The New Kid Ch. 08bymusicfreak©
By the time I woke up, it was Saturday afternoon. Even after staying in bed for close to 16 hours, I was still exhausted. The sleep I had wasn't a restful one, with me waking up every hour or so, only to be reminded that whatever happened the previous night was no dream. I felt the cold bed beside me, wishing that Corey were in its place. I got out of bed, telling myself that moping around was only going to make me feel worse. I would get through this and Corey would be nothing more than a face of my past; at least that's what I kept telling myself. On more than one occasion I had the urge to call him, just to see if his phone was turned on but I resisted. I stayed home all day, going about my usual stuff, pretending to myself that I was fine.
Scott and Zack both called me and I acted cheerful enough, not letting on how hurt I was. Scott stopped by later that evening, bringing a pizza along with him. We talked as we ate and I could see the sympathetic look in his eyes but I ignored it acting like nothing had happened the previous night.
"You know he's just being crazy now right?" He asked, clearly wanting to say that for some time since he arrived. I sighed and shook my head. I didn't want to talk about him at that moment. Scott sighed and kept quiet for the rest of the time as we watched TV. I would at least say that his company was a huge comfort. It reminded me that even if things between Corey and I weren't how I hoped would turn out, the world would go on. When it was 9 Scott took his leave. "Take care Kyle." He said and I gave him a small smile. I watched as his car pulled away and I crashed back on my couch looking at my phone, the urge to call again clawing at my insides but I shook my head once again. I would talk to him in school on Monday I told myself.
Sunday came and went much the same as Saturday. I kept myself busy and Scott dropped by that evening. He stayed away from any Corey related topics though, which I appreciated.
Monday rolled around and I honestly thought that I was okay now. I would talk to Corey, reassure him of anything he was unsure of and if he still wanted to break things off after that I wasn't going to stop him. I went to school, knowing that I would finally be able to see Corey. We had a class together that day so he couldn't avoid me even if he tried. Unfortunately, that class was the last of the day. I went to my classes and kept an eye out for Corey, walking down a hall or something but I never saw him. The optimism I felt that morning was slowly seeping away. When time came for my last class of the day, I stopped outside the room and took a deep breath before stepping in. I scanned the faces in the room but didn't see the one I wanted to. The last drop of hope I felt evaporated right there. I sighed and took my seat at the back of the class. I kept waiting, wishing that Corey would walk through the door and apologize to the professor that he was late but he never did.
After class I wanted to just go home and crawl into bed again, to once again think about what might have gone wrong. It was then that I knew why this was affecting me so much. I loved Corey and I knew I would be feeling some sort of sadness to our break up but what was eating me up the most was the lack of closure. I just needed some explanation and I wouldn't be beating myself up so much. It's the same reason I was so hopeful for the day because it was the day that I would get my answers, that closure that I so desperately sought. I was almost to my truck when I heard a familiar voice.
"Kyle!" My mind was so out of it I couldn't place the voice, but at the back of my mind I wished it were Corey's. I turned a little too excitedly and realized that it was Angela. I cursed myself for getting my hopes up.
"Hey Angela. What's up?" I asked.
"What's up? Didn't we agree to hang out today?" She said.
"Oh shit, I completely forgot." I ran a hand over my face. I didn't really feel like doing anything in my current state but I knew I owed Angela better than that.
"Hey you okay? We can reschedule if you want." She said.
"Nah I'm fine. C'mon let's grab something to eat in town. How about that French restaurant in the mall?" I asked, unlocking my truck.
"Sounds good, I'll just go grab my car so you don't have to come back here later." I nodded and hopped into my truck. I was glad Angela was driving as it gave me more time to myself. Time where I wouldn't have to pretend I was fine. I drove to town and headed for the mall, parking my truck in a lot. The mall was quiet today, which was the first good thing to happen all day. I waited for Angela outside the restaurant for a couple of minutes before she appeared. "Shall we?" I nodded and went to the restaurant.
After the waiter brought us to a booth he left us with the menu and left. I looked at the menu even though I wasn't really hungry. I decided on a small salad and waited while Angela decided her order. She asked me of my opinion of what she should eat but I simply shrugged my shoulders, after which I knew I was acting a little too down on myself. I seriously made an effort to keep myself cheerful although it did come off as fake a couple of times. Angela must have noticed too because after dinner she asked me, "Is something bothering you Kyle?"
"No why do you ask?" I lied.
"You just...seem really down. You didn't talk much throughout dinner."
I shrugged my shoulders. "So you wanna catch a movie or something?" I asked, trying to change the subject. Angela looked at me with concern but I ignored it.
She sighed. "How about we rent a movie and head on over to your place?" She suggested. I nodded; glad that I could at least go home, even if Angela was there too. We headed over to the video store and I let her pick out the show, seeing that I was pretty sure I couldn't pay much attention to it if I tried. To my dismay she got a romance comedy. Just what I didn't need, being reminded of my failed relationship and having to pretend to laugh along. We headed back over to my place, Angela trailing in her red sedan behind me as I drove the familiar road home.
When we arrived at my place, I let her in, asking her to get the movie playing while I got us some snacks and drinks. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a few packets of potato chips, avoiding the one Corey had bought for himself. I got a couple of sodas out of the fridge and carried them to the living room. Angela was seated on the couch, the movie had just started and she had her legs crossed underneath herself. I walked over and laid the snacks of the coffee table, which was a complete mess with letters and magazines strewn everywhere. I was however, in no mood to tidy up. I sat down on the couch, put my feet up onto the table and tried to pay attention to the movie but my mind kept wandering to Corey and his absence.
I heard Angela laugh beside me and realized a joke was just said in the movie and I faked a chuckle to make it seem like I was paying attention. I guess I wasn't really convincing since Angela looked over at me and raised an eyebrow. I acted like I didn't notice and kept my eyes on the screen. A few seconds passed before she turned her attention back to the movie, or so I thought. "So I didn't see Corey today?" She asked. I tensed. I didn't want to talk about him, especially when Angela didn't even really know of our relationship.
"So?" I replied, pretending that it wasn't a big deal. Angela opened her mouth and looked like she wanted to say something but she didn't say a thing. "I need to use the bathroom." I said and left for the bathroom, leaving Angela to herself. I locked the bathroom door and leaned over the sink. I needed to pull myself together. With how I was acting, it's no wonder Angela was getting worried, possibly even suspicious. I mean why did she bring Corey up? Does she know? I shook the thoughts away and splashed cold water on my face. I exited and headed back to the living room. Angela was no longer in her previous position; her feet were planted on the floor and her elbows resting on her thighs. As I walked around her I saw that she was reading something in her hand. My eyes widened as I realized what she was reading.
"What are you doing!?" I shouted snatching my test results out from her hands, regretting that I hadn't tidied up when I had the chance. I glared at Angela as she blushed. I mean it wasn't like this was anything I would have minded her seeing but I was a little pissed that she went through my mail. Angela sat there, looking at her hands where the letter used to be. I tossed the letter onto the table and crashed onto the couch. I didn't want to deal with anymore of this.
"What happened?" Angela finally asked after what seemed like a long silence. I hadn't even realized that the movie had been paused.
"What are you talking about?" I asked, exasperation in my tone.
"Corey. I know you two are dating. Don't bother denying it. It's clear you are distraught about something so just tell me." She said. I was shocked. I didn't know if she really did know or was this just some plot of hers to get me to admit it. I figured the former was the truth because I didn't think Angela would go to such lengths just to get me to say it.
"How did you know?" I asked, closing my eyes, feeling some of my anger waning.
"It's not too hard to figure out to be honest. So are you gonna tell me what's bothering you or not?" She asked. I might as well tell her the truth.
"Corey broke up with me, last Friday." I said, my voiced wavering a little bit as I fought for control of my emotions. Angela stayed quiet for a minute, making me wonder what she was thinking about.
"Maybe it's for the best? I don't know Kyle. You shouldn't be beating yourself up so much about this." She said. Anger rose up in me.
"You think I don't know that? You think I want to feel this torn up about this? If I had a choice I would want this to be nothing more than a short casual thing. But it's not okay. I wish I didn't love him, but I do. I fucking love him, and my heart feels like it's been ripped out." I shouted. Angela looked slightly taken aback by my temper but quickly changed her expression. Her eyes glanced back at the letter I threw on the table.
"Does he know?" She asked.
"About everything. That you love him, that you went to get tested." I shook my head. "I'm so sorry Kyle." She apologized, I didn't know what for.
"For what? It wasn't your fault Corey broke up with me." I chuckled, one that had no humour in it but was laced with sadness and malice.
"Yes it was." I sat upright.
"What are you talking about? How could you..." I was cut off by Angela.
"Last Friday, I went to talk to Corey. I had a feeling you two were dating but I needed to be sure. When I questioned him, he didn't deny that you were dating. I got protective of you Kyle. You know I think of you like a brother." She said, I was trying to process everything but there were still the gaps in the story that didn't explain anything. I was about to ask when Angela continued. "Well I could tell that Corey wasn't out, so I told him that you deserved better than a secret relationship."
"You what!?" I shouted, getting onto my feet. I was frustrated to say the least. "Why would you do that? Oh my god that's why he did it." It was all coming to me as I started to pace my living room. Angela had made him doubt himself, something I knew he often did in terms of our relationship. "Angela you just screwed everything up. Oh my god why did you have to do that? Of all things you had to say the one thing that he was so insecure about."
"I'm so sorry Kyle. If I had known your feeling for Corey I wouldn't have done it, but...I was only looking out for you." She said.
I was fuming. "Maybe you shouldn't. I can handle things myself." The regret showed on Angela's face. She looked away from me and trained her eyes back on her hands. I could tell she was sorry for what she had done.
I wanted so badly to be angry with Angela. I was of course, but I knew Angela had the best intentions at heart. Also I learnt from my friendship with Angela that I couldn't stay angry with her for long. Even then I could feel my anger seeping away as I looked at her sorry face. I sighed and sat back down. We both stayed in silence for a good ten minutes. I looked to the TV and saw the paused movie. I reached for the remote and pressed play. Angela looked at me, puzzled.
"We should finish the movie." I deadpanned.
"I'm really sorry Kyle. I would totally understand if you hate me." She said, making me sigh once again.
"I don't hate you. I'm still peeved with you but I understand where you're coming from."
"I swear I'll try to fix this. It' the only way to make it up to you." She said, making me laugh cynically.
"Well I'd love to see you try. I don't even know where he is and I can't contact him, so I appreciate the offer but I think you can't do much." Angela didn't say anything in return and kept quiet turning back to the movie. Now that I knew why Corey had broken up with me, I wasn't so torn anymore. I was however, more determined to reach him. I needed to tell him that everything Angela said is not important because I wasn't going anywhere. I looked at my phone sitting on the table but decided that it could wait till after Angela left. I didn't know when I fell asleep but it was an hour later when Angela shook me awake. I looked at the TV and realized the movie was over.
"Hey Kyle, I'm heading off." She said, hovering over my half asleep state.
"Oh yeah sure." I said, getting up and stretching a little.
"Again I'm sorry and I will swear I will make this right, even if I die trying." She said as she walked to the door.
"Yeah sure Angela. Bye." I said as she opened the door and left. I heard her car start and make it's way away from my house. I picked up my phone and dialled Corey's number. Once again it went to voicemail, which I wasn't really surprised. "Hey Corey, Angela told me what happened. I need to tell you that whatever she said isn't true. You know I would have waited for you. Hell I told you I would have waited a year when we first got together. Just call me when you get this. I miss you. Bye." I said, ending the call. I hoped that he would get that message and call me as soon as possible.
I got ready for bed and for once since Friday, I didn't fall asleep wishing that I didn't have to wake up the next day. I got a good enough sleep that night, a good thing seeing that I had to really try to get Corey back at all costs. After getting ready that morning I knew I had to call Zack at least. We said we would tell each other if we found out anything and I felt obligated to tell him. I dialled his number and waited for an answer.
"Hello?" Zack whispered, barely audible.
"Dude I'm in class now. Can I call you back?" He whispered. It had completely slipped my mind that he should have been in class.
"Oh sorry. Yeah sure." I said and hung up. I contemplated just texted him the details but thought against it. I sat in my kitchen, holding a cup of coffee in my hand. It was a quarter to 10 and I needed to be heading to school soon. I downed the rest of my coffee, grabbed my stuff and headed out the door. I was a little early but I thought I would give Scott a visit. I wasn't even sure if he was in. I stopped outside the dorms and headed towards his room. I knocked, waiting for a reply. There wasn't any so I tried once more, just for good measure. Still no response so I figured he wasn't in. I turned just as the door opened and there stood Scoot, hair a mess from sleep.
"Oh hey dude." He said, rubbing his eyes. "What are you doing here?" He moved aside and allowed me to enter. I looked over at the made sheets of Corey's bed and immediately started to miss him again. I sat down on it and ran my hand over the smooth cotton.
"Just thought I'd drop by. I have some news about Corey." At the mention of the name, Scott's eyes shot open, alert immediately.
"No way. What did you find out?" He asked, taking a seat on his bed across from me.
"Well I found out that Angela knew about our relationship, and she kinda told Corey some things?" I started
"Wait. Who's Angela?" He asked. I forgot that Scott didn't know who Angela was seeing that we didn't share any classes.
"She's my friend but we didn't tell her about our relationship. So anyway, she said some things that probably made Corey doubt our relationship. So he left. That's as much as I can gather. I mean I don't really know his perspective on the matter."
"Hmm. Well I guess that's something you have to ask him about then, that is if he shows up. He's been pretty much M.I.A. but you probably already knew that. So this Angela, you mad at her?" He asked.
"Well yeah a little but I understand why she did it. She's sorry and she can't change what's already happened. Besides, she didn't ask Corey to leave. She just nudged him a little. He made the decision himself." I said.
"So you're angry with him then." Scott deadpanned. What he said struck me. I was angry with Corey.
"Well a little. I mean just leaving? That's a little cold don't you think. He could've talked to me, or you. Hell he could've even talk to his family. He isn't exactly a closet case anymore if you think about it." I said. Scott chuckled.
"Yeah well, he'll show up eventually. Then you can give him a piece of your mind. I'll sure as hell be giving him one. I always thought Corey was smart but this is just about the stupidest thing he's ever done." I laughed.
"I still miss him though." I said, placing his pillow on my lap and running my hands over it.
"And I'm sure he's missing you. I never told either of you this but I could tell that whenever you two were together, that you guys were happy."
"More than I have ever felt..." I said.