Why I Hated The Guy From The FBI

When Saturday morning arrived, Frank dressed in his 'Tans' and walked, with a slight limp, to Anthony Caruso's house.

He was stopped in front of it, by two men, who asked what he wanted.

Frank told them who he was, and said that Mister Caruso had offered to see him, when he got home.

One man stayed with him, while the other went to the door, and went inside to ask for instructions. Moments later, he returned and told Frank he could go inside.

As Frank approached the front door, it was opened and Anthony stood there, with his right hand outstretched, welcoming Frank into his home. Frank thanked him for the invitation, and appreciated his kindness in seeing him. They sat down in his living room, and they were joined by Vincent, moments later. Rose came in bringing coffee and desserts. Then, she disappeared.

Anthony asked Frank about the situation in the Middle East, and received a briefing from, as Frank put it, "a ground pounder's point of view." When Frank was done, all Anthony and Vincent could do was laugh.

"Are you telling me, if we killed everyone above the rank of major, this war would bend over eight years ago?"

"Yes sir, without a doubt, sir. It seems once they get their Colonels Silver Leaf, all they start doing is kissing the ass of someone above them. They forget what is going on, on the field of battle, and screw up everything, from that point on. I can recommend a book for you to read, if you want to see how everything is screwed, by the higher-ups. It is called, "Not a Good Day to Die." When you finish it, if you do not want to kill everyone, from the rank of General down to Colonel, I would be surprised."

From the doorway to the living room, a female voice said, "As long as they are all men that is fine with me."

Frank turned to his left, saw Antonia, and stood up, immediately.

Anthony said, "Frank, this is my daughter Antonia. Antonia this is Frank Gennaro. He and his parents live three doors down from us."

Frank bowed at the waist, stuck out his hand and said, "How do you do ma'am."

Antonia bristled at the word ma'am and said, "I am a Miss, not ma'am, you idiot."

Frank replied, "Yes, ma'am."

Anthony and Vinny rolled laughter, because Antonia had no idea why Frank kept calling her, "ma'am."

Antonia spun on her heel, muttering to herself, about the idiots they let into the services, and left the room. She had no idea who this dolt was, and why he annoyed her so much.

Frank turned to Anthony and said, "I do not think she likes me."

Anthony said, "In that case, Frank, I think I would like to offer you a job."

"Sir, before you do, I need to tell you there are certain things, I can no longer do. Some are very personal, and I do not like to talk about. Others involved movement. I have shrapnel wounds near my spine, in my hip, and in my right leg. I can no longer run very fast, nor do strenuous lifting. If the steel near my spine moves, I could be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I want to avoid that at all costs."

"What I have in mind for you should not put you in any danger, at all, in those areas. Can you get a weapons permit?"

"I do not see why not, I still have my pistol in my duffel bag and I can apply for my license at any state office on Monday. My record is clean, and my discharge does not take effect until Wednesday. What kind of job would it be, sir?"

"First, Frank, call me Tony. Your job consists of guarding my daughter, at all times, when she is outside this house."

"Sir, eerr, Tony, she does not like me. It think it would be better, if you got someone she liked."

"Frank, you will be perfect for her. Try to call her 'Miss,' instead of ma'am and it might help you a little."

"Yes sir, eerr, Tony. Thank you for the job. When would you want me to start?"

"As long as you carry your gun, you can take her to a PG rated movie, on Friday."

"Thank you, sir, / Tony. You tell me whatever hours you want me to work, and I will be here for you. Day or night, I am at your service."

"Thank you, Frank; it was very nice seeing you, again."

While he was in the house, Frank was able to place three small listening devices: one in the living room, and two in the hallway. If Vincent had not been in the room, with them, he would have been able to plant more, but that could not be helped. At least, he had access to the inside of the house. This could prove to be interesting, because she seemed to be a wildcard. He wanted to get home and make a call to see if the bugs were working.

As soon as Frank closed the door, Anthony picked up his cell phone and called his lawyer. He said, "Tim, I want everything that you can find out about Frank Gennaro, my neighbors kid. Full medical and everything, from the time he left high school, to the day he walked back into his house yesterday. I want it by Tuesday."

Tim Robins had no idea why his boss had given him so much time. Normally when Anthony Caruso wanted something, he wanted it yesterday. He could actually stay at home and watch his daughter's softball game this afternoon, which would be something he had not been able to do, in a very long time. This kid must not be important.

During the week, Frank walked around the neighborhood meeting and greeting all the old neighbors, and some of his old friends, that were still around. He could feel the eyes watching him as he took his walks but did nothing to show that he was ill at ease. He saw pictures being taken of him through car windows as he walked, and was sure that his parent's house was under surveillance.

On Wednesday morning, Frank was picked up by a military sedan, and taken to the veteran's hospital in Queens for his, "Final Checkup, and Military Discharge." Both he and the driver picked up the car tailing them, immediately. While he was in the bowels of the building, he briefed his handlers on what he had accomplished to date, and what was going to be going on in the near future.

They could not believe his luck. Getting access to the inside of Anthony Caruso's house was something out of a dream. Wiretaps had never worked, because he always used throwaway cell phones, and getting a court order, had become impossible. Tony's windows were wired with sound, which disrupted any attempts at listening to conversations from long-range microphones, and now, they had unfettered access to the inside of the 'Dons' house.

As Frank exited the front of the hospital and walked towards the parking lot looking for his ride home, a horn beeped. Frank looked to his right, and saw Anthony waving at him, from a limousine. Frank waved back.

"Frank, let me give you a ride home."

"Sir, I have to tell my driver I will not be going back with him. Would you hold these papers for me, until I get back?"

"Absolutely, Frank, take your time."

Frank limped off in the direction of the parking lot, and Tony did exactly what he wanted to do, anyhow. He looked at each piece of paper, and photographed them. He put the package back together, exactly as he had taken it apart, and closed it, just as Frank reappeared."

As he sat down in the limousine, Frank laughed and said, "My driver wanted to give me a twenty dollar tip, for not having to drive out to Brooklyn. He said he had a date tonight, and would never have made back in time to meet her."

Tony laughed and asked Frank how he felt.

Frank's jovial mood became somber and Anthony saw it on his face.

"Frank what is wrong?"

"Tony, I still do not think you should hire me, to protect your daughter. I might let you down, at the wrong moment. The shrapnel has turned, and moved closer to my spine. Even though there is room for it to travel, before it hits the nerve, I do not know if you want to take a chance, with her protection, with someone who might not be able to offer it, at the right time. "

"Frank, my daughter is looking forward to going to a movie, on Friday. If you do not take her, I can guarantee you; you will not have to worry about paralysis, because she will kill you."

"Sir, I felt it was my obligation to tell you this. I do not want to hide anything from you. I am not, fully, the man I was when I entered the corp. I will never be, again."

"I understand, Frank. We will talk more about it tomorrow."

"Yes sir."

The following morning at seven o'clock, Phil Gennaro picked up the kitchen phone, and said, "Hello."

"Hello Phil, Tony Caruso, is Frank up?"

"Frank told me, if you ever called, to get him, wherever he was."

"Good. Tell him, I want him at my house, now."

Phil ran up the stairs to Frank's room and woke him up. He said, "Anthony wants you at his house, 'Now!'"

Frank slept naked. He threw on a pair of running shorts, grabbed his pistol, and a T-shirt, and in his best imitation of a running limp, ran to Tony's house.

Tony was standing on the porch waiting for him, and laughed as he approached.

"What's the matter sir? What do you need?"

"I need you, Frank. Come with me. Oh, give me the gun; it was a good idea though."

"Thank you. There is one in the chamber, sir. "

Tony led Frank into the basement, of his home, where he found two men and two very beautiful and scantily clad women.

Frank looked around and asked, "What is going on, boss?"

"Frank, I know everything about you, from high school to yesterday. There is nothing you have ever done, I do not know about. You are an open book, and I am about to turn my daughter over to your protection. Even though it says so on paper, I have to make sure, with my own eyes, that it is true. These two women work for me. They are going to prove to me, what the doctors have written on your medical record. If you pass the test you will live, if you fail, you will die. It is that simple Frank. Strip!"

Frank smiled and said, "I wish I knew this was coming, sir. I would have put more clothes on."

Tony laughed and watched as he dropped his shorts. Tony looked at the scar that went up Frank's leg from his knee to his groin. His limp Dycke was impressive, but lifeless. Tony looked at the two women and said, "Go to work."

The two women knelt before Frank. The one on the left leg, played with his balls, while the one on his right, used her mouth to try to wake up his sleeping cock. They were both professionals, and they both did their job well, but nothing happened. Frank had his hands on their heads and assisted them in every way possible. After five minutes of work, by both women, his cock was still flaccid.

"I remember when I would have had to pay for this. I would give anything to have that opportunity back now."

Tony nodded his head and told the women to stop. "Frank, you get to live. However, I have a feeling it is going to be very hard for you."

"I have thought about going back to school, and becoming a priest. However, that thing between my legs is not the only thing you have to put out of your mind to be a good one. I still have more thinking to do, before I make my decision."

"God may be sending you a message. Do not discount it."

"Thank you, Tony. Can I go back to sleep now, or was there something else that you wanted me to do."

"You never asked me what I was paying you."

"Sir, I have known you, since I was a little kid. I knew you would pay me whatever was fair. This neighborhood loves you, and you have taken care of it for more years then I can remember. I would never presume to ask you a question about money."

Tony looked at the two men in the background, who had their heads held towards the ground, and said to them, "Do you understand the meaning of respect, now."

"Frank, I am going to start you out and two thousand a week. My daughter never puts her hand in her pocket, when she is with you. You pay for everything. If she wants to go shopping, come to me, and I will give you an extra grand, or two. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

3. Our First Date

"Antonia, get down here."

"Yes, dad, what do you want now?"

"I have decided to allow you to go out to the movie theater, or go shopping at a mall, whenever you want."

"I know you better than this dad. There has to be a catch. What do I have to do, to be allowed to this great privilege?"

"Antonia, I only do things to keep you safe. I hope you have a good time, at the movies. You should get ready; the movie starts soon."

"Thank you, dad, I will have a good time."

"Hurry up; your date will be here in ten minutes."

"Shit. I knew it."

"Antonia, watch your mouth."

"Dad, if there was a way to ruin my day, you would take a year out of your life to find it."

Tony walked over to his daughter and said, "Young woman, you have a choice; either go to the movies, with the young man, I have selected, or go to your room."

"Which one did you choose, dad, the fat one, or garlic breath?"

Frank opened the front door and walked in.

Antonia looked at him, and said, "Oh, you picked the one with no brain."

Frank heard Antonia and asked,"Ma'am is it true, that when all young women reach puberty, they believe all things in heaven and on earth begin and end with a period?"

Tony let out with a huge laugh, while Antonia stood with her mouth open and no words coming out.

"Is there something wrong with your mouth, ma'am, or is my foot, so far down your throat, you cannot breathe?"

"Frank, I have never seen her at a loss for words."

"It is because she was trained by nuns, Tony. She does want to say something; however, 'she suffers in silence.'"

Antonia finally became alert enough to say, "I hate you, you dork."

"How much money did you spend on her education, sir?"

Tony started laughing, and walked away.

"You are not going to get away with this, Frank."

"Yes ma'am. I will get you a dictionary, with small words, so they will come out easier."

Antonia screamed in frustration, and walked out of the front door, ahead of him.

As she sat in the car, silently fuming, Frank asked her, "Did you or your father pick out the movie you are seeing?"

"I have not been allowed to pick out anything, for myself, since the day I was born."

"Can you keep your mouth shut?"

"According to you 'I suffer in silence.'"

"In that case, when we get to the movie theater, you can pick out whatever movie you would like to see, as long as it is not too risqué."

"I watched Vincent fuck a girl, a few days ago, on my computer, and I cannot go to a risqué movie."

"How the hell did you do that, without being in the room with him?"

"My father gave me one of these advanced digital phones. I put it in his room and it sent live pictures directly to my computer. Then, I saved it."

"If your father ever finds out about that, he will kill you."

"I am not going to tell him, are you?"

"No, this is privileged conversation, as far as I am concerned. Whatever you say to me, when we are alone, stays between us. I will not break that trust, as long as it does not affect your safety. Is that okay with you?"

"If I said something disparaging about my father, you would not repeat it to him."

"From the size of the handprint on your face, I think you have said just about everything you wanted to say, about your father, to his face, already."

"Sometimes nuns do not suffer in silence, and neither do I."

They pulled into the parking lot, at the cinema multiplex, and Antonia looked at all the advertised movies. She asked if she could see the movie, "Goodfellas."

"Positively, absolutely, no."

"Why not, Frank?"

"Your father lives that movie every day of his life, Antonia, and I do not want you to see what he does."

"Is that not more reason for me to see it for myself?"

"It is a great question, but you are not seeing that movie, with me."

Antonia asked, "How about that movie, "Ghost?"

Frank said, "Yes, that one is okay."

Two hours later, Frank almost had to carry her out of the theater. Antonia was inconsolable. The first movie she decided to see, on a large screen was not the horror movie she expected, but a tearjerker, that broke her eighteen-year-old heart.

"I want to go home, Frank. I want to go home, now."

"Yes ma'am."

When Frank opened the front door for her, she ran crying to her room. Tony came running at Frank, wanting to know what happened to his daughter.

All Frank could do was laugh, and the more he laughed the more furious Tony was.

"Tony, I let her see "Ghost." She thought it was going to be a horror show. I knew it was a love story, but I did not tell her. Once Demi Moore started crying, so did Antonia. She has not stopped since. I nearly had to carry her out of the theater. I have never laughed so hard in my life. I think that made her cry more. I think you should send Rose up there with a gallon of water, because that girl has to be running on empty."

Tony started laughing, and told Frank what a wonderful job he had done on his first date. He said, "Frank, next time I will put a five gallon jug of Gatorade, in the back of the car, just in case this happens again."

The next few weeks, Frank and Antonia settled into a comfortable pattern. They would go to one or another of the local malls for a few hours every day, and then to dinner and a movie twice a week.

The more Antonia was around Frank, the more she opened up to him. She realized that he was keeping his promise, not to tell her father, what was transpiring between them.

Frank on the other hand, was planting bugs in the house, every time he was there. He could find no excuse to go down into the basement, where he knew any real business would transpire, if Tony had a meeting at home.

Tony and Frank were sitting in the living room, waiting for Antonia to come down, when Rose walked into the room and said, "Tony, we have no water pressure."

Frank, being a plumber son, said, "Oh shit, Tony the basement."

Both men charged to the basement door and sure enough, there was a flood.

Frank took off his shoes and waded through the water, to get to the shut off valve. It was frozen solid. He looked at Tony, who was on the stairway and asked him if he had a wrench.

Tony pointed to a toolbox in the corner of the basement, and Frank waded through the knee-high water to get it. He took the wrench back to the cut off valve, gave it two solid hits on its face, and then tried to turn it to the left to shut off the water. It worked.

"Tony, where are your drains?"

"There are two: One by the hot water heater and another by that table."

Frank took off his shirt and pants, and dove under the water towards the hot water heater and cleared the debris from the first drain. He surfaced and swam towards the table. He dove again and cleared the debris from the second drain. He continued doing this for half an hour and watched the water drain from the basement.

As he held onto his back, and grimaced in pain, he looked up at Tony, and said, "I learned all of this, from my father."

Tony smiled, "In that case, I will pay him."

"You are going to have to call him, to find out what happened down here to cause this. It may be as simple as the hot water heater or a busted pipe under the foundation. I can do the simple stuff, but he is the expert."

Tony said, "Call him, tell him it is an emergency, and to bring three or four guys with him. I want this fixed today."

Frank said, "Yes sir."

Frank walked upstairs in his underwear, carrying his soaked pants, shirt, and shoes.

"Is that how you are taking me out to dinner, Frank?"

"Why, do you think I am overdressed?"

"I do not mind, however, you may catch a chill from the air-conditioning."

"Air-conditioning at a hotdog stand?"

Antonia was infuriated. "Do you ever find yourself in a position, that you do not have the perfect response to someone's dig?"

"Oh was that what that was?"

Antonia screamed in frustration.

"I will be back in twenty minutes after I shower and change. Think about where you would like to go for dinner. There is a big book called 'The Yellow Pages.' It can give you all sorts of ideas."