The Taking of Lena Ch. 10

"Ava...my apologies for the unceremonious circumstances of my visit," Renz began. Ava continued to stare at him, her pale eyes hard and unblinking.

"I care very little about ceremony, Herr Wolfenbarger. Especially given the circumstance. Can you or can you not tell me where my husband is?" she said.

Renz took several deep breaths, delaying what he knew would be an unpleasant conversation. There was simply no easy way he could inform Ava that he'd killed her husband.

Renz also felt sorry for Ava, for her tiredness and apparent distress truly betrayed how pretty she really was. She was a far cry from the fashionable debutante he'd briefly met many years prior. It appeared that being married to his younger brother had aged her quite ungracefully.

"Your husband is dead, Ava," Renz said quietly.

Her pale eyes slightly widened, and her thin, bloodless lips parted in a silent gasp.

"You killed Ludovic," she said, lips slightly trembling. Renz lowered his head and nodded slowly.

"Yes, Ava," Renz replied.

A loud shriek suddenly filled the room, and Renz stared in horror as he watched his brother's wife come apart before him. The shift started with her eyes, once previously sharp and focused gradually became wide and manic. Her rouged cheeks expanded and lined, drawing attention to the wrinkles and circles of exhaustion around her mouth and eyes.

Her shoulders began to shake, and it was only a few moments before Ava fell forward onto the table, shattering pieces of fine china. Her cries echoed throughout the high ceiling of the parlor, and she was so loud that Renz was sure that she would soon shatter windows.

He tried to remain as still as possible when Ava suddenly stood up, and flung her arm across the table, destroying what little remained of the china.

"Ava...Ava I am very sorry," Renz said carefully.

But she didn't appear to have heard him. She continued her violent, tear-filled fit, destroying everything in her path. Renz wondered if she intended to try and destroy him as well.

He realized with grave fear that Ava intended to harm herself instead. She reached for a jeweled saber that sat, proudly glistening, at the base of a highly polished fashion shield against a wall. She held it in front of her body, and Renz began to fear for the baby that was resting inside of her highly rounded stomach. He became suddenly overwhelmed with a dark memory of Ilise, after she'd killed their child. He couldn't bear the thought of another innocent, unborn Wolfenbarger's destruction at the hands of a rage-filled wife.

"Ava don't!" Renz exclaimed. He ran towards her and gripped the weapon's handle firmly. He had the stronger grip, but Ava seemed determined to not let go.

"Ava...I understand you're devastated—"

"Devastated? Whoever said I am devastated?" Ava asked incredulously.

Renz slightly loosened his grip on the handle of the blade and observed Ava. In truth, she didn't appear devastated at all. She appeared utterly, and manically, euphoric.

"Aren't you...your husband is dead, Ava," Renz said slowly. Ava's eyes widened and rounded even further, and then she began to laugh hysterically.

"Oh, I know! And I am...ecstatic!" Ava exclaimed, yanking away the sword. Renz watched her in alarm as she took the sword in her surprisingly strong arms, despite her fragile condition. She began to enthusiastically swing it around, knocking over candlesticks and shredding portraits and tapestries in her path.

"I am finally free of that...animal!" Ava cried heartily, suddenly flinging the sword away from her body. Renz ducked and slightly retreated to avoid being impaled, and it was then that Ava finally broke from her hyperactive, euphoric fit.

Renz watched her cautiously as she slowly composed herself, breathing hard. She slightly pulled at her long, loosely curled blonde hair, which had wildly fallen in large, web-like tangles.

"Forgive my outburst, Herr Wolfenbarger...won't you please sit down?" she asked softly.

Renz kept his wary gaze on her as he slowly took the furthest seat from her.

"Are you ill, Ava?" Renz asked softly. Ava shook her head and lightly fanned herself as her panting began to subside. Her pale skin was colored by bright red flush on her face and neck, and damp strands of blonde hair clung to her cheeks.

"Heavens, no. This news has brought on quite good health. Although now that I am a widow, I wouldn't mind meeting that handsome doctor friend of yours again. Has he married yet?" she asked.

Renz frowned, confused, and distantly frightened, by her odd displays of behavior.

Ava sat down at the table again and began to absently pick at the spilled sandwiches and cakes. Her face remained flustered, tears mixing dramatically with her rouge, and her clothes were highly disordered. But her eyes were peaceful, and her posture perfect. The poised woman had returned.

"This...really isn't how I expected you to react," Renz said slowly, still unsure if she would have another outburst. Ava smiled widely and softly sighed.

"I couldn't contain my joy, Herr Wolfenbarger. I have been praying for years to be rid of that man," Ava said, bringing her hands fondly to her swollen stomach.

"You know of his...businesses then," Renz said. Ava's smile slightly faded, but she continued to stroke her belly softly.

"A wife knows all things about her husband in due time. What I don't know is how you're involved in all of this...I didn't even know you two were in contact," Ava mentioned. Her voice returned to that soft, slightly husky quality then, almost as if she were casually discussing things of ease and joy. Ava's demeanor shifts truly were perplexing.

"We weren't. He kidnapped the woman that I love...and brought her underground. He nearly killed her," Renz said. He clenched his fist tightly against his knee as a dark rage began to spread through his chest. Two shots simply weren't enough for what his brother did to Lena.

Ava paused her gentle strokes of her stomach and gazed at Renz sympathetically.

"Was she badly injured? Pregnant? Diseased?" she asked softly. Renz sighed, trying to keep his jaw from twitching angrily.

"I brought her to Schloss Wolfenbarger. Karl and his staff are caring for her. He tells me her recovery is strong," Renz said.

Ava's gaze slightly narrowed suspiciously.

"But you do not believe him? Why don't you go and see for yourself?" Ava asked.

Renz frowned and slightly rubbed his temples. Staying away from Lena while she healed was the strongest test of willpower he'd ever been forced to endure. As desperate as he was to see her, to care for her himself, he knew that she would have no chance of recovering if he were near. Lena needed time to recover, among people who had never, and would never, hurt her.

And while Karl's reports on Lena's health had been positive, Renz had a feeling that the optimism was merely for his benefit. Lena had been near death when he'd found her in the brothel, so thin and beaten and sick. And those were just her physical wounds. Renz felt ill with fury and fear at the thought of the damage brought upon her by the sick lusts of Aleksandr's clients, or even Aleksandr himself.

Renz took several large gulps of black coffee in an attempt to keep that fear from destroying him, for the moment.

"I wanted to see you first...to offer you anything you may need. Our relations have been strained...but I would like us to bear some resemblance to family," Renz said.

Ava appeared confused for several moments, but then her wide smile dominated her face once more.

"If it's money you mean, I will be quite healthy. I certainly did not enter this marriage penniless. But there is something you can help with," Ava mentioned, voice slightly dropping.

She scooted close to Renz after finishing off a small cake, and she darted her eyes around the parlor, to be certain no one was near.

"What is it, Ava?" Renz asked.

Ava slightly lowered her eyes to her belly, and then looked at Renz determinedly.

"I have no interest in expressing any kind of fake mourning for my husband. I look dreadful in black. But I also do not want to rouse suspicion. But if we were to leave München for a grieving holiday, and stay with family, perhaps in a large castle up north, after the babe is born, which will be any day now..."

Ava smiled gleefully, and Renz couldn't help but faintly smile himself. Despite her tired face, her joy was apparent. This was the lovely Ava he recognized. Ava was shameless.

"I'll send for you all once the baby arrives," Renz replied.

****** ******

As promised, Karl had left her alone for the rest of the day, under the condition that she return to bed at sundown. After her positive report on health, Lena had been given full permission to move about Schloss Wolfenbarger to practice using her muscles and rebuilding her strength. Lena knew she should have been delighted, but as the day progressed, she felt increasingly forlorn and ashamed.

There was no denying anymore that she felt strongly for Renz. And it wasn't just his body that she craved. She missed his thoughts and she missed his laughter, for those were the only memories that kept her from going to a point of misery from which there would be no return during her time in Aleksandr's brothel.

But Lena simply couldn't bear the thought of sharing Renz with another woman.

Lena tossed in bed that night, trying her hardest to maintain some kind of anger for Renz. She tried to think of all of the things that she was certain she hated in him, in a vain attempt to ease the pain of the decision she knew she had to make. Now that she was healthy, she needed to leave Schloss Wolfenbarger. And this time, it needed to be permanent.

She thought of those cruel words he'd spat at her when she'd left the first time. Her heart slightly ached at the memory of Renz's hurt, angered face, but she couldn't reignite any hostile feelings towards him. The most powerful feeling that memory brought on was guilt, for the angry words that she'd left him with.

She thought of how devastated she'd been when she was forced out of Sterling Manor because of Renz, and Lena was finally able to rouse some kind of anger. Unfortunately, it was not anger directed towards Renz. The longer she thought about her banishment, the angrier she felt for Master Sterling and Marie. How could they banish her, without allowing her to defend herself? Hadn't she proven her loyalty in the eighteen years that she'd lived and worked there?

Lena shook her head against her pillow, not wanting to spoil her happy memories of Marie and Master Sterling with her forced attempts at anger. She went back to that first encounter with Renz, that night he'd stolen her virginity, had taken advantage of her. Surely she could become angry about that. Surely she could hate the man that had forced his way into her body.

But the memory of that night still didn't trigger any angry feelings towards her gray-eyed ravisher. Because as terrified as she'd been, as inexperienced as she'd been...Lena knew that she could never truly wish that it hadn't happened. Lena wanted to keep all of her memories of Renz, including the painful ones.

The realization chilled her, and Lena quickly stood out of bed, and silently tiptoed out of her suite. There was something wrong with her...there had to be something wrong with her. She was grateful to Renz for saving her from Aleksandr, but that didn't change anything about the dynamics between them. He was a married man now, and she would not be his whore. He hadn't allowed her to come to him on her own. He'd forced her. It was perverse of her to crave him the way that she did.

Lena walked through the halls of Schloss Wolfenbarger, committing the beautiful estate to memory one last time. A part of her wished that she could say good-bye to Renz, but Lena knew that she would come apart if she saw him again. Leaving at night, undetected, and before he returned with his new bride, was best.

But as much as Lena willed her body to begin traveling down the stairs to the grand entryway, her legs remained welded to the landing. She tried to force her body forward, but her heart jolted in an odd tremor of sudden panic.

Lena sighed heavily and began walking upstairs, to the highest floor. The higher she climbed, the more the panic faded. And by the time she entered Renz's private suite, Lena was overcome with a sense of calm and yearning.

She slowly walked through the wide lounge, everything still perfectly undisturbed. Renz's private, open world. She lightly ran her fingertips along various surfaces, wondering absently how often they were touched by him. She wanted to say goodbye to Renz, and this was the only way that she safely could.

Lena walked over to his bedroom double doors and slightly pushed, and the feeling of longing intensified as she viewed his large, pristinely made bed. Lena felt tears begin to well in her eyes as she walked towards it, and slowly crawled on top of the luxurious sheets. She'd never again spend a night in bed with Renz. She'd never bury herself in his large, warm body.

The thought of saying goodbye left her heartbroken and full of sorrow, but Lena knew it was the right decision. She couldn't be his whore, and she especially couldn't be his prey. But this was the last night she'd have anything to do with Renz, and she wanted to spend it with him, even if he wasn't truly there.

"Lena?"

Lena slowly pushed herself off of the bed on shaky elbows. Surely she hadn't just heard his voice. She was certain she'd fallen asleep, and was having another vivid dream.

"Lena," he said again, his voice much clearer.

Lena fully sat up, and began squinting through the thick darkness of the room, faintly illuminated by moonlight.

She saw him emerge from a lounge in a far corner against one of the tall, wide windows, a lovely dark blue cushion that was completely enveloped in the soft shine of the moon and stars.

Renz walked very slowly towards her, almost as if he were afraid of her. And Lena felt her heart race as more of his form came into vision. She tried to regain some of her focus, and remember what her goal had been...but she couldn't think while looking at him. He was more handsome than she'd remembered.

"How are you feeling, Lena?" Renz asked softly. Lena eyed him, still speechless, as he carefully sat down on the ottoman below the bed. From where she was kneeling at the foot of the bed, they were nearly eye level with each other.

"Much better...thank you," Lena said eventually.

Renz smiled slightly, lips curving seductively, and Lena felt her head begin to pulse from her racing heart. It shamed her to admit, but in spite of everything, Lena was entirely dazzled by his handsomeness.

And he was giving her that look again...that look of a man in awe.

"Your recovery...is astounding," Renz said.

Lena fought hard to tear her eyes away from his face, and regain some small bit of dignity and purpose.

"Perhaps I am stronger than I appear," Lena replied. She kept her eyes focused on the view from the window as she felt Renz slightly moving towards her. She could already feel her body reacting to his increasingly close proximity, her skin tingling and goosebumps blemishing as her senses faintly detected his body heat.

"I have no doubt of that," Renz replied.

Lena slightly jumped when she felt his large, warm hand suddenly cover her icy, clenched fist, and she was filled with a rush of joy, and heartache.

"I was terrified I'd lost you," Renz said softly. She could hear the pain and sincere fear in his voice, and that pulled on her sensitive heart even more. Insistent eddies of anger began to build as Lena wondered how he could toy with her like this, while being married to another woman.

It took the force of her entire body, but Lena managed to yank her hand away from his.

"When will you understand that I am not your whore to keep?" Lena asked angrily. The look of shock made her briefly pause, but then she saw Renz frown. Surely he was getting angry. If he was upset, that would make it easier for her to leave.

But instead of an outburst, Renz lowered and shook his head.

"I have never, ever thought of you as a whore Lena," Renz said. His voice was low and serious, with no traces of the arrogance and playfulness that Lena had grown accustomed to. His voice was entirely solemn, and it surprised and scared her.

"What would I be then? The mistress to a married man?" Lena demanded. She could hear her voice rising, and it sounded foreign, not quite her own.

She saw Renz's broad shoulders rise and fall with a heavy sigh. She could see him clenching his fists, and Lena knew that his anger was coming. She'd successfully provoked him. If she could start a fight, she could leave with the same ease she had the first time.

But again, Renz didn't release his anger.

"Lena...I am not married or engaged. I was not lying to you when I told you the first time. And I was not lying to you when I told you I love you," Renz said.

Lena felt her anger come to a sudden halt as those words were uttered, and she was surprised by how inclined she was to believe them. His expression was so focused and open, mystery gone and transparency gained. Lena knew that she was staring at Renz...all of him. And it awed and terrified her.

Her tears began to freely fall as she prepared to utter the words that she knew for certain would remove his control of his anger. She couldn't trust Renz, and she couldn't trust herself around him.

"You can't love...you're nothing but a rapist," Lena whispered.

She braced herself for the aggressive outburst, shoulders slightly shrinking and ears tensing. She lowered her head and sank towards her center, but she was only met with silence.

Lena tentatively raised her head, and she was heartbroken when she realized how...hurt he appeared. It was far more intense and poignant than when she'd left him the first time, and Lena began regretting the words. She knew by his sad gray eyes that she wasn't going to get a fight out of him. She wasn't going to experience the powerful, dominant Renz tonight. She was going to experience yet another new part of him, a raw, honest, and sorrowful part, that she was completely unprepared to handle.

"I'm so sorry, Lena," he said lowly.

She felt his fingertips on her hand again, and that touch, with those words, was all she needed to lose the war she'd been battling within herself. She couldn't force herself to be angry with Renz anymore than she could force herself not to care for him. There wasn't a single part of her body or heart that didn't crave him.

"You love me?" she asked, nearly a whisper. Renz sadly smiled and nodded. He slowly brought his hand to her face, and tenderly wiped her tears.

"You've been the center of my world since that very first night we met. Surely you realize that now," Renz said, slightly gesturing to the shoulder that had been shot.

Lena tentatively reached for him, and gently ran her fingers on his cloth-covered wound. She could feel Renz's body tense as she came near, but he relaxed once she repeated those same, gentle strokes she'd left on his back that night in Berlin.

"You love me," Lena said again, slightly testing the words. They felt overwhelming and frightening, but also powerful and glorious.

"With everything that I am and everything that I hope to be," Renz replied.

Lena brought her eyes directly to his, and she felt captivated by his serious gaze. She felt hot moisture begin to spill from her eyes and run down her flushed cheeks and onto his hand, but she couldn't pay much attention. She was utterly entranced by this new version of Renz, this fully unconcealed version of him.