Women: Conniving, Scheming...bycarvohi©
Some opening remarks:
First, thanks to Harry R for so diligently proofing this story.
Second, I want to express regret regarding the short story 'Just One of The Things'. It was a 4:00 a.m. dark of the night thing. One commenter's admonition was especially poignant. He reminded me many LW readers are suffering from unhappy break ups, and my story was excessively painful. For that I'm sorry. Hopeful of some reprieve Iron Dragon has completed a sequel to my morose tale. He allowed me to read it, and it should be posted soon. I hope his story affords me some redemption.
Third, I have two more stories I want to finish in the next few days. My last chapter to Revelations is almost there, and I have another LW, a longer one, that could be interesting.
Fourth, about this story. One of the protagonists you'll find is electronically handicapped. Criticisms of her inadequacies pertaining to terminology and purposes would be superfluous so don't bother. Additionally, I've taken poetic license regarding times a divorce might be finalized. I've kept the eastern story site vague; it could be in any state. Also remember D.Q. Steele in his classic When We Were Married did the same. Last, if you think the female protagonist cries a lot bear in mind raising females is always high drama.
I want you to enjoy this story. It's about infidelity, discovery, unhappiness, divorce, and recovery but from a less seen perspective. Have a good time. Here goes.
I remember the first time I saw Delwyn, that's Del to his friends, I'd agreed to go this political seminar with my older sister. My oldest sister's name is Vonda. By the way my name is Sherry, as in Sherry Van Dyke.
All three of my siblings; I mean Vonda, Nancy and Chelsea are older than me, and like our mom and dad, they're all right wing, conservatives. Yes, they're Republican to the bone. I guess I'm the black sheep of the family. I'm a left wing liberal. In fact I'm about as left wing as they come.
Don't get me wrong; this story isn't about politics, but it was politics that got the ball rolling. Let me tell the story, and you'll see what I mean.
We were all sitting around the table in my mom and dad's dining room. Anyway this was three years after I saw Del at the seminar I just mentioned. My sisters, their husbands, and my parents were all riding me about the president. The president by the way is a Democrat, he's black, and he's a little on the liberal side.
My oldest sister, that's Vonda, she was married to Del, and she was giving me this raft of poop about the president. She was telling me how he's a liar, he's corrupt, his birth certificate is a fake, he's not really a Christian, and he well...you know...he's just not like us.
Now I'd heard all this crap a hundred times before, but since I was the youngest of my dad's 'four misses', I was expected to 'tow the mark', be a 'good girl', and not argue with 'my elders'. Not this time! This time I decided to fight back. I fought back for my self-esteem, for the president, but also for another reason I'll leave unmentioned.
My oldest sister, Vonda, was a woman I secretly hated with the kind of blind passion that would have made Osama Bin Laden proud, not that I liked him in any way shape or form. She was waxing profound about how the president had committed all these 'high crimes and misdemeanors', and he should be impeached by the House, brought to trial in the Senate and removed from office.
I'd had enough. Vonda is the oldest and certainly the hottest of the four of us girls. She's a cool 5'6", weighs a taut 140 lbs.; she has light sandy colored hair, light blue eyes, and the kind of body men have gone to war over. I mean she has a classic set of hard nippled, pear shaped 36Cs that just make me want to puke. Add to that her classic wasp's waist, a perfect heart shaped ass, and an absolutely gorgeous face and you've got everything I'm not.
Vonda's a college graduate. I am too, as are my other sisters. She graduated from the local university, the names not important. Every city has a couple' they're the big colleges with a handful of token dormitories, but where almost everybody else commutes back and forth from home or from an apartment to school.
Vonda got her training in the medical profession, and emerged as a Physician's Assistant. She got a pretty good job at the local hospital, and in a couple of years she was promoted to head PA. in the cardiac unit. Don't ask me the details. I majored in English Literature and since then got a job teaching tenth grade English at one of the public schools. Among the four sisters I'm the least successful. They all say it's because I'm the stupid one, and that's why I'm a Democrat. Who knows? Maybe they're right?
Well here we were sitting around mom and dad's dining room table, and everybody was throwing dung on the wall about the president just to see what might stick. There are these two senators, one from Arizona and another from South Carolina who've been doing it for years. Vonda was the loudest, and to me, the most obnoxious. I had heard just about enough.
I hope everyone's still reading. This is where it starts to get good.
I gave Vonda one of my best hairy eyeballs, and asked her, "Vonda how many hours do you put in a week at the hospital?" Now this is an old song of hers; how she's always on call, and how she has to put in all these long hours.
Vonda stiffened her back in pride, glanced at her loving husband, that's Del, and answered, "I guess about seventy hours a week."
I had her, "You're that incompetent?"
She looked at me like I was really stupid. My dad started to say something, but I put up a hand and held him off. I looked back at my ever loving older sister, "This is America. In America most people put in around forty hours a week, actually thirty-seven and a half given a half hour off each day for lunch. You say you put in seventy hours so it means it takes you nearly twice as long to get done what everybody can get done in forty."
Vonda flared back, "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. You..."
I cut her off. I wasn't anywhere near finished, "Hold it," I said, "There's only four reasons I can think of why someone would be putting in that many hours. One I just mentioned; you're incompetent. If it's not that, then it must be you're afraid of your ass."
Vonda was getting mad, and as I looked around the table I knew no one was on my side. I was used to that so I went on, "I mean you work all these hours and you don't complain? Come on. Seventy hours? You must be dead on your feet. You know how that works Vonda dear. Seventy hours! Hours like that must wear you down. You must be exhausted. Damn it sis, tired and fatigued people make mistakes. In your line of work a mistake could mean death! You haven't murdered anybody lately have you?"
Now everybody was up in arms. I wasn't finished, "OK, you haven't killed anybody. You're not incompetent, and you have asked for help. But I said there are four reasons why someone would work that many hours."
My mom said, "Can't we change the subject?"
Vonda wasn't hearing it, "No let my little sister finish her rant."
God did I have her now. I went on, "Reason number three. You work seventy hours a week because you don't want to go home."
It got real quiet. I pushed in the knife, "You stay at work because it's less stressful at the hospital than at home. Maybe you don't want to go home and face Del. Maybe Del puts you on edge. Maybe Del makes you unhappy," I didn't want to do this. Del was special, everyone will find out how special later, but I had to go on. I added, "Maybe Del upsets you? We all know he wants kids, and you want your career. Do you hate to go home because he reminds you how you let him down?"
God was Vonda burning up. I think I hit some of the truth, but I still wasn't done, "Vonda what's reason number four?"
Vonda had always been jealous of me. I was the youngest. I was daddy's baby. She was the oldest; dad always held her to a higher standard. Vonda glared at me and snarled, "OK smart ass; what's reason number four?"
I had her! Gosh I really had her! I pulled out my hammer and my stake and drove it in her bitchy heart, "Vonda the fourth reason's the worst. You work seventy hours because maybe you're not actually working seventy hours. Damn it Vonda you work at a hospital! There are beds everywhere. You're young! You're hot! There are all these sexy doctors, and they're all over the place! Doctors Vonda! What does Del do? Del is a damn camera man."
I have to back up here. Del got his degree in some kind a communication electronics thing. He works at one of the local television stations in the news department. Whenever we watch something on TV, and we get the images and stuff; it's somebody like Del behind some kind of camera taking the shots. No one knows he's there; it's the kind of job that's important but he's the technician, the expert who always remains anonymous; anonymous, that's a word that is easy to grow to dislike.
I hated myself, but at that moment, that was exactly where I needed to be. I looked at Del, "Del maybe you ought to get some of those tiny voice activated recorders. Slip one in Vonda's cell phone. She'll never know. Slide one under her car seat. Next time you visit her at her office in the hospital hide one behind a chair. Maybe you should install a G.P.S unit in her car somewhere." .
I had Vonda in the corner of my eye. I knew I was being a bitch, but at that moment, at that precise instant I knew the truth. Vonda, my oldest sister, the family role model, was a lying cheating whore. I glanced briefly at Del. I felt like I'd just strangled a puppy. He knew it too!
I had to go on. I was driven. I was mad. I was insane, "Yeah Del hook up a G.P.S. Check on her car. Sure she's always at the hospital, but maybe, just maybe, sometimes her little Honda might be parked in front of the Holiday Inn down on Crowell Bridge Road."
Vonda went ballistic, "I don't have to listen to any more of this. Sherry you make me sick!"
I knew it was time to back off. I'd done what I wanted to do, now I could go back and play the politics game. "I'm sorry Vonda. Everybody knows I made it all up. We all know you're a dedicated worker. You do work a real seventy hours each week. You love your home life. You do love Del. You'd never cheat on him. God everyone knows you and he are the perfect couple. I only said the stuff I did to show everyone how easy it is make someone look bad. Sure I guess the president's made some mistakes. Don't we all? I mean look how easy it is to tear up someone as honest and as dedicated as you Vonda. Crap, think of the job the president has. I bet he puts in seventy hours each week too."
My dad finished the discussion and me off, "I'm glad that's over. Sherry I've told you before to keep your views off the table. What you've said today was way over the line. I think it's time to move on."
I looked at Vonda, "I'm sorry sis. I didn't mean it." Honestly, I meant every word.
Gary, that's Nancy's husband piped up, "How about the NFL draft. Which team do you think made out the best?"
From there the conversation went off on a new tangent.
I've got to go back to the beginning again. Remember I said Vonda and I both met Del for the first time a political seminar. Let me explain how that happened.
Me, I'm twenty-three now, but back then I was only twenty and still in college. Vonda is five years older than me, so back then she was twenty-five. I walked into the seminar first, and right away I spotted this tall handsome man seated about half way between the dais and the back door. There looked to be seating for maybe fifty or sixty people.
I tell you he was stunning. He looked to be about six feet tall, and around a hundred eighty pounds. He was built like a brick shit house. I'm sorry I cussed, but he was really something. I don't mean he was all muscle bound, far from it, he was just so well put together. He was lean and muscular, firm looking biceps and forearms; even seated I could tell he had a great ass. He was wearing this loose fitting Tee shirt, but by loose I mean it was loose in all the right places while still tight in all the other right places, that means like loose around the waist but tight across the shoulders. He was no muscle man, but the shape of his body from his waist to his shoulders made this perfect V. He had the slimmest hips; my God, if I was a man, I'd have had a hard on! I don't mean I'm gay or a lesbian or anything, I mean, well...you know what I mean.
He was dreamy. He had medium dark brown hair with red highlights. It was kind of mussed up like he needed to run a comb through. That wasn't true, what he needed was for me to run my fingers through it. He had brown eyes; they were pretty brown eyes. By that I mean they weren't the typical dark shit brown; they were a lighter shade of brown. They looked really cool; he had this sensitive vulnerable look. He needed a hug. God, he was a force of nature. I wanted to just run up there, wrap my arms around him, kiss him, and ask him to marry me!
He was sort of glancing around in that quasi-self-conscious way people who are alone someplace and don't know anyone sometimes get. I didn't want to go up and introduce myself; I wanted to go up, sit on his lap and kiss him. Just then my sister showed up. I looked at her then back at gorgeous and asked, "You know him?"
Vonda looked him over then shook her head, "No."
I asked her, "Isn't he just beautiful?" I was already having these fantasies where I'd kidnapped him, taken him to some hidden cabin, and raped him till he agreed to marry me.
She gave me one of her condescending older sister grimaces, "Him? You're kidding."
I shrugged it off. She's my older sister, she knows. I gave him a second look. I guess he wasn't that hot after all.
Just as soon as I polished off my fantasies about Prince Charming Vonda took off straight for him. She walked straight up and perched herself on the chair right beside my Mr. Right. I watched in stunned disbelief as my oldest sister, my heroine, swept right by me and proceeded to steal my vision quest right away. By the time I got to where they were Vonda had introduced herself, found out he didn't have a girlfriend, and arranged an after seminar coffee clutch at the nearby Starbucks.
I got there. Del, I found out his name was Del, was camped out on an aisle seat, and Vonda had usurped the spot right next to him so I couldn't get anywhere near him. Vonda introduced me as her 'little sis still in school'.
Off and on I listened miserably to my sister as she whispered in my dream man's ear all the things I wished I knew to how say. The seminar droned on for ninety minutes followed by a brief question and answer session, but it didn't matter. I was so sick in love, but my sister had stolen the man of my fantasies right out from under me. I hated her.
After the seminar Vonda dismissed me like I was some child, "Honey you should run along home now." Damn, she told me to go home! She said she and Del were going out for coffee and maybe some sandwiches later. I'll admit it I wanted to cry. I saw him first! I even pointed him out to her, so what did she do? She derided him to me, and then went right off and stole him!
To make a long story short Vonda found out what he did for a living, thought it was interesting and decided Del was the guy she'd marry. I think she did it just to spite me. Hell, she already had a boyfriend.
She dropped boyfriend number one like a hot potato, circled Del like a shark, and in three months she landed him. Then she had the temerity to ask me to be one of her bridesmaids. I, of course, agreed.
My heart was broken. I walked down the aisle that day in some ugly green dress, while my sister was waiting in the rear all in white. I walked down toward Del, my Del, and was I ever crying. I wasn't crying because Vonda was happy and getting married. I was crying because she was stealing my one true love right away from me. God I remembered his every visit to our house. I recalled every time he showed up to take Vonda out. He and I would talk. We were so much alike it wasn't funny. I knew, and I think he knew too, I was sister right, while Vonda was sister wrong. Did I say I hated my sister?
Look I'm not hot like Vonda, but I'm no wallflower either. I can hold my own. I just don't go after every guy I see. Vonda and Nancy were the ones who always had to have boyfriends. I'm not like that. When I was in high school I had my own car. All we girls had our own cars. As soon as we turned sixteen our dad made sure we knew how to drive a standard transmission, and we each had our own set of wheels. OK it might have been big and slow, and it might have been a gas hog, but it was mine.
Dad wanted to make sure we'd never have to be dependent on some guy. He even made sure we got Karate lessons! There's a story about that, and I'll tell it in a minute.
Look when I went out on a date I'd meet the guy at the place. I drive myself there so if I decided I didn't like the layout I could just go back home. I did that a couple times too. Honestly I never dated much, never had a steady boyfriend in high school or in college. That's what made Vonda's trick so mean. As soon as I saw Del I knew. I mean I just knew. And then she grabbed him right away from me.
So I'm not hot like Vonda, and I'm not so sexy as Chelsea or Nancy, but I'm all right. I'm 5'4". I weigh in at 120 lbs. I have brown hair I keep a little long but usually no one can tell because it's in either a bun, pig tails, or braided. I have green eyes, a pale complexion, and I'm the only sister with freckles. I think the other three are jealous of my freckles. Look I'm not big; I think to say I'm a 34B is a stretch, but I have a good shape, and I'm not bragging when I say that of the four of us I have the nicest personality. Guess what else? I'm twenty-three and I'm still a virgin! How about that! I mean if I were a man like Del I think I'd want to be with me first.
Like I said I'm small. Dad made sure we all got Karate lessons. Well there was this boy in high school, a bigger boy, a football player. He started hounding me for a date. I was never going to go out with him. He had a reputation; not that all football players had reps, but he sure did. He wouldn't leave me alone. One day in school while classes were changing he tried to corner me so he could feel me up. I ran into the girl's lavatory. He followed me! He tried to grab me so I flipped him and put him on his back. He got really hurt, not his feelings, his back! He missed like three games. Guess who got suspended for three days! They suspended me! The vice-principal said I was guilty of aggravated assault. He said I shouldn't have done what I did. Hey, did I follow muscle head in the boys' lavatory? That's my Karate story. No one believes me today, but that really is a true story.
Between me and my sisters I'm the last one still living at home. Vonda and Del are married. Nancy's married to Gary, and just a while back Chelsea moved in with her boyfriend Hank. So when everyone left later that afternoon after the big discussion at the dining room table I was left at home alone to face the music.
Mom eyeballed me first, "I'm ashamed of you Sherry. Vonda loves Del. She'd never cheat on him."
What could I say? I answered, "You're right mom. I was only trying to make a point about how easy it is to make things up about people."
Dad hit me then, "You should keep your politics to yourself. Your crazy liberal ideas will only get you in trouble."
I wasn't going to take that, not even from dad. I gave it back to him, "Yeah I know dad. Remember I studied Nineteenth Century American Literature. Someone should paint a scarlet 'L' on my blouse."