Your Fallen Hero Ch. 01

Authors note - Thankyou for taking the time to read my work, i know this chapter is fairly short, but it is only the introduction to the story about how Joe and Jacob meet. Enjoy.

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It was mentally exhausting, and that's without adding how physically exhausting it was to push yourself every day, into something that felt so impossible. Joe gripped the edges of his bed, the small comfort of a mattress felt like a prison these days, and despite how he had been advised to wait for a nurse to help him into his wheel chair, he was just to stubborn.

Relying on someone so completely was to much for him. He was a strong man, reduced to nothingness and nothing in his life had ever angered him more. The staff in the small private hospital watched him non-stop, because they knew the minute they turned their backs he would try to do stuff on his own, rather than ask for help. He had shared this argument with them over and over again, but only one person seemed to hear and understand him, and that unlikely person was none of the females, but a man.

His name was Jacob, and he stood at only five feet four inches, but he was strong for a little guy, being that he could lift Joe and move him about easily, and Joe was three times his size or rather he had been before he had lost the use of his legs. He leaned over the side of his bed, and reached out a hand for his wheel chair that had been conveniently placed out of reach. But his hand fell just short and his body tipped violently towards the floor.

The impact as he made contact with the tiled flooring knocked the air clean out of his lungs. He grunted and twisted against the pain that shot through his spine, and he realized to his horror that his tumble must of made a considerable amount of noise, for nurses and doctors come rushing towards him from all directions. Squawking their disapproval as he managed to grab hold of the wheel chair, and used it's foot rests to drag it closer towards him.

Overwhelmed by the pain he didn't have the energy to try and drag himself from the ground. But it also made him grit his teeth in annoyance at the female nurse who forced her arm beneath his elbow. She meant well, and she was only trying to help him but as far as Joe was concerned he had been helped enough, and he just wanted to do something on his own. He wanted to sit there against the cold tiled floor, untouched and unbothered by the people around him, so he could reflect upon what he had just done, without people giving their opinions on how stupid his actions were. He just couldn't take it any more.

Jacob's voice peeled through the people, and Joe looked up just in time to see the concern flash across his face. The man was a softy, always the most caring of people no matter how Joe warned him that if he kept putting to much of his feelings out there, he would make himself ill from the reality and the sadness that surrounded them ever day. The woman's nails pinched at his skin as she gripped him tightly, but it was useless, she wouldn't be able to help Joe even if she had wanted to, and he found himself glaring at her defensively as he pulled his arm out of her grasp.

"Off!" he gritted the words out at her through his teeth.

"Now Joe, there is no need to be like that." she frowned down at him and braced her hands against her hips, as though he were nothing more than an irritating child.

"It's Mr Archant to you."

"I'm sorry I'm late." Jacob took his coat off and threw it against Joe's bed. "It's ok Mary, let me handle this."

Ever the diplomat, Jacob gave the woman a tender smile and ushered her away, and she left but not without giving Joe a dirty look first.

"I'm ten minutes late and you already get yourself in trouble?"

"What can I say?"

Jacob shook his head at him, because he knew it was pointless arguing with him about what he could and couldn't do. That was when Joe noticed the purple hue streaked across his left cheek bone. He stopped him in his tracks as he bent over to help him, by raising his hand up to touch at the sore area. Conscious of Joe's actions Jacob turned away from him and busied himself with Joe's wheel chair instead.

"What happened?"

"It's nothing." Jacob answered as he moved the wheel chair into a better position.

"Same as your split lip a few months ago. Let me guess, you fell?"

Jacob frowned at him with those big brown eyes, he chewed his lip subconsciously in the same place that had not long healed. It was a nervous action, the same way he tucked his hair behind his ear and avoided eye contact. Joe was positive he had a whole book of excuses, it just annoyed him that none else noticed the marks, and none seemed to do anything about it. Not that Jacob would ever admit who had caused them. Or why they were there. Naturally, it was also none of Joe's business to interfere, but he couldn't understand why anyone would want to hurt someone with a sweet nature like him.

"Let's get you up into this chair so I can take you for breakfast."

"I'm not hungry."

"Well, you don't want me to force feed you now do you?"

"Impossible."

Jacob laughed at him, and the sound always seemed to have the strangest effect on him. It was as though that sound alone could make his insides smile, and the sight of his lips crinkling at it's edges, cushioned by those dimples... what was he saying?

Horrified by his own wandering thoughts, he let Jacob slide his arms beneath his without a hint of protest. His scent as strong as foreign spices wafted in Joe's face, and he was uncomfortably aware of their closeness as he wrapped his arms about the younger man's neck, and let him lift him from the ground. He placed him down into the chair gently, completely oblivious to the responses he was getting from Joe's body, and he was glad because, well, he couldn't handle the disappointment of another person drawing themselves away from him because of what he was.

He was gay, nothing more, nothing less. He wasn't infected, or some foreign species. He just liked men. That also didn't make him desperate, or some monster that was capable of raping anything with a pulse. He had feelings and standards, and it had always confused the life out of him how straight men heard the words 'I'm gay' and suddenly felt they were fair game. He didn't want Jacob to look at him like they did, or to distance himself because he feared what he didn't understand. And, of course it didn't help that he was undoubtedly straight with his ever controlling ex girlfriend, who was undoubtedly responsible for those markings.

Joe wished he could feel the softness of his hands upon his legs as he lifted them gently onto the foot rests. He longed to know the sensation, and even though he could imagine how it would feel, it just wasn't enough.

"So, what's for breakfast today? Pancakes? Porridge? Mmmm, I think I'll have Porridge, what about you?"

The tone of his voice as he thought wistfully about food sent shivers through the top half of Joe's body. He smiled up at the brown twinkling eyes that watched him carefully as he rounded the chair. He had got into the habit of eating breakfast with him ever since Joe had been flown back from Iraq broken and bruised. Why? He did not know, but he made it no secret that he enjoyed Joe's company, and had even once told him that he loved him, platonic-ally of course, which had been both thrilling and heart wrenching. He still didn't know how he felt about that.

"Pancakes."

Jacob's thumb brushed against Joe's ear affectionately, it was meant as an encouragement for agreeing to eat, and to say thank you for trying and for not fighting him on the subject like he had done so many times before. The truth was, Joe was exhausted with fighting him, the man just never seemed to give up. He was stubborn, and caring and Joe actually believed he would try to force feed him given half the opportunity.

He rolled him out of the room and into the corridor. The space was wide and spacey, which meant it was very cold. It made him acutely aware that he was still in his pajamas the nurse had helped him dress in last night, as the coldness that surrounded them moved through it's fabric and bit at his skin. He shivered but tried to hide it, anything that made him feel remotely weak he ignored right now. Because in this world it seemed it was a never ending story of kicking you while you're down. One thing after another pummeling you to the bottom of all your emotions.

When Jacob rolled him into the kitchen with it's small sitting lounge for it's patients, Joe was relived that the warmth spilled out from the kitchen. The smell of food cooking on the stoves had his stomach rumbling despite his desire not to eat. His body had not lost any of it's appeal towards food, but some days he felt so miserable that the thought of everything was just too much.

A small part of him was glad to be getting out of this place in the next couple of hours. A change might do some good for his mind, and even though the objects of the hospital had become familiar in the past months, he would feel better about being in his own space again. He wasn't yet sure of how his parents would cope with looking after him for a while. He wished he didn't have to expect them to do so, but he knew without their support they would not release him so early.

He remembered the first time he had told his mother he was signing up for the army, and the horror in her eyes when he had explained to her, that his ultimate goal was to become a sniper. Through fear and anger she had begged him not to go through with it, and when he had refused to listen she had told him that when the day come, where he'd rely upon them through his injuries she would not look after him. It seemed harsh, when he thought back over that argument they had had. But now? He realized she had been right all along, it was and had never been a matter of luck, to her it was certain that her baby would come back hurt, or worse not come back at all.

He hated how selfish he had been, wanting her to understand him, his decisions, and his feelings. But all along he hadn't been understanding her. He had thought he was invincible, that he wouldn't be one of those victims, or at-least he had hoped he wouldn't be. And, now that he was home, and he had come away with his life, when so many others hadn't he felt terrible for being so weak and so useless. How would he ever make it up to his family, to his mother? Because he didn't regret his time in the services to the British army, and he didn't regret the wonderful people he had met. He just regretted not being able to slaughter the men that tortured him, and left him this way.

He closed his eyes against the painful memories. He could see their faces, and replays of what they had done to him, as clear as the room before him when he opened his eyes. Noises, smells, anything could remind him of them, and of the pain he had suffered. There never seemed to be an escape, and some days he found it hard to appreciate his freedom, because every day he relived the hell of his memories.

"You're quiet today Joe." Jacob said as he gave Joe's shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"Just thinking."

"Watch you don't hurt yourself."

Joe looked up at him in surprise, but Jacob had already started to wander away to fetch their breakfast. He rolled himself off to a table of his choice, and toyed with the napkins that had already been set out for the morning patients. It was only then did it set in that this was likely to be the last breakfast he and Jacob would spend together. The thought struck a raw nerve as he studied the younger man from his distance. He had been the only thing that kept him sane in the past few months, breakfast without him? Just wouldn't be the same.

As though he could sense Joe's eyes upon him, he turned and flashed him a hearty smile. He didn't feel the same happiness, but it was extremely difficult not to smile back at him.