You Can't Fight Nature

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StangStar06
StangStar06
5,788 Followers

I counted at least eight or nine wounds. It made me think about that line from that Chris Rock standup routine I'd recently watched on You Tube. It's the one where he says that bullets should cost five thousand dollars apiece. That way you tell that someone had done something that was worth killing them for. Apparently, Ed had pissed someone off enough for them to pump about forty thousand dollars worth of Chris Rock bullets into him.

"Can you identify the deceased?" asked the attendant.

Both Judy and Penny sorrowfully nodded their heads. At the same time, I raised my hand. Shit, I should have yelled Eureka. At that moment I felt as if I'd discovered one of the lost secrets of the universe. If putting the bullets into Ed's body had killed him, would he come back to life if we took them out?

"Do you have a question?" asked the crypt keeper.

"Uh no," I said, realizing how stupid my thought had been.

"Again, I'm sorry for your loss. Have a great day," he said turning away. Judy and I each grabbed one of Penny's arms and led her back outside of the morgue. The detective who'd brought us there was in the waiting room. He put his hat back on his head and came to us.

"So was the deceased your husband?" he asked Judy. She nodded her head and squeezed my hand for strength.

"When he didn't come home from work last night, I got worried. Ed does a lot of things but he always calls to let me know what's going on," she said.

He seated us around his desk and asked if we wanted coffee or anything to drink. I took one look at the rancid looking coffee maker and said, "No thanks."

"What happened to him?" asked Penny.

"I can't reveal the specific details of an ongoing investigation," he began. "But, hell it's going to be in the papers by the time you get home anyway. Your husband...err...your father, young lady was found shot to death in the Sleazy Easy motel on Sycamore avenue. Also at the scene was a naked woman who was hysterical and covered in blood."

"It took us most of the night to get her calmed down enough to talk about it and say anything coherent. Apparently, she and your father had a tryst in that motel and were discovered by her husband. He kicked the door in and discovered the two of them. He had a nine mill with one of those oversized clips. He shot your father eight times and saved the last round for himself."

"After he'd shot your father, he had words with his wife, a Gladys Turnbuckle, and then stuck the gun in his own mouth and blew his brains all over the room. It was not a pleasant sight to behold. After the autopsy, we'll release the body for burial."

"Are they going to damage his body very much during the autopsy?" asked Penny.

The detective looked at her crazily. "Why miss?" he asked.

"Well, Daddy had a couple of bullet wounds to his face and head," began Penny. "If they damage his face too much trying to pull the bullets out, we wouldn't be able to have an open casket. I want a chance to look in my father's face when I say goodbye to him. I want to remember him the way he was."

"Then you'd better go back into the morgue and say good bye now," said Judy softly.

"Ma'am, I'll ask the coroner to avoid damaging his face," said the detective.

"That's not necessary," said Judy.

"Oh, it's no trouble," said the detective. "We do it all the time and in this case there's nothing to investigate. We've got video footage of the guy kicking the door in. He still had the gun in his hand when the officers got to the scene. Your husband was already dead and there's no way the woman could have moved anywhere in that room without leaving a blood and brain trail."

"Detective," said Judy icily. "What I meant was that it's not necessary because I'm not even sure we're going to claim the body. Let them bury him in the pet cemetery for all I care. And as far as my daughter wanting to remember him the way he was, they can't bury him the way he was because he always had his dick stuck in some slut. And as far as I know, it's illegal to bury more than one body in a casket. Just put him in a garbage bag and light it on fire."

Judy got up and I got up with her. Penny looked at her mother.

"She's upset," said Penny to the detective, who just nodded his head.

As soon as we got away from the detective's office, Judy's strong front faded and she started crying all over my shoulder. I drove them both home and tried to make them comfortable. For the rest of that afternoon, people who'd heard about Ed's death dropped by to offer their condolences.

My neighbor, Tanya, stopped by with a deli tray. She hugged me and asked me how I was holding up. Tanya is incredible. She has short blond hair and is kind of slim but pear shaped. She's that kind of woman who can sit down and talk, or stand up and play football with the guys, but then ten minutes later she's dresses up in a slinky dress and heels and looks great.

She's the kind of woman who isn't too girlie. But is still very feminine. If you saw her across a crowded room you'd be thanking God that you were married to her. I think they call it sneaky hot. And women like that only get better as they age.

"How are you holding up?" she asked. I shrugged my shoulders.

"It's okay, Honey, we're friends," she said. "I know you spent a lot of time with the old guy. I often saw him whenever he came over to visit. He'd be out there talking to you as you pampered the queen of the neighborhood."

Tanya was talking, of course, about my Mustang. She always told me that if her husband Rick spent as much time pampering her as I do my car, she'd be one happy girl.

"Actually, Tan..." I began. Then I kept my voice low so no one else could hear us. "I couldn't stand the old bastard. He was a serial cheater. It was just in his nature to cheat."

"You can't fight nature," she laughed.

"And Judy is such a sweetheart," I continued. "I don't know how she put up with it for so long. After she gets over his death, she'll be better off without him."

"You're high," she laughed. "Women are not like that; especially her generation. He was her first lover, her first husband, her first everything. Why do you think she kept forgiving him? She loved him dummy. She couldn't see herself with anyone else. She'd get angry with him and call him names and not give him any pussy for a while, but eventually they'd get back together. They're like magnets. They just keep pulling themselves back together. She'll be lost without him."

Tanya turned out to be wrong on a couple of things. As the weeks went on, Judy's anger at Ed didn't fade. She refused at first to even attend his funeral. I convinced her to go for Penny's sake. Penny ended up angry at her mother and at me. I'd told her that I didn't want to speak at her father's funeral.

I guess that she thought that I was just nervous about speaking in public, but truth be told, I couldn't think of a single good thing to say about the guy. In the end, one of his best friends did the deed.

His words were memorable. "We're all here to say farewell to Ed Bauer. Well...Eddie was...he was... he was Ed. You had to know him."

Even his best friend, who'd known him for forty five of his fifty years of life, couldn't think of a single good thing to say about him.

After the funeral, Judy struggled with her life. She became more a part of ours. There were some things that she simply couldn't handle. If we were watching a TV show and a guy cheated on his wife, Judy became irate. Penny and I spent a lot of time talking about what we could do for her.

Penny seemingly got over her father's death fairly easily. We just moved on with our lives. After all, it wasn't like we'd seen him every day anyway. It must have been about three months after his death that we'd gotten together with a bunch of our friends and relatives.

We'd thought that we were being sneaky. We'd invited almost every eligible man in Judy's age group that we could think of. At forty three, Judy wasn't old and she looked like she could be Penny's sister instead of her mother. The problem wasn't the guys. They were all over her. The problem was Judy. She was sweet, she was kind, but she was a one woman man. She didn't know how to flirt or work a room. Shit, when she was eighteen and her parents allowed her to start dating, Ed, who was twenty five and had already been married twice, swept her off her feet, got her cherry, got her pregnant and married her. Ed had been the only guy she'd ever dated. Judy simply didn't know the rules of the game or the game itself for that matter.

We hadn't expected anything that first time. We'd figured we'd have to make the little get-togethers a regular thing before we hit pay-dirt. The problem started after the party.

As we were cleaning up, I noticed Penny's phone on the counter. As I got near the counter, it chirped. The chirp indicated that she had a text coming in. I figured the text was from her mom thanking us for inviting her to the party. I turned the phone on and went into shock as I read the text.

"Meet U 2mro sm plc 12p"

I scrolled back through her texts and even got a location. Penny was texting some guy and meeting him. I went into shock. For a long time I just stood there staring at her phone. I felt like my world was ending. I'd had no idea that any of this was going on or even possible. Penny and I had sex so often it was crazy. When did she have time to screw anyone else?

In fact, that was why I was helping with the cleanup. Her last word to me had been, "Let's get this shit taken care of so somebody can get a blow job."

Our minds are a very tricky place. Because at that moment, as I stood there holding that small piece of plastic, glass and electronics that I'd bought for her, I felt sick. I also felt really stupid, because she'd given me all of the clues.

When her father had been caught, Penny had come down on his side every time. Most women wouldn't have been nearly as quick to defend a cheater, even when it was their own father. Penny had sprung to his defense vigorously. I'd never even questioned that perhaps she had a reason to. When she defended him, she'd always adamantly sworn that her father loved her mother. It had simply been in his nature to cheat.

Perhaps it was a case of "like father/ like daughter." After all, you can't fight nature. I guess I was expected to react the way that Judy had and just go along with it. Judy had loved that asshole a lot. She had a nature too. Hers was loving and forgiving. Perhaps that's why she'd forgiven him again and again until the end. Maybe that was where her anger with him truly lay. Maybe she wasn't actually angry that he'd been caught cheating yet again, maybe it was the fact that his death prevented her from having the opportunity to forgive him again.

"Someone isn't doing their share of the cleanup," said Penny smiling. "But it's okay. I did enough for both of us. Shall we adjourn to the boudoir?"

"Honey, I really need to adjust my brakes," I said. I watched her reaction as I said it. Her face showed traces of sadness, disappointment and anger.

"How long is it going to take?" she asked.

"It will probably take me most of the night if I do them all," I said. "Can I have a rain check? We can do it tomorrow night?" She looked at me strangely. And all kinds of thoughts went through me.

"Maybe I had something else planned for tomorrow," she smiled. "After all it's not like we don't do something almost every night. Maybe tomorrow would have been my turn."

The thought of what she'd just said pissed me off royally. So she thought there was a chance that I'd have gone down on her after she'd been with some other guy. I wondered exactly how long this had been going on. All I knew was that for now, it was over.

"Honey, I'd really like it if you could NOT do your brakes and just come to bed with me," she said.

"Honey, I'd really like it if YOU could let me do my brakes because I just spent all day grilling and entertaining people at a party for your mother, for you," I retorted.

"If you really loved me, you'd do your brakes later," she said.

"If you really loved me you'd let me do my brakes," I added.

"What's wrong with you, Donnie?" she asked. "Normally, you're after me for sex from the second we wake up until the last second that our eyes are open. Now today, when I've spent all afternoon trying to help my mom find someone new to love, you don't want it. Do you know how many of the women here told me exactly how lucky I was to have you? Even Tanya was telling me exactly what she'd do to you if I wasn't in the picture. So I want to do some of those things pretty badly right now."

"They'll still be possible tomorrow," I said. And with that, I left her standing there.

"Fine," she screamed at me through the door. And knowing Penny like I did, I saw the whole thing now. The reason she was so desperate to have sex with me tonight was because we weren't going to tomorrow. She was going to pretend to be tired or whatever, but the real deal was that she was sure that she wouldn't want to have sex with me after screwing the person she was meeting in the motel. Perhaps I was jumping to conclusions. I wouldn't know how to deal with this until it happened. Maybe something else was going on.

My mind latched onto that TV show where the woman was meeting with a guy repeatedly and her husband who was insanely jealous found out about it. The husband drove a cement truck. And he was so worried about what his wife was doing, that he drove home in the middle of a job to check on her. He saw a new Mustang convertible in his driveway and saw the guy going into his house. He backed up the cement truck and dropped the whole load of cement in the convertible and destroyed the car. It turned out that his wife wasn't cheating on him, she'd arranged financing on the Mustang as a present for him and he'd wrecked it. She ended up divorcing him.

The next morning, I went off to work as usual. I didn't do anything out of the ordinary. I woke up and Penny made me breakfast. As she bent over the table putting bacon on my plate, I reached around her and tweaked her nipples. While I did that, I rubbed my pants covered dick on her ass.

"Oh, so last night all you wanted was to play with your stupid car," she said. "Now all of a sudden you're ready to go."

"I'm sorry," I said. "I love you Pen." I kissed her so passionately that she was gasping for air.

"What got into you this morning?" she asked smiling.

"I just wanted you to know how much I care about you," I said. I felt like shit. I felt like this was my last chance to convince her not to do something that we'd both regret. At the same time, if nothing was going on and I was getting this all wrong, I wouldn't feel as guilty afterward."

I drove off to work and as soon as I got there, I dug into my morning assignments. By nine-thirty, I was ahead of schedule and had almost nothing to do. I worked for a couple of more hours and left at eleven thirty. Just as I was leaving the building, Penny called me.

"Hey, Honey," she said. "Would you like to have lunch with your wife?"

"I'd love to," I said smiling. "Do you want me to meet you at home or at a restaurant?"

I was breathing a heavy sigh of relief. I was so glad I'd jumped to the wrong conclusion.

"Hang on sweetheart, I have another call," she said. She came back a few seconds later. "Donnie, can we do lunch tomorrow, mom needs to talk?" she said.

"I'll probably be busy," I said and hung up. I called Judy.

"Hi," I said. "How's your day going?"

"Even better after speaking to my favorite son in law," she said smiling.

"I'm your only son in law," I dead panned.

"But you're still my favorite," she said.

"Did you speak to Penny yet today, Judy?" I asked. "She's going to ask you something."

"Well, I hope you guys aren't going to try to hook me up with one of your lonely old friends again," she said. "Truthfully, I'm not sure I'm ready to meet anyone yet."

"Nope, I just wanted to invite you to dinner with just the three of us," I said.

"Oh, Okay," she said smiling. "I'd enjoy that. When she calls I'll act surprised."

"Bye Judy," I said. "Have a great day."

The call had delayed me by another ten minutes and I now knew that Penny had called to ask me to lunch just to make sure that I was at work. Maybe she'd learned some of her techniques for cheating from her father, but then the old bastard got caught a lot.

I got into my car and drove over to the motel. There were several cars in the parking that I thought might be familiar. It didn't matter. I spotted Penny's Ford focus as soon as I got there. I knew exactly which room to go to. I spotted a cleaning lady and paid her fifty bucks to open the door to the room as silently as possible. She backed away and I opened the door.

There was a familiar looking flabby back and a thinning head of hair that seemed vaguely familiar to me. "Fuck me...Fuck me Rick," screamed the woman he was on top of. There was no question in my mind who it was. As soon as I yanked the door open, he tried to turn to see what was going on. I crossed the room in an instant and dragged him off of the bed.

I slammed him against the hard, cheap floor boards and just started pounding him. In a matter of seconds, I'd blackened both of his eyes. I continued to pound him. I heard a sick sounding snapping sound and he screamed like a girl. I had broken his nose. He was no longer even trying to defend himself.

"Donnie, you're going to kill him," screamed Penny, trying to drag me off of him. I very calmly stood up and pulled her hands off of me.

"Don't ever touch me again," I said calmly. I called my secretary and told her I wasn't feeling well and I wouldn't be in for the rest of the day and probably not the next day either.

The second call I made was to 911 to report that there'd been a beating. Penny just sat there on the bed. A couple of times she tried to say something to me and I just kept telling her to shut the fuck up.

"Donnie, when we get home..." she began finally.

"We don't have a home," I said. "I won't live with a slut. Go stay with your mother, Penny."

The police got there and I walked out of the room and spoke to them. "I'm the one who called," I said.

"You don't look too bad," said one of the cops.

"I'm not, he is," I said pointing at Rick, who was still unconscious.

They handcuffed me and put me in the car just as the ambulance got there.

I didn't say much in the police cruiser. The officers tried to get me to talk about what had happened. Although I would have had no problem admitting what I'd done, I was simply too depressed to talk about it.

Once I got to the station, I was photographed and finger printed and booked on suspicion of assault. Until the details of the case came down, all they had was suspicion. Even though I was willing to tell them that I'd done it, they had no proof. In every large city in the world, there are countless nutcases who admit to every crime from the Lindbergh kidnapping to the ripper murders in London.

There are also leagues of homeless people who will admit to a crime just to get a few meals and a cot to lie down on. This is especially true during bad weather, when some people will give up their freedom to have a roof over their heads.

I was placed in a large holding cell with at least eight other guys. None of them approached me and I was content to sit on an empty bench along the back wall. Most of the guys looked like they were either poor or drunk.

I decided to use the time wisely. Since all I could really do was to think, it seemed to be the perfect time to consider my next move. There is a big difference between suspecting that your spouse is cheating on you and being faced with the reality of it. There is also the question of emotional attachment. Let's face it folks, people change over time. There are a lot of cases where the couple has simply grown so far apart that one of them does something drastic just to get the ball rolling.

StangStar06
StangStar06
5,788 Followers