Tribal Unity

I tried to look casual, holding one arm across the front of me with my makeup bag in hand in front of my pelvic area, while my other hand rested on my shoulder so that my arm draped across most of my chest. I'm sure I wasn't fooling anyone. I was uncomfortable. I maintained pace behind Rick down the embankment to the boat. He turned to assist me into the vessel and I gasped when I saw his full frontal nakedness for the first time. It had been weeks, maybe even months since I'd seen him nude. It was our morning routine to use the sink and facilities and then get dressed, at slightly different times. There wasn't much opportunity for us to happen on each other by accident; and since sex had run its course for us, not much reason to be naked on purpose, either.

I instantly felt guilty. My tiny outburst painted Rick's face a deep crimson. He lowered his eyes and supported my elbow with his hand without so much as looking at my torso. A part of me understood it was out of respect, but another part of me, the vulnerable part that I try to hide, was afraid it was because he didn't find me attractive anymore.

Almost as soon as I sat down in the tiny craft, a chill swept over my frame and settled into my bones. I wanted to believe it was due to the ocean breeze and setting sun, but the temperature was still hovering in the eighties, maybe even higher. It wasn't the tepid air; it was sheer nervousness. Riding those waves, bare ass bouncing on the vinyl cushion beneath me, steady wind across my skin and occasional spray over the side as the boat picked up speed, I realized just how vulnerable I was. Nearly all my shields were gone. I didn't have clothing to protect me from the elements; I didn't have mom and dad to stand over me; I didn't have words of reason that anyone in this place would understand without Christopher's assistance, if he even planned on sticking around. There was only Rick. And a tiny nagging thought occurred to me just then. Do I even have him, anymore?

For the first time since we began fighting, it dawned on me what it was going to feel like without him. I hadn't really tried to imagine life without him as much as I just wanted to run away from the life we were living. There was a difference. I was so focused on what I was running away from, I forgot to think about where I was heading. And that might be a lonely place without him.

It seems ludicrous that such a simple thing like stripping off my clothing in a foreign land could force such a realization. It's not like I had profoundly changed my mind about everything in that moment, but it got me thinking. It made me want to look harder at alternatives to divorce.

The young boy driving the boat, Rafin, cut the motor and jumped over the side a few feet from shore so he could guide the vessel up onto the beach. The sun was rapidly setting on the horizon, throwing brilliant shades of pink and purple across the sand, but I was too focused on my own nakedness to take much notice of anything around us. As if to prove I wasn't as vulnerable as I felt inside, I scrambled out of the craft without assistance to follow our guide to our assigned quarters. My eyes never left the ground until we were standing inside the space we would be sleeping in for the next week or two.

Up until this time, we had been referring to our room as a bungalow. That was somewhat of a misnomer. It was more like a one-room hut. There was one bed, one sink, one toilet, and one nightstand; no interior walls. Not a single hope for privacy. My eyes darted wildly from left to right, up, down, trying to grasp how on earth I would survive this.

"We chatted past suppertime. I'll go round yer up some fruit. It'll have to do ya 'til mornin'."

"Is the water drinkable?"

"Oh, yeah. There should be a glass un'er the sink. Everythin' ya need."

'Everythin' ya need', are you kidding me? This is like camping. It dawned on me that there was no electricity, and no shower! I turned toward the doorway to ask, but Christopher had already stepped out. Beside the door, there was a large opening to the hut, like a rectangular window but without glass. I walked up to it so that the lower half of the wall covered my body and peeked my head out the opening. Dim lighting shone from a few of the other huts and I turned and noticed that Rick was striking a match to light the candle lying on the nightstand.

No one seemed to notice our presence, or they simply didn't care. They certainly weren't scrambling over to welcome us to their village, like I expected. I thought they told us the people were friendly. Not so friendly by my standards.

I realized that I must look like a little child with my hands gripping the rim of the window, peeking out over the edge. I released the sill and stepped backward to sit on the end of the bed. Rick leaned around the doorway, checking out the layout of the tiny village left and right. It was quiet. I listened to the clucking sounds of the tribal dialect from huts next to ours and much farther down, several huts away. There weren't many secrets in this place.

"The villagers are retiring. I see a lot of candles going dim. Everyone has their window open." Rick whispered his report even though we had been assured that no one in this place spoke English except for Christopher. It didn't feel right to speak in a normal tone, even if they couldn't tell what we were saying.

"I don't know about this, Rick. No one has even come to see what we look like. This feels odd."

"Here comes Christopher."

"Ah brought ya a mango, a banana, and a guava." Christopher spoke at a normal volume, making it seem like he was shouting.

"Thanks," Rick managed to utter at a volume barely louder than a whisper.

"No pro'lem. If we'd left soona, ya would'a made dinna and met the people. But something you'll realize righ' away is that no one waits around 'ere."

"Why the rush?"

"There's no rushing; but no waitin', neither. If you can't make up your mind to do somethin', the opportunity passes, it doesn't wait for ya. Time to hit the sack. Things start early 'round 'ere."

"How will we know when to start?"

"You'll 'ear yer neighbors, especially the li'l ones. They don't 'ave a volume control, like we do."

"Where do we go?"

"Just follow the crowd. Ever'one eats in one place. G'nite mates. See ya at breakfast."

I sat frozen for a couple of seconds after he left, not really knowing what to do or say. I remembered after he was gone that I'd forgotten to ask about bathing. Surely these people bathe, right?

We crawled into bed after dropping the cover to our window and swinging our thatch door closed. None of the other huts were closed up like ours but we didn't bother ourselves with the reasons why. I wanted privacy and I didn't care the price at that point. I managed to use the toilet after Rick extinguished the candle. The act didn't create as much sound as I thought it would and I was immensely thankful for that small favor.

****

Chapter Four: Paw-Pui

Just keep running; don't look back. The urge to peer over my shoulder as I fled was too great to resist. I could hear it behind me. My bare foot caught on a stray root growing just under the sand and I faltered, grasping at the vines whipping against my sides. No, no, I can't fall now. I felt another vine underfoot just as I was regaining my balance and sucked in breath to scream...

My heart pounded hard against my chest cavity as I returned to reality. Reality. This is no more real than my dream. I felt something at my feet and realized that the vines of my dream were only Rick's feet entangled with mine in this bed that was probably half the size of our spacious California king at home.

The air in the hut was stifling. Still. Hot. Musky. I sucked hard to pull much needed fresh air into my lungs. It was no use. There was none to be had. That must be why they all sleep with the windows and doors open.

I disentangled my feet from Rick's and rolled onto my back. I could hear faint noises outside. I felt a catch in my throat as I vaguely recalled the nightmare I was having just before I woke. These sounds were human, though. Not whatever thing was chasing me through the tropical jungle. These were the sounds of restless movement just before rising out of bed, the scuffling of feet, tiny murmurs of morning greeting. My breathing turned shallow so that I might take in every noise. There was something comforting and familiar about it. It reminded me of being at home as a child and waking up to the sounds of my mother and father in the kitchen whispering quietly over their morning coffee. Coffee. I suppose there is no chance I'll get any of that here.

Rick straightened his long legs and rolled onto his back. His wide shoulder rested against mine and I suppressed the urge to move away. It wasn't because I was just that opposed to touching him, but because it was hot, and touching only made it feel hotter.

"It's hot in here," Rick groaned as he wiped the beads of sweat from his brow. "I need to open that window..."

"Wait! Before you do, let me use the toilet first. I don't think I can do that with the window open."

"Okay."

I swung my feet over the edge and scuffled sideways around the cramped space until I reached the commode. The hut was pretty dark without the window and door open, so I bent at the waist to try and peer into the space I was about to lower my bare bottom onto.

"What are you looking for?"

In my sleepy state, I had somehow forgotten that I wasn't alone. Five years of being married and I could count on one hand how many times I'd peed in front of him. But now, I had bigger worries than modesty.

"I don't know. Tarantulas, scorpions, snakes, lizards, large insects of any kind, piranhas, eels, sharks."

"You really think there's a shark in there?"

I released the air I was holding in my lungs in anticipation of finding an unsavory creature, and chuckled. Rick's quiet guffaw joined my own in a chorus of laughter. I realized that it was the first time we had laughed together in...I don't know how long.

"No, I guess not." I spun and sat down, satisfied that nothing was going to bother my exposed backside. I was a bit uncomfortable, still. The release of laughter helped but it didn't remove my inhibitions, entirely. Rick must've sensed my discomfort and rescued me with idle chatter.

"I'm surprised that we even have a toilet and running water. I don't think any of the other huts have it. At least, I haven't heard water running. And I'm curious if the villagers sleep on a mattress like this or if they just crash on the floor. Or ground, rather. Still, it'd probably be cooler there. Maybe not more comfortable, but slightly more room."

"Yeah, I had this dream I was tripping on something. I think because our feet were all tangled together."

I had finished my business while Rick was pontificating on the local comforts. I was certain that later in the morning, I would have to visit the spot again and prayed that Rick would be elsewhere. I stood and paused for a brief moment. It felt strange not having any clothing to pull up, refasten, whatever. I walked to the sink to brush my teeth and allow Rick his moment on the toilet. I snuck a quick peek behind me to see if he was sitting or standing. Sitting. Interesting. Wonder if that's out of modesty or politeness. Doesn't matter, I guess.

Chatter from outside the hut was becoming louder and more animated. The rhythm of my heartbeat accelerated a notch in anticipation of the unknown. Rick lifted the thatch covering over the window and observed the activity while I stood awkwardly at the sink.

"Looks like people are heading to breakfast. I can't see where they're ending up, but they're heading that way. Ready to join the crowd?"

I swallowed hard and nodded. Rick remembered he needed to brush his teeth, and that gave me a few more seconds to settle my now thrumming heart. It wasn't long enough, but I suspected nothing short of facing my fear would slow it down.

Rick opened the door and stood in the passageway for several seconds with me behind him. I'm not sure if he did it on purpose or not, but it helped me muster up some courage. It could just as easily have been his own way of gathering strength, or him just soaking in the surroundings. At any rate, I was thankful he did it.

The hard ground underneath my bare feet was already warm from the sun. I briefly wondered how difficult it was going to be to walk outside in the afternoon. As it was, I had enough trouble just trying to get over how sensitive the bottoms of my feet were to every little rock, stone and stick. I hopped over one stone to quickly realize how bad that choice was for braless and exposed breasts. Glancing over at Rick, he suffered a similar problem when he walked, but I gathered that he was far less bothered by it than I was.

The general attitude of the crowd was pleasant. Content. Just like the girl I saw yesterday. Peaceful; easy. A woman caught my eye as I was lost in thought about how to describe what I was observing. She opened up with a smile that spanned her entire face, bringing me back to the present time. As if I spoke fluent Hiki, she spoke to me as she approached. An uncomfortable smile stretched my lips and color rushed to my cheeks. I gathered she was doing nothing more than welcoming us, though, so I nodded and patted the hand that had come to rest so easily on my arm.

She continued to hold onto me, talking up a storm as we walked to the dining area. Her fingers stroked the hair on my arm as if I were a kitten. Her soft, exposed skin brushed against my side as we moved and I would have felt embarrassed by it all, by the sheer intimacy of it, had she not held me captive by her warm, friendly smile. My left hand reached out to Rick's and he intertwined his fingers with mine to reassure me. And then I took my first real breath since leaving the hut.

The dining area was buzzing with activity. Lively conversations, laughter, hustled movements. It wasn't leisure social time; you got a real sense that there was a purpose to being here, and it would be served efficiently, without undue delay. Christopher nodded to us from across the room and swiftly headed in our direction. My new friend disengaged herself from my arm and I waved as she moved purposefully toward the open fire stove.

Several glances in our direction provided one important social detail to me: There were few rules of etiquette when it came to eye contact. No amount of staring seemed to be inappropriate and no part of the body was off-limits to blatant ogling. It was a bit unnerving at first, and even more difficult, I discovered, to reciprocate. I couldn't seem to bring myself to overcome my own sense of propriety about scanning the nude bodies in front of me. It was interesting and a source of pondering in my own mind. I seemed to have fewer qualms about being looked at, than looking myself. Hmmmm...that's odd, isn't it?

"G'mornin'. 'Ow'd ya sleep?"

"Okay.""Good." We both spouted nervously at the same time.

"'Ave a seat 'ere." Christopher pointed to a couple of empty stools and joined us across the table. We weren't settled for long when someone spoke above the noise of the crowd and all eyes briefly glanced in our direction. Christopher then announced our presence, although I doubt it was necessary. The group of people was hardly large enough to get lost in. We received many smiles, some waves, and a few chuckles, no doubt about the way I was shielding myself behind Rick's arm.

The food was actually amazing, especially considering it was prepared for a mass gathering. Christopher asked us if we drank coffee and I practically broke into tears as I gushed, "Yes!"

Before you knew it, people were standing up and heading out from the eating area. As they were walking away, I noticed groups being formed and the first sign of children coming our direction. There were maybe eight of them in various stages of childhood; it was difficult to count as they darted about. They quickly gathered together at the closest table to the fire and sat down to eat. They took turns glancing in our direction as they giggled between bites.

"Is that all the children of the village?"

Christopher scanned over the grouping briefly before responding, "Yeah, 'at's all of 'em."

"It doesn't seem like very many."

"Hiki women aren't fer'ile for very long. Each one is only capable of 'aving no more than two children in their lifetime."

"Really? Why?"

"Don't know. Genetics. It's very specific to this tribe. None of the othah tribes are affected the same way."

"Can it be something on the island?"

Christopher grinned widely, "Nah, it's not that. Visitors don't 'ave any problem gettin' knocked-up. There's one couple been 'ere four times. 'As four kids. Not too difficult to figure tha' one out."

Rick glanced furtively in my direction for a brief moment but avoided direct eye contact. He's probably worried that if we do actually have sex here, I might get pregnant. That could complicate things considerably.

"Wonder why they have problems with it here, then."

"No one's sayin' it's a problem. If they 'ad more kids, they'd 'ave a population explosion, and then an inbreeding issue, most likely. This is nature's way of skirtin' disastah. No, they see it as more of a blessin'."

The next group of adults finished their chores and scurried off.

"People clear out of here fast."

"Everyone 'as a job to do. No sense in sittin' 'round. Laziness doesn't feed, propagate, or protect the Hiki. You see, they live by a sort of code of contribution. Every individual contributes. It keeps their community thrivin'."

"Do they ever change jobs?"

"Sometimes. But only if necessity dictates it. If, say, we needed to clear a path to the lagoon, a couple blokes might stop what they're doin' to get it done. But only if it was more important, more necessary to the Hiki. Understand?"

"Yeah. Pretty simple, actually."

"Righ'."

"What's your contribution?"

"Ah bring payin' customers 'ere, which in turn, buys them medicine, supplies, goats, food they can't grow on the island."

"And what do you get out of it?"

"You're direct, aren't you?"

"I'm an accountant. I know how commerce works."

"Yeah, well, Ah don't take a cut. Instead, Ah get to live 'ere fer free."

"I'd ask you why, but I get the feeling you'll just tell me to wait and see for myself."

"Yah smarter than ya look, mate. Yah gonna understan' a lot more about this place by the end of today. You'll see wha' Ah mean." Christopher then called out something to one of the two women who still remained. He turned and eyed me and then Rick as if he were sizing us up. "Danon is fixing up a batch of paw-pui. It's a balm for fightin' off insects and protectin' ya from the sun. It lasts a couple o' days, even wif bathin'."

I sat upright as if I'd been hit in the back with a two-by-four, "Bathing? What about it? How, when?"

"In the afternoon. Aftah the drinkin' water 'as been collected for the day. Down in the lagoon."

"Does everyone go there at once?" I don't mean to be prude, but...

"Yeah. Well, not everyone, everyday. But most people, yeah. Aw, ya aren't goin' to complain about this, are ya? Ya just sat there eatin' breakfast in the nick; ya gonna tell me this bothers ya, now?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I guess...I guess it's no different. It's just the idea of it."

Christopher smiled, "You'll get over it soon enough. Anyway, Ah doubt we'll 'ave time today. Ah need to show ya aroun'."

Danon scuffled up and spoke with Christopher as she placed the bowl on the table. She looked over at us with the same expression that Christopher had a few moments earlier and then grinned as she spoke again.