Trailing Home Ch. 06

Liam heaved a deep sigh and pulled her against his chest. Her head rested beneath his chin, and he stared up into the dawning sky, stroking her hair as he continued. It was easier to talk rationally when he didn't see her tear-streaked face.

"Selena, when I went to the creek last night, I was rushing to bathe so I could return to you. My God, I've been crazy with lust for you, and you had finally promised to be mine. I could think of nothing else but hurrying back. But when I was done and I started out of the creek, Natasha was there. She had come while I was bathing, and I didn't know. I asked her to leave so I could get out, but instead, she undressed and came to me. Selena, I know it sounds unbelievable. I could barely believe it myself, but she literally threw herself at me. Before I could peel her off, you came and saw us together." Liam grasped her shoulders and held her at arm's length to stare into her eyes. "Selena, I swear to you, that's what happened."

Selena stared back at him for a long time, wanting desperately to believe what he was saying. "I don't know, Liam. I just don't know what to believe."

"I can understand that," he whispered. His eyes pleaded with her. "All I'm asking is that you don't shut me out. I'm begging you to trust me and trust your own intuition. You've told me before that you have a knack for seeing how people really are. Don't you know me by now? Don't you know I would never do anything to hurt you?"

Selena's confusion was apparent, and she frowned up at him. "I don't know," she said again. She looked down at her lap. "I need some time to think."

"I'll give you whatever time you need," Liam's rueful snort surprised her and she looked at him to see a resigned smile on his face. "I pray that you don't take too long to decide, because I just might die from wanting you." He was gratified to see the barest hint of a smile on her lips. "Take your time and trust your heart. I hope you'll realize that you can trust me too."

Selena scanned his face seeing only honest sincerity in his eyes. Just moments before, she had felt dead inside, but now her heart was soaring with hope. Could it be possible that she was wrong? Her mind hung back, still doubtful. She didn't want to be a fool. She gave a small nod before looking back down at her lap.

"Alright, Liam. I'll think about everything."

"Thank you," he murmured. He lifted her hand to place a kiss on the backs of her fingers, and his eyes glowed with a strange light when they met hers. "I'll be waiting."

Selena rose from his lap and cleared the dishes. They had to hurry to pack up their gear, as most of the other families were already starting to leave. Liam lifted her to the seat, as he had done dozens of times in the past, and they started their daily journey. Sitting beside him, Selena was more keenly aware than usual of his leg brushing hers, his shoulder rubbing against her. She desperately wanted to believe him. Her entire happiness depended on it.

************

They reached a wide river around lunch time, and they stopped for the noon meal. They had already crossed a number of smaller rivers, but this one was swollen from the recent rains, and the fast moving current posed a problem. The men discussed the best place to cross, and lunch was rushed because everyone knew that getting across could take them a while.

The wagons crossed one at a time, and while the water was deep, the current didn't seem to cause too much difficulty for the teams. The beds of the wagons were watertight, so even though the water came up to the sides, it wasn't too deep for the oxen to swim to the other side.

Several wagons had already crossed, including the Boyds' by the time it was Liam and Selena's turn. The oxen waded into the water and began to swim. Selena clutched the side of the bench as the water level steadily rose, but since Liam showed no alarm, she trusted that they would be fine. It seemed to take forever, but the oxen eventually began to get their footing on the opposite bank. Liam and Selena heard shouts from the people who had already crossed, and they looked up just in time to see a dead tree come floating down the river to crash into the side of their wagon.

The impact was enough to knock Selena off the bench, and her arms flailed in the air as she tumbled into the river. She struggled against the current and the weight of her skirts, and she surfaced a good thirty feet away. She thrashed in the water and looked up in time to see Liam anxiously searching for her. He spotted her and dove in after her just as she was pulled under once more by the sucking currents. Selena kicked and paddled to break free of the water's grip. The tree that had struck them floated past the wagon, and just as Selena managed to break the surface, it slammed into her.

Liam watched in horror as she sank beneath the tree, and he frantically swam the last few feet to where he had seen her last. He dove under the water, groping through the murky depths until his lungs were burning for air. He kicked to the surface and grabbed another breath before diving again. His hand brushed something that felt like cloth, and he snatched it. To his immense relief, it was Selena's dress. He dragged her to the surface and held her in the crook of his arm, making sure her head was clear of the water as he battled against the current. His feet struck the bank, and he carried Selena onto the grass. He wasn't sure if she was alive or dead, for she was completely still. Blood was streaming down the side of her face from a deep gash near her temple, and her skin was deathly pale.

"Noo!" he screamed, feeling for a pulse. He felt a flutter of a heartbeat beneath her jaw, and he turned her on her stomach, massaging her back to force out the water she had swallowed.

Marcia and Gerald came running, and Marcia was sobbing as she knelt beside him. "Is she alive? Please God, let her be alright."

"I don't know," Liam moaned. "I can't tell if she's breathing."

As he said the words, Selena coughed up some water, but she remained unconscious.

"Bring her to our wagon," Marcia cried, hurrying to fetch their medical kit. "We've got to stop that bleeding."

Liam lifted Selena in his arms and ran to Marcia's wagon. She placed a blanket on the ground, and he gently laid Selena on it, drawing another blanket over her. Marcia frantically dug through the medical supplies.

"Gerald, quickly set up Liam's tent. We need some privacy to get her out of these wet clothes. Liam, give him the tent and fetch her something dry to wear."

Liam didn't want to leave Selena, but he knew they had to get her dry before she caught a chill that would further sap her strength. He hadn't given a thought to the wagon since he had jumped in the river to save Selena, but he was relieved that Gerald had grabbed the lead harness and led the oxen the rest of the way out. Liam gave Gerald the tent and snatched Selena's suitcase before running back to her side.

Liam knelt beside Selena, brushing her soaked hair back from her face. She was so still. He felt his heart tighten with dread, but he pushed back his fear and concentrated on trying to help. Marcia poured whiskey over the gash, and used a clean cloth to clean off the blood. She placed another cloth over the wound and asked Liam to keep pressure on it to stop the bleeding.

It seemed to take forever, but the bleeding finally stopped. By then, Marcia had a needle and a length of catgut ready, and she quickly and efficiently stitched up the jagged wound. Selena never stirred, and that scared Liam more than he cared to admit. He could feel a faint pulse and her breath was soft as butterfly wings on his hand. By the time Marcia was finished, Gerald had the tent erected, and Marcia went to make a dry pallet for Selena.

Liam carried her inside and cradled her on his own lap as he stripped off her wet clothes. He laid her on the blanket and dressed her in a clean nightgown, then covered her with two more warm blankets.

Marcia looked up at him, and her voice was gentle when she spoke. "Liam, you should go change into some dry clothes. I'll stay here until you get back."

"Will she be alright?" he asked.

Marcia could see the love and anguish in his face as he stared down at his wife. "I hope so, Liam. We'll do everything we can. Now go."

Liam rushed to change clothes, and Gerald helped him unhitch the team. Liam returned to the tent, but Selena was still unconscious. He brushed her wet hair back, and her skin was cold beneath his hand. "She's so cold," he whispered.

Marcia touched his arm as she rose. "Stay with her and try to keep her warm. I'm going to make some soup and I'll bring some for her. Hopefully by then, she will wake up."

Liam lifted the blankets and lay down beside Selena, gathering her against his chest. He tucked the blankets close around them both, using his own body heat to warm her. His throat felt sore as he choked back tears. He didn't know what he would do if she died. He squeezed his eyes shut against the thought.

He held her like that for most of the afternoon and into the evening. Although she gradually warmed, she didn't rouse, and his worry grew. When Marcia brought the soup, Liam couldn't eat any of it, and she said she would keep it warm in case Selena woke up. Liam sat with her throughout the night, but still, there was no change. In the morning, he rushed to tend to the animals before returning to her side.

"Can I come in?" Marcia called. Hearing his murmured reply, she entered with a cup of coffee and a plate of food. "I brought you some breakfast." Seeing that he didn't look interested in the food, she squeezed his shoulder. "Come on now, you have to eat. She's depending on you."

Liam heaved a sigh. "Thank you," he said, taking the plate. He choked down the food and washed it down with the coffee before handing the dishes back to her. "I'd give my right arm for a doctor right about now," he muttered.

"I know, but we just have to hope for the best. I just know in my heart that she'll come out of this. You have to believe that."

"I'm trying." Liam's voice sounded flat and defeated, but Marcia could find no other words to reassure him.

"I'll be back in a while," she said softly before leaving them alone once more.

Liam hung his head between his knees, running his hands through his hair. Why did this have to happen to her? If one of them had to be hurt, he wished it had been him. The faintest sound brought his head up with a jerk. He knelt to look closer and saw Selena's eyelashes flutter. Liam's heart leapt with joy, and he clasped her hand in his.

"Wake up, my love. Wake up," Liam whispered hoarsely.

Selena's lashes fluttered again, and he could just make out the tiny slits of her eyes. She moaned weakly and closed her eyes again, but his heart soared.

"Wake up, Selena. I need you, sweetheart. Please wake up."

Selena moaned again, and her eyes opened slowly. She tried to focus, but everything looked blurry and indistinct. She blinked several times and moaned against the throbbing pain in her head.

Liam squeezed her hand and gently stroked her brow. "Thank God. Can you hear me, Selena?"

Liam's face came into focus and Selena stared at him, her eyes full of confusion. She tried to speak, but her voice came out as a hoarse croak.

"Let me get you some water, love." Liam jumped up and ran to fetch a cup. He saw Marcia, and his smile was glorious. "She's awake."

"Thank the Lord," Marcia cried. "I'll be right there."

Liam carried the cup of cool water to Selena and lifted her gently while holding it to her lips. She drank several sips and then pushed it away, wincing in pain.

"What happened?" she whispered.

"You fell in the river and hit your head. You scared the daylights out of me," Liam said softly, still cradling her with his arm.

"My head hurts," she moaned. "I feel sick." The last was spoken as a plea, as she weakly groped for help.

Recognizing her need, Liam grabbed held her face down over his knee while she retched violently onto some nearby grass. There wasn't much in her stomach other than muddy water, but she heaved until she was weak and trembling. Selena groaned in misery, humiliated and aching. Her brow was cold and clammy, and the throbbing pain on the side of her head was growing steadily worse.

"My head hurts," she whispered again as Liam helped her lie back against his arm.

Marcia had come in, and she heard the last. "I'll get her something for the pain." She left again.

"It's alright, sweetheart. We'll take care of you, just rest." Liam pressed a kiss on her forehead and stroked her cheek as he cradled her.

Marcia returned with a cup of hot water laced heavily with whiskey and sugar. Liam held it to Selena's lips. "Drink this. It will ease the pain. Come on, that's right. Drink it all," he coaxed her.

Selena drank it down in tiny sips. She absolutely hated whiskey, but Liam wouldn't let her stop until the cup was drained, and she sighed with relief that it was finished. He laid her gently on the pallet, and she fell asleep almost at once.

Selena slept throughout the day and into the evening. Liam kept a close watch on her, but he was reassured that her breathing was regular, and her heartbeat was strong and steady. His exhaustion finally got the better of him, and he fell asleep on a pallet beside her.

Selena woke up during the night, and she blinked as her eyes adjusted to the darkness. There was a glow of firelight coming from outside, and she could hear the usual night sounds of crickets and other critters. She could also hear the sound of deep, steady breathing, and she turned her head slowly to see Liam sleeping beside her.

Her heart filled with joy. She loved him deeply and completely, and she knew in that moment that he loved her too. She remembered falling in the river and seeing him dive in to save her. The look on his face had been one of pure terror. He definitely wasn't anxious to get rid of her so that he could take up with another woman.

Selena smiled to herself, watching him sleep. She wanted to touch him, but her limbs felt weighted down. She would rest for now, but soon, very soon, she would have to let him know what she felt in her heart.

The next morning dawned, and Selena woke up to see the sky just beginning to turn pink. She rose on one elbow but moaned as the world seemed to spin around her.

Liam woke up instantly. "What is it, Selena? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she mumbled. "I'm just dizzy."

She didn't mention that the throbbing pain in her head was still there. She didn't want to be forced to drink another cup of that wretched whiskey mixture. At least the pain felt less severe than the day before.

"Lay down," he said, gently pulling her back down onto the pallet.

"I need to get up and start breakfast," she moaned.

Liam's laughter was soft and warm as he rose and donned his breeches. "Not this morning, my love. Just rest." He finished dressing and knelt to kiss her forehead, smiling down at her for a moment. "Relax. I'll be back soon."

Selena watched him leave the tent, and she could hear him moving around as he built a fire and put the coffee on to boil. He brought her some of the soup Marcia had made, and Selena assured him that she could eat it without his help. Liam left her once again to take care of the animals and then went to speak with Gerald and Marcia. The other families had gone on the day before, and they couldn't afford to stay any longer.

"We'd better get moving again today. We're getting left behind" Liam said. He frowned with concern as he thought about Selena. There was no way she would be able to sit up all day. "I'm going to make a pallet in the wagon, but I'll need to rearrange a few things to make room."

Gerald offered to help, and Marcia said she would make breakfast for all of them. Within a short time, everything was prepared.

Liam entered the tent and stopped in his tracks. Selena was staring up at him, her eyes were deep purple, and there was the slightest bit of color in her pale cheeks. She was looking up at him with love, not anger, and he dared to hope that maybe she believed in him. He smiled as he knelt on his haunches beside her.

"Good morning, my love," Liam whispered.

"Good morning." Selena's eyes glowed as she returned his smile. His words warmed her heart more than he knew.

"Much as I would prefer to stay and let you rest for another day, we have to get moving today. Would you allow me to help you get dressed?" He stroked her hair back from her brow as he waited for her reply.

Selena was tempted to tell him that she wanted his help getting undressed, but she decided that such an occasion would have to wait until she was feeling better. "Yes, please."

Liam retrieved her suitcase while Selena unbuttoned her nightgown. When he had a fresh chemise, pantalets and the pink gown lain out, he helped Selena to sit up. She clutched at his arm as her dizziness threatened to make her fall down again, and she took several deep breaths to fight off the nausea that washed over her. When the sensations lessened, she loosened her grip.

"Better?" Liam asked gently.

"Yes," she breathed. "Alright. Let's do this."

Selena reached to push her nightgown off her shoulders, letting it pool around her waist. For once, when Liam viewed her naked form, his lusts weren't raging. He was too concerned for her to feel aroused, and his touch was infinitely gentle as he helped her on with her chemise. With one arm around her waist, he lifted her and whisked her nightgown out from under her hips. Again, Selena clung to him, as another wave of dizziness swept over her. Neither of them cared that her lower body was unclothed.

"It's alright, sweetheart. Take your time," he soothed.

His rich, deep voice sounded divine to Selena, and she rubbed her cheek against his shoulder as she clung to him. His clean, masculine smell filled her nostrils and she took several more deep breaths. The wave of nausea finally passed, and Liam slipped the pantalets over her legs. Once again, he lifted her and with her help, they managed to get them over her hips. Liam sat down, straddling her hips from behind and let her lean back against his chest. With strong arms wrapped around her, he deftly tied the pantalets around her waist. When his fingers began nimbly working on the buttons of her chemise, he was surprised to hear a tiny giggle, and he peered askance at Selena.

"What's so funny?" he asked with a grin.

"I was just thinking that, as your wife, perhaps I should be suspicious of the fact that you seem to be so familiar with ladies undergarments. It could lead me to think the very worst." The smile she gave him over her shoulder told him she was teasing.

Still, Liam's grin faded as he replied. "I think we have had more than enough suspicion and doubt cast between us, Selena. I hope that it will soon be gone for good."

The vulnerability in his hazel eyes was too much to bear, and although it caused her discomfort, Selena managed to turn slightly to face him. She cupped his cheek in her palm and gave him a tender smile. "I believe in you, Liam. I have no further doubts."

Liam's heart was thudding heavily in his chest as he searched her eyes, seeing only honest commitment in their violet depths. Ever so gently, he bent to kiss her upturned lips. Their mouths blended and searched, each finding what they sought. When Liam ended the kiss, he smiled down at her. After several moments, he released a reluctant sigh and resumed buttoning her chemise.

"We'd better finish getting you dressed. The others will be waiting for us."

They didn't bother with shoes or stockings. Liam lifted her into his arms and Selena clutched her arms around his neck, waiting for the dizziness to subside once again. He carried her to their wagon and laid her on a small pallet that he had prepared just behind the bench. When he was assured that she was comfortable, he quickly packed up the tent and other bedding, and they got underway.