The Humper Games

With apologies to Suzanne Collins

- 1 -

When I wake up, the other side of the bed is warm, the canvas blanket covering only me. Porn must've recently gotten out of bed. I wonder if she's up for the day, or if she had a bad dream and decided to climb into bed with our mother instead. Either is believable. After all, today is the day of the raping.

I prop myself up on one elbow. There's enough light in the window to see them. Porn, my little sister, is sitting on my mom's bed; mom is stroking her long blond hair, whispering to her that everything will be all right. I can't read the expression on Porn's face, which is fresh as a raindrop, as lovely as the pornrose for which she was named. My mother was once sexy too. Or so they tell me.

If I could read lips, I think that my mom is trying to tell Porn that she doesn't have anything to worry about. There are lots of girls here in District 12, and it's only Porn's first year, so...

Let me back up a minute. I'm sure you're wondering what I'm talking about. You see, seventy four years ago, the outlying districts tried to sow discord and unrest against the government. As a part of the Treaty of the Treason, each district must offer up one female and one male between the ages of 21 and 28, in a ceremony called a Raping. The people chosen, called Tributes, will then be taken to Darkview in a televised spectacle of raging hormones and sexual debauchery.

In the Humper Games, it's fuck or be fucked. I'm not entirely sure how they do it, but apparently having an orgasm will cause your heart to seize up and you'll die. With a smile on your face, but you're still out. So you want to get other people to cum but not cum yourself. And you sure as fuck don't want to masturbate, even though there's something in the air that keeps the participants aroused. The last standing male and the last standing female must then have sex with each other, and the final survivor will be rewarded with a modified body. If it's a guy, he'd get a bigger dick and if it's a girl she'd get bigger tits.

I'd be lying if I said I weren't worried for myself or for Porn. Porn's only got her name in that bowl once. My name is in that bowl at least two or three dozen times because I had to get food for my family. I protected Porn as much as I could.

So I stretch and get up, hoping to keep Porn as calm as I can. When we all get together at the table, I tell Porn that the odds are low that she'll get picked. But it's something we've all got to do. My mom silently nods her agreement, wiping a tear from her eye but not saying anything.

After breakfast, we set about to getting dressed. As a part of the whole pageant of the Games, starting with the Raping, we've all got to look far more presentable than we normally have to. There's extra troops from Darkview today to oversee the whole thing.

I can see how nervous Porn is looking so I reach into my pocket and I pull out the small pin I had gotten from one of the old ladies in town and I hand it to her. Porn looks at it and I tell her it's a fuckingjay pin, and it'll bring her good luck and strength. She smiles slightly and places it on her blouse.

The sound of the bell ringing in the center of the district tells us it's time to go down and watch the video of President Blow explaining what this whole thing is about, as if we didn't already know.

- 2 -

My mom starts crying as Porn and I walk out to the town square, hand-in-hand, to be there for the Raping. There've been times when I would've shaken mom to stop crying but I can't blame her this time. Still, looking at her, she's been that way ever since dad died in a mining accident. We in District 12 are a mining town and she's basically pulled away from me and Porn since then, leaving me to keep food on the table in our household. I glare at my mom as we walk out the door, wordlessly telling her to be there, if not for me, then at least for Porn.

Long after Porn and I arrive at the Raping, my mom shows up. Effing Trinket, the diplomat from Darkview to our district, is commanding everyone's attention so I can basically only smile at my mom before the overall ceremony begins.

Effing says, "Welcome, welcome welcome! Happy Humper Games, and may the odds be ever in your favor! Before we begin, we have a very special film, brought to you all the way from Darkview!"

The crowd falls silent as a video is projected onto the wall behind Effing. It shows images of the war that ended seventy four years ago interspersed with images from past years' Humper Games. President Blow narrates the short film: "War. Terrible war. Widows, orphans, a motherless child. This was the uprising that rocked our land. Thirteen districts rebelled against the country that fed them, loved them, gave them orgasms, protected them. Brother turned on brother until nothing remained. And then came the peace. Hard-fought, sorely won. A people rose up from the ashes and a new era was born. But freedom has a cost. When the traitors were defeated, we swore as a nation we would never know this treason again. And so it was decreed that each year, the various districts of Pornem would offer up in tribute one young man and one young woman to fuck to the death in a pageant of hormones, courage, and sacrifice. The lone victor, bathed in riches and given an improved body, would serve as a reminder of our generosity and our forgiveness. This is how we remember our past. This is how we safeguard our future."

The film comes to an end and the music dies down and Effing announces that the time has come to draw the names of the tributes from District 12. "As usual, ladies first!"

She reaches into the bowl and slowly opens up the slip. "Pornrose Everpeen."

I'm in shock. Porn slowly starts to get shuffled into the square and the guards push her forward. I scream out, "Porn!" but can barely hear my own voice.

Without even thinking, I jump out into the center of the square and call out, "I volunteer! I volunteer as a tribute!"

- 3 -

I don't really know how I find my way up to the stage next to Effing Trinket, who seems just as surprised as I am to be here. She asks me my name and I think I say, "Catscratch Everpeen." She tries to make small talk but I can't really think of anything to say. Realizing that I'm not much of a conversationalist, Effing clears her throat and says, "And now for the boys..."

She reaches into the fishbowl with the guys' names and pulls out a slip of paper. She calls out "Beeta Mellick."

I look out into the crowd and see the people standing near Beeta start to move away from him. He's got a shocked look on his face. I imagine I've had a similar look on my face ever since I volunteered to take Porn's place. But nobody's volunteering to take his place, so he slowly finds his way up to me and Effing.

Effing is still bubbly as she tells me and Beeta to shake hands and says, once again, "May the odds be ever in your favor."

The crowds in the square start to disperse and the guards shuffle me and Beeta into a small room. Mom and Porn are waiting for me and we hug each other. I give them advice as to how to get food while I'm away and promise that I'll do everything in my power to make sure I come home safely, albeit with bigger tits. Before they're shuffled away by the guards, Porn gives me back the fuckingjay pin. It's so hard to tell them what I'm thinking and feeling. I'm scared, not just for the games themselves but also what's going to happen to Porn and mom.

I give my sister a big hug and don't want to let go of her. I close my eyes and whisper in her ear. I tell her that I'll do whatever it takes to get home safely. Choking on her own tears she tells me that things will be fine back home while I'm competing in the games.

After a brief moment, the guards pull the two of us apart. "Good luck," Porn calls out to me as they shuffle me through a door and over to a train that will bring me, Beeta, Effing, and Heybitch Abernathy, the only prior victor from District 12, to Darkview.

- 4 -

Heybitch is an interesting guy. He keeps to himself, mostly, in the mansion provided to him by Darkview on account of his having won the Humper Games about twenty years ago. He drinks heavily and I wonder if that's because of his own experience with the Games.

I find my way over to the meal car on the train and Beeta and Heybitch are already sitting at the table, eating. I hear Heybitch talking about trying to get sponsors and I sit down. "So how do you get sponsors?" I ask.

Heybitch ignores me and starts to butter his toast.

I clear my throat and ask again what it takes to get sponsors while I'm out there in the middle of the Games.

When he reaches for the jam, I pick up a knife and drive it into the table right in between his fingers.

Effing, whom I hadn't noticed until this point, scolds me for damaging the wood of the table.

Heybitch smiles at me and says, "You want to know how to get sponsors? You need to get people to like you. And darling, you're not getting off to a very good start."

He picks up the jam and starts to spread it son his toast.

None of us says anything for the remainder of breakfast. After that, we all go off to our own cars to rest and relax.

After Heybitch and Effing disappear, I look at Beeta. I don't think he and I ever spoke much back home, but he's the son of the baker and I remember one time when he was told to throw out some unsold bread from the day and he gave me some bread for my family. He probably never told his father what he did, otherwise he'd have gotten into a lot of trouble. He always seemed nice enough even I don't think he knew my name until now.

That's when he tells me that he doesn't want the Games to change him. I can respect that. I wonder how much of Heybitch's drinking is because he's trying to forget his own experience with the games.

- 5 -

We arrive in Darkview and get shown to our rooms, where we meet our stylists. Mine is a pretty cool guy named Sinna. Sinna tells me that since my district's primary source of income is mining, he tells me that he envisions my outfit when we ride out to the big opening ceremony, I should have an outfit that really represents that.

I don't know why but I just trust him. So I let him take my measurements and he gets to work. I take a look at the schedule leading up to the games: first is the parade, then we all sit to get interviewed by the host, Seizeher Fuckerman. Then we train for the games, leading up to getting ranked by the judges, and then, finally, we go out to participate in the games themselves.

I have to keep reminding myself that so much of this is staged. Heybitch's words, "It's a television show" ring in my ears. I need to get people to sponsor me or I might as well give up now. But I can't give up. I promised Porn.

In almost no time, Sinna returns with a very nice black satin bra and panties. He doesn't say much about them, other than that he did something that'll really impress everyone. Realizing that this is the start of my Humper Games journey, I change into them and head down to the chariot that will transport me and Beeta to the coliseum where Seizeher will interview us each, one by one. Because we're from district 12, Beeta and I will be the last interviews, which means that everyone will be bored and tired by the time we get there.

So Beeta climbs up on the chariot and helps me up after him. I gaze down at his black boxers and think about how he looks good with it. Sinna must've coordinated with his stylist. Beeta smiles at me and I suddenly feel a bit less anxious about all of this. He definitely gets it, the whole pageantry of it all.

I gaze out around at the other chariots and see the tributes from all of the other districts. As the chariot containing the tributes from District 1 starts moving, the crowds watching from the stands start applauding and the roar makes me want to cover my ears. I look at Beeta and I realize that this would be a bad thing.

After what feels like an eternity waiting for the other eleven chariots to start moving, our chariot starts moving. Once we're in the middle of the thoroughfare, he grabs my hand and whispers, "Come on, they'll love it!" He raises my hand and the crowd cheers. Almost immediately after that, my bra and panties, and Beeta's boxers catch fire, leaving a brilliantly orange spurt of flames in our wake. I was a bit shocked by it but I don't feel any actual heat. I try not to betray how scared this makes me feel, but the crowd goes bonkers over it all.

Beeta seems to know exactly how to work a crowd. I'm not sure if I should stay close to him, or be worried about what it means to go up against him in the games.

- 6 -

In the couple of hours after the end of the parade, Sinna works on my hair, makeup, and clothes for the interview with Seizerher Fuckerman, which I'm already dreading. Once i'm in the halter top and miniskirt, Sinna tells me that it's got the same material as the flames I wore when we rode in. I just need to twirl. We have a brief conversation about whether I should, but he reassures me that it'll be fine and that everyone'll love it.

I confess to being nervous about the whole interview, including the flames, and he says that he'll be in the audience. So I just need to look at him and he can help guide me. I'll be towards the end, since first will be the girl from District 1, then the guy from that district, so I'll be next-to-last to be interviewed, only ahead of Beeta.

So all of us tributes are waiting backstage for our time, and Beeta and I get to wait the longest, watching everyone dwindle onstage and then back to their quarters for some rest.

So I finally get up to have my time in the spotlight and Seizeher says something but I'm so anxious, I can barely hear him. I ask him to repeat himself and the whole audience laughs. I take a deep breath and see Sinna in the audience so I start to relax. We talk about Porn and how I volunteered for her as a tribute. How I told her I'd do my damndest to win and come home safely. About the fire as Beeta and I rode in during the parade. That's when I tell him that I'm wearing the flames now.

Sinna nods his approval as I suggest that I can show them off now. Seizeher asks if it's safe and I laugh and say, "Of course it is." The audience howls their approval so I stand up and start twirling. In an instant, the flames start to dance around the hem of my skirt and everyone loves it.

Seizeher thanks me and I go backstage to relax and listen to what Beeta might have to say. Heybitch raises his glass of whiskey to me and says, "Nice job, sweetheart."

Beeta talks about life in District 12. Seizeher asks if he has a girlfriend back home and he looks down and says, "Not really, but there's one girl I like, but I don't think she knew who I am until I got picked."

Seizeher reassures him that if he wins, then he could have that girl back home. That's when I get floored as he says, "I don't think so. She came here with me."

I'm furious. He barely ever talked to me back home and now he's got the gall to say that on national television? Why would he say such a thing?

The moment he goes backstage, I corner him and push him against the wall. Before I can start screaming at him, Heybitch and Effing pull me off of him. I protest against them both, complaining that he made me look weak.

Heybitch says, "He made you look desirable, which in your case, sweetheart, that's not a bad thing."

- 7 -

We spend the next two days training, learning how to defend ourselves, hide, and take out others in hopes of surviving the games. Beeta started out training with me but decides towards the end of the training to go it alone. We're not allowed to fight amongst each other, or to fuck anyone else, simply because there'll be plenty of time for that once the games begin.

There's one last thing we need to do before the games begin, and that's demonstrate our skills to the game master, Sonofabitch Crane, and other judges. After that, we'll all get a ranking from 1 to 12, which can help us get sponsors to help us during the games themselves. As with the interview with Seizeher Fuckerman, district 12 tributes go last.

I've been hiding my skills with a crossbow on purpose, since I don't want to put a giant target on my back but here is where I truly want to let it be known that I'm good at this kind of thing. The judges are all talking amongst themselves and barely pay any attention to me.

I see a bow and a quiver full of dildos, so I take one and aim it straight for the bullseye in the crotch of the archery target. It's a good thing no one's paying attention to me because I'm so nervous, it goes straight between her legs. I missed. Fuck! I never miss.

I turn to look at the judges and I see Sonofabitch grabbing an apple and talking to the person next to him. I grab another dildo and aim it straight at the apple as he brings it to his mouth. I aim for the apple and knock it out of his hand. That got his attention all right. The conversation among everyone stops immediately and they all turn to look at me.

I curtsey and say, "Thank you for your consideration."

Back at my chambers, Effing and Heybitch don't seem to agree on whether what I did was a good thing. She thinks that I was reckless and it reflected badly on District 12. Heybitch, on the other hand, thinks it's brilliant. Either way, we'll know when they announce the scores.

We're all glued to our TV's when Seizeher Fuckerman goes through everyone's scores. The professional tributes from Districts 1 and 2 all got 9's and 10's. Beeta gets an 8, which is great. And then it's my turn. I nearly faint when they announce that I got a score of 11. They must've liked my gumption...

- 8 -

Heybitch advises me and Beeta to try and get some rest; we're going to need it as we go off to the Games in the morning. So I go back to my room, change into a teddy, and go to bed, knowing it might very well be the last time I'll ever wear any clothes. I might as well wear something nice.

I can't honestly say that I get no sleep, since I was pretty tired before I turned in, but I don't get much sleep. At any rate, the night creeps by and as the first light of the new day shines into my window, I'm up and, I guess, as ready as I'm going to get for this one. Time to get naked, I know...

The guards shuttle me and Beeta to a hangar before we board a plane that'll take us to the arena where the games will play out. Heybitch warns us against going for the provisions in the cornucopia at the center because it's just a Roman orgy and it's not worth leaving yourself vulnerable for too long.

Once on board the plane, the guards inject something into our arms. It's both a tracker so that they know exactly where we are, who we're doing, and when we die so they can lift us out. Also in this injection is something that's designed to keep us all aroused. They explain something about how it stimulates just the right parts of our brains, keeping the guys hard and the girls wet.

I can feel my nipples get hard. I'm not so horny that I absolutely need to fuck anyone, at the same time, it makes me willing to screw around with anyone I can get close enough to. It's going to take me a lot of willpower not to go straight for some of these guys.

I look around at the other tributes on the plane and see lots of stiff nipples and hardening cocks. There's one red-haired girl from District 5, with a long narrow face licking her lips as she examines some of the guys on the plane longingly. I never caught her name but I'll call her "Fucksface". I can see by the look in her eyes who she's planning on going after. I can only hope that she's got enough willpower not to cum first.

Then there's Whoo, the girl from District 11. She's Porn's age and she seemed pretty sneaky during the training. I admit it, I liked her when I first saw her. I hope she doesn't go too soon. The guy from District 11, Flesh, looks like he could be her big, overprotective brother.