Using the Midnight Oil as Lube

I wanted to be the first to fuck midnight,
Just screw the hell out of the witching hour
I wanted to use the moon for a condom and devour
All her blinking eyes, tie her up with a lovers bight.

But woe, is me, you got there first,
Raging lesbian in black combat boots,
Flannel shirt and ill-dyed roots,
You used night’s sex to quench your thirst.

Alas, sloppy seconds, you suck and I durst
Slip casually into this union of night and day
You have truly ruined my dreams. Bitch.

But I’ll be the first to cry, “Do thy worst!
Have at thee, Day, I’ll slay you this way:
On your head, a voodoo curse! Jock itch.”

I’ll shake my voodoo stick with all my might
And dance an arcane dance of power
I’ll chant and gesture, grin and glower
Until you scratch and fill with fright.

And when you’ve fallen to the deadly itch,
I’ll watch you writhe and moan and twitch.