The Lady and the Cowboy Ch. 04

The excuse I had used yesterday about being ill proved to be useful today, although I doubted I even needed an excuse to lie in bed as I had been doing since I returned from my afternoon with Tripp. I was a train wreck, and everyone could see it.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can get for you?" my mom asked in that sweet, caring voice mothers use when their children are sick.

"Yes, I just want to lie here," I said, half-groaning, wedged between my pillow and the covers of the bed. In all honesty, I would have been content lying there for the rest of my life. I never wanted to get out of bed again, especially while at this ranch, where I could run into Tripp or see him wherever I went. The only safe place I knew to stay was here in the cabin.

I didn't even open the curtain to look outside, as I usually did in the morning. Looking at the ranch, where I had spent the day with him yesterday, would be too difficult. So while my family went out to eat and subsequently enjoy whatever activities they had planned for the day, I wallowed in my own misery and stayed in bed, trying to think about something, anything, but that kiss in the barn.

My mom came back to check on me every hour and she brought me food throughout the day, which I only picked at, having almost completely lost my appetite. Later, Lucy stayed and played a few games of chess with me. My family thought I was still suffering from yesterday's pretend ailment, which consisted of a particularly gnarly headache. Today, I wasn't sure how pretend the headache was. I tried to distract myself by reading, knitting and periodically sleeping when I could. There wasn't a lot to do in a cabin with no computer and no TV... other than think of Tripp. Tripp Carson...

It was around six when my family left for dinner after a long day of god knows what. I knew I should have gone with them. I couldn't very well sit in this cabin for the rest of the trip, hiding under the covers, but I didn't want to see him yet.

His words from yesterday reverberated in my head. I knew he had felt exactly what I had, and I began to think that he may have been right. If I left this ranch at the end of next week without acting on whatever this was between us, I would have 'what ifs' for the rest of my life. What would be worse: being with him and then having to leave him...or leaving after never having been with him at all?

Once I asked myself the question, I was surprised how easily the answer came. Suddenly I didn't just want to see him, I had to see him. I threw the quilt off of me and got out of bed, immediately beginning to pace as soon as my feet hit the floor. Should I go out to the Lodge tonight? Would he be there? Would I be able to talk to him alone? What would I say? I want you? I need you? How do I go about this? What about my family? They thought I was sick. They'd be watching my every move.

I decided to take a shower while trying to collect the screaming thoughts whirling around in my head. Going to the Lodge wouldn't be a good idea. There would be so many people there, and I didn't think I could handle the awkwardness in that kind of setting. Maybe it would be best to wait until tomorrow, when I could seek him out on the ranch. Perhaps then I could simply pull him aside...

Yes, I would wait until tomorrow before confronting him. I didn't want to seem desperate anyway, so wasn't it best to give it a couple of days and at least try and play hard-to-get? I wasn't cooling down however; the more I thought of him, the more I wanted him. Tomorrow might as well have been a thousand years away.

Later, I lay in bed as my family came home from the Lodge. They all came in to check on me before getting ready to go to sleep, asking how I was feeling in their soft, tired voices that were laced with concern. I told them I was doing much better, which seemed to hearten them. If I was going to be going out tomorrow, then I needed them to believe I wasn't sick anymore.

Trying to go to sleep, my eyes were closed as Lucy sat on her bed, brushing through her hair and chatting away. I drowned her out for the most part.

"Lucy, do you mind? I'm trying to get some rest," I said groggily. The quicker I forced myself into unconsciousness, the quicker tomorrow would come.

"Oh...sorry, I guess I should let you sleep. I'm pretty tired myself," she said as she started to get under the covers. "Oh hey, I saw that cute guy at the Lodge tonight."

My ears perked up and suddenly I was hanging on to her every word. There was only one guy at this ranch that Lucy had deemed attractive. "What guy?" I asked, trying to sound sleepy and slightly annoyed, as though I didn't care.

"You know, the hot cowboy from the other day...Tripp, right? Saw him for a few minutes while we were dancing and stuff. He came in looking really pissed off, like he was angry."

My mind raced. I couldn't help but wonder where that anger stemmed from. "So? What's the big deal?" I asked, trying not to give away my interest.

"Well he sat down at the bar and another guy came and sat down next to him. I wasn't watching the whole time cause I was busy talking to this other girl. Her name's Georgette by the way and she's from Georgia. Isn't that funny? Georgette from Georgia! She's sixteen so she's my age, and she was telling me about how..."

"Lucy...what does this have to do with Tripp?" Sometimes I wanted to strangle my sister.

"Oh right! Well the next thing I saw when I looked over was Tripp had the guy by his collar slammed up against the bar, ready to knock the crap out of him. He would have too if Jack Waterman hadn't run over there when he saw it. Tripp stormed out after Mr. Waterman broke it up."

"He must have been pretty upset about something..." I said airily, telling it more to myself than to Lucy.

"Yeah...he looked like he was ready to tear in to anyone who got in his way...kind of like the way Luke was at first when Susan broke up with him."

The image of my brother's angry grief floated into my mind. We couldn't go near him for two weeks after his college girlfriend had broken it off one summer; he would bite off our heads for simply talking to him. Was it our encounter yesterday that had Tripp so angry? The behavior seemed out of character for the carefree, teasing cowboy I had ridden with through the pastures of the ranch.

Lucy chatted a bit more before falling asleep. I didn't hear anything she said as I lay there, feeling as though I had been hit by a semi. Soon, I realized that I wasn't going to be able to rest...I needed to see Tripp, I ached for him. After a half hour, when the room was filled with Lucy's soft snores, I had an idea, but it was risky. At that point though I didn't care, and I grabbed my cell phone off the nightstand and looked at the time. It was around ten, still pretty early. I didn't know if the rest of my family were asleep yet or not. I didn't even know if Tripp would be home at this time. As angry as he'd been, he may have gone off somewhere and gotten drunk for all I knew.

I did know though that I had to do something. I couldn't sit in this bed any longer, but it was extremely difficult trying to get up the courage to get dressed, and walk out of the cabin. The realization came that it wasn't my family I was worried about, it was facing Tripp. In the end, my desperate need to see him won out over my fear.

We both felt the agony of yesterday. I took it out by lying in bed all day, holing myself up in solitaire. He took it out by almost creaming someone who happened to rub him the wrong way. Instinctively, I knew he was going through the same hell I was, especially after the way he watched me run out of the stables yesterday.

Lucy's breathing was heavy with sleep as I tiptoed around the room, slipping a lavender sundress over my head. In the main room, which was empty, I quietly brushed through my hair while checking my appearance in the mirror. I must be crazy, I thought to myself as I softly opened the door and crept out into the cool night. Normally, I might have been cold, but now my face was flushed with the thought of what I was going to do.

Once outside, I briskly walked behind the cabin, and somehow in the dark, I found the creek that Tripp had showed me yesterday. As I followed the water, I tried to calm myself by thinking of what I might say to him. Nothing came to me. What was I doing?

It wasn't a long walk. I don't know whether I was happy or utterly terrified to see light coming from his cabin, confirming he was not only in there, but awake. My heart had been racing since I had stepped out of bed, but now I was sure that it was about to break out of my chest and start running through the grass.

Do it. Do it before you lose your nerve, I told myself harshly as I stood on his porch, my nose all of three inches away from the front door.

Before I knew it, my hand rasped on the wooden entrance to the cabin, probably a little too harshly - a result of the immense amount of adrenaline coursing through my body. As soon as I heard the sound of my fist knocking, I cried inside my head, cursing myself for what I was doing. For a split second, I thought about running. Too late...

The first thing to greet my eyes as the door swung open was a massive amount of rock-hard, bare chest. A light shading of hair ran down the center, only to disappear into a pair of faded jeans that were zipped, but had the top button undone. I was reminded of the first night I saw him, atop his mustang, clad only in boots, jeans and a cowboy hat. What I had seen that night stood before me now in more detail than I could have ever wished for. It was an image that would be branded into my mind forever. I felt a dampness between my legs, and heat spread throughout my entire body.

My eyes traveled upwards and latched onto his, which at first held a look of surprise before turning quizzical, and then finally understanding, after seeing the burning desire in my own gaze. He didn't say anything, but he stepped back a couple feet and moved aside, giving me room to walk into the cabin.

I knew once I entered, there would be no turning back. Knowing what was waiting for me inside though was more than enough to push me through the door. The inside of his cabin looked similar to the one I was staying in, except you could tell that somebody actually lived in it full-time. There was a large fireplace in the center of the room with a big wooly rug in front that covered the hardwood flooring. A small loveseat and a couple of chairs surrounded the lit fire and mantelpiece, which from what I could see held a few framed photos and what looked like a football trophy. The kitchen was to the left as you walked in, and on the right was a large door which I assumed led to the bedroom.

It registered that I was in his cabin, and I grew scared as I turned to him. He was staring at me with a hard look of stark need as he stood against the back of the loveseat, facing away from the fire with his arms crossed. His eyes roamed over me, but I could tell that he was not going to make a move, and was instead going to wait patiently until I made myself clear.

I was the one who had gone there that night, I was the one taking the initiative. I looked at him with a pleading in my eyes, as if begging him not to make me feel this way...as if he could do anything about it.

"I'm going back to California in a week and a half." I blurted it out, not knowing where it had come from. I was more telling it to myself than to him, trying to reason with my emotions.

"Then why are you here tonight?" his voice was steady and hard, yet quiet.

"I...I don't know," I said exasperatedly, turning away from him so that I could clear my head. With him standing only feet away from me and barely dressed I couldn't breathe, let alone think.

"Yes you do," he said behind me, softly.

"No...I...I couldn't sleep." If there was any logic behind my chosen words it completely escaped me.

"Well that makes two of us, California," his voice became lighter. "Would you like a drink?"

"A drink? N..no... I don't want a drink," I became frustrated, not with him but with the situation.

I heard him walk around to one of the chairs and sit down in front of the fire, his gaze still burning on my back. "Perhaps some music then?" I could tell he was beginning to tease me now, playing on my awkwardness and inability to convey my feelings.

I sighed. "I shouldn't be here, I shouldn't have come tonight," my voice expressed my inner-turmoil.

"But you did, and you are here tonight," his tone was suddenly soft and pained. "You need to admit it to yourself, so turn around, look at me, and tell me what you came here for."

I was defeated, but liberated at the same time. He was right. I was here, and there was something that I wanted more than anything I had ever yearned for in my whole life.

Slowly, I turned to look at him, and without breaking the gaze between us, I walked over to the chair that sat across from him in front of the fire. I didn't sit down, but stood in front of the seat, facing him with about eight feet between us. Both of us looked as if we were going to explode at any second. Never in my life had I felt such tension in one room between two people.

"I want you," I whispered in a voice so soft that I doubted he heard me.

"You want me to what?" His gaze was wild and demanding.

"I want you to make love to me." I was surprised at how easily the words came flowing out of me. They seemed to undo him, and he slowly stood with a look of desire in his eyes that promised to devour me.

"Come here, Kira." As he headily whispered my name, I couldn't get into his arms fast enough. Suddenly I was being crushed to him and our mouths met with fervor. His tongue penetrated as his hands roamed up and down my back, and then over my backside, squeezing and gripping handfuls of material from my dress. We were on fire. All I felt was his hard body and bare skin against me, underneath my fingertips.

And then he pulled away and kept me at arm's length as he sat down once again in the chair behind him. "We have to slow down, I don't want to do this too fast. I want to enjoy every second of it." He was breathing hard, his eyes fierce and his body tense and stressed.

I closed my eyes and nodded, knowing how he felt. There would be plenty of time to ravish each other. Right now I needed him to be gentle. I looked down at his pants and saw the huge bulge that I had felt pressed against me just seconds ago. Did I do that to him?

He reached out and took my hands, bringing me to stand in between his parted knees as he sat in the chair. His hands slowly moved up my arms to the tops of my shoulders where they rested for a moment. I tried to control my breathing, tried to stay standing as he seductively brushed along my skin with his fingertips. Then, he moved to grip the straps of my sundress, and in one unbearably slow motion, he peeled the garment off of me, and let it fall to my feet.

The man truly sounded as if he were in pain as I stood there, inches away from him, in my white lace bra and panties. He let out a soft groan between jagged breaths while his eyes roamed my body. Hesitantly, as if not trusting his self control, he reached one hand up to gently cup my breast through the thin barrier. My knees almost gave out. The ache I felt between my legs grew to the point of slight pain.

"Tripp...?" My voice was breathless. I knew what I had to admit to him before we went any further.

"Yes, honey?" He was focused solely on caressing me.

"I...I, um...I'm not...very experienced with this type of thing..." oh god, please don't let him stop.

His fingers lightly moved over the outside of my bra while his eyes held a look of wonder as he softly pressed against my breast. He didn't look up at me until he realized what I was trying to get at.

His eyes went wide. "Are you...are you a...?"

I nodded quickly before he could get the word out. I didn't want to hear him say it. His stare went blank for a moment before he slowly stood, cupping my face. His hands were gentle as he stroked my cheek with his thumb.

"Kira, are you sure you want to do this?" his eyes were cautious waiting for my answer.

"Yes." The fact that he asked showed what a gentleman he was, but I didn't hesitate one second before giving my answer. "Please..." I whispered in agony. "I'll die if you don't..."

That was all he needed to hear before he bent down and latched his mouth upon my neck. I moaned as his lips trailed kisses up under my ear and his tongue found a sensitive area behind the lobe. His hands wove through my hair, and I clung to him.

The next thing I knew, I was being lifted into him arms and carried into the bedroom. His mouth never left mine as he sat down on the edge of the large bed, cradling me against his powerful body like he would a child. I certainly didn't feel like a child though. He held me against him, his hands roaming my back while his tongue delved deeply, tasting my mouth. Sitting on his lap, that hard bulge beneath his jeans teased my soaked panties, driving me crazy. I was glad he was holding me now. I didn't know whether I could support myself at this point, I was so weak with need.

"Grab a hold of my neck," he whispered against my mouth. As soon as I did as he asked, I felt those hands on my back move to unclasp my bra. He stopped kissing me for a moment and stared into my eyes as he slowly slid the straps down my arms, unwinding my limbs from his neck as he did so. My first instinct was to hide myself. I'd never been so exposed before, and part of me was afraid to make myself so vulnerable to this man who seemed to be controlling my every move and thought with his touch. I made an 'x' with my arms over my breasts as the bra fell to the floor.

"No. Don't." His voice was gentle but commanding. "Let me see you, Kira."

Defeated, I lowered my arms as he set me next to him on the bed. His eyes devoured me as he took in my large breasts and pink nipples, which were stiff and aching. Groaning, he lowered his mouth and kissed the very center of my chest while gently holding my back and pushing me down onto the bed.

"I knew this was going to happen from the moment I first saw you in the Lodge," he said breathlessly as he adorned kisses across my body. I remembered the way he had looked at me that first time, like he was looking into my very soul. "I knew then that it was inevitable. That you and I are inevitable." His voice was a heavy, erotic whisper as his lips finally found a sensitive nipple and drew it into his hungry mouth.

I wasn't expecting the intense pleasure that coursed through my body as his tongue lapped over the peaks of my breasts. His head rose and he gave me a small smile as he cupped each one with his hands, delicately thumbing my nipples. I writhed and moaned beneath his touch, and he watched me as one hand then made its way down my body.

"Yesterday was torture," he whispered to me while watching me tremble. "All I could think about was touching you...doing this..." his hand gently cupped my mound over my underwear and his eyes grew wide at finding how wet I was. "Sweet Jesus...I think we have to take these off, sweetheart."

My modesty had completely flown out the window, and I moaned appreciatively when I felt him start to lean over me and slowly remove my panties, which were now reduced to a sopping wet piece of cloth between my quivering thighs. I knew it was coming soon. I needed to be touched there, I would beg for it if I had to.

He let in a sharp intake of breath when my hairless pussy became exposed. The underwear came off quickly, and soon I was completely naked. Tripp grabbed my arms and slid me to the top of the bed, where my head hit a pillow. His hands made their way down my body, caressing my arms, breasts, belly and thighs before taking hold of my knees and prying them open, revealing my throbbing cunt to his gaze. I had never been so exposed before, and I relished in the feeling of giving myself to Tripp in this way. Nothing had ever felt so right.