clothes off before he does it to you? Do they put your whole dick in their mouth or just suck the end of it? If you cum in a queer's mouth, would it make you want to be queer too? Did he get sucked off by some guy when he was younger, making him a queer? If the guy gets to excited and sucks really hard on your dick while you're coming can they really suck your balls dry?"

And even worse, can I really let some strange guy mess around with my dick in the first place? What would I do if my dick won't get hard or what if it won't cum? The mental tensions doubled and redoubled with each question that passed through my head until Joe finally appeared in the doorway again.

"Hey Jon, Paul wants to talk to you for a minute. Just go through that door and go into the next room." Joe said as he came back into the living room. I couldn't see any difference at all in Joe's appearance. His clothes weren't mused up or anything.

Maybe Joe really did just talk to Paul about something, I told myself. So maybe I don't have anything to worry about tonight after all.

"Right now?" I ask. I was learning a very important lesson for later life. Be careful what you wish for. You may get it.

"Sure, go on, he isn't going to hurt you in anyway."

I guess it won't hurt to see what he wants, I thought as I finally got up and slowly walked through the gloomy opening into the dining room. The dining room was very gloomy after I passed through the arch. The only light was what leaked through the door from the small living room table lamp. The other room was black inside the next doorway. I figured it was the door to a bed room as I slowly walked toward it. I stopped just inside the doorway, trying to see into the darkness.

"Hi Jon, here I am," Paul's soft voice came reassuringly out of the darkness in front of me, "walk over this way."

I shuffled through the darkness toward the voice, trying to subdue my fear of the unknown and trying to figure out what I was going to say to Paul. I froze when a hand touched my stomach

"Come on up here a little closer," He said as his hand caught my belt and pulled me a step closer, "you don't have to be nervous." I wondered if Joe had told him I was still a virgin. I flinched when his other hand touched my soft dick through the material and caressed it lightly. Somehow his knowing fingers opened my fly and his hand was inside my pants before I knew it was open.

Fingers clutched my soft dick and pulled it out into the open. I just stood there unmoving, like a deer caught in the headlights. This stranger was holding me captive and I couldn't move and now he had my dick was in his hot hand and was fondling it like it was his own.

In spite of the fact that I had voluntarily walked up to him, I definitely wasn't prepared for someone else to have total control my dick. All of my fears flared up again and my dick refused to get more then firm as he fingered it.

My mind was racing overtime, screaming that this guy was jacking me off, but my body was still paralyzed and I stood like a statue while Paul's hot hand fondled and jacked the loose skin back and forth on my poor dick. I was one of those guys whose dick had never been cut. I still had enough foreskin to completely hide the head from view. My mental state was holding me back now, but with Paul steadily jacking it, my dick finally begin to stiffen up, but it still wasn't very hard.

"How come it isn't getting hard?" The soft voice ask from the darkness.

"I think maybe he's just a little bit scared." I managed to stammer.

"Well, we can't have that, we'll just have to show him that there's nothing to be scared of." The voice said soothingly. His hand continued to knead my dick and jack it a little faster with each stroke. His other hand still had a tight grip on my belt so I couldn't back away even when my dick begin reacting to the added stimulation. After a few minutes pleasant new sensations aroused my dick as Paul's expert handling overcame my apprehension and my dick was slowly growing. By now Paul was jacking the loose skin back and forth far enough to expose the head with each stroke. I probably would have cum a long time ago and started on the next one if it hadn't been a stranger's hand.

I figured when Paul finally released it. he was getting impatient at the slow response he was getting and my dick still wasn't fully hard. My self confidence dropped about 99% when I realized that my first sexual encounter with a real person was ending in a major disaster. I would never live it down if Paul told Joe I couldn't get it up.

He still had a grip on my belt when I felt his other hand slide between my legs. That hand got a good hold on the material at the crotch of my pants and he pulled me another step closer. Then the hand holding my belt let go and caught my dick again. I realized that it wasn't over yet when he pulled the loose skin all the way back exposing every nerve ending on the exceptionally sensitive head. The I was surprised when the head of my dick was seized again, but this time it felt different. It was tightly enclosed by something very hot and slimy. That something was caressing the head with a constant movement that filled it with new sensations. The grip on my pant's crotch kept me from retreating and pulled me closer and my dick was totally engulfed. Then I knew, it was in his mouth. My dick was trapped inside his mouth. Ready or not, I was having real sex another person. Maybe not like I had dreamed, but it was real sex.

Now I was scared, I tried to back away, but the hand holding the crotch of my pants held firm and pulled me even closer as the squirming slimy hot wet tongue ruthlessly tormented the virgin head of my dick. After the first few seconds of shock, my dick responded to these new undeniable sensations despite my fears. My almost hard dick quickly grew super hard and I realized that something really awesome was happening to me physically, if not mentally.

About then, I realized that my eyes had been squeezed shut and opened them. I discovered that I could see a little now, even in the dark gloom of the room. I could see we were in a bedroom and Paul was sitting in front of me on a low trunk or chest with his head tight against my crotch. I was even more surprised to see that he was jacking his dick off with his other hand while he was sucking and tormenting mine. I never dreamed guys did that. I guess I just thought his would automatically shoot off on it's own when mine did while he was sucking it.

In some strange and bizarre way, seeing his head bobbing and feeling his mouth completely dominating my dick, and at the same time, seeing him jacking off his own dick created an incredibly strong sexual sensations in my mind. It was like every thing he was doing was wired to my dick. It somehow added a sexual fantasy to the already overwhelming physical sensations that were filling my lower body.

Paul's relentless sucking along with his hot slick tongue stroking the head of my dick was to much to fight. My dick was harder then it had ever been in my life. By now every part of my body was aching with desire.

My whole body was on fire, but then, I begin to feel panicky all over again because now I knew that I was positively about to cum and nothing was going to stop it and I didn't know the rules.

Was I was supposed to signal to Paul in some way or jerk it out of his mouth before it started to cum so it wouldn't get into his mouth or should I just let it flow. My mind fought to stop it from erupting while it was in his mouth, but my body fought harder and my dick begin pulsing by it's self. By now I was standing on tiptoes, pulling back, but the hand at my crotch was pulling me even closer to that hot sucking mouth.

Then I started to cum and forgot all the questions. My dick belonged completely to Paul's insatiable mouth. No questions ask. He could do whatever he wanted to now, as long as long as he didn't stop what he was doing.

I looked down again after my tensions eased. I could see in the dim gloom that Paul still slowly jacking off his own dick while he sucked the last few drops from my own spent dick. He continued to suck as it shrunk, even after it was completely drained. Then his tongue became a torment as well as a pleasure as it worried the ridge around the head of my dick. Each time the tongue touched the ridge now, it caused a strange combination of pain and pleasure. I know now that prolonged stimulation can often causes super-sensitivity right after an orgasm. I began trying to evade each touch, but not to much, because your body still searches for the last fragments of pleasure.

Paul had cooled off by then and my shrinking dick was finally allowed to slip out of his mouth and Paul relaxed the hold on the material at my crotch. "Tell Joe to come back in when you go out." He said.

I knew that was my dismissal and I stuffed my slimy wet dick back in my pants and walked back to the living room alone. The cold sticky saliva and cum that soaked into the front of my shorts was a constant reminder of what had just happened. As we left the apartment the feel of the cold sticky wet spot pressing against my limp dick added to a nagging sense of remorse in the back of my mind

"Well, how do you like getting sucked off?" Joe ask as we walked down the stairs to the outside.

"I didn't even have to think before giving an answer, "I sure beats the heck out of jacking off."

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"Hey Jon, here's your beer." Danny said. "Man you look like you were many miles away from here."

After a couple of sips Danny came up with the big one. "Jon, I'm a little confused about you. Let's start off being straight with each other. Are you gay?"

"No," I burst out immediately

"OK, have you ever had any kind of sexual experience with a man?"

"Yeah . . . one time. You know, you're the first person I ever admitted that to. Many years ago my buddy took me with him, to visit this guy named Paul who lived in an apartment above the old Cozy Cabins motel. That was the night I lost my cherry. Paul's hot wet mouth and tongue tormented my dick relentlessly till it exploded with wave after wave of pure pleasure."

"Was that the old Cozy Cabins on Jensen Drive?"

"Yeah, that's the one. I'm surprised you knew about that place?"

"Yeah, I remember where that old place. I guess the main question now is did you enjoy what he did to you?"

"Well, as I said, it was my first time to have it touched by another person, so it was the best thing I had ever felt when he finally got me off. But, except for that minute or two while I was cuming the rest of it was a kind of traumatic experience. I was standing in front of him in a pitch dark room. He was holding me so I couldn't back away and I was completely ignorant of what to expect. I almost panicked inside with just about every different touch or move he made. I was so petrified, he like to never got it hard. I guess, in a way, you could have called it a voluntary rape."

"Did you ever do go back to see Paul again?"

"No, I met my wife just after that and I never felt the need to look anywhere else again

"Would you still have those fears if you could visit Paul again after all these years?" Danny ask.

"No. . . I know what it's all about now. It would definitely be voluntary without the rape. "

"Excuse me a minute," Danny said, "I think I heard something." He said as he went into the other room.

"Hey Jon, come here a minute, I want to show you something." Danny called a minute later from the other room.

The other room was black inside and I paused in the doorway trying to see into the dark room.

"I'm over here beside the window." Danny's soft voice came reassuringly out of the darkness in front of me. "There isn't anything in between us, come over here and see."

I shuffled through the darkness toward the voice, remembering another day. I stopped and froze when a hand caught my belt and pulled me a step closer. "You don't have to be nervous this time." Danny said softly and almost like magic, my old dick was out and growing a little firmer as his educated fingers begin working it over.