Ugly Redhead Ch. 06byLordLoxley©
Over the weekend, he didn't even bother to try to call one of his lady friends. Hell, he didn't even think of it. He could not stop obsessing over Lexis. Her audacity... her sheer perverted creativity... boggled his mind. Who would have the idea to suck a teacher's cock in full view of his class? Who would even think of such a thing? He had never met a woman so deviant and so sexy, let alone an eighteen year-old girl.
He didn't know whether to be disgusted and ashamed, or fascinated and inflamed. So he did them all. Naturally, this wrecked his mentality, and he suffered through the weekend in a haze of lust and guilt. He masturbated until his penis was raw, and hated himself for each and every time. The hate seemed to fuel the obsession as much as the lust.
My God, what is happening to me? What's to become of me? he lamented in the wee hours of Monday morning.
He arrived at school a bit late Monday, but still in time for his meeting with the councilor. He'd had just a few hours sleep and knew he looked like hell. He might have even called in sick, but he needed to talk to this woman. Perhaps she could shed some useful insight on Lexis' situation.
Who am I kidding, he thought, this is just another part of my obsession. Well, true or not, he was hooked, and he was at the meeting on time.
Ms. James, the school councilor, walked in about five minutes late. "Sorry," she said, "Traffic on the interstate." She opened her office door and ushered him inside.
"Not to worry," he croaked, realizing she was the first human being he had talked to since Friday at 3:30. "I just got here myself." He took a seat at one of the comfortable chairs situated beside her desk.
"Lovely. So what can I do for you?" she said, setting her things down and settling down in her chair. She was a rather ugly woman with kind eyes.
"Well, I'm a bit worried, to be honest," he sighed, "about Lexis Miller." He noticed a definite uptick of her eyebrows at the mention. "Her studies have been suffering in Math class, and I was hoping you could help give my insight into her home situation. I know she has come to you. Is there anything I can do to help?"
Ms. James smiled, and almost became beautiful in her sincere empathy. "You don't know?" She paused and handed Mike a newspaper clipping. "Poor child."
Mike took a minute to read the article, and everything clicked into place. It was about a seventeen year old local girl, who had allegedly been forced to be the sex slave of her mother's boyfriend for an entire year. The clipping was brief, and of course the girl's name was not mentioned, but...
Mike looked at Ms. James and raised his eyebrows.
"Yes. That's Lexis. And the worst part is, he was not convicted. There simply was not enough evidence, and the mother swore it was not true. Lexis alone had no legal standing (as a minor at the time) and when balanced against her own mother's testimony, well... let's just say she lost. In a big way."
Her large, moist eyes welled with tears. "He was convicted of some minor weapons charges, but he will be out in a few months."
She leaned forward. "Mr. Bell, I believe her. I have sat with her here in this very office, watching her cry her eyes out. She's telling the truth. He beat her, abused her emotionally, and he raped her. And that monster will come home soon." She reached out and took Mike's hand in the stunned silence that followed. "And there's nothing either of us can do about it."
Mike was shocked to his core. He had known that her behavior was unusually sexual, but this... Those bruises on her arms and legs that had merely seemed part of an awkward teen's normal injuries suddenly came into refocus. There were way too many of them. And Lexis talking about how ugly she was. Someone with authority had been telling her that. Over and over.
His whole perspective on Lexis shifted. She was no devious lolita, luring him to his destruction. She was a rape victim. She was a child trying to make sense of an insane world. And she had turned to him...
And he had failed her in the worst possible way. He put his face in his hands and started to weep. Ms. James mistook his emotion and squeezed his hand even harder. "Mr. Bell, believe me, I feel the same way. But you cannot let these kids' problems burn you out. You have to be able to do your part, then walk away."
He looked up with tear blurred eyes and she said, "If you kill yourself over things you can not change, then your life will have been thrown away for nothing. As a teacher, you know this. We have to find balance in this mad world."
Mike struggled to find some silver lining in the whole mess. "But she is eighteen now, can't she just leave?"
"And go where? You know Lexis. Despite her age, she is quite immature. She has no where to go, Mr. Bell." She smiled a worldly, sad smile. "But we can, no, we must be here for her. We are her last hope."
Mike was impressed with this woman. Whatever beauty had been left from her exterior was more than redeemed by her inner radiance. Mike saw that she was a truly beautiful woman. He thanked her and stumbled out the door. As he left, he noticed Lexis, walking towards Ms. James' office.
And she saw him. Her old surly look came back immediately and she stomped past him without a word.
Over the next week, Lexis was horrible. She refused to do any work, replied only in monosyllables, and was in general unpleasant and surly. She clearly did not like the idea that Mike had been prying into her personal life.
Mike, for his part, was torn as usual. He felt immense compassion for the girl, who had suffered so much. On the other hand, he was rife with self-loathing. After all, hadn't he done exactly the same thing that sick monster had? He could not get over the fact that he had heaped even more abuse on the young girl.
And finally, of course, there was the unbearable lust. He simply could not stop thinking about her brazen stunt. That she would suck his cock just feet away from her unsuspecting classmates was the biggest turn on he had ever known. His all-time top three sexual experiences now all featured the quirky adolescent. Nothing else in his life had even come close.
So he was consumed in a storm of pity, self-loathing, and lust. He was losing sleep and as the week wore on, he developed bags under his eyes and a pale, sickly complexion. He found that he was less patient with his students, and quicker to snap at them for minor offenses.
He called in sick on Friday, unable to even get out of bed.
When he finally drug himself out of bed, it was close to two o'clock in the afternoon. After going to the bathroom, he looked in the mirror. Hair crazed, dark circles under his eyes; he was a mess.
He stood there, looking into his own eyes, and he had a moment of truth. No matter how much this might be tearing him apart, it was far worse for Lexis. She had been the one abused. And she knew that her mother's boyfriend would be returning in a couple months to resume that abuse. Further, her mother was against her, calling her a liar and blaming her for the man's jail time.
She was literally alone in an ugly, hateful world. She had no family, no friends, absolutely no one to turn to.
He straightened with new resolve. He knew that he had to put aside his own conflicted emotions and feelings in order to help Lexis. He wasn't sure how he could help her, but he knew he could at least be there for her to talk to. He could not let his own unnatural attraction to her cause her to lose yet another sympathetic ally. He would stand by her, no matter what.
Having resolved his course of action, he suddenly felt much better. He would once again be a force of good in her life. No more sexual nonsense. He would be firm and loving, and he would help the poor abused child.
He slept better that weekend than he had in a long time, and by the time Monday morning dawned, he practically leaped out of bed.
During 7th period, Lexis was once again silent and moody, but Mike didn't let it get him down. At the end of class, he called out, "Oh, Lexis, will you stay after for a few minutes? I need to ask you about your project."
She looked suspiciously at him and curled her lip in a bit of a snarl, but she complied. After the other students filed out of the room, he began.
"Look, Lexis, as you know, I've been to talk to Ms. James and..."
She interrupted in fierce hiss, "You had no right!"
He laid his hand on hers and said gently, "I just want to help, Lexis. I really care for you and I just wanted to know what was going on at home. I'm sorry if you feel I've intruded on your privacy."
"Well you did," she said, but with less anger. "I hate you."
He looked up into her eyes as she said this, but they did not seem to agree with her words. Her breath hitched as she slowly said, "Are you serious that you care for me?"
He smiled a deep and genuine smile. "Yes," he said. Shaking his head, he went on, "I mean, I care for all my students, but you are different. It's crazy, but I think the world of you. I've had trouble dealing with my feelings for you, but I won't make the mistake of trying to deny them anymore."
He gripped her hand tightly. "I want to help you, but the sexual stuff has to stop. Okay?"
She smiled and suddenly she was very beautiful, crooked teeth and all. "I knew you loved me, Mr. Bell. I love you too."
Mike suddenly felt intensely uncomfortable. It was difficult not to blow her off and her sentimental adolescent ideas of love. But he fought the urge, remembering how desperately this child needed love right now.
"Okay, Lexis. So... can we go back to normal now?
And so they did, for the most part. Lexis was still annoying at times, but not nearly as bad as she had been, and Mike's compassion seemed to be trumping his passion, so to speak. For the next two weeks things went pretty well, and Mike was starting to believe they had made it through the crisis.
He still had fantasies about her, and he dreamed about her almost every night, but the intensity had faded, replaced by a genuine fondness for the awkward young girl.